InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "When I was a young warthog..."

Clara Sörensen (missclara) wrote in oldwest_rpg,
@ 2008-05-12 17:36:00

Entry tags:

clara sörensen, grayson whiteley

Who: Clara Sörensen and Grayson Whiteley
Where: Outside of the brothel
When: May 12th, late afternoon
Status: Incomplete
Summary: Clara goes for a walk to clear her head.

Clara looked up at the sky with a frown, as if the clouds were a personal affront. She had been trying to find a chance to escape by herself all day and now that the opportunity had finally arisen, the weather that confronted her was as gray and indifferent as her mood. The bonnet and parasol which she had optimistically grabbed now felt ridiculous in her hands as she took another step outside of the brothel.

"Oh, bother," she sighed aloud, knowing it was ridiculous to feel let down by the weather but unable to do otherwise. All she had wanted after a day of silly arguments with Isobel and an unlikable client was a chance to stroll about in the sun. Would nothing go right all day?

Resolving to make the best of the situation, Clara slipped the parasol around her wrist and forced a smile on her face. Perhaps if she pretended to feel happy and at ease the actual emotion would follow in its wake.

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banker_man
2008-05-12 07:01 pm UTC (link)

Grayson was finished for the day and was locking up. The bank had been slow that afternoon and he decided that it was time to let everybody off an hour early. So he'd sent all his employee's home, helped the last few customer's of the day himself and locked up. The day was grey out but the weather hadn't affected his moon. Grayson, while sometimes stressed with work, was usually the type of person to be positive, and to be happy. A few clouds weren't going to get him down. Wearing his derby hat and a three piece suit, Grayson had forgotten his coat inside. Shrugging it off, thinking he'd get it tomorrow he turned to look out over the street.

He was thinking about heading home, but then thought how it would be nice to pick up something sweet from the General store to go with dinner tonight. He'd requested his favourite meal from his house servant and he knew Arthur and his sister were gone for the evening, spending the night away from the house so that they could celebrate their wedding anniversary. It was a nice gesture and he was glad he'd suggested it. His sister lately had been rather depressed sounding and he hoped that the night out would do them both some good. He cared about his family, even though he just belonged to them and didn't head them. Walking down the steps he headed down the street towards the store whistling to himself.

Stopping and looking in some of the windows of the stores he noticed a rather familiar parasol strolling ahead of him. Quickening his steps Grayson came up beside her and fell in to step. "Afternoon Miss Sörensen. Finding yourself well today?" he asked, with a smile, his hands clasped behind his back.

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missclara
2008-05-12 07:41 pm UTC (link)

As her feet moved briskly down the street, Clara felt her mood lift. She had been foolish to feel petulant at the weather. The entire evening stretched open before her, asking to be filled with nothing more trying than her meanderings and perhaps dinner. She would be a spoiled girl indeed not to be able to appreciate such freedom. Her mind drifted easily from one topic to another, easily refusing to dwell on the unpleasant morning she had had. Clara always found it easy to push disagreeable subjects to the back of her mind and years in her current line of work had only reinforced this particular skill.

Lost in pleasant, trivial contemplations, it took a moment before Grayson's deep, familiar voice registered with her. Surprised she stopped mid-step and turned to face him, a delighted smile replacing the bemused expression she had been sporting previously.

"I am now," Clara answered honestly, making no effort to disguise the pleasure she took from his presence. The formality of the address and his polite posture charmed her and, if possible, her smile grew further as she noted them. "I wish you could do something about these clouds though. I had pinned my hopes on a sunny stroll."

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banker_man
2008-05-13 12:28 am UTC (link)

He had stepped of course, on to her right side, so he could hear her better and offered strong arm to her immediately after she acknowledged him. Grayson knew better then to become too affectionate with her out in public. Offering an arm to a lady you were with was just good manners. But he knew a proper decorum must be kept when a known brothel lady was in your company outside of the the brothel. Even if men were seen going in to Reed's House, confidentiality of who they saw was of course important. It was also something important to the girls who were women who while Grayson respected and disagreed with most, weren't taken seriously as an ideal partner. He however, thought Clara was perfect.

"You know very well Miss Sörensen that is mother nature took money, I'd pay her to keep the skies just as you like them." he said with a gentle smile at her. A proper smile, not his awkward planned one that he tried so hard to make look natural. His smile always came natural when he was in her company. "Besides that, how are you fairing? Just on a break?" he inquired. He didn't see Clara outside of her work place much, but then it was possible because he was working so much. He kept in time with her stroll though, never wanting to rush a lady.

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missclara
2008-05-13 03:06 am UTC (link)

"I only wish she were open to bribery!" Clara commented with a laugh, pleased equally by his response and winning smile. "How much more pleasant life would be."

Her smile never faltering for an instant, Clara accepted his proffered arm gratefully. It did seem strange to encounter Grayson on the street, as if he were any vague acquaintance she had happened to stumble across. Clara enjoyed his company and the idea of hiding the pleasure she took from this unexpected meeting never crossed her mind. Still, she was not so obtuse as to fail to realize the different social proprieties a meeting out in the open required, and accordingly checked the impulse to use his Christian name or appear overly affectionate. Clara might not have any sort of reputation to worry about anymore in this town but Grayson did, and the idea of doing inadvertent damage to it concerned her greatly. Matching his leisurely pace easily, she tried to keep her face friendly but rather bland.

She glanced up at the skies again before shifting her gaze to her companion, trying not to stare too blatantly at his profile as they continued down the street. After a moment of silence, Clara's manners belatedly prompted her to answer his question. "Aside from this disagreeable weather I am doing very well, Mr. Whitely. Thank you for asking. I have the entire afternoon at my disposal and plan on doing nothing more demanding than walking to and fro and perhaps indulging in a little shopping."

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banker_man
2008-05-13 05:35 pm UTC (link)

"Yes, she's a tough one to bargain with though, as much as I wish I could help you with this small plight." he said honestly. He really would pay whatever was the price for Clara to have her clear sunny skies. He was very much fond of this lady, some would probably say too much. His unspoken adoration of her, was obvious of course, between the two of them, and to the few people he had once told about Clara had admonished him for spending his money so foolishly.

It was one thing to pay for her services, how ever many times he needed them, but to purchase her things outside of the realm of that was unheard of. And while Grayson blatantly ignored these pleas for reason, he knew that he'd never have Clara as he wanted her truly. He shared with her everything he should be sharing with a wife, fears, dreams, innermost thoughts, and yet he could likely never ask for her hand. He would often purchase her things that weren't considered to be small trinkets of affection. Jewelry was a common place for him to give her, as well as fancy clothes. Both of the vendors of such goods used to often wonder who Mister Grayson was purchasing these goods for, as he had no wife.

They soon caught on and Grayson had paid them a fair sum to not say anything about it, that his and Clara's relationship was not to be discussed. They'd both agreed because he was such a good customer, but there was no doubt that there were negative feelings expressed towards him once he had left the shop.

"A little shopping you say?" he said with a sidelong glance at her. "I would be most obliged if you'd let me join you in your excursion, if you'd like the company." he wanted to spend time with her outside of the brothel, but opportunities didn't come up like this often when he had the time and she was without a client. He would never admit to being jealous of her other men, but at the same time he didn't like it either. He would sweep her away and care for her if only the social stigma wouldn't follow.

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missclara
2008-05-14 03:46 am UTC (link)

It wasn't that Clara was utterly oblivious to the cautioning words of Isobel and the other girls. Really, it was only good business sense to avoid developing a tendre for any one man. A light affection could be permitted, and certainly made the job easier, but anything more than that was setting yourself up for heartbreak. Clara knew this but found it difficult to remember the lesson in Grayson's presence. He was so kind, so good-natured and sincere, at times she would almost forget that there was anything financial about their relationship.

She realized unhappily that this random encounter could bring her unexpected pain. It was possible to remember the prescribed boundaries while they remained inside, but here out in the street in public? Clara was afraid that strolling casually with Grayson before all of New Shelby could start to feel natural. Her blue eyes flicked from his face to the street in front of her feet and back to him again, uncertain of what her response should be. Shopping seemed such an intimate activity, the sort of thing one would do with a sister or a wife. Despite the assent to his question that was poised on her lips, Clara found herself concerned for Grayson's reputation with far more anxiety than he seemed to be contemplating it at the moment.

"Are you sure?" Clara asked anxiously, unable to meet his eye. "I mean, I would welcome your company, of course I would, but..." her voice became softer and softer until it was indecipherable. Hoping Grayson would show his characteristic sensitivity and understand her unspoken concern, Clara glanced meaningfully to the left and right of them at the other people out for a stroll.

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banker_man
2008-05-14 05:06 am UTC (link)

Grayson, who although liked to spend money on Clara and give her gifts, never, ever, flaunted his money in front of her, so perhaps that's why he too, would forget about the financial part of their relationship. He always quietly left his payment in an intricate Oriental box that he'd purchased for her and asked for her to leave it on her bedside. He always paid her, placing the money in the box by her bed, before they really even engaged in much talking. He was a good man, and a trustworthy man. He'd always make good on payment. He never paid her what she charged, but more and though he wasn't making a point to say that he wanted to be able to do whatever he may, he did expect a certain amount of her time. His respect for her though was priceless, and it was what was important, as he expected respect back.

Grayson, who had always yearned for the type of intimacy he shared with Clara when they were together at the brothel, would often want to spend time laying with her after they'd been in the throes, for the urge to hold her afterwards was too great for him to ignore. He wasn't interested in getting up and leaving straight after as many men were, and frequently would hold her after they were finished, doting on her, as if she wasn't being paid, but was his lover. He knew every time he left though, that he treaded on dangerous ground. That he could get her in trouble, and yet he did it, because he cared so much for her.

As for the moment though, he appreciated her concern for what the other people would think. Grayson though, was feeling particularly brave today and honestly didn't mind. He sometimes forgot though, how his actions affected her, not meaning to of course, but he was a male and as in tune as he was with her, he was sometimes oblivious. And everybody knew that Grayson Whiteley could be occasionally fool hardy. "I am sure Miss Sörensen. And I understand." He said his deep voice quieting, sharing their secret in soft tones. He knew. He was okay though. "Unless you're shopping for things a lady wouldn't want a gentleman to see, and then of course, I shall give you your privacy." He said with another smile, just for her.

Some people, wouldn't consider Clara to be a lady. It was true that her profession came with stigma's that other women would never have to deal with, but Grayson always insisted she was more then that. She was more then a lady. She was to Grayson, perfect. And that wasn't to say he thought she had no flaws, because clearly that would be silly of him, as everybody had their negative points...but Gray still always thought the very best of Clara.

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missclara
2008-05-15 12:14 am UTC (link)

There was nothing subtle about Clara's relief at his response, a sigh escaped her lips that she had not realized she had been holding in. Grayson's steady voice and sympathetic words reassured her that accepting his offer would not be mere selfishness on her part. She did wonder at times where their unorthodox relationship could ever lead to, but schooled herself simply to concentrate on the pleasure she took from his company and her gratitude for his seeming unending generosity. Looking ahead to the future would certainly not bring her happiness, and Clara was determined to be cheerful today, sunshine or no. Her scruples now carefully laid aside, she brightened visibly and a small smile returned to her face.

His last remark produced a laugh but secretly Clara was touched that he could imagine a mere whore was entitled to the privacy that a lady would command. He was so different, so incredibly different, from the other men who patroned Reed’s House. It was easy to forget everything about her occupation when they were alone together. Too easy, perhaps.

"Hardly," she answered, her smile widening, "Something far more mundane. I was thinking more along the lines of fresh fruit or perhaps a bonnet. Certainly nothing so terribly thrilling as to require secrecy."

"Shopping was really only an excuse for a little fresh air," she concluded softly, almost more to herself than to him. It was an excuse to escape, really, but Clara chose not to reveal this fact to her companion. She was striving to set a light, carefree tone and take full advantage of this unanticipated meeting.

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banker_man
2008-05-15 04:53 pm UTC (link)

Grayson glanced at her when the sigh escaped her lips and smiled just slightly to himself. He knew that their time together was precious and few, he understood that. However, he himself liked to think that right now, just then, that she wasn't spending time with him because he was a customer. He had given her the opportunity to leave his side, by suggesting that she may want privacy with her purchases. He would have taken no offense if she would have agreed with him and parted ways. There was little Carla could do that would change his mind in his patronage towards her back at the brothel and he had always been adamant in her knowing that. He didn't want favors because she thought she'd loose him as a customer. Grayson was not that kind of man, and would never hold money over her.

As silly as it might be Grayson found himself to be fantasizing just slightly of the day where he could walk down the street, her arm in his and there was no stigma. A ring on her finger, her face flushed with delight because he called her his own. Of course, this was all in Grayson's mind and nowhere near what was actually going on. Clara would never, ever, be a 'mere whore' to him. He was different, possibly because he felt so strongly for Clara. He rarely let his mind wander to the possibility that she perhaps could just be a wonderful actress in fondness of him. He was deaf in one ear, a weak arm and hand that he could do very little with. He realized he was a cripple, but didn't like to think her kindness to him was out of pity.

"Ah, but you see a bonnet can be just as intimate to a woman as her most personal things. She may wear it outside, but to find the perfect one, well it takes time, careful consideration and selection. As for fruit well..." he couldn't help but smirk just the slightest, "Fruit, can be just as, if not more intimate, depending on who you plan on eating it in the company of." he thought to himself perhaps the next time he came to see Clara, he'd request some fruit, to perhaps...Oh no, he couldn't think of that.

"I understand how you feel. Spending all day in the bank, it can get to you eventually. Especially when it's usually so nice out." He replied with a nod. He considered asking Clara what her plans were for the evening, but he had already told his family he'd be home that that night. It was hard to find time in his schedule sometimes to make an appointment with her, but it was always well worth it. "How is your schedule this coming Sunday?" He inquired, softly, to keep the subject of their conversation to just them, turning his face to speak gently down in to her ear. New Shelby Trust would be closed and he'd have the day free.

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missclara
2008-05-16 03:19 am UTC (link)

It would not be apparent from the expression on Clara's slightly upturned face that she had ever experienced a single dismal moment, much less that only a few moments ago she had been acutely upset. Her eyes danced at Grayson's humorous musings about bonnets and the care purchases of them demanded. Despite her best attempts to look prim and proper when out in public, this mention of intimacy and fruit caused her to give her companion a decidedly interested look which seemed to linger inordinately long on his lips. A few years ago, had he made such a remark, Clara honestly thought she would have been in danger of blushing.

It struck her again how incredibly kind he was. That he should compare her workday to his respectable career as a banker touched her. As much as she cared for him, Clara did not feel that she understood Grayson fully. How could he be so kind to her, so solicitous? Surely, others must have discouraged him expending his charm—not to mention income and time—on a prostitute. She felt a surge of warmth for him just then and quickly looked away, relieved that he seemed to be leading the conversation as she felt herself quite tongue-tied.

The question brought a small smile to her face and was a welcome distraction from her bemused internal monologue. "Sunday?" She repeated thoughtfully, quickly considering her schedule. Two years at Reed's House made her able to answer the question without a trace of embarrassment, although she answered him in a voice as low as his had been. "Very free, I'm completely open anytime after five."

The truth of the matter was that she almost always found a way to make herself free in his case. It was in those circumstances that Isobel proved invaluable. "Will that suit you? I could always, err... move things around." Clara offered delicately, smoothing a piece of hair that had fallen into her eyes back behind her ears. She felt oddly vulnerable as soon as soon as these words were out of her mouth and distracted herself by gazing thoughtfully at bolts of fabric displayed in a storefront as they strolled by.

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banker_man
2008-05-16 08:27 pm UTC (link)

He perhaps thought that his mention of fruit would give her an idea for Sunday. Perhaps. If she didn't pick up on the cue, that was surely fine, but after all their time together, they were fairly understanding of what each other had on their minds. Her blushing though, was probably one thing that drew him to her in the beginning. They'd been companions for as long as Clara had been at the brothel. Grayson, had originally gone in at the advice of his father, who was a frequent customer at the establishment. Walking in, Gray had felt nervous about finding a suitable person for him to spend his time with. His father had no particular mind as to whom he visited, but Grayson wanted more then that. And he'd found Clara.

His father had been one of those people who had warned him. It was funny though, that the old man was warning him when he was the one who had told Gray to get himself involved in the place. Grayson had also made it clear that his father was not to ever become a patron of Clara's, once the two had gotten to know each other. The old man had been amused by this thinking his son was being ridiculous, but as the time went on, and Grayson became more and more involved with Clara, his father had taken him aside and warned him of what he was doing. Grayson, didn't care, that he would make sure that Clara was taken care of until the day she died, if or if he couldn't be with her in any capacity. And while she had wondered why he was so kind to her, Grayson had made an eternal promise, for he was a man of his word.

His voice had only been low out of respect to her and for the fact that nobody needed to know the business that was really just meant to be kept between the two of them. "After five will be fine Miss Sörensen." he said with a nod and smile. He didn't like to inconvenience her, but he also knew that sometimes when he wanted things, he wanted them as he pleased. She at least, understood that. He felt their odd long standing relationship warranted respect from both of them.

"You needn't move things around this time. Five is perfectly acceptable. Don't take an evening meal though, I'll bring us something. I'd like to have the rest of your evening too, if you don't mind." he said again quietly, but in a gentle voice, that was really something he only spoke in to her. He knew that she basically would assume that he'd take the rest of her night if he was coming so late. He felt the need to say it though, lest she had a customer who wanted to see her that evening as well.

He led them inside the store that had the fabric out front, as they had some of the prettiest bonnets around. He of course, intended on buying whatever her heart desired.

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missclara
2008-05-19 08:44 am UTC (link)

As if she ever minded! Clara wondered that he could still doubt her preference for his company over all the other men who frequented the brothel. Perhaps she was not so open about her feeling as she would wish to be, not wanting to overstep the proper boundaries of their conventionally improper relationship. Still, Clara knew that her face and voice nearly always betrayed the delight she took in his presence at Reed's House.

"I don't mind in the least," she said gently, wanting to communicate her sincere feelings without the risk of coming off too breathlessly enthusiastic. She was not a young girl experiencing her first crush after all, it would be foolish to appear as one, whatever she might feel. "On the contrary, having the entirety of Sunday evening with you will be something to look forward to." Despite her polite, controlled tone, Clara meant every word of this feverishly. Anticipating spending all of Sunday late afternoon and evening with Grayson would be just the encouragement she needed to bear the company of less pleasant male clients. She managed to refrain from telling him this, but couldn't help impulsively squeezing his shoulder with her free hand. Immediately regretting this sudden display of emotions, she quickly dropped her hand back to her side and glanced away, making sure no one had noticed the tiny betrayal of her feelings.

Deciding that a lighter note should be struck, Clara continued in a modified vein, her voice light cheerful and brisk. "And if you bring dinner too I will be eternally in your debt. I'm afraid there has been more than one culinary disaster of late at home."

The store's many wares on display were a welcome distraction. It was also a relief to be somewhat sheltered from the public eye; worrying about behaving indecently around Grayson was making her feel strung out and slightly nervous.

"Ostrich feathers!" She exclaimed with a laugh, bending forward slightly to examine the many bonnets arranged on the mahogany counter. "How extravagant, I'd be afraid of accidently catching fire from a chandelier."

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banker_man
2008-05-19 07:18 pm UTC (link)

Grayson was not one to hold things in when they were in just the company of the two of them. He was sure he overstepped the boundaries of their relationship on many occasion when they were together at Reed's House. The way he held her and kissed her, wasn't of a man who was just there to use her body. He was much more doting then that. And his words to her while they were spending time like that were never filtered. He was very open with her.

Grayson tried to never assume anything about anybody, knowing that most people were capable to do anything. He did not pretend to think that he knew that Clara would use their upcoming time together as something to look forward to that much. And surely not something she'd use to bare her time with other men. Grayson sometimes forgot, but wasn't completely unaware that some of the men that used the Brothel were not like himself. He tried not to think of Clara with other men because part of him still wanted to pretend that she didn't see others. That she was still all his own. It was too painful to think of her as somebody who saw many men that weren't just he. He had such strong feelings for her, it made it difficult. The other part of him didn't want to let him think he was all that special to her. Though he didn't think of that part often, preferring to indulge the former rather then the latter....but he knew this was her job. To be nice to him because he paid her so. All of this of course rarely stopped him from doing what he wanted.

Her display of affection did not go unnoticed, but he decided to not return to the gesture until they were inside of the shop and looking around at things. Following her like good gentlemen do when their lady friends are shopping he let her arm loose so she could shop properly. He clasped his hands behind his back as they wandered through the shop, stopping to look here and there. He laughed, "And we don't need you to catch on fire do we? Marring your perfect skin would be such a tragedy." he said softly in her ear, as he stood near. The shop keep was occupied in the back of the store and so Grayson let himself be caught for a moment, taking his hand and tracing from her neck down her back slowly with the back of his fingers.

Yes, that was risky, and yes, Grayson knew at any moment somebody could see, but he didn't care. He'd missed her as he'd been so busy lately he hadn't been able to call on her at Reeds House or otherwise. There was more to his attraction besides the fact that Clara was beautiful. He loved her soul as well.

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missclara
2008-05-20 06:34 am UTC (link)

Busy examining an equally extravagant bonnet with a wry smile, Clara did not instantly register Grayson’s close proximity. His breath was soft near her ear as he kindly paid his compliment and Clara had to resist spinning around and embracing him then and there. This little outing was going to prove unexpectedly difficult she decided, forcing her fingers to still against the table when all they wanted to do was twine behind Grayson's neck. She was silent, not trusting her voice, but tilted her head to regard him with a small smile for this praise. The sensation of his hand as it gently traced her neck and then moved downwards caused her to swallow suddenly and close her eyes for a single moment.

Impulsively she turned, grabbing his hand in hers and raised it to her lips to plant a quick kiss on the back of his hand. She dropped it almost as soon as her lips had brushed against the skin and quickly moved a few feet away, pretending to suddenly have a fascination for a fan that was on display. Two slipups in as many minutes! She castigated herself mentally, relieved that at least the storekeeper had been out of sight. Grayson might be permitted such little indulgences but she was determined that her behavior would be above reproof. She honestly did care about how he was viewed in the community, for his own sake and that of his family.

"Come look at this monstrosity," she called out softly over her shoulder to him, her voice normal, as if the previous intimacy had not occurred. The hat in question was indeed rather frightening with masses of fake flowers and pink lace. "Can you imagine? I think this one would be more likely to attract poor, confused bees than any admiration from human onlookers."

She took it gingerly from the table and held it in both of her hands, keeping her tone light even as she seemed to avoid meeting Grayon's eyes. "You would never buy such a thing, now would you?"

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banker_man
2008-05-20 07:30 am UTC (link)

Had she embraced him...he possibly would not have cared considering his current level of fascination of her and how he seemed to be in very much a irresponsible mood. He'd actually have probably embraced her back, kissing her, holding her. It's what he wanted to do just then. Her gentle smile of appreciation sent tingles in to his fingers and when her eyes fell shut at his caress he felt contented. There was nothing that made Grayson happier then seeing Clara enjoying something, if it was a purchase or primal: anything she took joy in, satisfied the man. He wished only that it was bare skin he had been touching, rather then the fabric of her dress.

His thoughts were interrupted though by her gracing his skin with a kiss. And though it was simple, fleeting and all together not enough for him, the place where her lips had brushed was searing hot. Grayson, of course knew this was his imagination but still. It was so risqué for them to be doing but he wanted to, and had to contain himself. Had to. Sunday was too long of a wait he felt. Sighing inwardly as he watched her go he really didn't mind she wasn't able to control herself around him in her affections. It fed his fantasy of her wanting to be with him outside of the paid walls of Reed's House. On a whole, it probably wasn't a good thing, but Gray would argue that.

He followed her over though, when she called him, the previous tension seemingly gone, at least from her end. It disappointed Grayson greatly, as he was really quite enjoying their teasing. "Possibly the bee's would just want to find the sweet woman wearing it." he said with a small chuckle. He studied it carefully though. There was a lot of work put in to it, obviously, but yes, he'd never have such poor taste. "Never would I expect a beautiful woman like yourself to wear such a hat. However..." he grinned, just slightly, and then picked up the hat from her hands and placed it on his own head.

"How do you think it looks on me?" He said quirking a brow, smirking. He was feeling silly and playful and he wanted her to feel the same. He didn't care if people saw him being silly. Intimate maybe, just a touch though he ignored it, but silly was okay with him. He could be silly and not mind in the least what people thought of him. He'd do about anything to make people smile, Clara included.

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