Re: [New Year’s Eve: Hannah & Jeremiah]
"You're really good at this," she said, all earnest and all truth. "You're really, really good at seeing in people and figuring them out, at understanding what they're feeling. A lot of people can't do that, and I think it's because they see inside themselves so much that they have trouble seeing outside." It was maybe not the clearest thing to say, the clearest thing to try to explain, but there was something about him that made talking to him so easy, and she so very much wanted to unravel and just let someone know everything that was happening with her. It was hard, hard, so hard to keep it buttoned in, and sometimes she thought maybe she would go really crazy from it.
She smiled at the image of him dancing in Mardi Gras beads. She could see it. She could close her eyes, and she could imagine it, and it was good, and it was him, and it fit just right. "You will," she said of him finding that one person, and she was no psychic, but she believed it. Heart and soul and whatever made her whir and tick, and she believed it.
"I have dark places," she told him truthfully. "Everyone always thinks I'm just sunshine, and they think I'm kind of stupid, and they think I'm not much but how I look. But there's more, and there's dark, and you might not like my shadows." She'd met so few people that realized there could be beauty in hurt, in scars, and in dark things. Everyone wanted sunlight, but Hannah knew that not all creatures were made for the sun's rays.
Si, Si, Si, Si. "Si needs a lot of help. It's hard," she said, tipping her chin up to look at his face. "It's hard when people need help, because I don't know that we ever can help. I think maybe people need to want it first, and you can't make anyone want anything, not really." It wasn't cheerful, and the clock would be striking 12 soon, but it was honest. Maybe that was all Hannah really wanted for the new year: Honesty.