Daily Scans - Wherein Starman Learns A Hard Lesson About Cosmic Rod Construction
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09:53 pm [thanekos]
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Wherein Starman Learns A Hard Lesson About Cosmic Rod Construction or: Ted Knight gets taken out rather anticlimactically.
context is simple: every golden age hero ever is fighting an atomic ubermensch with the brain of the world's greatest villain, under James Robinson's pen.. or keyboard, whatever he assembles symbols into sentences with.
said ubermensch, known as Dynaman before the revelation of who he really was (for which he has a certain ex-Delores Winters to thank) has been pretty much cleaning house; guys like the Red Bee and Black Condor prove no challenge to him, while somewhat more powerful heroes such as Green Lantern and Hawkman have proven two-page fight scenes to him at best.
speedster Johnny Quick, realizing that things are going to hell in a handbasket very quickly after the former Dynaman fells Green Lantern in the span of one of those two-three page slugfest, calls upon the last hero who might actually have a chance of stopping this madman.

... and engineer of larger, more powerful, and glaringly fragile cosmic rods. go with the smaller, compact design, Ted. Please.
(also, it should be plenty obvious from the hair whose brain's in that body. look up the golden age, at any rate- the revelation is sporfle-worthy.)
it's a happy ending, at any rate. after that, captain comet makes his debut distracting dynaman long enough for liberty belle to shove a fragment of ted's failure at engineering right through dynanazi's chest, and down he goes.
bonus: a zemo fights a union jack!


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That's not so much an engineering failure as a strategic failure.
yeah, that was a " which word should go here? I know, this one! " moment
Hrm...you know, I think I should mention the facepalm was for Ted's entertaining screwup, not your word-choice. >_>
But, yeah, definitely a strategic error raising the damn thing over his head and making a big speech.
You'd think, or at least hope, that Ted would either know better than to monologue at a time like that, or would have long since gotten it out of his system. Rookie mistake, sheesh.
Well, to be fair...he's fighting a superpowered Hitler. It'd be hard to resist the temptation in those circumstances.
(also, it should be plenty obvious from the hair whose brain's in that body. look up the golden age, at any rate- the revelation is sporfle-worthy.)
... It isn't to me, and I'm sure I'm not the only one.
Think of (real world) Nazis with distinctive hairstyles.
You know where GOLDEN AGE lost me?
They saved Hitler's brain. That's where.
It's a collector's item. It's still valuable, even without the original packaging.
I'd like to imagine a story where Hitler's brain was saved and placed in a jar or something to keep it alive, but then lost in the confusion of post war Berlin, and ending up in a warehouse somewhere, possibly being sold off to collectors and such over the years, and by the time they actually plug it into a robot or something it can move, the combination of long isolation and senility have long since reduced Hitler's mind to mush.
So they take it out and use it as a paper weight.
But . . . but! That's the best part!!!
Aaron "The Mad Whitaker" Bourque; actually, the second best part, the best part is it's the Ultra-Humanite who saved Hitler's brain.
Monologuing is always a bad idea in a fight. Don't matter if you are a good guy or bad guy.
You're skipping over the fact that Ted's been suffering a nervous breakdown for the whole series. If he'd been in better shape, or this was at night, he'd have been on his game.
Aww, sweet! Original Union Jack! Also, time-traveling reformed Zemo! Regretfully, I have not read that storyline, but it sounds like it was cool. (Also, I love the original UJ outfit - very old-style English military.) |
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