Re: Boathouse: Hugh & Atticus
Hugh laughed, and took a sip of his coffee and nodded. "You know, I used to think I didn't have any interest in anyone staying on my arm after the event was over, but maybe someday - woman or man, I'm not overly particular so long as they want to stay there," he mused. "In the meantime, it's a position for friends, or someone who needs the publicity," his eyes twinkled. "Assuming I ever get to the red carpet experience after all, and hey, if I do, maybe I'll take my girl," he glanced down at Heart fondly. The dog glanced up at Hugh, then over at Atticus, and then put her nose back down on her paws with a sigh as if she wouldn't be bothered with red carpets.
He'd spent most of his life thinking he didn't want or need anyone particular, and in the past few years that thought had been turned upside down but not because he'd found that person who wanted to stay and he thought he maybe was beginning to realize that he might want it, but he couldn't force it either. And that he'd rather not have the someone staying if they weren't right, if they didn't want to be there as much as he wanted them there. In that case it was better not to have anyone, maybe still lonely in a way, but less of a jab at his confidence, perhaps.
"Maybe." Hugh shifted, set the coffee on his knee and considered Atticus seriously as he thought about the train, the things that had happened before. "I'll say this, I didn't mind this particular thing, and I didn't mind the first Halloween either - I was a prince looking for the princess he hoped to meet," he shrugged. "It's like me, but not, and this time I was a schoolboy, Head boy at some fancy British boarding school I think. And it was fine, I wasn't bothered by the roles nor me losing myself in them. Nothing terrible happened either time, although I'm not certain anything of any import did either. The time we shared dreams - that was worse, because it was me, and it very much was my partner, and it was a forced intimacy that neither of us would have offered the other had we been given the choice, and I'd be perfectly happy if I never did that again, but the difference was that it forced an intimacy and knowledge of ourselves to each other. The other times - when you simply become someone else for a while - I'm not certain why there's so much dislike about it other than perhaps yes, a giving up of control, or perhaps just worry that others will think of you based on who you were in one of the scenarios...?" This Hugh wasn't certain about. It was obvious some people hadn't wanted it and disliked it tremendously, but he really hadn't. It had been fine. He shook his head, "He was not a teen age girl," Hugh laughed lightly.