“He trained me.” What the fuck does that even mean? He’s trying to distract me. It’s working. I unzip his hoody and run my hands along the soft skin above his jeans. He moves a little hiking his shirt up. My hands slide under the thin cotton and touch the satin of skin. I move us together until I’m lying on top of him, his leg around my waist. I thrust my tongue into his mouth and press our bodies together, feeling his heat radiating through the denim. I open his fly and remove his jeans, never stopping our kiss.
~~~60~~~ He’s got my jeans off, and now he’s pulling at my shirt. I’ve used this type of distraction technique before. It doesn’t usually work this well. His mouth on mine and then it’s gone. I can’t help making a small sound of displeasure but he pulls my t-shirt off me quickly and then he’s back to covering my naked body with his clothed one. I don’t know when he put a condom on. I guess the distraction thing goes both way, but a moment later, he’s inside me. My mind is screaming a thousand things at once. “Stop.” He stops.
~~~61~~~ I’m holding most of my weight on my arms, pulling away from him but not out of him. His ankles are now just resting on my calves. I move to pull out but his hands on my back and press down, telling me he wants me to stay. His eyes are closed. “Open your eyes.”
He does, and they’re dark with desire and I see fear too. “Stop?”
He shakes his head.
He nods and I move slowly inside him. My hands on either side of his head, his body arching to take me deeper. He’s close. Me too.
~~~62~~~ I’m about to come. I bite my lip, and he runs his tongue along the line below my teeth. “I want to hear you come.”
I can’t believe I told him to stop this. I don’t want it to ever stop. He seems to understand. He’s no longer moving inside me. He’s whispering soft meaningless syllables into my ear. He’s kissing me gently, but the building pressure resides and then he starts moving again, this time with short sharp thrusts. I meet his every move with one of my own until I feel like we’re one being sharing a heartbeat.
~~~63~~~ I back off, just as he’s about to come. I grit my teeth against my desire to fuck him hard. When we’re both sweaty and his eyes are almost black with desire I put it into overdrive. I couldn’t have held out any longer. I need to come, but first I want to watch him do it. I move his hand with mine and together we stroke him to completion. I come as his body contracts around me. His fingers trying to find purchase on my skin but we’re both sweaty and his hand is slick with his own come.
~~~64~~~ I don’t think I’ve ever come so hard in my life. He tosses the condom and then rolls me onto my side. He’s crushed against the back of the sofa. I’m practically falling off so I move closer. His arm is around my waist, holding me gently. His fingers push my hair off my face. I shiver as our sweat dries in the cool of the loft. Drapes my hoody over us and closes his eyes. I sigh. I should get moving but when I try to get up his arm tightens around my waist. I close my eyes too.
~~~65~~~ I don’t know how long I’ve been staring at him. I’m stiff, and a little cold, but he’s sleeping, and from the dark circles under his eyes I’m guessing he doesn’t get to do that very often. I have a few more questions I’d like answered. A few more questions I know are really none of my business but I’ve decided to worry about what is and isn’t my business later. Right now I am just going to make it my business to keep him from leaving. He can’t leave while he’s sleeping and so I close my eyes again.
~~~66~~~ He’s faking being asleep. I’ve seen him when he’s really out, although he had done a lot of drugs last night. Was it really only last night? If I move now he pulls me close, or his hand presses against my back. I close my eyes again and when I peek through my lashes he’s staring at me. He’s a little creepy and I really want to get of here and start my new life, or at least a new chapter of it. It’s only four thirty, technically he’s paid for a few more hours. I go back to sleep.
~~~67~~~ He’s asleep again. As I hold him, his face buried against my chest he starts to mumble. Mumbles become whimpers. His hands are balled into fists and punching at me. He lets out a strangled cry and when I try to hold and soothe him he kicks me, tensing his body, and twisting out of my reach. He lands on the floor. I hear the thunk as his head hits the hardwood.
I move to the floor but he’s awake now and still pushing me away. “I’m fine, get off.”
He stands up, looking around with wild scared eyes.
~~~68~~~ I roll my eyes and leave. He’s standing too close. I push him away, getting my bearings and heading for the door. He stops me. This is getting really tired. “Brian, let me go.” He’s blocking the doorway and I can feel the panic rising. I scream at him. He still doesn’t move. “Let me out.”
“You want your clothes first?”
Shit. I take a deep breath, steadying my nerves. “Yeah.”
I’m dressed in record time. Checking my hoody, cash’s there.
“Yeah?” I stop one hand still on the open door.
“Just… let me know where you end up.”
~~~69~~~ The door shuts. The loft seems empty and quiet compared to the previous day’s drama. It’s already dark out, and cold. I head towards the shower. Tonight I think it’s time to revisit Woody’s and Babylon.
I don’t think about him at all in the shower. He doesn’t cross my mind as I choose just the right jeans and the perfect black shirt. He has nothing to do with which shoes I wear, and I don’t even care that the jacket I chose is warm, and that he doesn’t seem to own one.
I stop at the ATM before Woody’s.
~~~70~~~ I clutch the money in my fist as I keep my hands in my pockets to stay warm. I consider getting a hotel room but decide to pick up the kind of trick who’ll pay for that sort of thing. This time tomorrow, I’ll be on a whole new level.
A large sleek white sedan pulls up. The guy’s fat and ugly and I’ve dealt with him before but not like this. He calls me over. “Hey, I’ve missed you.”