Re: NYC: Hannah & Hugh
"I don't think it's wrong to be angry or mad," Hugh told her quietly after he too had asked for another cup of wine from the waitress. "I can understand why the person would ask you not to be mad, especially if they're a friend of Jamie's, which I'm assuming that they are, or he wouldn't have said something to them. But… It's something that has the potential to shift how people see you. And it impacts you if those perceptions shift, and it's not fair for you to not have control over when that happens."
He reached for the cup of water he'd been ignoring and took a sip of it wincing at the comments from her sister. He'd never woke up not truly being him, but he'd gone through shifting in people's expectations of him. It wasn't the same at all, but the emotion he suspected was the important piece and it always hurt when people didn't understand you.
"I'm glad that you don't think there will be trouble, and I hope that it isn't, for you, and for Jamie honestly too. I'm sure he had reasons for saying something, and you can't stuff the cat back in the bag, or whatever," he waved a hand, reached for the wine that had arrived.
"With your siblings though, and their reactions, I don't know. I think, from my own experience that it's always better for me to name the emotion, even if it's just to myself than to try to hide it. Trying to pretend that I'm nice, when I'm angry, or that I don't mind, when I do, it almost always ends up in badness down the road. It's okay to be hurt by Jamie's reaction or your sisters, or anyone's. Sometimes it helps me to adjust my expectations, which isn't to say that hurtful things don't happen and that people don't hurt me, but when I figure out what I can accept from those expectations and what I need to say something about, it helps me react more intentionally. I guess," he took a sip of the wine and sat it down.
"Has it gotten better at all since you told them? Besides this situation with Jamie?"