Re: log: adrian and ren - in the cottage
Ren watched Adrian move through the process. He looked thin and tired, and Ren couldn’t say that he loved what the Facility had obviously done to him. If anything, it made him angry, but Ren tried not to focus on that particular emotion. It wasn’t going to lead to anything well, and even if he’d not always agreed with his Uncle on the way to handle the magic he had, that particular lesson had also been proven true. Not that you ignored it, or felt shame about it – something his Uncle had sometimes made him do – but you didn’t need to focus it.
Ren wasn’t always a touchy feely sort of person. Strangers were, well, strangers, and you didn’t need to hug everyone in your vicinity to make them feel better. People should have their own space, but somehow that had never exactly held with Adrian. From the first time they met, Ren had felt drawn to him, and when he asked about the hug, the outcome was a given. Ren moved forward and wrapped his arms around the other man, offering firm support, which was easy enough simply given his sheer height and size. Particularly right now, Adrian was easily wrapped up in that embrace, and for a few moments Ren said nothing at all.
His mind threatened to run away with the rest of the information, but Ren pulled it back in, focusing instead just on Adrian’s presence. When was the last time he’d been hugged? And if he was struggling with everyone else around him – Ren understood at least what it felt like when the world was against you. He’d had enough of those moments in his life, and he also knew what a difference at least one person could make, so he focused in, maybe with some of his magic too, positive energy his Uncle would have called it. Ren would probably call it something different, but the end intention was the same: support Adrian.
“I was going to argue about everybody,” Ren returned wryly. “Because I’m not upset, but here’s a concept: you’ve had a terrible few weeks and you’re not at your best, and if they can’t see that, then maybe it’s not just on you.” Which wasn’t offered as an excuse, so much as an offering of hope, because Ren had definitely been through periods where he’d felt like he was fucking everything up, and putting all of the fault of that on him had rarely been the thing that snapped him out of it. He pulled back and looked at Adrian more seriously. There were things there, but he didn’t know if they were things they should start with. Truthfully, he wasn’t certain where to start.
“Alright.” He considered with his gaze still on Adrian’s face. “First off, this is like a no judgement zone, okay? There’re no wrong answers, it’s just what you think or feel right now. And what you think or feel about something is valid. It can also shift, god knows I’ve shifted my views all over the place on shit, so nothing here is a tie down, I won’t hold you to it, and you don’t have to hold you to it, you just talk, yeah? And be honest. Cause we can’t deal with stuff if you aren’t being honest to yourself, right. Seem fair? And I promise the same thing back. Okay? Like. I hate pretending fake bullshit, and it’s never done me a speck of good and I can’t imagine it would here either. Also, I sound like a fucking therapist, but I’ve had like no training outside of a gen psych class, so like, that’s my disclaimer