InsaneJournal

"Bobby thought it was pretty great," Claire pointed out quietly. "He even told Crowley thanks. Which... seemed like a pretty big deal. And Castiel seems to be taking the whole thing pretty well. He had just enough... angel, or whatever you want to call it, to take out Pestilence." She cast a sideways glance at Sam. "Saved both you and Dean. Which, next time you two decide to take on the embodiment of disease? Do yourself a favor and, I don't know, carry shots of antibiotics or something. Because that was just..."

She stopped herself. She'd sworn, when she'd sat down to watch the show, that she wouldn't pass judgment over anything that might happen. The Sam that was here wasn't the Sam doing any of that stuff. It wasn't fair, to hold him accountable for any of it. But still. It had been a pretty dumb plan. And she knew all about dumb plans, thank you very much.

"Anyway," she continued, switching her train of thought. "Csatiel had a moment where he said he felt pretty useless. Only, he said it to Bobby. So there definitely wasn't much sympathy, which I think worked out better, really. And yeah, I learned about Adam. He, um..."

This was the tough part. The really serious stuff. With a sigh, she unscrewed the cap on her beer and took a drink. She might not be able to get drunk, but it gave her a few seconds to figure out how best to word what she had to say next. Her gaze went to the bottle, fingers picking absently at the label, as she spoke.

"You told Castiel about your plan to say yes to Lucifer. He said that he didn't think it was all that crazy, but that you needed to know a few things before you did it. One of them was that you'd have to drink way more demon blood than you ever had before. And the other..." Here it was. No backing out now. She swallowed and looked back to Sam.

"Adam is Michael's new vessel, Sam. Which means, if you do say yes and you can't get control long enough to jump... that showdown is going to happen and the world is going to end in the process."

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Claire's heart went out to him and, almost without thinking about it, she slid her hand along the wall and grasped one of his lightly. Squeezing it a bit, she turned so she was facing him. "Hey," she said softly, "look at me. Castiel isn't the only one that thinks you can do what you have to do, Sam, okay? By the time you and he and Bobby stopped the mass production of the Croatoan - I think that's what it was called?" She shook her head. It didn't matter. Back to her point. "Bobby was convinced you could do it too. And so am I. Not that my opinion matters much, I'm sure, but... you're not all darkness. You're a good man and, when push comes to shove, I know you'll do what's right. So does Castiel, and now Bobby."

She paused, then swallowed before adding, "And... Death knows it too. He pretty much said you were the only one who could stop Lucifer in fact. Even made Dean agree to let you, before he gave up his ring."

Okay. Probably not the best way she could have told him that part of things, but it was done now. All she could do was wait for his reaction while simultaneously trying to ignore the fact that she felt a little too comfortable holding his hand.

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It wasn't fair that Sam's relief and happiness had to be tempered by what had apparently been a very unusual occurrence. Granted Claire understood that most entities who were evil didn't typically act the way Death had but... she honestly didn't think Death really was evil. He was just Death. As old as God, possibly older - and she was still having a hard time wrapping her brain around that - and pretty much fed up with being Satan's lapdog. Could anyone really blame him? The guy was someday going to reap God himself, and he was spending his time wiping out cities just because Lucifer said so.

Not that she was going to share her opinions on the matter right here and now. She was there to tell Sam what had happened, not go off on some tangent about how everyone really was giving a freaking Horseman a bad rep. So she simply nodded, biting absently at her lip before replying.

"Well, first he gave him some pizza. Then they talked. Apparently, Death isn't all that happy with Lucifer keeping him on a chain. So he told Dean he'd tell him how to re-trap Lucifer and would hand over the ring, but that you were the one who had to make Lucifer jump. You were the only one who could. He didn't think so, he knew so. And Dean had to agree." She paused again and swallowed.

"So Dean did and Death handed over the ring and what he called the instruction manual. Then later, Dean told Bobby he'd lied and wasn't about to let you do it." She sighed softly. "Which is when Bobby went to bat for you." Her brow furrowed a little.

"And that's pretty much how it ended."

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It wasn't fair. It just plain wasn't fair. Yes, Claire knew that life wasn't fair. She knew that her idealistic views of the world were just that. A pipe dream that was nice to think about but never really worked out that way. However some part of her - the part that was still filled with hope and refused to let the harsh reality of life completely destroy that hope - was all but screaming at just how wrong it was. Sam felt bad for what he'd done. He wanted to make amends. He admitted his mistakes and took full responsibility for his actions. Even more so than he was probably responsible for, really. Yet he still had to do this horrible thing that might end badly anyway. He had to do something that no one should have to do and because why? Because it had been decided eons before that that's how it was? Whatever happened to free will? Whatever happened to a kind, caring, loving God who helped people through their problems no matter how big?

She knew she was being ridiculous. Getting angry at God wasn't going to change anything. Hell, getting angry period wasn't going to change anything. But she couldn't help it. Here she was, someone who couldn't die, who could probably help in some way in Sam's reality, and all she could do was sit back and watch - literally just watch - as life dealt someone she considered a friend a hand that wasn't only unfairly stacked but was like holding a bunch of Uno cards when you were playing poker.

"You've been doing the right thing, from what I can see," she finally spoke. Her forehead was creased, eyebrows drawn together as she peered up at him. His hand felt warm against hers. A way to center herself, remind herself that he was still here and wasn't going through all of the stuff back home. Thank God for small favors, apparently.

"And yeah. Based on the... I don't know, previews or whatever, that's what you're going to do." Her stomach churned at what she'd seen and she ducked her gaze. All but giving herself away that she hadn't liked what was coming next week, yet she couldn't help it. "You... um... you're having this conversation with yourself in the mirror, after you said yes. Then you were facing off with Dean." A really beaten up, bloody, and half-dead looking Dean.

No way in his world, hers, or this one was she going to tell him that, though.

Looking back up at him, Claire tried to find some words that would help. Something. Anything. However she knew there wasn't anything she really could say. 'Sorry you're going to have to trap yourself in eternal torment just to save the world' really didn't cut it.

"He's not going to leave you there," she finally stated. "Dean, I mean. And Castiel. Bobby. None of them are going to leave you there to rot, Sam. They'll figure out a way." She didn't know that for sure. No one really knew that for sure. But she had to hope because, if not, what the hell was the point?

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"I might just take you up on that," she stated in reference to his offer to watch the videos of her life. "I guess we're... off season or something right now, since there haven't been any new ones, but considering the state things were in when I left, I'm not sure I'll be able to sit through it all once they start up again." There was a touch of worry that they'd never start up again, but she pushed that aside for now. Instead she focused on his next question.

What Claire really wanted to do, truth be told, was keep on hugging him until her overwhelming desire to cry had passed. However not only would that be a little intrusive, but she also wasn't sure just when that urge was going to leave her. If ever, really. Still mentally bemoaning the unfairness of it all, she took a second to snap herself out of it and make her decision. And although her heart still felt as though it was breaking, she offered him a small smile.

"Well, I have beer, it's a nice night, and no offense to my roommates but... I think I'd rather stay here, with you." The last bit was spoken almost shyly as she peered up at him through her lashes and worried that she might have overstepped some sort of boundary by saying it. Unwilling to look at him in case that was precisely what she'd done, she moved to the steps and sat down.

Then she changed another glance up at him and patted the spot beside her.

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Claire's smile was both sincere and sweet as Sam sat down beside her. Taking a drink off her own beer, she glanced out at the area in front of them as he spoke. She considered his words as she swallowed, then looked over at him. "Honestly?" she replied. She shook her head. "Not really. I mean, it's great and everything, but I think after a while I'd almost get bored."

She frowned a bit and flashed him a slightly self-deprecating grin. "That probably sounds a little crazy, huh? I mean, here I am, the girl that so desperately wanted to be nothing but normal. And now here's my chance... sort of, anyway... and all I can think is, okay, when is the crazy going to really start?" She sighed, shook her head, and took another drink.

"This, though," she admitted after a second with her eyes trained on the bottle in her hand, "this is nice." She looked back up at him with a soft smile that left no room for doubt what she was talking about.

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Claire's stomach did a small flip-flop at his words. She didn't have much experience with guys. She hadn't ever dated in a really traditional sense. She wasn't sure of the subtleties, didn't know the ins and outs, and had no concept of how to casually flirt without sounding completely lame or downright desperate. Yet as she sat there on the stairs, there was one thing that she did know with absolute certainty.

She liked Sam Winchester. She didn't just like him as a friend. She liked him. She liked spending time with him. She liked seeing him smile. She looked forward to talking with him and enjoyed every moment they'd spent together thus far. Even when they had discussed things that weren't easy to talk about, she had wanted to be there with him, talking about those things. Confiding in him things that she had never confided in another person before. Ever. To put it simply, she had a crush and no matter how much she might try to ignore it, it clearly had no intention of going away anytime soon.

The only problem was, she had no idea what to do with this realization. She wanted to think that he liked her too, but she couldn't be sure. She also didn't want to risk being wrong and make some move he would rebuff. That was a humiliation that she'd never live down and one that could possibly cost her their friendship. So rather than being bold and brazen, Claire simply opened her mouth to make a complete subject change.

"Oh my God, you're Sam Winchester!"

Okay. That wasn't her voice. Claire frowned, and blinked, and her gaze cut up and across the walkway in time to see a girl who looked to be about her age making a mad dash toward them. Her eyes were wide and she was smiling broadly. Pausing at the bottom of the stairs, the girl began to virtually squeal with excitement.

"I don't believe it! They said you were here but I hadn't seen you yet! I love you! You're amazing!" As the girl continued to babble on about just how wonderfully, awesome, and perfect he was, Claire felt her irritation skyrocket. Technically speaking, as a member of the security staff, she could intervene. However she didn't want to jump the gun, so to speak, so she instead glanced to Sam to see how he best wanted to handle the situation.

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For a split second, Claire thought the girl was going to listen because, for a split second, she actually stopped talking long enough to look almost vaguely surprised. However apparently the girl decided that Sam wasn't being serious because she gave a soft laugh and roll of her eyes, before moving closer to the stairs where they were sitting.

"It's okay," the girl assured him. As she spoke, Claire slowly and quietly rose to her feet. She was mostly ignored as she moved down the stairs until she was nearly at eye level with the guest. She made no move to move past her but instead stood there, scarcely able to believe what she was hearing.

"I don't expect you to agree, even if he does totally deserve it. Well, he actually deserved to be left in Hell in the fir-"

Claire wasn't sure what the girl was going to add. Frankly, she didn't care. As soon as the words had registered she just... reacted.

Hand balled into a fist, she swung out and connected with the girl's nose. There was a satisfying crunching sound as bone gave way - both in the nose she'd hit as well as Claire's own hand. The girl stumbled backward, eventually losing her footing and hitting the ground with a thud. For a split second there wasn't any sound at all, then the guest let out a shriek of pain. Claire, meanwhile, held her hand out to the side and felt the telltale tingling of bones mending and the busted skin across her knuckles quickly healing.

"One more word," Claire said in a hardened tone as she purposefully stepped in front of Sam, "and I swear to God I'm going to break more than just your nose. Now go."

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