Nick Fury, Agent of S.A.N.T.A.
Characters: Nick Fury, children (unnamed) Setting: in front of the fireplace next to the Christmas Winter Holiday Tree Content: PRESENTS--I mean, the "mf" word. Repeatedly. Don't look so surprised. Summary: Nick Fury will visit you this Christmas night. "Threeeeee ghostsss will visssit youuuuuuu, motherfucker."
(11:23:41 PM) Moi: The Ghosts of Christmas with Samuel L. Jackson? (11:23:50 PM) MOD Ashley: looool yes. (11:24:01 PM) Moi: AWESOME (11:24:32 PM) Moi: I wouldn't mind Nick Fury showing up in my house. "I just climbed down tha muthafuckin CHIMBLEY. Now git me a beer!" (11:24:41 PM) MOD Ashley: Lolol (11:25:29 PM) Moi: "Uhm, Mister Fury sir?" "What?" "You're...blacker than usual." "Muthafuckin' chimbley ash. Don't you muthafuckas ever clean your muthafuckin' flue?!" (11:25:36 PM) Moi: At which point I would be laughing too hard to ask for presents. (11:25:41 PM) MOD Ashley: Ahahahaha (11:25:49 PM) Moi: Also a little intimidated (11:25:51 PM) Moi: But duuuude (11:25:57 PM) MOD Ashley: Lol you're awesome. Man. (11:26:03 PM) MOD Ashley: I'm just totally imagining this (11:26:05 PM) Moi: ty *blush* (11:26:06 PM) Moi: haha (11:26:48 PM) Moi: "Where's your sack of presents?" "Where's your muthafuckin' manners? Man's just flown halfway 'round the damn planet and you don't even offer him no cookies and milk? Muthafucka, are you fo'real!?" (11:29:04 PM) MOD Ashley: loool (11:30:17 PM) Moi: And then he'd sit down and tell the Night Before Christmas to all the children, and the next day, they'd open presents and declare themselves "BADASS MUTHAFUCKAS", as all of their presents were handguns and other various projectile weaponry. Disclaimer: I know chat transcripts are crappy and I am lazy. I'm sorry.