InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Then how about marrying me?"

Dolores Jane Umbridge (kitten_kitsch) wrote in rent_asunder,
@ 2008-03-26 20:06:00

WHO: Dolores Umbridge, ~~Nymphadora~~ Tonks
WHAT: Dolores pays a visit to the Ministry
WHEN: 26 March, Midmorning
WHERE: The Ministry of Magic
RATING: Unrated as of yet
Complete

~ ~ ~
Dolores looked up at the Monument of Magical Might in satisfaction, enjoying the imposing shadow that it cast down upon the bustling wizards and witches going about their business in the Ministry. It was such a better symbol than that wretched old fountain that had used to stand there. She’d always hated it, despised the glorification of filthy inhuman beasts like goblins and centaurs. They weren’t like the house elves, who were intelligent enough to accept the natural dominance of the Wizarding folk over them. The blasted goblins and centaurs, especially the centaurs the rutting monsters that they were, always tried to rebel now and then, insisting that they had the same capacity for magic as Wizards. Laughable, that. Magic truly was might, and it was gratifying to no longer be forced to layer this truth in sugary lies, as upstarts like Dumbledore had insisted.

She’d decided to take a few days’ sabbatical from Hogwarts to tend to some business in the Ministry that she had been putting off. Firstly she would make sure that the Muggleborn Registration Committee knew about that Zeller girl who the Smith boy had stood up for. Dolores was certain that she was a Mudblood, and that Smith was simply behaving like a little fool in claiming that she was his cousin. The Committee would get to the bottom of that rather quickly. She was also planning on starting an investigation into the activities of that Chittock woman. Thinking that she could claim moral superiority over the Headmistress of Hogwarts and the High Inquisitor? Dolores would show her exactly who was in the right in this nation.

Nodding imperiously at several low-level functionaries that she recognized, Dolores made her way towards the lifts that lead deeper into the bowels of the Ministry. The Committee was still using some of the old courtrooms down near the Department of Mysteries, and she also needed to stop by Yaxley’s office at some point. The efficiency that dominated the movements of everyone around her filled her with a quiet delight – everything was certainly running much smoother than she’d seen it in decades. This was truly a new Golden Age for their civilization. Pressing a button on the wall she waited for the doors to the lift to open for her, glancing around her and enjoying how quickly people averted their gazes from her. Power was very sweet.

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kitten_kitsch
2008-03-28 03:12 am UTC (link)

Dolores felt an odd pang of nostalgia, hearing the Tonks woman call her 'Dori'. No one had called her that since Aunt Doreen had died, and she was rather perplexed to realize that she'd missed it. She smiled a little, uncustomarily warm, and then shook it off. She was certainly not friends with this lowblooded underling, and the Auror can't have meant to call her the name with anything resembling affection.

"It's so good to know that we will have competent people running the desks at the Ministry again," she commented, patting the Tonks woman on her arm. "I do hope you get over that little bug soon, my dear. I'm sure the Aurors would be completely lost without you."

The doors to the lift opened and Dolores gestured for Tonks to go ahead of her. "As for me, I'm here to attend to a few matters of business. I've an appointment with Mr. Yaxley, of course, and I also need to oversee some matters with the Muggleborn Registration Committee. After all, I am still the administrator, in addition to my duties as Headmistress and High Inquisitor." She smiled again, this time more as a predator. "There are some people who are still disloyal to the Ministry, as sad as it is, and they must be weeded out."

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adoranymphable
2008-03-28 03:31 am UTC (link)

Instead of the angry reaction Tonks was expecting at 'Dori', she was taken aback by the almost warm smile Umbridge gave her. Well, that was odd. Maybe she liked being called Dori. Tonks' stomach contracted when she realised how close that was to 'Dora', and for a moment she wondered if she were going to be sick all over Umbridge's shoes. Pity she was able to hold it in.

"You're too kind," said Tonks in the same sickly-sweet voice Umbridge was using. "I'm sure the others are just as competent as I am." After all, the country had already gone to hell. How competent could they really be? "I'm sure I'll get over it quickly, thank you. If history's to be believed, the only things that kill Blacks are other Blacks, not silly little illnesses."

Tonks limped heavily inside, wincing as she did so. Standing up for so long and moving around so much was quickly taking its toll, and she was beginning to daydream about the chair and desk and ice pack that awaited her upstairs. "You don't say? Mr. Yaxley? And how's he doing? I'm afraid I've been horribly out of the loop, being gone for the past few months." She tilted her head curiously again. "You're the Muggleborn Registration Committee, are you? I've heard only good things." Beaming as if she really was quite happy with the whole thing, instead of sick and disgusted and fed up, Tonks touched Umbridge's shoulder fondly, as if she were an old friend. "Have you registered yourself yet, Dori? Set a good example for the others and all? I've heard fantastic things about how those cases are being handled. But that's an awful lot to have on your plate all at once. Have you thought of spreading the work a bit, giving it to others to handle? It might be good for your stress, dear. You can't afford any more wrinkles around your eyes at your age, really."

Tonks nodded wisely, as if she wholly agreed. "Yes, yes, of course. Those who are not loyal to England surely are not fit to work for the Ministry. I agree whole-heartedly. After all, what does it say about this great country when all of our politicians are only in it for their own personal gain? Glory and money and fame is nothing without the satisfaction of knowing that one has done what is best for one's country and one's Ministry."

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kitten_kitsch
2008-03-28 03:49 am UTC (link)

Supressing a small sniff, Dolores was both amused and offended that the girl would think to call herself a Black. Not with a Mudblood father she wasn't. But saying that would undoubtably lead to a scene in the lift, and that would be unpleasant at this time of day.

"Mr. Yaxley is as well as can be expected, being burdened with the task of cleaning up the Ministry," she said, reaching up and grabbing one of those ridiculous flying paper things that some of the departments used to distribute memos before it hit her in the face. "It is quite the chore. But we all must work so hard to correct the errors that have been made in the recent past. I myself have so much to do up at Hogwarts, after the unfortunately lengthy reign of Albus Dumbledore. The ideas that man had about education..." She clucked her tongue sadly as she refolded the memo after reading it and set it back in the air. "In any case, I'm perfectly content with, as you say, having it all on my plate." She giggled once, for no reason but to punctuate the remark. "I haven't felt this alive in ages. What's one more wrinkle here or there to a woman of stature, such as myself?"

As the lift door opened to the Auror division floor, Umbridge stepped out and offered a hand to the Tonks woman. "My dear, you simply must let me help you to your desk. I insist upon it. After all, what is one more burden?" She smiled widely at her and tucked Tonks' hand into the crook of her elbow as she lead her out of the lift. "As for myself, I was the first to present the documentation of my blood purity to the Committee, of course. It's required for all employees of the Ministry, my dear. Even you were investigated. We must ensure our loyalty, each and every one of us. That is our true duty."

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adoranymphable
2008-03-28 04:23 am UTC (link)

"It's still a burden he took on willingly, is it not?" said Tonks sweetly. "It's nice to see someone stepping up for once. That is such a rare thing these days, wouldn't you agree? Too often it's those in power sending their servants to do their bidding for them. It's refreshing to see Yaxley taking responsibility for his own dreams."

Tonks smiled placatingly. "Ah, but one thing that cannot be denied is the witches and wizards who came out of Hogwarts while Dumbledore either taught there or was the Headmaster are some of the best this country has ever seen. No one is substandard." She gestured at Dolores. "You're a prime example of this, Dolores. You were certainly taught by Dumbledore, were you not? Would you consider yourself substandard?" Leaning in just enough to get a better look at Umbridge, Tonks squinted and promptly morphed her face to look exactly like hers, except with a few more subtle wrinkles that hopefully she wouldn't realise were extras. "This, dear, is hardly a face that will make your students respect you. They don't respect wrinkles, not anymore. And if you're not careful, in a few years you'll look like this." Again she morphed, this time into a hag that was certainly a very old version of Umbridge. "Take it from someone who's done loads of experimenting on the subject. While others may respect old men, they do not respect old women. That's why all of us strive to look so bloody young. Soon enough, you'll find yourself losing the respect of your colleagues, and no longer will you have any stature to wield." She smiled blandly and morphed back to the appearance she'd been using.

Her skin crawled at the thought of getting help from the Umbridge bitch, but Tonks really wasn't sure she'd be able to make it as far as her desk. It was on the other bloody side of the room, having been moved around several times, each time farther and farther away from the door. "Thank you," she said with a smile, although she really was beginning to wonder if she'd get sick on this horrid excuse of a woman. Taking a few steps that were perhaps faster than she ought to have taken, she winced and slowed down. It wouldn't do her any good if she pushed herself more than she was able to take just to get away from Umbridge. She'd probably insist on taking Tonks to St. Mungo's if that happened.

"Did you?" said Tonks with a surprised note in her voice. "Perhaps I heard wrong then, but I've heard from several sources that your papers are being questioned by the committee." Again she smiled sweetly. "It must just be a nasty rumour, so many people saying you're actually Muggleborn. I didn't believe it myself, of course, but I wondered if that was your true motivation - to help all of the Muggleborns who have been gifted with magic find their place in our world, having been successful yourself. It was quite an inspiring story." She eyed Umbridge silently, as if judging for herself whether or not she was really a pureblood, though she said nothing.

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kitten_kitsch
2008-03-28 04:39 am UTC (link)

Dolores had almost forgotten the wretched woman was a Metamorphmagus, and she held back a deep frown as she watched her face deteriorate in front of her. How dare she insult her so? "Now my dear," she said, her voice sickly sweet. "I rather think you're the last person to be the authority on appearance governing respect. After all, you change your look to suit each person you come across. No wonder you believe that appearance is what matters. I suppose I shouldn't expect anything more from someone who doesn't even really have a true face." She touched her own face, feeling the hard-etched lines in it, and smiled. "I earned my wrinkles, you see. And I assure you, it won't be long before all of my students learn to respect them." Her voice held a hint of steel, and she tightened her grip on Tonks' arm ever so slightly, leading her further down the hall.

"And as for my papers being questioned?" Dolores giggled loudly, waving her hand. "I do think that's possibly the funniest thing I've heard in a good long while. The stories you young people come up with these days are really quite laughable, Nymphadora." As if she would rise to such obvious and ludicrous bait. "No, I'm investigating how the Muggleborn came by their magic so that we may better understand how our society is being eroded away, and stop it." She gazed ahead of her, a look of utter conviction on her face.

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adoranymphable
2008-03-28 04:50 am UTC (link)

Oh, yes, Tonks had gotten to her, of that she was certain. Perfect. That made her day slightly better then. Instead of being insulted at her remarks, however, Tonks just grinned. "If I changed my appearance for everyone I met, I wouldn't be recognisable, would I? I change it when I need to, when the situation calls for it, but that's because after nearly thirty years of experimenting, I know how society reacts to different features. How it reacts to beauty. It's those who don't have any who insist that beauty doesn't matter." A low shot, but Umbridge had been asking for it. Even as she said it, however, her smile never once left her face. Partially because she was now aware of how easily she could bother Umbridge, and partially because she knew she was right. "Besides, I'd be a fool to not use such powerful gifts. But is that the latest rumour? That I don't have a real face? I had to have been born with something, wouldn't you say?" She grinned cheekily. "And it's a rather nice face, if I do say so myself. It's rather brilliant, knowing I never have to age." She felt Umbridge tighten her grip and smirked inwardly. "Every wrinkle I receive, I'll earn as well. Only difference is, I'll be able to hide them, because I know how other wizards will look down on me when I'm old."

With a sick jolt, she realised Umbridge was in full view of her wedding ring, but there was nothing she could do about it. Maybe, with any luck, she wouldn't notice. "I'm glad you think it's funny," said Tonks as genially as she could. "I hear it's a very serious offense, to forge documents claiming you're a pureblood when you're really not." She smiled again. "I doubt they'd tell you if you were being investigated, you know. Wouldn't want you to go and influence things, being the head of the committee and all, especially when the charges are so serious." Tonks laughed lightly, as if it were all one big joke. "Politics. Makes me glad I'm only a Ministry-owned trained killing machine, really."

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kitten_kitsch
2008-03-28 05:10 am UTC (link)

Uppity little bitch, the Tonks woman was. Dolores was well aware that she wasn't beautiful, and though she'd long ago ceased to desire beauty for herself it still stung to have an upstart like this woman call her ugly. Beauty really didn't matter; Mother had always said that it was obedience and loyalty that were the key to happiness. Eventually the Tonks woman would learn that. They all would in time.

She opened her mouth to reply to the latest dig, but stopped as she glanced down and saw the ring that glittered on the Auror's finger. Reaching down she seized the hand and drew it up close, turning it to the light. "Why my dear," she said. "This is a wedding ring. Well, I believe congratulations are in order! And to think that no one has heard of your happy news!" She looked about at all the employees of the Ministry that were glancing in their direction and smiled broadly at them, holding Tonks' hand up. "We have a new bride in our midst," she announced merrily, enjoying the discomfort that flashed across the woman's face. "Now you must tell me who your lucky husband is."

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adoranymphable
2008-03-28 05:40 am UTC (link)

Tonks fought to keep herself from showing any reaction when Umbridge did in fact notice her wedding ring. But it was an easy lie, she told herself in an attempt to stop her heart from pounding. Umbridge had no way of verifying anything.

"Oh, yeah, that was months ago," said Tonks in an offhanded voice. In reality, it hadn't even been two weeks. "He's a member of the Couer family." Couer, she was certain, was a relatively wealthy pureblooded family in southern France. "He was an old friend of my mother's, in fact. A bit older than me, but he's quite pleasant. Very much a gentleman."

There, she thought. Hopefully that would do it.

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kitten_kitsch
2008-03-28 05:09 pm UTC (link)

Dolores knew, somehow, that she'd struck a nerve with this. Most women couldn't wait to show off a wedding ring, she'd found over time. They loved to wave it in the faces of old maids like herself. Especially after the little tirade that the Tonks woman had delighted in, parading her beauty about like a red flag. Why wouldn't she have used this ammunition as well? It smelled fishy to Dolores, and she wasn't about to let go of it.

"Well my dear Nymphadora!" she exclaimed, still making as though to admire the ring. "How perfectly wonderful. I had no idea any of the Couer family were living in Britain at the moment. My own mother was friends with their matriarch a few years ago. I should call upon your new husband, catch up on old times. What was his name?" She smiled beamingly at the Auror, watching her face intently. If she did have a true face, then Dolores would see the truth etched upon it. She was sure of it.

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adoranymphable
2008-03-28 07:46 pm UTC (link)

Tonks would've yanked her hand back, if it wouldn't have made her fall flat on her face. Just the thought of Umbridge admiring her ring was enough to really make her sick. And maybe, she thought, vomiting wasn't the worst idea in the world. But she could do this. She could bullshit with the best of them. Moody had made sure of it in her training.

"Oh, no, he doesn't live in Britain," corrected Tonks with a look that implied Umbridge should've known better than to imply such a ridiculous thing. "He's still in France. It's part of the reason why my leave was so short - I missed England." She shrugged. "He doesn't want to move here, and given the current political unrest, I certainly won't make him, so I stay there as much as I can during the week, and usually all weekend. It's a nice arrangement. We haven't gotten sick of one another yet, at least." It was shocking how easy it was to lie about this, but more than that, Tonks realised this might very well be the explanation she could use to explain why she didn't live in her flat anymore. "Were she and your mother friends? That's brilliant, that is - didn't she die a few years ago? She's his great-aunt," added Tonks, a slight jab at Umbridge's age. "His name's Henri. Surely you must know him, given how close he was with his aunt." She smiled sweetly. "That's lovely, really - it's such a small world sometimes, isn't it?"

Shifting back in the conversation, Tonks winced again as she tried to move faster than she was able. "Really, Dori, you ought to get that whole nasty rumour checked out though. Wouldn't do anyone any good to have you kicked off the committee and arrested for fraudulent papers. I hear the penalty's rather severe these days."

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kitten_kitsch
2008-03-28 08:06 pm UTC (link)

"Oh my, yes it is," replied Dolores quite placidly, a tiny smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "After all, I instituted the penalty myself. I assure you, my dear, that the rumour, if it indeed exists, is exactly that. My mother was most well-known at the Ministry, though long before your time." She was perfectly content to agree with the girl's jabs at her age. Youth always believed itself to be more powerful, despite constant evidence to the contrary. Didn't the chits like this who worshipped Dumbledore remember exactly how old he had been before he finally died? As much as Dolores hated the man for his weak-minded policies, there was no denying that he had been most powerful, both in magic and in politics. "You needn't worry yourself so over my status. The Committee is well aware of the blood status of all its members, and assuring ourselves of the veracity of all Ministry employees is one of our highest concerns. Speaking of that..."

They had reached the Auror's department, and Dolores guided Tonks to her desk, helping her sit down. She took a quiet glee in acting the caring mother for the spiteful bitch, knowing that her own blood traitor mother was dead and that it must be aggravating her to no end to have Dolores play the role. "As I was saying," she continued, making no move to leave, "we make it a priority to keep up to date on the status of all Ministry employees. A directive held most dear by Mr. Yaxley, I assure you. So I must caution you, my dear, to be careful. Considering your own file has not been updated to reflect your new marital status. You really ought to produce the proper documentation of your wedding and of your husband's blood status, in order to assure your continued prominence of one of our most valued Aurors. I'll be sure to send you a reminder later today, as I will be updating the files. So many of them need my personal attention."

The girl's story seemed well put together, but it still smacked of lies to Umbridge. The Auror was good, she'd give her that, but they all underestimated her own ability to detect lies. Sixty years did not go by without having taught her more than a few signs, even on someone as wily as a Metamorphmagus. Dolores wasn't exactly certain where the lie was, but she would certainly find out. She moved to leave, stopped, and turned to face Tonks once more. "It's funny," she said with a small simper, as though apologizing. "But I can't really recall a boy named Henri in the Couer family. I'm sure it's simply just a trick of memory, being so aged and all." She giggled a little, and waved a hand. "Perhaps I'll write to his mother. All this conversation has made me nostalgic for old friends."

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adoranymphable
2008-03-28 08:51 pm UTC (link)

"I wouldn't dream of worrying about you, Dori," said Tonks pleasantly. "I'm well-aware of how capable you are of taking care of yourself, especially around magical creatures such as werewolves and centaurs." Another low shot, but if Umbridge was going to play dirty, then so was she.

Relieved when they reached her desk, Tonks accepted Umbridge's help as she sat down, knowing full-well that the only thing worse would be falling on her arse and requiring another hospital trip. The last thing she wanted was to have to spend a second more with this heinous cow. "I'll owl my husband right away and ask him for copies of the appropriate files," said Tonks cheerfully. That, at least, she knew could be forged. "The Ministry keeps me around for more than just my blood-status though, you know. My boss is rather fond of my abilities." She tapped the side of her nose. "They do come in handy quite often, you know. I doubt a silly little thing like me being a half-blood could ever convince him to fire me, especially given my powerful and influential lineage. There aren't many sane Blacks running around now, after all. Even when I was attacked earlier this year, he was nothing but kind and supportive." Even Tonks knew that that attack had been ordered by someone inside the Ministry, and as far as she was concerned, given Umbridge's history, she wouldn't put it past her.

On the verge of sighing with relief when Umbridge finally started walking away, Tonks damn near choked on that same sigh when she turned around again. Returning Umbridge's smile - being civil was so much fun! - Tonks made herself busy with the stack of paperwork on her desk, as if to silently dismiss her. "Are you certain we're talking about the same branch of the family?" she said sweetly. "From what he's told me, there are more than one. But Henri's mother died several years ago. It's something we have in common."

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kitten_kitsch
2008-03-28 10:09 pm UTC (link)

So the game was on, thought Dolores. As irritating as she was, the Tonks woman was at least very competent. It had been awhile since someone had challenged her like this, and Dolores found herself rather looking forward to the task of destroying the Auror bit by bit. The little shot about centaurs was low, but Dolores often reminded herself of her failure with the filthy halfbreeds for the very reason that it had been a failure. She had learnt from her mistake, and would not underestimate beasts like that again. Nor children. They were all little devils that would take any given opportunity to attack, so she would simply never give them one. The additional comment about werewolves though... that was perplexing. Dolores had never personally encountered a werewolf. It struck her as an odd thing to say... she would ponder on it more later.

"I'm most glad you'll update your file expediently," she said. "I'll be sure to put your case at the top of our priority, to make sure it gets out of the way quickly, of course. We wouldn't want to disturb your convalescence, now would we?" Another smile, watching the way the girl tried to take charge of her little office, tried to dismiss her with the appearance of having things to do. Dolores had been playing the bureaucracy game far longer than her, and however much Tonks might believe that she was in Yaxley's good graces, Dolores would always be in a stronger position. Stronger people than the Auror had underestimated Dolores before, and she had walked over them. "Speaking of disturbing your convalescence, I shall make it my personal duty to see that you aren't unduly disturbed today," she continued. "I shall come by to check on you every so often, take care of whatever needs you might have, hmm?"

She turned, not waiting for an answer, and almost went around the corner, then looked over her shoulder. "It's entirely possible that I've mistaken the family branch. I shall certainly look into it, my dear. Turrah." With that, she left, heading back towards the lifts and to her own office down in the bowels of the Ministry.

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adoranymphable
2008-03-29 01:02 am UTC (link)

Tonks was, admittedly, thoroughly enjoying herself. As much as she hated Umbridge to no end, the thought of getting to watch her mindlessly steer herself in the wrong directions was brilliant. Making her life miserable - yes, Tonks thought, that was possible, if the bitch was going to continue coming around.

"I appreciate that," said Tonks with a genial smile. "I would hate to have that sort of uncertainty hanging over me, giving my mother's poor choices." She silently apologised to her mother, something she did every time she had to insinuate that her mother's marriage to her father was something she shouldn't have done. But it was part of her cover, and as much as she might've hated it, it had to be said. At Umbridge's offer, Tonks felt her insides turn to ice. Having to deal with her on a regular basis - Tonks would've rather eaten her own liver. But if Umbridge was going to insist, then Tonks was more than willing to make her life a living hell every time she came around. "Oh, Dori, you're too kind. I appreciate it, and I look forward to your company." Already she was thinking of things that would 'need' to be done - memos and paperwork that had to be hand-delivered, rubbish bins of vomit that had to be discarded...she would get creative, and with any luck, eventually this heinous creature would decide it wasn't worth it to bother her.

"I'm sure that's all it is," said Tonks sweetly, giving her a little wave as she retreated. Already Tonks was thinking of the documentation she'd have to have forged - a wedding certificate, a family tree, a French birth certificate...it could be done, that much she was certain of. It would only take some time.

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