Severus Snape (brewingdeceit) wrote in parabolical, @ 2008-05-03 18:16:00 |
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Entry tags: | closed, severus snape |
Who: Severus Snape (CLOSED)
What: Dealing with the aftermath of Lily's disappearance.
When: Mid-afternoon
Where: His virtually destroyed hotel room.
Rating: PG-ish (to be safe)
Status: COMPLETE
She was gone. He'd gone out to gather a few supplies for the Wolfsbane, as well as a handful of other potions he'd decided to begin brewing, and when he'd returned she was no where to be found. Severus had just gotten Lily back, seen her through a terrible accident, and now she just… wasn't there.
He knew she hadn't left the room. The wards were still in place, and her shoes were still on the floor beside the bed. Her clothing still hung in the closet. Yet she was nowhere to be found. It wasn't until after he'd performed a few spells that he'd realized she had simple vanished. It wasn't uncommon in this place. People arrived and disappeared without warning. Yet this time, it was personal. This time, it hurt.
He'd always had a temper and didn't always keep it under as tight of wraps as he should. So it should really come as no surprise to anyone who knew him that, within moments of discovering he'd once more lost the only person he'd ever truly loved, his hotel room had resembled a Muggle war zone. Pictures were shattered against the walls, tables were upended, even the mirror overtop the sink now had a large crack running along the side of it.
His rage at the unfairness of it all depleted, Severus had slid to the floor and finally allowed his tears to fall. He wasn't certain how long he sat there. It could have been moments or weeks, he lost all track of time as his sorrow - as fresh as it had been the night he'd learned of her death at the hands of the Dark Lord - poured out of him. Then, when he was out of tears and his throat was raw from his sobs, he slowly uncurled himself and peered around.
There was nothing left for him here, now. With Lily gone, there was nothing. He had nothing, was nothing. Yet, even in such a dark hour, he couldn't bring himself to end it. It would be so simple… a mere taste of the aconite and he'd just cease to exist. He couldn't do it, though. He was many things, but a coward was not one of them.
I can, however, change this wretched youthful appearance, he realized with startling clarity. After all, the only reason he hadn't done so in the first place was to remain closer to Lily. With her gone, that reason was moot.
Straightening, his mind seemed to latch onto the idea much like a drowning man given a life raft. He rose from the floor, already taking a mental note of the ingredients he would require. Luck, it seemed, was on his side in this as he had all of them present.
And, less than a few hours later, he had brewed himself a draught that would restore him to the age that his mind said he should be. Studying the bottle for a moment, he barely hesitated as he considered the consequences to his actions. Worst case, he had made an error in his brewing and he would die. Seeing as how he'd been brewing potions most of his life, however, he thought that wasn't very likely. So with little more than a small shrug, he raised the phial to his lips and drank. A heartbeat later, he collapsed to the ground in a heap. When he awoke, head pounding and slightly disoriented, a quick glance in the broken mirror told him all he needed to know.
The potion had worked. He was a grown man once more.