atypicalsnowman (atypicalsnowman) wrote in severus_sighs, @ 2009-10-14 17:25:00 |
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Entry tags: | ficlet, member: atypicalsnowman, pairing: severus/harry, pairing: severus/lucius, pairing: ss/hp/lm, rating: r |
Best Laid Plans by atypicalsnowman
Title: Best Laid Plans
Author: atypicalsnowman
Pairing: SS/HP SS/LM/ SS/HP/LM
Rating: R
Word Count: 1k+
Warnings: *Threesome, crack, breaking the fourth wall*
Summary: Harry and Lucius are forced to make the best of it...for Severus, of course.
A/N: For whitecotton on her birthday. May you have the best of days, darling, and know that you truly are adored. Mwah! That being said, this is in response to your birthday fic to me.
atypicalsnowman sat on a love seat in a room somewhere off the Lounge. On either side of her sat two men, different as night and day. It had been hell just to get them in the same room together, and she knew it would be far more difficult to get them to agree to her plan.
Her mission, however, was clear.
"Right," she said, taking a drag on her cigarette. "Look, I know you two hate each other. You haven't exactly gone out of your way to hide that fact."
Harry scoffed while Lucius smirked and took a sip of his drink.
"But the fact remains that today is WhiteCotton's birthday, and she enjoys reading both of you with Severus."
Harry grumbled something into his sleeve and snow lifted an eyebrow.
"Yes, I know she says she doesn't like you much, but look at what's she's written." She smiled kindly at Harry, realizing she needed him on her side. He was the nice one, after all.
"I fail to understand why this is necessary," Lucius said as he put his drink down. "Severus is..." he drifted off with a grin that could only be described as aristocratic, and then added, "quite capable of handling us both, given a bit of recovery time. There's no need for either of us to ever see the other."
"I agree," Harry said, angrily.
snow sighed and took another drag. "Look, you don't have to like each other; you don't even have to be attracted to each other. You just need to have sex. How difficult is that?"
Lucius sneered while Harry made a 'yuck' sound.
"See, that's what I'm talking about, Harry. She'd like you a bit more if you didn't do things like that."
Harry gagged and waved his arms around. "But how could you stand it? I mean, look at him!" he cried as he gestured to Lucius...
Lucius, who was draped in fine cloth that hung on his frame neither too snug nor too loose, allowing the lines of his well-crafted muscles to show just enough.
"Right..." snow said, suddenly distracted. "But you love Severus, don't you?"
Harry sighed. "You know I do."
snow nodded. "And you want WhiteCotton to have a good birthday."
Harry fidgeted. "Well..."
"She has written some very good parts for you, you know. You even got to top once in her Snarry Games fic."
Harry straightened up at that, as if he had only just remembered.
"Okay, so now that that's settled, can you two agree to do this with Severus, for her sake?"
Lucius frowned and said, "I still fail to see why this is necessary, especially since I will not bend over for Potter–"
"Like I'd stick my cock in your arse! It'd probably try to bite it off!"
snow sputtered and said, "Look, I said you don't have to touch each other. Maybe..." she said, leering, "Harry, you can fuck Severus while Lucius gets on his knees and licks his balls...or something."
"I can do that," and, "Not a chance in hell," was said at the same time, both men turning to glare at each other.
"Why wouldn't you?" Harry asked Lucius.
"I fall to my knees for no man," Lucius said with a sniff while Harry muttered, 'besides Voldemort,' under his breath.
"And aside from that," Lucius continued, ignoring Harry. "Not everyone is as enthusiastic as you when it comes to performing fellatio."
Harry glared at Lucius. "I knew it," he whispered. "You're not even gay, are you? You're just a strutting peacock, a breeder, in gay man's clothing!"
The accusation seemed to be taken as a slap in the face as Lucius' eyes went wide.
"How dare you! I enjoy a good rogering as much as the next man!"
"Oh? But you won't suck Severus' cock?"
"I said nothing of the sort. I simply don't enjoy having my mouth fucked as much as you appear to."
"You married a woman!"
"Women of good breeding do not usually accept propositions simple to be a breeding mare. I needed an heir!"
"But you had sex with a woman!"
"Heir, Potter!"
snow simply rolled her eyes and watched the scene play out. This wasn't looking good for WhiteCotton at all.
*
Severus left the Lounge, shutting the door with a slam, the sound of female laughter and sighs being drowned out as he brushed himself off.
"By Merlin, they'll be the death of me," he said, adjusting himself in his trousers. He walked toward the room snow had requested he visit, the little one just a few steps away with the closed door.
Opening the door, he was surprised to hear the sound of grunting and moaning– familiar grunting and moaning. Quickly, he walked in and was astounded by what was happening.
"Like this, do you?" Harry grunted as he thrust into Lucius, blond hair tossed back across his shoulders as he panted. "Come on, say you like it!"
"Shut up...and...fuck me, Potter!"
Severus stood gobsmacked as he watched two of his favorite lovers engage in what appeared to be very angry sex in front of...
"My God, woman, why haven't you stopped them?" he asked snow, the horror of the situation displayed clearly on his face.
"Um," snow said, not taking her eyes off the two. "Right...why would I do that?"
Severus lifted an eyebrow and watched as Lucius' eyes rolled back and his head dropped down. Sweat was running down Harry's forehead, dripping slowly down his neck and chest, his disheveled state a stark contrast with Lucius' beauty. Severus adjusted his trousers again and couldn't help but watch the scene play out.
"You know," snow said slowly, "you could join them."
Severus thought about this for a moment—a very short moment—then began to remove his robes.
*
"Excellent," said snow as she watched Severus enter Harry from behind, then tore her eyes away from the sight.
This had been easier than she'd thought. She took a picture for later and opened the door wide.
"Hey, WhiteCotton, get in here! My gift is ready for you!"