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Ny (not_yet_defined) wrote in qaf_coffeeclub,
@ 2009-10-18 10:00:00

The Ladies of QaF
We've had Brian love posts. We've had Justin love posts. We've had Michael love posts. I think there may have been Emmett love posts here too.

But you know what I'm feeling a need for? Some reminders of why we love the Women of Queer as Folk.

What female character do you love the most?

What do you love about each of the female characters on QaF?

Which mom reminds you most of your own?Debbie?Jennifer?Mel?Linds?Ted's Mom?

Which female character was the hardest for you to come to love, but did eventually?

What else do you have to say about why the women of QaF are made of awesome?

What is your favorite scene with Melanie?Debbie?Lindsay?Daphne?Cynthia?Jennifer?

What is your favorite icon of Deb?Jennifer?Linds?Mel?Daph?Cynthia?

It's a tough call for me too choose which I love the most, in fact it's impossible. But storyline wise i'd go with Jennifer. Her evolution over the course of the show is definitely one of my favorite parts of Queer as Folk. Probably because she reminds me most of my mom too. Well, my mom's got a little Deb in her too, but the way she comes to terms with Justin being gay, and his life, and Brian, etc. all of that reminds me so very much of my relationship over time with my own mom. At the beginning of the series there are so many times when I feel upset with her, it's such a 180 to how I feel about Jennifer at the end of the series when she is just made of awesome.

Lindsay was the character that took the most time for me to warm up to. But at her core she is so caring and concerned for those she loves, how can you help but not come to love her? I think

jule1122 once put it best when she said, "I do have a complicated relationship with Lindsay. She is probably my least favorite of the main characters, but that doesn't mean she is evil or manipulative. It means I find her flaws the hardest to deal with. She is like a family member I love and want to be happy, but I don't always particularly like." That's such a brilliant way of putting it.

Enough of my thoughts. Now share some of yours. And please do share your favorite pics/icons of the ladies. I don't think I have enough, and I need to steal some of yours!

ETA: Fortunately some people have reminded me of some other favorite ladies, so don't forget to leave your love of them too. Sorry Marianne, Leda and Tracy

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	not_yet_defined 2009-10-18 03:21 pm UTC (link)
	My favorite lindsay/melanie icon. I love how much joy they had in this moment, and how well it's expressed in this icon. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	not_yet_defined 2009-10-18 03:27 pm UTC (link)
	I almost forgot, the icon above was made by youbetterwiseup. As was this one. Another great Mel/Linds icon. :D (Reply to this) (Parent)

	not_yet_defined 2009-10-18 03:26 pm UTC (link)
	This is hands down my favorite Jennifer and Justin moment. And one of my favorite icons i've ever made. (Reply to this)

firehead30
2009-10-18 04:58 pm UTC (link)

My favorite female character is Jennifer. She fucked up, owned it, learned from it and then did her best to accept and love her son and the man he loved regardless of her own fears and conditioning.

Deb took me forever to love. I know, weird.

But she is so loud and so nosy and so very very manipulative. She got on my nerves. But I also thought her extremely kind, loyal and very giving. One of my favorite relationships on the show was between Em and Debbie in seasons four and five.

Linds, well she gets on my nerves, but my kids always tell me that Linds and I are very similar....

I think Tracy is one of my favorite characters from season one. I completely understand her crushing on Michael. I loved how she dealt with the haters and fat Mallory's faggot jokes. Plus when she tells of Michael for not telling her the truth, she is completely made of win. She never acts out of spite and my goodness does she have reason to.

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maxymama
2009-10-18 07:39 pm UTC (link)

I agree about the Em-Deb love!

You make great points about Tracy. (It's Fat Marley, btw, I think.)

I think being compared to Lindsay is a compliment, unless you chose an old lover to be the father of your child and haven't ever really gotten over him, to the point that you take his side in child-rearing issues against your partner. I wish the show would've explored her post-partum depression more, but at the same time, I feel like it would've been predictable and therefore unnecessary.

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:44 am UTC

not_yet_defined
2009-10-19 01:41 am UTC (link)

oh thank you for mentioning tracy. i really really liked her. and really really hate that story line because i feel so terrible for her. and a tiny bit for michael too, although mostly pissed at him for doing it, but understanding why. but it's one of those universal stories that does happen in real life and needed to be told. and she is so made of awesome in the end. i love her.

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	firehead30 2009-10-18 05:03 pm UTC (link)
	Stop running from me because I'm not running from you! I'm still your mother and you're still my son, and I still love you! And to me, that just about says it all. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	not_yet_defined 2009-10-19 01:38 am UTC (link)
	I agree. :D (Reply to this) (Parent)

etextraordinary
2009-10-18 07:28 pm UTC (link)

My favorite female character is Daphne. She is such a good friend, it seems like she was always there when Justin needed her; especially after the break up with ~~Ian~~ Ethan. I wish we had seen more of her, because every time she was in the show it added a little more to Justin's character.

I think the hardest characters to see in the show are Joan and Lindz's parents. I know that you are not really supposed to like them too much, but after watching an episode with them in it (in particular 410 and 507). I know its because these characters hit a bit too close to home. I've always wished for a Mom like Debbie or Jennifer, so I love their characters as well, and I love Jennifer's development from "That Brian" to being sad that Justin turned Brian down with his first marriage proposal.

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	firehead30 2009-10-18 08:19 pm UTC (link)
	I think the hardest characters to see in the show are Joan and Lindz's parents. I know that you are not really supposed to like them too much, but after watching an episode with them in it (in particular 410 and 507). I know its because these characters hit a bit too close to home So very very true!!! Daphne rocks my socks. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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etextraordinary, 2009-10-18 08:29 pm UTC

etextraordinary
2009-10-18 08:31 pm UTC (link)

I know that you are not really supposed to like them too much, but after watching an episode with them in it (in particular 410 and 507).

Appearently I'm an idiot tonight, because I only wrote half of my sentence there... It should say:

I know that you are not really supposed to like them too much, but after watching an episode with them in it (in particular 410 and 507) I am really down for a while and have been known to start crying.

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not_yet_defined
2009-10-19 01:36 am UTC (link)

One of my favorite things about Daphne isn't just how supportive she is of justin, but how supportive she is of his relationship with brian. even when he was with ethan, she was always there pointing out how much brian did for him. as a b/j fan girl, you gotta love that.

in fact i think there was an icon out there of Daphne that said "The original B/J fangirl" or if there isn't there should be, and i need it.

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:36 am UTC

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etextraordinary, 2009-10-19 06:06 am UTC

	maxymama 2009-10-18 07:32 pm UTC (link)
	Jennifer is definitely my favorite, especially when she stands up to the principal about the lack of similarities between a gay-straight club and a KKK club. She's lost and in over her head, trying to do the best she can. This seems true even before Justin came out. (Reply to this) (Thread)

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firehead30, 2009-10-18 08:13 pm UTC

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:32 am UTC

circadia
2009-10-18 07:59 pm UTC (link)

I really can't say I have a favorite, so I've got a goal to try to make a post about why I love one of them each day this week.

Today: DEBBIE
The above is personally, one of my favorite icons I've ever made.

Given the episode I go up and down with my feelings about her actions, but overall, I absolutely adore Deb, despite all her craziness and flaws.
Mostly because of this line: (from 204)
Michael: It's easy for you to wave banners and march around. You've got nothing to lose. Hell, you're not even gay!
Deb: Well, I'm the next best thing. And I'm damn proud of it.

I mean, there's a TON of great Debbie lines, but for me, this basically summarizes a main reasons I think I identify with her character more than most others.

Well, okay that one and
"I've always said it isn't who you love, it's how you love. Genitalia is simply God's way of accessorizing" (103)

Ok I'll stop quoting but you get the picture.
It is clear from the beginning that she absolutely loves her family more than anything - not limiting 'family' to being blood relatives, of course. In fact, with the exception of the beginning of the relationship with Ben, she is typically so accepting and loving toward people from all walks of life. And although she is not gay, she is just as outspoken and actively involved, if not moreso, than most people I know in parades/marches/protests for LGBT rights/etc.
In these respects, I find her character to inspire me in a way to do the same in my own life, and that is why I love Debbie. *nods*

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firehead30, 2009-10-18 08:18 pm UTC

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circadia, 2009-10-18 08:41 pm UTC

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fun_demented, 2009-10-18 10:22 pm UTC

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firehead30, 2009-10-18 10:25 pm UTC

	opal11 2009-10-18 08:03 pm UTC (link)
	i have to go with the majority here..my favorite is jennifer, one of my favorite moments with her is 2-02 when she tells brian to take her son, that had to be hard for her to do,to put trust back into brian,even tho at that time she doesnt want to. (Reply to this) (Thread)

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nerilka24, 2009-10-18 09:24 pm UTC

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:30 am UTC

cam_a
2009-10-18 08:21 pm UTC (link)

I absolutly adore Jennifer. She's just a great mom, and yeah she fucked up big time but she owned it and in the end came through for Justin, when he really needed her. + I love watching the relationship between her and Brian as it grows.

I also love Cynthia, she was Brian's alley and biggest supporter when he worked at Vanguard...and when he got fired lol. Oh and the fact that she won't take Brian's BS and tells him off to his face just makes her even cooler. Especially when Brian says he's going to Ibiza, her response "Be sure to eat plenty of fresh fruit and drink lots of tap water" just kills me. lol

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nerilka24, 2009-10-18 09:27 pm UTC

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fun_demented, 2009-10-18 10:16 pm UTC

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:26 am UTC

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_alicesprings, 2009-10-19 05:53 am UTC

	nerilka24 2009-10-18 09:33 pm UTC (link)
	And the sexiest lady in QAF? My vote goes to Marianne. (Reply to this) (Thread)

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fun_demented, 2009-10-18 10:18 pm UTC

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:24 am UTC

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xie_xie_xie, 2009-10-19 02:34 am UTC

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nerilka24, 2009-10-19 06:40 am UTC

fun_demented
2009-10-18 10:18 pm UTC (link)

I actually like Lindsay a whole lot most of the time. But when she's wrong it is damn frustrating! But like all the characters, she's been "next favorite" before. Next favorite means after Brian and Justin who are always my favorites.

I have to say that Daphne is my favorite female most of the time. But I LOVE what you said about Jenn's storyline and 100% agree, 100%. Jennifer was also my "next favorite" before. All the females have been, as well as all the males, except Carl and Vic. LOL. But I won't be surprised if one day one of those two rise in the ranks. Oh, and Drew's never been a favorite and I don't believe he ever will be.

But Daphne and Jennifer and Debbie and Mel and Linds are all way way up there!! My order of favorite with all the characters (other than Justin and Brian) get all moved around, and it's not dependent on which season or episode. For example, when Lindsay was my favorite and I got to the difficult episodes, it was great, b/c I got to see her in a new more forgiving perspective.

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:23 am UTC

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fun_demented, 2009-10-19 02:08 am UTC

arcady
2009-10-19 12:17 am UTC (link)

I love Jennifer and Daphne, but I'm going to to be the odd one out and say Lindsay.

Up until Ted started working for Kinnetik, Lindsay was the only normal friend Brian had. His friendship with Michael, while magical, was 10x more complicated and at least partially motivated by longing. I don't doubt that Lindsay's wondered about what "might have been" on occasion (RE: the preschool scene), but it doesn't drive her and it doesn't impair her judgment. Yes, she absolutely did things in 4 and 5 that I didn't agree with, but I would argue that when it comes to Brian (and Justin), she never wavered in her support. I honestly don't know if Brian and Justin would have ever ended up getting as far as they did if not for Lindsay's intervention. Daphne was great for motivating Justin, but it wouldn't have worked nearly as well if Lindsay hadn't relentlessly pushed Brian toward Justin. So many S1 moments were directly preceded by a Brian/Lindsay scene, in which she forced him to get his ass into gear. Lindsay always told him like she saw it, unlike anyone else in Brian's life. WIthout Lindsay, I don't think Brian would have ever gone to art show, if not for Lindsay. I don't know if he would have ever taken Justin home to face his parents and brought him home, if not for Lindsay. I don't know if he would have ever gone to New York if not for Lindsay being the first one to tell him it was wrong to kick him out. And, in my opinion, I don't think he would have gone to the prom.

The Brian/Lindsay dynamic was semi-lost in later seasons, at first because Brian and Justin defined their relationship in S2, and later because Michael and Justin became friends in S4. But in the scenes that they did have, she always maintained that pro B/J philosophy, and in my opinion, bears the most outsider responsibility for the development of B/J in S1. With one anti-Justin friend, Brian needed one pro-Justin friend, and Lindsay was it. I didn't always like her choices in her own life, but for that reason, I have to give her my vote.

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not_yet_defined, 2009-10-19 01:21 am UTC

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arcady, 2009-10-19 01:32 am UTC

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_alicesprings, 2009-10-19 05:54 am UTC

jule1122
2009-10-19 01:41 am UTC (link)

From the beginning Debbie and Melanie were my favorite female characters and that never really changed. I adore Daphne and think she is a fabulous friend to Justin, but she doesn't really have her own story.

To me, Debbie is just made of love. Sure she loves loudly, but also completely and with her whole heart. She can't be anyone but who she is. A lot of her faults stem from that same need to speak her mind and do what she thinks is best for those she loves so even when she is wrong it is easy for me to forgive her. I also think it takes a lot of courage to live with your heart on your sleeve as much as Debbie does.

I started watching QAF at the height of my fertility problems so it was easy for me to identify with Melanie and how she could totally love and adore Gus, but be very frustrated about having Brian as the father. I love that Melanie is strong and smart but also very loving and nurturing. She is also a great friend to Ted and Justin. I also appreciated a character (especially in S1) who wasn't in awe of Brian and could point out his faults without making excuses for him. Debbie and Melanie both get a lot of fandom hate for not worshiping Brian, and that just makes me extra protective of them.

NY already mentioned my struggles with Lindsay. Some of them are related to Melanie and others to Brian. In general, I find Lindsay a little unwilling to compromise and a bit manipulative. But she is also loyal and loving and works very hard to create a family that is full of love. I love how she takes Justin into her life, I love her proposal to Melanie, and I love that she never gives up on the happiness she knows she and Melanie can have.

Jennifer is a character I just can't get a handle on. For all the times that I love her, there are other times when she frustrates the hell out of me. People have mentioned some of the great moments of support she had with Justin-chasing after him at school, standing up to the principal etc. And I think because of those, the times when I see her hurt him really bother. Maybe when my kids are older, I'll be able to understand, but considering she didn't know Brian at all, turning Justin over to him (maybe in hopes Justin would come running home?) seems really insane. And the scene at Molly's birthday party absolutely breaks my heart. I also can't believe there was no middle ground between Brian not seeing Justin at all and her turning Justin over to him again in 202. It might be because Justin is my favorite, but I feel like when Justin is too much trouble sometimes Jennifer gives up too easily. I write a lot of Jennifer drabbles trying to understand her and I try and focus on the times when she is awesome because I know she loves Justin. I also love her and Debbie as friends.

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nerilka24, 2009-10-19 05:05 pm UTC

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jule1122, 2009-10-19 10:28 pm UTC

secretsolitaire
2009-10-19 03:06 am UTC (link)

Great post!

I think Debbie is probably my favorite for her absolutely huge heart (it's even bigger than her mouth, but maybe not by much *g*). She is a force of nature and she loves so hard, both of which I admire her for.

I like Jennifer for her quiet strength -- she's a huge part of what makes Justin who he is. I also like that she finally had her own little romance in S5. She is a sexy lady and deserves a sexy boyfriend. ;-)

I love Mel because she's feisty and smart, she loves fiercely, she doesn't take crap from people, and she's hot, yo.

I like Lindsay in a sort of similar way to the way I like Jennifer, actually -- they both are more "ladylike" characters, but they have cores of steel. I always enjoy when Lindsay tells Brian like it is. (He really needs strong people around him to do that -- Lindsay, Debbie, Justin.)

Daphne is lovely and fun, and I wish she'd been on the show more often.

Cynthia is awesome, and I wish she'd been on the show more often too. :-)

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sjmpets
2009-10-19 03:39 pm UTC (link)

i think my favorite was jennifer. not only for standing up for her son, but also for her growth. my favorite scene is after the bombing and brian tells her that he asked justin to marry him, gave her a moment for the shock to set in, then tells her justin turned him down. then when she's leaving telling him she's sorry she won't be his mother-in-law. this from the woman who told him to stay away from her son. held it against him that justin almost died. then she apologizes for them not getting married. omg you just got to love her.

daphne, best faghag ever.

cynthia, i think was more onto brian then lindsay. she just knew brian so well. saw him good, saw him bad.

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vl_redreign
2009-10-20 12:59 am UTC (link)

It's a tie for me.

Jennifer and Daphne, and for the same reason.

They both love Justin unconditionally, and will kick your ass if you hurt him.

Jennifer is nothing like my mother (that would be Deb-rude, crude and socially unacceptable), but I saw flashes of myself in her is Season one...that initial denial. I never sent my kid to a shrink, but I did have those moments of "she doesn't know what she wants". I still have them, but for different reasons. Every mom on the show I've had some similarity to at one point or another. It's a mom thing. Watching her with Debbie after the art show in 106 was great, and, unlike some others, I thought that her decision to tell Craig what was going on was the right one. Craig was his father, and as such, had every right to know what his minor son, that's right, minor son, was up to. She may have overstated her fears, but moms do that.

Daphne I adore. She's steadfast, brilliant, beautiful, and her friendship with Justin was wonderful to watch. Even when she found herself falling in love with him a bit, she got over it. After awhile, anyway, cause come on! Who wouldn't fall in love with Justin? She sent him after Brian not once, but twice. Both times she was right. How can you not love that? When she thought Justin was in over his head with the Posse, she went to Brian. And even though she didn't like what he had to say, she let Justin figure it out himself.

Justin's women are teh bomb!

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lilacwine10
2009-10-22 11:03 am UTC (link)

For me, Jennifer was probably my favourite as well, though I loved Debbie and Daphne too.

Loved the Justin coming out/Jennifer trying to do the best thing storyline - sometimes getting it wrong, but ultimately getting it right.

Though Debbie is sometimes too OTT for me/manipulative, she is generally very lovable. I "liked" the Vic's death storyline. It made my cry, cringe, etc. "Liked" is the wrong word. All I know is that it brought out strong emotions in me.

Quite liked Tudy too. I felt really sorry for Trudy at Michael's party. Talk about getting caught in the Brian/Michael crossfire. She deserved better.

I liked Mel and Lindsey some of the time, but the constant fighting, sometimes in front of Gus, killed any substantial love I might have had for them (plus they did seem rather moneygrubbing where Brian was concerned).

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ladycaid
2009-10-23 06:14 pm UTC (link)

What female character do you love the most? Daphne - she loves and supports Justin no matter what and she always tells him what she is thinking, whether he wants to hear it or not.

What do you love about each of the female characters on QaF?

Jennifer - she just loves her son and while it took some time she accepts who he is - plus she learned to accept his decisions. Even when she had trouble dealing with the fact that Justin was gay, it was obvious that she loved him. that's what a mother does.

Deb - she loves her son and supports gay rights.

Mel - the woman has balls

Lindsey - is compassionate

Tracey - forgiving - she forgave what Michael did to her.

Daphne - she just rocks

Cynthia - very accepting of Brian and can put him in his place - love it!

Which mom reminds you most of your own?Debbie?Jennifer?Mel?Linds?Ted's Mom? Jennifer

Which female character was the hardest for you to come to love, but did eventually?

Lindsey - not sure I ever came to love her, but came to understand her

What else do you have to say about why the women of QaF are made of awesome?

What is your favorite scene with Melanie?Debbie?Lindsay?Daphne?Cynthia?Jennifer?

Jennifer - when Justin shows her his marriage/commitment announcement.

Melanie - sitting in the bar with the guys after they left Linds house and found Gui there.

Daphne - After she and Justin left the apartment of (he who shall not be named) and Daphne reminds Justin that Brian NEVER made him deny who he was.

Debbie - when she came to see Brian after he lost his job

Cynthia - when she told Brian to eat plenty of fruit and drink lots of water when he told her he was going to Ibiza.

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