PARABOLICAL GRAFFITI

Is this really what people are reduced to doing with their lives nowadays? Posting every little problem that has ever plagued them on a public message board for the world to see?

So some god decided to shit you out sixty two years ago, only to leave you with a list full of burdens and his two week old sextuplets? Well guess what? NOBODY cares. Someone calls you a whore or an idiot or a purple groundhog and you move on with your life. Get over it. It’s really not that hard to do.

In case you people didn’t notice, you have a city full of psychos, clowns, evil lunatics and God only knows what else. One of these days one of them is going to decide that he wants to turn the world into a giant bowl of ice cream and the person who can stop it won’t be there. He or she will be here. Whining like a three year old and hoping to get hours of attention and buckets full of sympathy.

You’re not the feature story on Oprah. Stop acting like it.

Oh Merlin!!

Why did it suddenly start raining people from my world...er, Harry Potter?! And why isn't a single one of them Pavarti, or Seamus or Dean? I think my brain will explode!

[Filtered to Peter Petrelli]

So how's the Hyperion doing? I miss all of you, but for now I think it's safest I stay with Edward. But I'm not sure how much longer I can take staying indoors. Greyback's going to find me no matter how long I hide.

Dancing kings and queens....this is research for work. What sort of music makes you wanna get up and dance?

I just tried to find a pair of sweatpants in my closet. Either they're hiding, or missing. I did, however, find at least ten dresses I'm never going to wear.

I think the salvation army could use some new dresses.

[Edward]
Do you know what she did with my sweat pants?

And, hi. I love you.
[/Private]

whys the wrld sad?

You know, I get the whole 'dough' part 'cause you gotta bake a doughnut to actually make one, but where in the heck do they get the nut part? Most doughnuts don't have nuts in them!

I'm gonna go get some doughnuts now.

While I'm gone, I want all of you to answer the following questions:

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
2. Have you ever eaten a crayon?
3. What are you wearing right now? ;)
4. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
5. Cowboys or Indians?

This place is beyond freaky. Am I the only normal person here? I can't be.

Good day. My hat, no, not just a hat, a very piece of my soul if you will, has been misplaced. As simple as it is in appearance I assure you, that hat is no toy, in the wrong hands it is a most dangerous weapon.

Where are things taken that are lost?

[posted is a snapshot of a very detailed sketch of a shopping mall, with three figures in the foreground all holding shopping bags, easily identifiable as Alice, Bella and Katrina because of the artist's skill. Above the image is a blank grid seven rows across and five rows down, a check in the block that corresponds with the 28th on a calendar. Next to this grid is a question mark.]

Remind me to never again indulge Bella with my human food skills. I feel rather.... odd.

I have stepped out of 1850 and into a brothel. A rather large, British brothel that everyone uses frequently.

It horrifies me. Three quarters of you are not even married!

Oh my jesus crap.

I'm in heat.

Hello friends,

I have a question for you: if you could get rid of the superhuman powers many people in this city appear to possess... would you?

H.G.

Okay, something strange is going on. The woods don't turn into a city in the blink of an eye, and Forks hasn't had this much sunshine ever.

Could someone please tell me where I am? Possibly even how I got here? Anything at all would be helpful. Maybe I've hit my head and this is all some sort of hallucination...

Edward, if you're out there somewhere, come find me. Please?