|perhin (perhin) wrote in perhin_fics,|
@ 2008-04-23 12:25:00
|Entry tags:||harry potter, humor, parody, rated pg, ron weasley|
Should Have Stayed With Chess
Title:Should Have Stayed With Chess
Summary:Ron tries out for one hell of a contest!
Harry looked at his friend for the fifth time in at least ten minutes. Ron was humming an annoying tune and shaking his head and his quill kept splattering ink all over the charms essay before him. Looking over Ron's shoulder, Hermione grimaced in disgust at the poorly written essay and sat down in the seat next to him, dumping all of her books onto the library table.
"What are you humming, Ron?" Harry asked.
"Go sister, hey sister, umm. yeah. lady marmalade."
Hermione and Harry exchanged looks. This wasn't normal. Ron had never shown any interest in music before, and he had never had a messier piece of parchment.
"What is that song you were singing?" Hermione asked. She looked again at his essay and cringed at the ink spots.
"I dunno. Oh, I really like this other one by.This Britney girl."
Harry and Hermione both covered their ears as Ron burst into song.
"OOPS, I DID IT AGAIN!"
"Thank you, RON, for getting us kicked out of the library!" Hermione said with a huff. She glared at him over her stack of books.
"Sorry, I just kept getting these songs in my head." "Well, get them out!"
Harry shook his head and walked off to the common room.
"Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready. Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready. Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready. Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready. Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready. Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready. Are you-"
"Dammit, Ron! Be quiet!" Harry said. "Stop singing! If you must sing, at least sing in your regular voice and stop switching from a girl's voice to a man's."
"Don't insult Jeffrey Osborne!"
"Who is that?"
Harry shoved the pillow over his face as Ron sang the lyrics of his new song again. Would he ever stop singing? He could tell Dean, Seamus, and Neville were doing the same thing. Harry peaked out of his curtains. Ron was clearly dancing on his bed. Badly.
"I was lying on the bench slide in the park across the street l-a-t-e-r that week
"My sticky paws were in to making straws out of big fat slurpy treats"
A pillow was thrown across the room at Ron, making him fall off the bed.
"Be quiet, Ron!" Dean yelled. "Some people would like to sleep!"
"I have to practice!"
"Practice somewhere else!"
"Harry, Hermione, we need to talk."
"The hell we do!" Harry said. "You kept us up until two last night!"
"You do realize what Draco and his little friends are doing?" Hermione said. "They've gone and made posters saying that you're singing for money to pay off loans for your house!"
Harry grabbed the back of Ron's shirt before he could run off.
"You can beat up Draco later. First tell us what you were going to say."
"I'm.I'm going to try out Magical Idol!"
Harry and Hermione just stared.
"It's true! I'm going to try out and be the next Magical Idol! I'm going to be up there with William Mung and Clay Smith!
"I don't know which song I want to try out with. The muggles have a lot of choices, so that's why I've been singing songs you don't know about-
"We both live in muggle homes-"Harry said.
"They're mostly American. Dad set up a muggle rodeo-"
"Radio," corrected Hermione.
"-And I can listen to American muggle songs! Wish me luck!"
Hermione and Harry stood outside of the tall, leaning building that was hosting the auditions.
"How do you think he will do?" Hermione asked.
"Be quiet here he comes."
Ron walked to the wizard who happened to be the host of Magical Idol, took the wand out of his hand a muttered "Sonorus".
"This is what I think of Magical Idol. You suck! You ^&*(%^& ^%@#$*% ! I deserved that trip to Glasgow! Damn you! You're all a^%*(^&^! Especially you, SAMUAL! Why couldn't you have been nice like Patty?! WHY?!"
"Give me back my wand!"
Hermione looked at Harry.
"He should have stayed with chess."