Evie Narrative! Who: Evangeline "This is Fine" Sablier Where:Hell Costco When: On the 3rd of July What: Did you hear me? COSTCO. ON THE THIRD. OF JULY. Warnings:COSTCO on the THIRD of JULY
It reminded her of being arrested, standing in line, having her picture taken, being handed a card, being shuttled through the masses into a grey walled warehouse, except instead of cellblocks there were aisles and aisles of computer printers and food processors and tubs of pretzels and cases of beer. The riots were still there, but they were fought with glares and passive aggressive cart bumping. Thank God Daisy wasn't here to see this.
She had her list, it was insane, in hand and tried to make out some rhyme or reason to the stacks upon stacks of jeans mixed in with the lawn furniture. Why were they selling underwear and trampolines in the same aisle next to the books and liquor and avocados? Oooh free sample. Yes she would like more than one thank you very much. She watched, while she ate her third gourmet all natural gluten free vegan bagel bite, a demonstration for a food processor that literally pulverized anything. Why they named it after a vibrator she had no idea. But she knew for sure there was only one magic bullet she was letting near her vagina and it wasn't the one currently crushing ice in front of her. Her mind was a treasure trove of weirdness.
She wandered further down an aisle picking up tubs of detergents, wet wipes, and toilet paper. It was quieter over where she was, lightbulbs, tennis rackets, golf clubs and baseball gloves. She wandered closer to the bread, where she had five specific instructions on breads to get and things began to get a bit rowdier. Not scary, just noisier. She watched people reach for loaf after read something on the back and put it back in disgust. They'd peruse and look for words like whole grain and look on in horror when she grabbed for things that said "buttermilk" and "potato." "butter top wheat" and "cinnamon raisin."
She rounded a corner, casually grabbed a dozen chocolate muffins and a dozen more almond poppyseed, and scooted as far away from there as she could before she hit a traffic jam. The meat. It was cold, either from the refrigerator section or the ice in people's hearts, she didn't know. People were angrier here, fighting over bits of bison and filets of salmon like bears in the wild.
She was small, but her cart was cumbersome and she'd be in the thick of it if she took it with her. Though if she left it she risked losing it forever, and having to start all over. She needed a game plan. There were three chicken picker through-ers, five pork shoulder rubbers, and a guy buying all the ribs and sausages standing between her and the bacon, ground beef, and strip steaks - she could grab the chicken slyly from where she stood and she did just that while she had the chance. But the rest of it. Someone knocked into her cart - she was hesitating too long...Then, like a waft of hope breezing through the meat aisle it happened. The scent hit their noses - barbecue. Free samples. The sea parted before her and like Moses she...Got her meat.
But nothing. Nothing could have prepared her for what she found in the frozen food aisle. She found herself trapped almost immediately. People used their children as weapons and she suddenly regretted leaving Daisy behind. She half wondered if her only hope was to abandon her cart and climb out. But then she'd have to start all over or return empty handed. Her quest failed. She couldn't do that...She doubted the free samples would do much for this crowd, for some reason all they were giving away in this aisle was vitamin water. She didn't know why - some people just wanted to watch the world burn.
She pulled out her phone and contemplated texting someone for back up. Eddie could help. That Golden Retriever at the firehouse could help. She could call in a bomb threat and help herself. So many options.