pr0ntober for zaila
Tamaki/Haruhi, carpet burn. Unbetaed, ~500 words. I should stop warning for no actual smut. XD Hope you enjoy!
Haruhi would almost have preferred Tamaki's normal dramatics to this. Ever since he had discovered the slight (already healing) scrapes along her tailbone, he'd withdrawn, reining in his normal enthusiasm and putting her off whenever she even looked like she might want to have sex. She finally cornered him in the kitchen, backing him against the counter when he'd gone in for a drink.
"Tamaki," she said. "This is getting ridiculous. Are you really planning to never have sex with me again?"
He squeezed his eyes shut. "Yes," he whispered, setting his glass down. "Yes," he repeated, his voice growing louder. "A brute such as me doesn't deserve the gift of your love! Haruhi!" He bent over, carefully placing his hands on her shoulders. "I marred your precious skin!" he choked.
"Look, Tamaki," she sighed. "I'm fine. It stung a little bit, but it healed right up in a day or so."
"That is TWO WHOLE DAYS you had to SUFFER in order to SLAKE my ANIMAL LUSTS!" He spun around, hands planted on the counter in artful torment. "Haruhi, my very presence must pain you to the depths of your soul."
"Why me?" she muttered.
Tamaki's shoulders trembled. "I can leave immediately...or...no! I must turn myself in! This is clearly a case of battery! I'll," he swallowed and swung back around, hands raised in consternation. "I'll leave the method of punishment up to Ranka-san, it's his right as your--"
"You know," Haruhi cut in, "we can just do it on the bed next time."
Tamaki froze mid-wail, his mouth open. "...ah?" His fingers curled and grasped at the air.
"Or, you know, if we wind up on the floor again, I can just get on top," she shrugged. "None of this is as dire as you're making it out to be."
"I..." His mouth worked, but the words didn't seem to be making it from his brain.
Haruhi waited another moment, but when it became obvious he would be a while, she shrugged and walked back to the living room. Tamaki's new favorite show was on, and while Haruhi didn't really care for it, watching was less trouble than listening him complain about missing it. Just as they were about to solve the mystery on this week's episode of "Righteous Biker Babe," Tamaki stumbled back into the room and fell to his knees beside her.
"Haruhi," he breathed, his eyes shining. "I--"
"They're about to show the murderer."
"Oh!" he shouted, immediately distracted. Haruhi nibbled on some crackers while Tamaki leaned forward, eyes wide and every muscle tense as the show's final minutes played out. As the credits began rolling, Tamaki heaved a satisfied sigh.
"You know, Haruhi," he beamed as he pulled her into his side. "Your genius in all things practical never ceases to amaze me." He fell backwards, rolling her so she lay on his front.
Haruhi smiled down at him, brushing his bangs back from his face. "And it never will, I'm sure."