eddie likes to (riddlethem) wrote in rooms, @ 2014-06-28 13:07:00 |
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Entry tags: | !mass effect, *log, eddie nigma, stephanie brown |
Who: Eddie/Steph (part 2)
Where: Citadel
When: Right after this conversation.
What: showing off a new door
Warnings: making out/talking about sexy stuff
Eddie gave her a flat look when all she did was put her legs up on his lap. He shrugged, like it was her loss and then slowly, painfully slow, pulled down one of the knee-high stockings and ran his fingers over the bare skin as if it were very scandalous for him to do so. Truthfully, touching her was a grounding thing. It was a rush, a tease, but it also pulled him down from that cloud of logic and mazes he liked to sit in sometimes. “No, nothing that noble.” He said sadly. If Stephanie loved this place like he did? She’d be pushing herself to be the next Shepard. That was her style. Eddie wasn’t that good of a person. He knew what needed to be done to save this universe, anyone who played the games did, but he wasn’t going to put in the work to do it.
“I’m here for myself.” Eddie told her honestly and he hated the idea that he was claiming a door his playground while he figured out what kind of man he was. “I want-” Eddie ran his fingers down her leg and curled them under the inside of her boot. “I’m not really here to make a difference. I can’t. But, I want to do something good and feel something. Anything. I want to see how far I’ll let myself go in the other direction. I want to know who I am and that can’t happen in Gotham.” He had too many people to worry about, too many responsibilities in Gotham.
The riddled man looked up at her and rolled his lips together thoughtfully. “While you were in the hospital, me, Diana, Zee and Constantine went up against the cult. They had made a base in the Iceberg Lounge and kidnapped a man with angel wings. I ran up to him, I pulled the hooks out of his shoulders and I boomtubed him somewhere safe to heal him. On the trip there, a cultist snuck in through the portal after us and tried to choke me. So I stabbed him and then I shot him to death. Not even an hour after I made the League members promise not to kill any humans.” Eddie reached for her hand. “I didn’t feel anything when I killed the man. I didn’t feel anything when I saved the angel. I just did it because all this hero stuff is so automatic to me now. And, yet, I’m compelled. What if it’s just my OCD taking a new form, baby? What if all of this is just me doing what I’m good at and my mind telling me I have to?”
God, it killed him to admit this stuff to her. He knew she wasn’t frightened by the way his mind worked, but it felt so inhuman. It made him feel like she deserved someone who felt the same way she did about things. Eddie squeezed her hand and then sighed. “I want to help someone and feel it. I want to stop myself from hurting someone because it’d hurt me.”
Stephanie smiled a little stupidly as he touched her, his fingers caressing her skin and the alcohol in her veins combining into something delightful that she had been aching for the past couple of days. That she had been dreaming about in her bed all alone or on that sandy, warm beach when she’d been speaking to him on the phone. She inhaled a little as his hands wandered further down, but she didn’t stop him. She just shifted a little closer still, curve of her thighs pressed against his, and encouraged him to needle as far as he could without it getting downright inappropriate. And as he spoke, she pushed through the good feelings of him being so close to actually listen. They hadn’t spoken so frankly in a while, and it was part of the reason she and Eddie weren’t themselves the past month or so.
“Hey,” she said softly. Her free hand, the one he wasn’t gripping onto, skated up and down his chest before grabbing his tie to play with it a little. She tried to anchor him there, to let him know with her earnest blue eyes and loving face that she would be there for him no matter what. They were partners, they were their other halves. As daunting as adjustment and discovery might be, she was going to be by his side while he did it. Just like she wanted him to be by her side as she did the same. It was kind of natural, wasn’t it? To have to adjust themselves, rediscover themselves, enlighten themselves. Not just because of coming home from a bloody, lethal war, but marriage, and moving onto the next step, and realizing what their lives were really going to be like now that they were two halves of a whole.
She tugged once on that silk fabric of his tie before her hand slid to cup his jaw delicately. “That? You’re allowed to have to work through all of that. We just came back from fighting for our lives for five years, Eddie. We both need the time to fix ourselves or find ourselves and what we want out of life now. I have no fucking clue what I really want out of life. The only things that are guaranteed, that I know I need in my life are you and the life we’re about to really start together. So, take your time. And we’ll figure it out. You and I will figure out what we’re both supposed to do, and it’s going to be okay. Whatever happens, it’s going to be okay.” Her thumb brushed against his jawline. “Okay?” She smiled gently. Reassuringly. “I don’t want to push you down a path that isn’t yours. The only thing I want from you is to promise me that we won’t lose us. That you’ll still be my wonderful husband and that you want to be the father of our babies.”
She could feel the heat of air escaping his lungs through his nose as she spoke to him, his dark eyes intense and set on her like she was deciding his fate between life and death. Stephanie had seen Eddie at his worst, his absolute worst and she was always there to remind him that it’d never hit any of those low notes he used to play by before he decided to reform. She accepted who he was. She let him have time to figure out what kind of man he was and that was a lifesaver in a way he couldn’t articulate. “Thank you.” He said it like she was doing him a favor, even if she’d find that kind of silly. But, he wasn’t a normal person, he never would be. His mind and sympathies worked like Harley’s and the rest of the rogue gallery. The cat, for all her claims of being a darker grey, never got close to the emptiness for humanity that could hollow out his chest.
But, he loved her. He loved the family they were going to build together before the kids were even conceived and when a Gotham kid fell in love? It was the real deal. “Nothing is more important to me than our family. I love you, Stephanie. And, I’m putting you and all the kids we have together first. Every time. Not because I have to, not because it’s the right thing to do, but because I want to. I love you. That feels right.” Eddie said with tipsy confidence, that bare truth laid out like it was nothing. Like it was so obvious it almost didn’t need to be said. When this world started to crumble, was Eddie going to be at the front lines trying to save it? Hell no. He’d do good, he’d find out who he was and that would be enough.
Eddie leaned in, holding her hips to pull her closer and kissed her like they were alone and back in the apartment. He pushed her against the curve of the couch, fingers trailing up her thigh in response to that tiny invitation she gave him before the conversation got serious. He dragged his lips down to her neck and whispered. “Did you learn anything while you were gone? Were you glad I wasn’t bothering you for days and days?” He looked up and kissed her bottom lip before pulling away from her. Were people staring? Yeah. That kind of scene was for Purgatory not this casino. But, that didn’t matter. Eddie only cared about pushing her too far. He feared that anxiety in her chest and that gross feeling he got in his stomach from feeling as though he abused her. Eddie was learning slow. That was why he pulled back. He could give a damn if they threw him out of this casino for copping a feel on his lady.
“I love you, too,” Stephanie responded with a smile, assuaged even if she wasn’t particularly worried that he was going to dump her and their yet-existent family to go on a journey of self-discovery on his own. But the niggling concern existed in the back of her brain, as it would in anyone’s, and his words brought instant relief. “That feels right for me, too. You and our kids are always going to come first. Always.” Steph would always be a bat, and she would always want to do the right thing, but that promise right then and there meant that she had no goddamn intention of putting Gotham or anything else before the family they were going to be. Was it selfish? Fuck yes, but did she care? Not really. Not after everything she had been through. Her other family mattered, of course, and the city she loved did, too, and so did doing good. But Eddie and their babies would always be the number one priority.
A surprised noise slipped out of her throat as he pushed up on her, and she returned that kiss with a wanton greed that clicked on the second she could feel his body against hers. Her heart raced up into her throat, hand falling onto his to guide it further up her thigh. Lusty need for him burying any sort of fear of being pushed too far in the moment. She could feel her head get a little light headed as his mouth dragged down her neck, and she tangled her hands into his hair without a goddamn care for who was watching them. Her laugh was throaty as he teased her with a kiss. “I learned that I am definitely attracted to men,” she teased, leaning up to nip his neck, just above his Adam’s apple, and catch his mouth in another kiss. This one slow and measuring with as little room for air as possible. The kiss broke with a pop, and she sat up a little, one sock down and legs open slightly. “And that I probably want you to bother me at least once a day when we aren’t together. And that maybe I worry a little too much about you. But I probably don’t.” Her hand slid down his front. “All this introspective time gave me a chance to think about what I want out of everything, too.”
And then Stephanie looked proud. “I asked Selina if she would help me get ready for the wedding, and she said yes.”
Eddie pushed his fingers up her leg and under the dress, his eyes a dark, silent question. “I want to take you home.” He whispered, leaning his head back on the couch as he gazed up at her. Stephanie was the kind of girl he liked showing off, even back on Earth-3, but good god did she make him want to have her all to himself tonight. Eddie drifted his fingertips over her bare thigh and then dragged his hand back to rest safely on her knee. They had a lot of catching up to do in the bedroom, but tonight he was playing coy. The second he got her in the apartment alone, he wouldn’t let her leave. No, he was determined to make this night end with them parting their separate ways here at the casino.
He grinned when she told him that Selina would help her get ready. “I told you she wanted to, baby.” Eddie said gently without that know-it-all tint to his words. He was just glad Selina wanted to be there for her and could tolerate him enough that she’d have a good time. “Harley’s going to be helping me. I was dreading the wedding, not because I didn’t want to get married, but because I didn’t think anyone would go, but I don’t think that’s the case anymore. And, you know what? I don’t care if they’re just going to be there to gawk or sulk or whatever the fuck they want. We’re going to be married.”
Steph trained her blues on his browns as his fingers roamed further up, not discouraging or stopping him. She brushed her nose against his, eyes closing and hand sliding back up his chest then rounding over his shoulder. “Oh, really? And what would you do if you took me home?” she asked with a smile, stealing a quick, teasing kiss before arching back just a little. She knew she had to go back to the Amazons, and he had some job to do, but they could play pretend for a little while. Plus? This time away from each other would make their wedding and honeymoon all the sweeter. It wasn’t about deprivation. Not really.
“Yeah, yeah,” she murmured, rolling her eyes in that way he loved. As well as she and Selina were getting along the past couple of months, Steph hated the idea of pushing her tentative friendship with the cat too far. She liked Selina. She liked where their friendship was. It was an interesting, mutual relationship of support that came at a time when they both needed it. Oh, Selina was probably right about them fighting over the years still, but Steph didn’t want to destroy anything now. So, asking Selina to help her get ready for the wedding was a shot in the dark, and she was so, so glad the kitty said yes.
“I trust Harley almost completely. I’m gonna have to tell her only a couple of shots before the ceremony,” she teased, hand trailing down his arm as she shifted a little better into his lap. Almost flush in his lap, just a tease, just able to push him a little further. She liked the slow thing they were doing lately. It made everything else all the sweeter. “It’s going to be wonderful. Not perfect.” Because nothing in Gotham was and now that she was feeling a little better it was easier to grasp that. “But it’s going to be wonderful. We’re getting married next week, baby. Who gives a fuck about anything or anyone else?”
“I’d let you pick the first place you want me to make sweet love to you in the Mass Effect door. Bed? Counter? Couch? Up against that beautiful, big window? Want to be bad and find a place here? Anywhere you want.” Eddie murmured, playing into the fantasy with her. If she insisted, he’d go for it. He wouldn’t even think twice. But, she was pulling away and he knew that the rules to this game went a certain way. Rules he likely made up himself without thinking what the consequences would be. Eddie kissed one of her roaming hands before she moved away and then with a sigh laid back on the couch, out of her space.
He took another sip of his drink and watched the casino around him. The people idly playing the slots, the video feeds of races and tournaments. “She thinks I’m going to get nervous. Harley promised to give me plenty to drink. I think everyone is going to be drunk.” Eddie said with a smirk. “I honestly wish we were already married. Maybe eloping was the right idea, but people seem excited for it. Even if a fight breaks out or something’s ruined, I don’t think I care anymore.” And, that was a good feeling. “I’m still dreading seeing Bruce there, but that’s how everyone feels, I think.”
Steph rumbled out something sweet at his suggestions, her legs sliding across his lap again in that achingly slow sort of way. “Mmm, all very good options, baby.” She reached out for the tie again, tugging him until he was close enough to run her free hand down his jaw. “What about right on this couch, huh? Where everyone could see?” Her thumb brushed across his stubble, nails scraping down his jaw, and she smirked up at him. They wouldn’t risk something like that, something so raw and Earth-3 that it might push one of them to the brink, but it was good to play pretend for a little bit, right? To remind each other that down the line that would be something both of them wanted.
She relented a little after a moment, hand falling away from his jaw, but she kept a grip on his tie and her legs in his lap as she leaned forward to grab her drink as well. She clinked it against his glass before taking a generous sip. “As long as you aren’t stumbling down the aisle, I can’t be mad.” She smacked her lips together in pleasure, thumb brushing against the tie. She laughed, charmed and happy and so looking forward to their day. “Everyone’s going to get drunk and have a great time, and even if they don’t? Let’s not let it ruin our day.” Her mouth dipped down, and she hid it behind another sip of her drink, the warm fuzziness making it so much harder to not ask him to just take her home. “Yeah,” she agreed, sighing. “I’m kind of dreading it, too, y’know. As happy as I am. What if he doesn’t really want to be there after all? Even after everything he’s said?”
Eddie rolled his face in her hand, rumbling at the scratch of nails over his skin and gave her a dazed, dark look. “Climb on my lap. If you get too loud, I’ll let you bite me.” He wasn’t kidding, even if he knew there wasn’t going to be any public displays of sexual affection tonight. Maybe he’d take her to the other bar on the Citadel that turned a blind eye to that sort of thing once they needed to spice things up. Right now? He felt lucky if she could sleep with him at all without one of them freaking out.
The moment was over, though and Eddie ran his fingers through his hair, trying to smooth out that one rogue curl that flopped forward despite his efforts. “I want to remember the wedding, for better or for worse. I’ll be too drunk off loving you to need any real booze.” He opened his arm up for her to crawl into so she could hug his side, not happy with any kind of distance between them.
The subject of Bruce was a sore one and he hated the fact that he was upset at the Dark Knight at all. “Honestly? That’s the only thing that’s going to ruin my day.” Eddie took another sip of his drink and relaxed. Yes relaxed. Even though the subject at hand was a tense one for him, it was hard for him to stay tense through this door. He was happy and all the pressures of Gotham were far, far away. “He hasn’t said shit to me. I’m going to try and talk to him one more time before the wedding and see how that goes. Either way? I don’t know if anyone wants to see him there. Dick told me he friendzoned him, Selina gets heart broken just thinking about him and who knows how awkward it’s going to be when Bruce and Damian see each other for the first time since he’s been back?”
She let the moment fall away, knowing that they would have plenty of opportunities once they felt more comfortable and confident with each other. It was going to be a road until they were well enough for any of that kind of dirty playfulness they had before Earth-3 and even moreso during that long, bloody war that could have torn them both to pieces. But, they had what they did for now, crawling into his arm and wrapping an arm around his back while her other rubbed his chest, and she laughed quietly. “Oh, I’ll make sure you remember it. I’ll remind you every day. I’ll make you describe how pretty you thought I was, or how it felt dancing to our first dance, or how happy it made you to see me walking down the aisle towards you?”
She peppered his jaw with feather-light kisses, and then pulled back to look into his eyes, frowning a little. “I know, baby.” She sighed heavily. Bruce, for better or worse, was like Stephanie’s father, and here she was, having her heart broken by a man in that position again. She’d spent years and years trying to fight the heartache that Arthur Brown carved into her chest at a young, tender age. Bruce, despite his promises to be there and to walk down, was creating a fissure between everyone in Gotham. She was trying so very hard to give him the benefit of the doubt, but here was the evidence building against him. Slighting Eddie, not even coming to see Damian, hurting Dick enough for him not to even consider him his own father.
“So, what should we do?” She rubbed his chest again, still looking into those puppydog browns. “What do we do about him? I want him there, but it’s getting harder and harder to defend him or to support him when he’s tearing the rest of us apart.” Said like a girl who had lost her own father too many times to count, both in this Gotham and on Earth-3, and now she might just lose another to his own demons again.
He kissed her blonde hair, right on the top of her head and brushed his nose back and forth as if he were appreciating how soft and tangled and lovely it was for the first time. Her hand on his chest felt perfectly warm and his heart beat a little harder into her palm. Eddie brushed his fingers over her cheek and looped a golden curl around his finger with a playful, harmless tug. No, he decided. He didn’t want her to go. He was going to be heartbroken when she did. Was that what they needed? A little more aching for each other before the big day? Why? When she was his own universe. Gotham wasn’t home the way it used to and this wonderful space age world couldn’t be either. But, Stephanie? She was home. She was comfort and happiness and everything a Gotham kid didn’t know a thing about when they were growing up. Maybe it was boring and maybe they were supposed to be tearing each other’s clothes off on top of a skyscraper every night, but those supposed tos always got in the way, didn’t they?
“We’re supposed to be strong for him.” Eddie said wisely and kissed her nose when she looked up at him. All needling affection and sweetness he couldn’t hide anymore. “We’re supposed to be glad he’s there at all. We’re supposed to not worry about our friends that will hurt just because he’s there. Selina won’t stick around if she can help it. The birds will sulk and I don’t know if he’ll waste two words on me.” He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Eddie knew he was being bitter and angry over nothing. He knew Bruce was doing his best to not hate every single person from Gotham. But, Eddie knew it was past that now. “Gotham isn’t Gotham anymore. It’s more like Bludhaven than anything else. This world we built got lost, somehow. And, all of us are going to start running to places that remind us of home. Bruce? Should just stay with his Italians and his ghostly, insane girlfriend.”
“Heeyyy,” she said with a conspiratorial voice and narrowed eyes, wrinkling her nose in that way he loved as he tugged on a blonde curl. As if it were the most offensive thing he had ever done to her. In his arms, in this foreign door, on that planet that she barely understood, she felt more comfortable and at home than she’d been in months. Eddie would always do that. However cheesy that was, home was wherever he was going to be. That was why despite her possibly missing Gotham (though she wasn’t even sure about that), she was going to follow him to this damn space door and live here as long as he wanted and needed. Gotham might not always be there, and neither would this futuristic world, but Eddie? Her husband? He would be.
She smiled up sweetly at him, just a little tipsy and definitely punch drunk on her riddled man. Her hand continued to rub his chest, and she reached up to nip on the tip of his chin before frowning. “I’m trying to be. I think we’re both trying to be. But it makes me kind of mad, baby, that he’s not being a good friend to you or coming to even see Damian. I don’t even know what’s going on with him and Dick, and I wouldn’t want to touch Selina and Bruce’s relationship with a fifty foot pole at this point.” She stopped rubbing his chest to reach up and smear some of the rogue purple lipstick off of his mouth, then tracing the curve of his lip with her thumb. She drew quiet for a moment, thoughtful blues drawn in just a little as he called Gotham Bludhaven. It felt like a fucking cuss word to compare the two of them, and she looked at him with a tiny mingling of offense and confusion. But, she knew he was right. She goddamn knew it.
“I miss it, Eddie.” She pushed her thumb in his mouth so he’d bite it. “I miss that old Gotham we’ve almost forgotten about. I miss the ones where we grew up in. I fucking miss Earth-3 because that feels more like home most days than anything in this city.” Steph hated herself for admitting it, but it was true. That warzone still felt more like the semblance of what their lives should be than this bland, bland city with no Bat and all the color sucked dry from it. “And I know I shouldn’t be saying that that warzone was home, but it was. I want this, I want here and now and this safety we have. But I miss it.,” she trailed off with a sigh. “What if we never find a right fit?”
There was a hint of a smile as she brushed her thumb along his lip, enjoying the sensation of sparkling booze and her touching him too much to do anything but give her one of those smarmy, turned on looks she knew like the back of her hand. He watched her blue eyes as she worked through the dynamics of their friends, their family (Gotham was his family now, Eddie realized) and kissed her thumb. “I hate that our lives revolve around him. They always have, ever since the beginning, haven’t they?” Eddie said against her thumb, imagining the swirls of a fingerprint sticking to his lips in leftover lipstick purple. He decided he wanted her to mark more of his body. If he could? He’d fill more spaces with tattoos that proclaimed inside jokes and her and love wherever he could.
He bit down on her thumb with a grrrwwrrr just as she showed that flash of shock for calling their home Bludhaven and smirked when he saw that silent agreement that was stuck in her throat. He listened to her talk and nodded with everything she had to say. Earth-3 felt like home. They carved out a place to love each other in the chaos. That was home. He didn’t respond at first. No, Eddie felt bad for such an insult to their home, their blood, and so he pushed his lips in a messy attack of kisses all over her hand. He grabbed her pinky with his teeth and bit down a little harder to make her squeak. A reminder that he was there that even if they couldn’t find home, he’d always be her Eddie. Mischievous and trouble and loyal beyond any man she had been with would be.
With a kiss to her pinky as an apology to the hurt finger, he leaned his head back against the couch and hummed thoughtfully. “Gotham is run by the mobs. There’s no Batman. There’s no rogues. To save it we’d have to take on the Falcones, something I can’t do if I want to have a family. The only way the mob goes down is through blood. Through guys like Joker who want to bleed them into nothing. I’m a bad, bad man, but I’m not a killer. There’s no way to fix it without wrapping ourselves up in it. And, I’m not doing that. I want to be a family man. I want to come here and feel like the Riddler. I’m too old and too fucking happy to try and save Gotham from itself.”
He earned himself the flash of a sad smile as he kissed her thumb. Yes, their lives had always revolved around them. Even on Earth-3, when they were both missing home, it wasn’t necessarily just the city, but the people as well. It was Harley’s blonde pigtails and bright smile, and the Bat’s brooding, awkward scowl, and all those people that inhabited their apartment building. The colorful personalities that interwove into she and Eddie’s lives like they were meant to. “Well, to be fair, my life revolves around you,” she countered with that small smile, knowing full-well what he actually meant and circumventing around it anyway. And it was true. Gotham might be her compass often, but Eddie was her entire universe.
Steph burst into a round of quiet giggles at the attack of affection, broken by that surprised noise when he bit down hard on her pinky. A quiet chorus of owwwws to needle him into kissing the places that hurt. She smiled easily as he did, placated and comforted in his arms and with his affection, and maybe she shifted a little to be closer into his lap. Unabashedly in love with her fiancé and brain buzzing at his proximity and the booze. She trailed kisses on the other side of his jaw before burying her face into his neck as he leaned back. She inhaled his cologne, that sweet, city slicker scent she loved so much, and she sunk her teeth into the side of his neck, just barely. Just a tease, a little punishment, enough for a hiss of pain too before pulling back.
“I don’t want to get involved in that. Not right now. I can’t.” And wasn’t that selfish? But goddamn was it fucking true. Stephanie was aware of that. There was no way she could get back on the streets anytime soon, and to take down the mob? Oh, she didn’t know if she had it in her. The mob was always a softspot for her, and Eddie knew that. He could see it in her frown. “I want to have our family and live the goddamn lives we deserve. And yeah, I want my fucking cowl back, but I can’t do that right now. I can’t, and I don’t want to either.”
He made a pleased noise when she bit his neck, low and threatening to pay her back for it. When she pulled away? He almost tugged her back, fingers holding onto the fabric of her dress as if they were trying to find a way past. “I know, baby, I know.” Eddie hated talking about the mob with her and he had quit the info broker business partially because it made him bedfellows with every mob in the city. Out of respect for her, for their future kids, he didn’t want any part of that. Here? He didn’t belong to a mob, he wasn’t even an info broker. This was space and he did what he wanted.
“So, in conclusion, the people around us are a mess and we’re going to get married in the eye of that storm.” Eddie tried to lighten the mood, looking down to kiss her gently before leaning his head back against the couch again. “Fuck it.” He murmured and said it again to make himself mean it. “Fuck it, baby. I’ve got plenty to be thankful for. Two months ago, would you imagine Selina would agree to even coming to our wedding?” Eddie sat up, clearly entering a nerdy, excitable tipsy stage. “I love her. I do! She’s terrible and doesn’t understand basic language sometimes, but I love her because she’s one of us. She’s got a better heart than I could ever hope to have. Harley isn’t following the Joker around anymore! She can be there without a permission slip from Arkham! I love her, too. I love Frank and his family and the pets and the fact Bruce is even going to be there. I love that your family, most of them, can get over the fact that I’m the Riddler to be happy for you. I love that we’re friends with fucking Wonder Woman and Superman like it’s no big deal.” Eddie looked at her, big brown eyes wide. “And, baby I love you. I’m not fucking wallowing anymore. I’ve been doing it for months and now that I’m here, now that you and me are getting married? I’m done with that.”
She smirked up at him as he dug into her dress like he wanted it gone, fingers twisting into the lapels of his blazer and tugging it juuuust a little bit. She just couldn't help herself. After days of reflection and loneliness away from him, she couldn't keep her damn hands off of him, and if they were in that shiny new apartment? Oh they probably wouldn't have had this conversation at all. She wanted to forget about the mob, forget about a Gotham practically in ruins, forget about all of the problems rearing their ugly heads as their wedding approached. She only wanted him, him, him. In that moment, nothing else mattered or could make her happier than Eddie Nashton, especially a happy one.
So the sudden, tipsy rambling was a welcomed breath of fresh air, and she giggled messily as he proclaimed his love for all the good things they had. She tried to shush him, affectionately reaching to cover his mouth but not actually stopping his declarations. Because she loved all of them, too. “I love you, too,” she chimed in with a laugh, so charmed by him, sitting up so she could slide into his lap. “I love you, and I’m so glad you’re finding things that make you happy. I don’t care if we wind up living in every single fucking door in this damn hotel. As long as I have you, and as long as we have good things like our friends and family, I don’t fucking care.” Their wedding could be a disaster. Their friends could start a goddamn Jets vs Sharks kind of fight (hopefully with the snapping, of course). Goddamn ninjas could come raining from the sky, and Steph realized that things were going to be okay. They did have good things. Like in that bleak warzone, they managed to find good things in the darkness.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and peppered his face with kisses, glances of lips across his cheeks and his chin and his forehead as her hands smoothed through his hair to muss it up. Her breath smelled like bubblegum booze, and her cheeks were pink. “I love you. I love that my baby brother is back. I love my therapist and the friends I made in the hospital, and I love starting to feel strong again. I love our girls, and I love the girls we’re going to have.” She smiled down at him, tugging on that loose curl before her fingers dragged down his jaw. “I love the girls in our apartment building. I love our friends, I love that I get to marry you soon. I even kind of dig this weird ass city you dragged me to.”
Eddie wrapped his arms around her, delighted by her joining in on proclamations and fought for more kisses between words. Just having her in his arms felt like novelty after over a month of being apart and he couldn’t be upset anymore if he tried. He had his girl, he had his mind and soon they were going to get everything they wanted. Gotham? Might as well be a sinking ship, but they’d get over that, too. “Yeah, you do.” Eddie said to all of the above and kissed her hard, pulling her closer until she was flush up against him. There was always that lingering fear in the back of his mind that pushing her for affection like this would trigger something in her, something that would have him in retreat in a way she’d never, ever want. But, they were drinking and talking about love and their lives and god he just wanted her.
He hummed at the sweet taste of bubblegum on her tongue. “Stephanie Nashton.” He whispered with a smile and kissed her again, hands roaming around her body like he was making sure to touch all his favorite parts before she pushed him away. “Would you like to go gamble with your husband?”
She rumbled out something pleased and wanting into his mouth, slide of her tongue teasing his and so blatantly wanting to do nothing but make him take her to that new apartment. Her heart hammered in her chest, and he could feel it against his, and she swallowed hard as he pulled her flush against him. She looked at him with a lusty, drunken sort of desire that he probably hadn’t seen since they arrived. Hands sliding down his chest with a suggestive rock of her hips in his lap. Sure, she wasn’t exactly sure where that threshold was for her anxiety when it came to them, but she wasn’t particularly scared of him. She wasn’t scared of him at all. She felt safer here in his arms than she had in a long, long time.
But, Stephanie Nashton (could she really go back to Brown after all this? Even for a week?), oh she grinned when he murmured her married name. She wanted to hear that over and over and over again for the rest of her life. “I would love to go gambling with my husband. Let’s see if your wife can spend all the money you have in this door, Eddie Nashton.” She kissed the corner of his mouth, smoothing her hands over his shoulders and sliding down to grab his hands and bring them up to hold them against her chest. “I love you. Marrying you is going to be the best day of my life.”
Eddie’s eyes were heavy with want, but there was something there, as if he recognized her in a way he just hadn’t before. Every time she looked comfortable in his arms or returned that need with a rock of her hips and pull at his tie, Eddie saw the woman he fell in love with. When she was in the hospital, sometimes he didn’t believe her when she said he made her happy or she wanted him. It was stupid, he knew it was, but rejection was an easy thing to imagine and wear like a shield. That was gone and in its place was the feeling in his chest that things were going to be okay. That they’d figure things out and grow together because that’s what they did.
“I love you, too. I’m lucky, I’m so fucking lucky you found me.” Eddie squeezed her hands with his and pressed his forehead against hers. Found me. He said it like a riddle she’d dismiss right away. One she’d insist was the other way around. But, to him it wasn’t. Stephanie found him before anyone else even thought to look.
He kissed her, soft and loving like they were practicing for the wedding and then pulled away. “Okay, let me show you how varren racing works...”