Ruby (![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} dontcallmebitch) wrote in ![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} parabolical,@ 2009-08-14 19:38:00 |
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Who: Ruby & Castiel
What: She's still nervous.
When: After Cas is done at the scene of the Scourge Attack
Where: Ruby's Apartment
Rating: TBD
Status: In Progress
What: She's still nervous.
When: After Cas is done at the scene of the Scourge Attack
Where: Ruby's Apartment
Rating: TBD
Status: In Progress
She'd run home just as she figured Castiel had wanted her to, she didn't know how to reason with the things that attacked her, the things she had first fled from, They weren't new to her, sure the breed was, but the concept, no, that wasn't new at all, They were a single minded evil, she knew it. She'd been it, and she didn't like it turned against her. And thats what they'd done. Those creatures, demons. They'd attacked her for her humanity. And all Ruby had thought, as she'd hidden high above ready to possess and give up the body if she'd had to, was how hillarious Sam, would have found that. Humanity. She didn't have much of that did she, much as she'd been good at faking it. But then, if she was nothing more than any other demon, why had she helped Dean out. Why had she handed over her knife...
She figured she knew the answer, Castiel. Hardly human either but able to understand different sides of humanity to her. Ruby understood one side of it, the craving for power and attention they all had, their self destructiveness, all the negitives. The positives confused her much as she had seen them, in Sam, in Ben. In Claire and Dean tonight. And so she'd helped them and immediatly wanted out, wanted away from them, and their confusing happiness. On a petty level they bothered her, just like Mary and John did, like Sam and Faith did. She'd taken him back after everything, after what Ruby had known to be cheating on every level but a sexual one even if neither she or Sam had acknowledged it at the time. And now he was starting to be happy again and she had petty moments where she hated him for it, and then hated Faith, and generally anyone happy.
It was pointless really, she deserved what she was getting, all of it. But rebuilding was hard. Especially when Castiel would only occasionally show signs that he might possibly still on some deeply angelic level of curiousity want to help her. He wasn't letting himself love her, that was for sure, and why should he. She wasn't worth him.
Ruby bolted the door behind her, all three of the locks and found another knife that could be a weapon before she moved into her bedroom lay stomach down on the bed and tried to make sense of the events of the night.
She wasn't finding it easy.
She figured she knew the answer, Castiel. Hardly human either but able to understand different sides of humanity to her. Ruby understood one side of it, the craving for power and attention they all had, their self destructiveness, all the negitives. The positives confused her much as she had seen them, in Sam, in Ben. In Claire and Dean tonight. And so she'd helped them and immediatly wanted out, wanted away from them, and their confusing happiness. On a petty level they bothered her, just like Mary and John did, like Sam and Faith did. She'd taken him back after everything, after what Ruby had known to be cheating on every level but a sexual one even if neither she or Sam had acknowledged it at the time. And now he was starting to be happy again and she had petty moments where she hated him for it, and then hated Faith, and generally anyone happy.
It was pointless really, she deserved what she was getting, all of it. But rebuilding was hard. Especially when Castiel would only occasionally show signs that he might possibly still on some deeply angelic level of curiousity want to help her. He wasn't letting himself love her, that was for sure, and why should he. She wasn't worth him.
Ruby bolted the door behind her, all three of the locks and found another knife that could be a weapon before she moved into her bedroom lay stomach down on the bed and tried to make sense of the events of the night.
She wasn't finding it easy.