You can't do this! I'm seventeen. I'm a child. This is kidnapping. What will my mother think? She'll be worried sick. That letter didn't even make any sense. It's a joke. This is a joke, right? I just want my mother. This isn't funny.
I'm going to skip the freaking out and whinging that all the rest of you bloody people are doing, because Merlin knows you're doing enough for all of us.
Instead, I'm going to say, that I'm headed to dance club, and going to get wasted and see if the foam machine is working. Who is joining me for a four day rave?
And if you're the type who needs a name, Scorpius Malfoy, at your pleasure and mine.