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Zach Kitano ([info]coalintodiamond) wrote in [info]nosuchtimes,
@ 2008-05-01 02:51:00

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Entry tags:adrienne conté, zach kitano

The History of Zach and Adrienne: Take 17
Who: Zach and Adrienne
When: Tuesday, March 6, 2007. Evening.
Where: The Upstairs Garden at the school.
What: Ten days after the fight, Zach finally asks to speak with Adrienne.

There was something peaceful about the upstairs garden in the school. A tamed jungle of plants and colors and scents that spoke of the natural world outside, even though the garden was indoors and secluded from the rest of the world. Zach’s eyes had gazed over the vibrant green scenery speckled with splashes of reds, yellows, blues, violets, pinks, and more. Sunlight from an evening sky pierced the glass ceiling, illuminating everything with a hue of gold. Something calming entered him as he stood there at the entrance, and Zach understood now more clearly than ever the things his father had taught him about philosophy and spirituality that he tended to forget in the midst of life.

He took off his shoes and socks, leaving them near the opening of the room and cuffing his jeans before he ventured further. Zach wanted to experience the garden naturally, but he also was taking a preventive measure to keep himself from being able to run off if he got upset or angry. Without his shoes, he couldn’t just get up and leave if his meeting with Adrienne didn’t go as smooth or calmly as he hoped it would. Recognizing his faults was key number one. Running away from problems was a fault.

Zach wasn’t going to run away from things anymore in an attempt to deal with them. At least he was trying, and this was the first time he’d ever really done that. Always running, Zach? Alicia teased him, but his sister’s eyes always looked sad when she said it. He was taught to run. Run, run, run away from people. They’d only hurt, only scar, only hate him. He’d had his own taste of it. If I have to lock you up in this house to protect you, I will do it! Untouchable his whole life with an invisible glass wall between him and the world.

He was open now, though, wasn’t he? The glass wall was gone with the people here, people like him. Laying his hand over a particularly large leaf, Zach felt so exposed out of his habitat, out of his home. This place was changing him, and like the sunlight pouring through the roof, he felt it pouring into him. Everything affected him, everything moved him, everyone got to him. It was simply . . . overwhelming.

He wandered around the garden, finally settling onto the ground by a small basin set up like a makeshift pond. Stones built the rim of the basin, only a few feet in diameter. Zach slipped his feet into the water — and waited. The events of Friday night were still fresh in his mind, and he remembered how he had planned to ask Adrienne on Saturday . . .

How it had fallen through with what she told him. Everything had fallen through because of that. Zach couldn’t really talk about it to anyone, not in detail, because the whole situation was too personal. So, no one knew exactly what was going on and everyone probably thought both of them were overreacting. Grounded where he sat, he couldn’t run away from the situation anymore.

Adrienne would be here soon.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 12:03 pm UTC (link)
Football went by in a blur to Adrienne and by the end of it all she was bruised and scratched and completely disheveled without really knowing how she got that way. She left practice early (but not before Starbuck forced her to eat another protein bar) to go back to her room for a few moments to herself. There she started to cry softly, fear wracking her entire body as she thought of all the possible (negative) outcomes of her meeting with Zach. It scared her beyond belief, so much so that she contemplated not going to meet him at all! But no good would come from taking that course; she had to face him and hear whatever it was he wanted to say even if it was all bad. Adrienne had never run away from her problems before choosing to face them with a strong heart and mind. But that changed after her first shift and she became a part of the supernatural world. She ran then... ran from her family, her friends, her life, and sought to create a new one at the school. But what sort of life could she hope if it began on a foundation of lies and fear?

She had begun to realize this when her feelings for Zach began to grow into something serious. Adrienne wanted him to be a part of her life, not just the one she had now, but the one she had left behind. She wanted her parents to know him and to accept him into their lives and to love him not because she loved him, but because he was wonderful enough to be loved. But her dream would have never been fulfilled had they kept on believing that she was dead. And so the young Were sought to right all the wrongs of her past and chose to take a stand once more.

So why could she barely do it now with the man that she loved?

Adrienne knew over the ten days that she was left to her thoughts and feelings what name to give the emotion she held for Zach. It was more than 'like' and so much more than being physically attracted to him. It was love... Adrienne was falling in love with Zach so deeply that their current rift wounded her more than she wanted to admit. But she didn't believe that he felt the same; how could he when he dismissed her so easily over the journals?

No... she had ruined everything with one stupid mistake and as she reached the upstairs gardens, freshly showered and dressed, she was silently preparing for the worst. She didn't look as wretched as she did earlier, this time choosing to wear a pair of jeans that were ripped on both knees and a black, long-sleeved shirt that contrasted against her unusually pale skin. Topping it all off was a brown, wrap sweater that she needed to protect against the sudden cold flashes she was recently experiencing.

The gardens were invigorating though. The bright colors and fresh scents were uplifting, and it was the next best thing to actually being outside of the castle's walls. Adrienne chose to stay on the path that wound through the greenery not wanting to trample on the grass with her sneakers. Besides, it was probably the fastest (and easiest) way to run into Zach, wherever he was.

"Maybe he didn't come..." she said to herself. She was almost happy about that, rejoicing in the fact that his absence meant a delay in him breaking things off with her. But further thought on the subject saddened her because as much as she feared what he was going to say, she wanted so badly to see him, to have a few moments alone with him away from everyone's prying eyes. And then she spotted him a few feet away by one of the small ponds that decorated the garden. His feet were dangling in the water and he just sat there... waiting. Waiting for her… waiting to break her heart. Adrienne bit back the tears that appeared and took a deep breath before she walked forward slowly. Her shoulders were drooped and her head lowered in a manner that displayed fear. If she were in her Were form, her ears would be drawn back, her tail would be lowered, and she would be approaching him in a careful crouch.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 12:06 pm UTC (link)
It was a very submissive posture, one that Adrienne was not used to. She had never submitted to anyone before but she didn't know what else to do in this situation. He had dismissed her so abruptly on Saturday during their chat, and then refused to answer her message to him on Sunday. And when he did answer one of her messages, he dismissed her once again. Combined with the tumult of emotions that Adrienne held in her heart at the moment, she just didn't feel confident enough to go into this conversation as aggressive as she normally would.

Besides, the ball was in his court now. It was up to Zach to decide what he wanted to do since he was the one who had decided to walk away and to take a break from her.

She had approached him silently and sat down a few feet away from him. She was trembling slightly from the fear she felt and from a shot of cold that coursed through her body. He looked so innocent and carefree sitting there - so eerily calm despite the fact that he must have wanted to yell at her. Adrienne pulled her knees to her chest and hugged them tightly with her arms. Her chin dropped to rest on the top of her knees, but her eyes never left Zach. She had missed him so much and seeing him outside of class now made her ache for him. She wanted to throw herself at him, cry into his lap and tell him she was sorry. But she couldn't... not when there was a chance he would push her away.

And so she stayed in her spot, eyes growing blurry from the threat of tears. She forced them back for now and tried to remember her advisor's words of advice. "...things often appear darkest before the dawn." Maybe this was one of those cases and she just to hope for the best. So Adrienne hoped that Zach would listen to her, and forgive her. She hoped that he wanted her as much as she wanted him. And she hoped that before their time together was over she would get the chance to tell him just exactly how she felt about him.

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 12:16 pm UTC (link)
Zach’s feet waved back and forth in the water, his mind utterly blank to an almost blissful level after the events of the past few days. The clamor of emotions in his head finally fell silent as he sat by himself and let his mind relax. His palms pressed down into the grass around him, his eyes focused on the water. They caught the sight of someone approaching, and Zach glanced up to see Adrienne here at last.

Her posture, her clothing, her expression, and even the change of tone in her skin and the fact that it looked like she had lost weight all bothered him. Adrienne hadn’t been taking care of her health — or he was so wrong and the bite had hurt her, hadn’t it? Was this why she wasn’t in class on Monday? He told one of their teachers, their teacher found her, and she was hurt? Why would she have been so casual about it in their chat when she had told him, so dismissive? Amused, even?

Had he been wrong in the circumstances? Had he said those things to her out of line? Missing from view since Saturday, emerging with a look like this, and as she curled her arms around her legs, Zach felt a surge of self-hate and guilt. Wait, think, he told himself. Adrienne said she was bitten on Wednesday . . . Valentine’s Day, by the calendar. She’d been fine until their fight. Was she the one feeling guilty, then? She had asked Rafe to bite her, he remembered with a sting in his chest. Where? Zach couldn’t remember.

These doubts, where did they come from? Before Adrienne came along, he thought he liked Katrina. Katrina had bitten him, had drank from him, and had tended to him afterwards to make sure he was safe. She had clouded his thoughts for days. Zach had wanted Katrina in that way once before, hadn’t he? He touched Katrina’s chest, felt her heartbeat, and thought of how his blood helped her live and how it made an invisible connection between them . . . hadn’t it?

Adrienne . . . had she had that with Rafe? It scared him that maybe she did. Perhaps he had no right to be jealous, but it was there and he doubted his standing in Adrienne’s eyes. The timing is what ruined everything. Zach had met them both around the same time, and he had to sort out the truth of his feelings. He had done just that, his feelings leading him towards Adrienne. Never had he pursued anything with Katrina. Zach’s feelings had grown for Adrienne, and Katrina never became anything more than his friend. There were no lingering desires for Katrina, not like that. After his feelings for Adrienne had already grown and he and Adrienne were on the brink of a real relationship, Adrienne sought someone to bite her. The timing. It was the timing that was all off.

Zach doubted her now because of his own uncertainty he had felt when he first met her. He doubted her, and he couldn’t help it.

Glancing up away from the gaze of her eyes, he focused his sights on the tall treetops around the school and the falling sun hanging over the canopy of green beyond the glass. This garden was like him in a way. Viewing the world, but never a part of it. No words punctuated the silence, and Adrienne spoke not a single thing in the quiet around them. Was it up to him to speak?

Zach decided the truth was best.

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 12:17 pm UTC (link)
Shrugging off his jacket, he laid it aside on the ground. He pulled up his sweater sleeve enough to expose his left forearm. In the very middle halfway between his wrist and elbow, two scars — puncture marks from fangs — fully healed and obtained on his second night here at the school were plainly visible for her eyes.

“My second night here,” he said softly, his voice eerily calm, “before I ever talked to you or met you. I was terrified, more than I had ever been in my life. I struggled, yelled. Almost passed out. Couldn’t even move much at all.” He lowered his arm, pulling down his sleeve. “She stopped. She bandaged me. Out of the terror, I . . . was mesmerized. Fascinated by her.” He almost choked on the next words, but he said them. “Attracted to her.” It was all making sense now, his reaction.

“Then,” he said, his voice even more quiet, “I met you . . . ” Zach looked down at the water, still now that his feet weren’t swaying around in it. The next words came out like ghosts of his thoughts, bringing forth the very thing he worried most of all.

“Did you feel that then . . . for Rafe?”

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 12:29 pm UTC (link)
There was an upsurge of anger and jealousy in Adrienne’s chest. Who had bitten him? Some random vampire in the school? One that he was attracted to? The only vampire Adrienne knew that Zach hung out with was Katrina… was it her? Had he let Katrina bite him? And he was going to chastise her for what happened with Rafe?! She took a deep breath and glanced at Zach as a new pain entered her heart. It would have been jealousy had he not said “Then I met you… Adrienne stilled the rage inside and cleared her mind. He had met Katrina or whoever first… had those feelings for them briefly because she bit him. And then he met…

Adrienne swallowed slowly to dissipate the anger only to have it replaced with shock at Zach’s question. “Did you feel that then… for Rafe?” Feel what for Rafe? Attraction? Fascination? The way he felt for whoever it was that bit him? The idea was absolutely absurd and Adrienne would have laughed out loud were she not so taken back by the thought. She simply trained her eyes on Zach trying to make sense out of it all. Was this the reason he was angry at her? Because he thought that she was interested in someone else? If only he knew what she felt for him, and only him he wouldn’t have questioned her at all. But he didn’t and the assumptions that ran rampant in his head drove him away from her.

Maybe he did have feelings for her if he felt jealousy over the act. But Adrienne didn’t understand why a bite would mean she was attracted to Rafe, or how it would even make her feel that way afterwards. Rafe’s bite hurt her, more than she told Zach that first day. Maybe if she had spoken about it more seriously she wouldn’t be in this situation with Zach right now. That was her mistake, too, as so many things were these days.

Adrienne lifted her head to look at Zach and furrowed her brow in confusion. “Why would I…” she began before she released her knees slightly. “Why would you think that? Don’t you even realize how I feel about you?” She crossed her legs to sit Indian style and rested her elbows on her knees and let her head fall forward. She couldn’t stop the tears this time as they fell to her jeans.

“You don’t know how scared I was… it was stupid of me to ask him to bite me, to trust that he could pull back without drinking. But he did and I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t like it even though you probably think I did…” She sniffled and wiped at the tears on her cheeks without looking up. “I didn’t want to worry you… I thought if I didn’t make a big deal out of it you wouldn’t either, so I joked about it even though it was the worst thing I could have let happen.” She bit her lower lip as the tears flowed a little harder now and a shudder wracked through her body. “He didn’t stop when I told him too… I had to tell him twice before he pulled back. By then though I had…” she swallowed and looked up at Zach with teary eyes. Her heart was about to jump out of her chest at the words she was about to say. She was so scared, so afraid of his reaction that she wanted to turn and run. But her legs didn’t have the strength now and so she sat there.

“I started to shift, Zach. It wasn’t the full moon and I was shifting…” Her lips were quivering and it started to get harder for her to talk. She pulled her knees back to her chest to give her something to hold onto or else she would fall apart right then and there. Pieces of Adrienne scattered to the ground without anyone to put her back together again. Her head dropped to her knees but she continued to talk. “It took every ounce… of strength… I had… to not shift completely…” she managed to say in between the heaving of her tears. “And even then it wasn’t enough…” She swallowed the lump in her throat and lifted her head to wipe at her tear stained cheeks. “Not until I thought of you… and everything I felt for you.” She looked away sadly as tears silently steamed down her face.

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 12:41 pm UTC (link)
Zach couldn’t hear her scathing thoughts, which was a good thing. Had he heard them, he would have flinched and not wanted to hear anymore and got up to run away all over again. Regret would have filled him for what he revealed and everything he said. No, he hadn’t named any names, but he hadn’t thought she would jump to the conclusion of assuming Katrina. Zach knew a lot of vampires here, but it was true he had only really told Adrienne about Katrina.

Don’t you even realize how I feel about you? He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came forth. Before he had any time to accumulate his thoughts on the matter, Zach saw the tears falling from her face. Wait, no. What was going on? Did he make her cry with what he had said?

Zach pulled his feet out of the water, settling them on the stones and wrapping his arms around his legs. Fear filled him that he had done the wrong thing. He’d said too much. Why had he told her? She didn’t need to hear that. It didn’t serve any purpose, and it was wrong wrong wrong of him to say. Could he do nothing right?

In silence he listened to everything she had to say to him about what had happened, about the bite, about Rafe. Zach simply didn’t know how to react to any of it. He’d gotten it all wrong, and what did she think of him now? Something horrible had happened to her — but she asked him to bite her! his mind screamed at him as if it were an injustice to think otherwise — and he told his story and she probably thought he did it for kicks or something like that. And her shift? And her feelings for him? How could thinking of him make it stop? But it had, according to her. It had.

No words would come forth about what happened to her. Zach couldn’t get anything out, even though his mouth tried to move as if words would come, as if they were waiting to be said. There was nothing, though. Adrienne cried and wiped her tears, and his bottom lip trembled so much he had to bite it to make it stop. Hugging his own legs, he mirrored her actions in complete unawares.

“I had just arrived here,” he said, trying to keep his voice from shaking. “I didn’t know any of these things existed. I didn’t believe in the people who live here. They weren’t real. They were just fairytales out of a book. She said she was a vampire, and I laughed. Who says they’re a vampire? Vampires didn’t exist. So, I thought she was lying, pulling a joke, wearing fake fangs out of a cereal box.” He was speaking so fast, telling her the full story and the truth. His voice didn’t stop shaking.

“And I — I thought it was bullshit, so I held out my arm and dared her to bite me if she was such a vampire. She actually bit me, and it hurt and I was scared and I yelled at her to stop, but she didn’t stop until I almost passed out. I jerked my arm away from her and fell down, but . . . but she helped me. She carried me to my room and she bandaged my arm, and she stayed until I was asleep. She kept asking me if I was alright, and . . . ” Zach’s teeth clenched, fearing Adrienne’s thoughts and not knowing them. “It wasn’t the bite that made me attracted to her, okay? I got upset over you and Rafe because — because biting and drinking someone’s blood is an intrusion to their body, and you acted like it was nothing and you asked him knowing he was a vampire. I didn’t know what was going to happen to me, and you’ve been here and you know vampires are real! I didn’t know what to think—” Zach was noticeably upset, the pained expression on his face and his tone clearly revealing that.

“Letting someone bite you and drink your blood . . . ” He looked like he was trying to make sense of it. His eyes rose to hers, incredulous. “It’s personal, Adrienne. It’s not something you share. It felt like you betrayed me. You asked him, knowing what to expect. Vampires drink. And you were so light about it—” His voice hitched, and if it weren’t for his willpower refusing to shed tears, he might have done so. “So joking. So playful, and I . . . I . . . ” The words stopped again, his mouth wide open and nothing coming out.

“What was I supposed to think?” he finally asked, his voice so quiet and hur

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 12:42 pm UTC (link)
Zach couldn’t hear her scathing thoughts, which was a good thing. Had he heard them, he would have flinched and not wanted to hear anymore and got up to run away all over again. Regret would have filled him for what he revealed and everything he said. No, he hadn’t named any names, but he hadn’t thought she would jump to the conclusion of assuming Katrina. Zach knew a lot of vampires here, but it was true he had only really told Adrienne about Katrina.

Don’t you even realize how I feel about you? He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came forth. Before he had any time to accumulate his thoughts on the matter, Zach saw the tears falling from her face. Wait, no. What was going on? Did he make her cry with what he had said?

Zach pulled his feet out of the water, settling them on the stones and wrapping his arms around his legs. Fear filled him that he had done the wrong thing. He’d said too much. Why had he told her? She didn’t need to hear that. It didn’t serve any purpose, and it was wrong wrong wrong of him to say. Could he do nothing right?

In silence he listened to everything she had to say to him about what had happened, about the bite, about Rafe. Zach simply didn’t know how to react to any of it. He’d gotten it all wrong, and what did she think of him now? Something horrible had happened to her — but she asked him to bite her! his mind screamed at him as if it were an injustice to think otherwise — and he told his story and she probably thought he did it for kicks or something like that. And her shift? And her feelings for him? How could thinking of him make it stop? But it had, according to her. It had.

No words would come forth about what happened to her. Zach couldn’t get anything out, even though his mouth tried to move as if words would come, as if they were waiting to be said. There was nothing, though. Adrienne cried and wiped her tears, and his bottom lip trembled so much he had to bite it to make it stop. Hugging his own legs, he mirrored her actions in complete unawares.

“I had just arrived here,” he said, trying to keep his voice from shaking. “I didn’t know any of these things existed. I didn’t believe in the people who live here. They weren’t real. They were just fairytales out of a book. She said she was a vampire, and I laughed. Who says they’re a vampire? Vampires didn’t exist. So, I thought she was lying, pulling a joke, wearing fake fangs out of a cereal box.” He was speaking so fast, telling her the full story and the truth. His voice didn’t stop shaking.

“And I — I thought it was bullshit, so I held out my arm and dared her to bite me if she was such a vampire. She actually bit me, and it hurt and I was scared and I yelled at her to stop, but she didn’t stop until I almost passed out. I jerked my arm away from her and fell down, but . . . but she helped me. She carried me to my room and she bandaged my arm, and she stayed until I was asleep. She kept asking me if I was alright, and . . . ” Zach’s teeth clenched, fearing Adrienne’s thoughts and not knowing them. “It wasn’t the bite that made me attracted to her, okay? I got upset over you and Rafe because — because biting and drinking someone’s blood is an intrusion to their body, and you acted like it was nothing and you asked him knowing he was a vampire. I didn’t know what was going to happen to me, and you’ve been here and you know vampires are real! I didn’t know what to think—” Zach was noticeably upset, the pained expression on his face and his tone clearly revealing that.

“Letting someone bite you and drink your blood . . . ” He looked like he was trying to make sense of it. His eyes rose to hers, incredulous. “It’s personal, Adrienne. It’s not something you share. It felt like you betrayed me. You asked him, knowing what to expect. Vampires drink. And you were so light about it—” His voice hitched, and if it weren’t for his willpower refusing to shed tears, he might have done so. “So joking. So playful, and I . . . I . . . ” The words stopped again, his mouth wide open and nothing coming out.

“What was I supposed to think?” he finally asked, his voice so quiet and hurt.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 12:47 pm UTC (link)
She stared at him intensely, pale eyes crossing the distance that seemed so far at that moment. He was telling her about his bite and while initially her reaction was anger and jealousy, hearing it again she felt none of those things. He was being honest with her and she appreciated that. But the truth was it didn’t matter to her because it was in the past, nothing he did or she did could change that, like she couldn't change that fact that she had stupidly asked Rafe to bite her.

Just because Adrienne knew that vampires were real didn't stop her curiosity about the sharpness of their teeth. Yes it was stupid and she didn't think it through, but she didn't want to be punished for it for the rest of her life. She didn't even try to speak when Zach was talking - she wanted him to finish. She wanted to hear everything he had to say.

"Letting someone bite you and drink your blood... it's personal, Adrienne. It's not something you share. It felt like you betrayed me."

His words pierced her heart like an arrow. She finally understood why he was upset. If she thought the act was one of betrayal she would have felt the same way. But Adrienne didn’t think of the bite as personal. She didn't ask him to do it because she liked him in any way. How could she have any feelings for Rafe when she completely belonged to Zach? If there was anything that was an act of intrusion in Adrienne's eyes it was the fact that he drank her blood without her permission. Did Zach not understand that she didn’t want Rafe to go that far, that it scared her and instead of pulling away she was locked in place because of the shock? Did he not hear her when she said she almost shifted? Didn’t he care that she was hurt?

“I let him bite me but I did not want him to drink from me at all, especially not like I was fucking water fountain like he was doing.” She rose to her feet quickly the blood rushing to her head caused her to sway with dizziness. She closed her eyes for a moment to regain her balance. “It was a mistake, Zach. I was stupid, okay. I'm dumb… idiotic… a fucking moron for actually trusting that he could just bite and be done with it. But never have I ever thought that biting and drinking blood were personal acts. You think that if I believed that or if I knew you felt that way that I would have gone through with it anyway?” Adrienne shook her head as the tears continued to fall. She wondered how she still had any left considering how much she had cried over the past week and a half. “I hate myself for letting it happen, and I hate myself even more for doing this to us.” She was scared right now… so scared that he was just going to walk away from her and she’d lose him forever. Her voice calmed some as she continued to explain.

“If I was playful about it when I told you it was because I didn’t want you to worry. I didn’t want you to know that I had started to shift without a full moon. Because then what would you think of me? That I really was just a monster and then you wouldn’t want to have anything to do with me… I didn’t want to scare you away from me… I lo-” Adrienne stopped mid-word to wipe at tears that would only be replaced by more in a few seconds. It was a futile act really, but she continued to do it as if it would make her stop crying. “I didn’t know that you felt betrayed by me…” Her knees gave out from underneath her and she fell down upon them weakly. If there was anything that Adrienne hated more than people betraying her, it was if they ever thought that she betrayed them. She was disgusted with herself suddenly and she wouldn’t have blamed him if he left her. “I never wanted to hurt you…” She whispered sadly. She could taste the salt in her tears as she cried steadily, her eyes staring blankly ahead of her as she spoke. “I’d rather die than hurt you... I’m sorry…” Her voice lowered to a whisper as her neck folded forward.

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 12:53 pm UTC (link)
No challenge met him at his words. Zach felt himself relaxing, calming at the relief of speaking something personal that he had kept from her. No, it didn’t affect their current relationship or his feelings for her. Yet the act had happened, and the irony of both of them being bitten by vampires failed to go unnoticed by him. There was something liberating in telling her the truth of his own story, the full story and not just pieces of a puzzle that she could take and use to formulate her own picture.

“You let him bite you,” Zach said simply and softly, and it wasn’t accusing. It was matter-of-fact, simple — a statement of truth and nothing more. “He was going to drink, whether you wanted him to or not.” Anyone knew that, even Adrienne should have known that. “A bite’s a bite,” he added, his voice losing its steadiness once more. “Why would you have wanted it? You were—” He choked on the words, unable to finish his sentence. She was a werewolf. She was attacked once and mauled, as all werewolves were, though maybe not all of the other were-creatures — and she wanted to be bitten to test the sharpness of teeth? Her claim hadn’t made any sense to him, and it still didn’t make sense now. None at all.

Zach couldn’t wrap his mind around it. It was like someone beating beaten badly once before in their life and then asking someone to hit them one day out of the blue because they wanted to know how it felt. Adrienne’s action made absolutely no sense to him, especially not if her curiosity was over the sharpness of teeth. “I just don’t understand how it can be about sharp teeth. You’re a werewolf, Adrienne. You were attacked once by another werewolf and—” And bitten and ripped open and mauled and blood was everywhere, wasn’t it? With wide eyes and a furrowed brow, he shook his head and stopped his words. His hand covered his mouth, inhibiting him from saying anything else.

No, he didn’t really want to go there or bring that up. It would only make her more upset. Zach put his hands on the sides of his head, just wanting to disappear. So much at once — too much at once. Pounding within the recesses of his skull, a headache had begun to form in his head.

“I don’t care if you almost shifted, Adrienne. I don’t care. It doesn’t matter—” He looked up. Seeing her like this made his chest ache with a physical pain, and he wanted it to stop. He wanted this to stop. “Adrienne, I have feelings for you I haven’t felt for anyone before and I don’t care if you’re a werewolf and I don’t care what you think that means for you or for me. How many times do I have to say you aren’t a monster? You’re not. You’re Adrienne.” Zach didn’t know where the words were coming from anymore, and he couldn’t control them, couldn’t stop them at this point. “I just didn’t . . . I don’t . . . ” His voice was small and quiet again.

Zach clutched his head again. His wet feet felt cold in the cool air of the garden. “I don’t know what you see in me,” he said simply, shaking his head.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 12:58 pm UTC (link)
"But he said he wouldn't..." Adrienne mumbled in defense. Maybe she was naive to believe that it was possible for a vampire to not drink once they bit into flesh. Maybe in that sense she was truly and utterly stupid. But there really wasn't any other reason for her asking to be bitten other than morbid curiosity. She watched him with blurred vision, watched as he tried to make sense of her mistake. Sometimes though things just didn't make sense no matter how much you wanted them to.

She saw where he was going with his logic. Why would anyone who was attacked once before want to be attacked again. It made sense when he said it and her own reasons began to seem less credible. But those were the only reasons she had because those were the reasons she had given herself at the time of the bite. There was nothing other than wanting to compare, but he just didn't seem to understand and she wasn't sure if she could make him understand.

"I know it doesn't make sense, my reasons I mean. They don't really make sense to me now. But that night that was the only thing I was thinking, that I wanted to see how sharp they were because I knew how sharp my teeth could be. When shifted, my teeth can bite through flesh and bone. I was only thinking of comparing... I swear. It sounds so stupid now when I say it out loud," she shook her head and managed a small, but sad, smile. "It was a mistake."

Her next words were spoken slowly and deliberately. "I know I was attacked once. He bit me right here," she indicated to the area that ran from her left shoulder up to her neck. "I know you've seen the scar. It reminds me everyday of what happened to me." She let out a rueful chuckle. "To think that one moonlit walk changed my entire life." She ran her fingers through her hair and let out another sad laugh. "Wanna know something I've never told anyone? The scout that brought me to Halcyon told me that the werewolf who bit me had done it on purpose. That he had been following me for months before he attacked, and that they knew he'd eventually come for me." She laughed again almost insanely this time. She hadn't thought about her attack in so long that it felt almost surreal to talk about it again, especially since she had never told anyone else her story.

"I stayed at work late on the night of my first full moon. I was trapped inside the building when I shifted. I saw it happening in the mirror before I doubled over in pain." Tears were rolling down her cheeks again as she retold her tale. "Do you know what happens during a shift? Your bones break and realign. You feel like you're crawling out of your skin, like you're dying only to be reborn as a wolf. I couldn't deal with it that night... I dug my claws into myself... I tried to hurt - " she swallowed hardly, trying to push down the shame of her next words. "I tried to hurt myself. That's why my blood was everywhere that night. Why they believed that I was dead. In that moment then though...I wished I was..."

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 01:01 pm UTC (link)
Adrienne's eyes were starting to hurt from all of the tears they had shed. She wiped at them gently and sniffled softly. She was a mess and she was tired and she just wanted all of this to stop. She wanted to lay down and close her eyes and have everything be okay when she woke up. But things were never that simple. Her heart hurt so much as she sat there, but Zach's next words alleviated some of her pain and worry.

"I have feelings for you I haven't felt for anyone before."

"I don't care if you're a werewolf."

"You're Adrienne."

She could have flung herself into his arms at that moment if she weren't so weak from everything that had happened the past week or so and right then with Zach in the garden. He had feelings for her... whether or not they were like what she had for him was yet to be seen but maybe, just maybe, it would be okay to tell him. They were being honest with each other after all, and he deserved to know how he made her feel.

"Zach..." It occurred to her suddenly that she really didn't know how to explain her feelings to him. With her luck it would come out a jumbled mess and he wouldn't understand what she was trying to say. "Zach you... you make me happy in a way that no one else has ever been able to. You... because of you I'm actually happy that I was attacked and that I'm a werewolf because if I wasn't I would never have come here and I'd never have met you." She licked her lips slowly, her throat painfully dry as she spoke. "You're so sweet and kind... you care about me in a way that no one else ever has. You make me smile, and laugh. You're smart and I can have conversations with you. You like to go camping and hiking like I do. You're cute and handsome and so attractive and you're so gentle with me. You make me feel so special..." She stopped when she realized that she was rambling and for the first time in their meeting, she blushed.

"Zach... You ground me when I start to lose control. You give me strength when I think that I can't go on. You... I've... I'm ..." She paused and took a deep breath. "I'm falling for you, Zach. And it scares me that I've ruined this for us because I don't... I don't want to be without you."

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 01:08 pm UTC (link)
But he said he wouldn’t. Rafe. The one that Zach hated so much right now. Rafe, Rafe, Rafe. Was he playful with Adrienne? What did he do before he bit her? What did he say? Did she laugh and giggle? Did her eyes shine as a coy smile danced on her lips? Zach didn’t expect the upsurge of hate and anger and jealousy he suddenly felt. He pushed it back, took calming deep breaths, and forced himself to listen to Adrienne.

“Is he in trouble?” Zach asked, suddenly finding a brief moment in which he could be calm. A student deserved to be punished for drinking from another student. Rafe deserved to be punished for drinking from Adrienne, for biting her. Never in a million years would Zach concede that Katrina deserved any punishment, but he wanted to see Rafe suffer at the hands of it. Besides, he’d told on Rafe and he’d never tell on Katrina. “Did they kick him out of the school? Is he gone?”

And if they’d done nothing? If they let a student get away with harming the life of another student? What sort of school allowed that? How would Zach react, then? Would he trust the faculty? It struck him, then — a faculty full of vampires, weren’t they? Of course, they would side with a vampire student. Sympathize. Understand. Oh, he couldn’t help himself, they’d say. Did they not care that a student could have died? That more than one could have died because of this?

Zach didn’t understand. He couldn’t wrap his mind around it, and it only made his head hurt more. Certainly, each faculty member had killed in their lifetime. Stolen life. Oh, they’d be more concerned with cleaning up spilled milk than spilled blood. They’d probably lick up spilled blood, wouldn’t they? What if a student tried to kill him? Would they care? They’d be more concerned with his missed homework assignment the next day . . .

Zach couldn’t understand. He tried and tried, and he couldn’t understand.

He kept quiet as he heard her words and her explanations. Adrienne sounded truthful as she told him about the curiosity on teeth, and maybe it was true. When shifted, my teeth can bite through flesh and bone. Resting his chin on his arms, he took the words in without questioning them. I was only thinking of comparing... I swear. It sounds so stupid now when I say it out loud. Adrienne wouldn’t lie about that; she wouldn’t. Her voice was so innocent, and it calmed the rage he was trying so hard to suppress.

He flinched, though, as she told him about her attacker. More jealousy and possessiveness surged up at yet another tale of a man after Adrienne. The werewolf who had bitten her and changed her, and he was still alive? No one had run him through with silver? Zach’s eyes burned, though no tears fell or glistened from them. Adrienne’s unstable laugh shook him even further. He was supposed to be calming down. Why was the opposite happening?

Adrienne told him about shifting, and it hurt him more to listen to it. All of this pain, and he didn’t want to deal with it anymore. He wanted this to stop. Just to stop . . .

Zach buried his face in his arms as they were wrapped around his knees, clutching at the sweater on his back and shoulder as he listened to her yet again. He was hearing Adrienne’s feelings, all of them pouring out at once. There were so many ways he could have reacted, but he couldn’t make sense of anything right now. He didn’t know what to say, and he didn’t know what to do . . .

His body shook silently, and he couldn’t stop it. His mouth felt glued at the back, and if he tried to move it, it hurt like hell.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 01:11 pm UTC (link)
Adrienne wasn't thinking about Rafe or what had happened to him. The only thing on her mind was Zach and it was killing her that she couldn't crawl over to him to hold him. She needed him... wanted him... but he seemed so far away from her right now. She barely registered the questions about Rafe that Zach asked her because her mind so filled with other thoughts. It took a moment to answer, but when she did it was barely answered anything at all!

"I don't care about Rafe..." her voice was quivering slightly. "I don't know and I really don't care." And at that moment she didn't. She and Rafe had exchanged words over the journals on Sunday and it was only then that she asked him how he was but only out of being polite because he asked first. Adrienne took responsibility for her part in the bite, but there was a part of her that hated Rafe for not being able to stop. She wanted him to get into trouble, too, but that wasn't up to her was it?

Zach wasn't the only one angry about the fate of Adrienne's attacker. She too still felt bitter towards the same people who had saved because they had failed to capture and punish the werewolf that bit her. There were times she thought that maybe they wanted her to get bitten just so they could feel good about 'saving' another newly turned Were. Adrienne buried those feelings the best she could but they hadn't vanished completely. Telling Zach her story made them resurface and caused her insane laugh.

But her admission of feelings calmed her again, it brought her back from the pain that lingered inside. Zach was so important to her and her feelings for him had taken her captive. She was at his mercy despite the fact that she hated being so vulnerable. In any other situation she would have stated her point fiercely without backing down, but it was different now. She was scared and only Zach could save her from the darkness that threatened to engulf her from within.

"You're the only one I want..." she whispered as she pushed herself to stand. Dizziness overcame her for a moment before she took a step toward Zach. He was just sitting there, hugging his knees and shaking from what Adrienne imagined was just an overflow of emotions. "Say something," she demanded in a soft tone. "I know you're mad at me, so yell at me or something. Anything!" Her voice shook but she kept going.

"Here I am baring my soul to you when running away would be easiest. But I promised you once that I wouldn't run away from you. Hell, I don't want to run away from you. You mean so fuckin' much to me, Zach. Why can't you see that?"

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 01:16 pm UTC (link)
Zach did want to yell. He wanted to yell, and he wanted to hit something. Just like he had knocked the lamp off his end table that day when she first told him, bursting the bulb on his carpet. His foot had kicked the object across the room. All of the negative energy and emotions flowing through him drove his fists to clench and his jaw to clench and every joint to seize up tightly.

He kept thinking how he didn’t want Rafe anywhere near her ever again. He’d never felt such feelings, so he didn’t know where they came from or why. If he had to stand between the two of them like a brick wall, he would do so and find a way to be successful. After all, he was dealing with a vampire, but he’d guard Adrienne. Zach could fight just like any other man despite his size, and he would do it in a heartbeat here.

What had possessed him at that moment, he couldn’t say. Jumping to his feet, Zach finally did yell. “Stop!” he shouted, shaking all over. Confusion clouded his brain, and he couldn’t tell which way was up and which way was down. What was going on? Why was he acting this way? Why did he feel this way? He would have calmed and finally done something, but Adrienne kept talking. Zach tried to find a moment to think, but he couldn’t with all of the words he had to take in that she spoke. “Just stop,” he muttered weakly, running his hands through his hair.

Zach was only a boy. He was a fourteen-year-old trapped in an eighteen-year-old body, and he had enough trouble trying to make sense of his own life. Everyone expected him to be older, expected him to get things or understand things when he simply didn’t know the first thing about them. Small steps, small steps. He couldn’t leap over a ravine. He couldn’t climb a mountain. He couldn’t swim across an ocean.

He had to take his time with each and every step, or he’d fall flat on his face.

Zach stared at her with wide and tumultuous eyes, trying to make sense of everything. As he looked at her, all of his energy seemed to drain from him. Never had he heard anyone say such words to him before. Was he capable of making someone feel that way? He cared about Adrienne and he had feelings for her, he knew that. To what extent, though, he didn’t know. Zach wanted to reach out and touch her, make sure she was actually there. Everything was beginning to feel like a dream — good dreams and bad dreams, but mostly just one big dream.

Closing the distance between them, he wasn’t quite sure what people did in these types of situations. He only knew what he wanted to do. Without saying anything, because his throat still ached from the stiffness in his jaw and aside from those three spoken words he really didn’t want to say anything more, Zach slowly wrapped his arms around Adrienne’s shoulders and hugged her to him. His hand found her hair, laying upon it and brushing it gently. After a few moments of silence, he finally spoke.

“I don’t wanna be with anyone but you,” Zach mumbled quietly beside her ear.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 01:17 pm UTC (link)
Adrienne stared at him with wide eyes when he yelled at her to stop. She paused in her steps, her feet suddenly unable to move at all. Not forward... not back. She was frozen to her spot and she feared that her words were in vain. Zach didn't want to hear those things from her because he probably didn't feel the same. She felt her heart breaking at the assumption she made and her heartache displayed itself upon her face.

She didn't know what to do or say. Her eyes were raining tears once more and she blamed herself for saying too much, for putting herself on the line only to get hurt. But Zach was worth it, wasn't he? He meant the world to her and she'd sacrifice herself for him if only it let him see just how much she cared. But it was too late now, wasn't it?

Adrienne was lost in her own thoughts when Zach made his way toward her. She was too busy wallowing in her own self-pity that it wasn't until the last moment did she realize that Zach had wrapped his arms around her. She tensed up, scared and unsure as he hugged her close to his body. Adrienne didn't understand what was happening. Wasn't he angry with her a minute ago? Why was he hugging her now?

Adrienne melted in his embrace after a few moments when he brushed her hair with his hand. She was crying softly onto his shoulder for those few moments of silence they shared. This was all she needed ... no, he was all she needed. She needed and wanted to feel his embrace and now that he was holding her she didn't want him to let go. Her hands reached around his waist, slowly... hesitantly. Afraid that maybe it was wrong to do so. But when he didn't pull back she reached all the way around and held onto him tightly.

"I'm so sorry," she whimpered as she cried a little bit harder onto his shoulder. It would be another minute before she had the composure to say anything else as she nuzzled against him. "You're the only one I want to be with, too. It's always been you, Zach." She swallowed and pulled her head away from his shoulder to look up at him. How she missed his face... his scent... everything about him. She never wanted to lose him... never.

Her hand reached up between them to touch his face gingerly as if testing to make sure that the moment was real. Adrienne's eyes were still sad as she spoke this time, her voice soft and quiet and almost childlike. "Can you forgive me?"

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 01:22 pm UTC (link)
Holding her in a hug so close to him calmed him down, allowed him to take the rein with his emotions and reel them in where they ceased to be destructive anymore. Fear had paralyzed him the past few days that she hadn’t wanted just him, that she had wanted another as well. Zach had let himself go with her, let himself trust her — something he’d never let himself do before, not in that way and not with these feelings. He hadn’t even physically touched a girl in the past three years the way he had with Adrienne: nothing sexual or romantic with kisses, holding of hands, or touches. If he had done them, they hadn’t been anything beyond familial or friendly gestures.

Adrienne had smiled at him from the start. She had even said she liked him as more than a friend from the very start, and he had run from that for years because of one harrowing event from when he was fifteen. Zach kept his hands to himself out of fear, and he avoided all things beyond friendship with girls. His father had been right, after all, all those years. If people knew what he was, they’d hate him — they’d hurt him. Most of all, they wouldn’t care about their actions.

This was different, though. Adrienne wasn’t afraid of him, and she knew he wasn’t normal. Yet she wasn’t normal either, and so it didn’t matter that Zach had these abilities, that he was an alchemist. She was a werewolf, and fuck all, he didn’t care either about that. Maybe his differences weren’t anything like her differences, but the stigma of being different was there for both of them. A secret that had to be kept hidden. But not with each other.

Tears falling harder from her eyes hadn’t gone unnoticed by him. He wasn’t sure at first what had caused it, but then he remembered he had yelled at her. A single word, nothing cruel, but he had yelled. “I’m sorry I yelled,” he managed quietly, resting his head against hers, after her own apology. “I shouldn’t have yelled. I’m not mad — just too many thoughts in my head . . . ” He had just wanted them to stop.

Hands wanted to hold her tighter and just rest there, but Adrienne pulled back to look at him. Her eyes were red from crying, and he reached out to touch her face tentatively at the same time that she did with him. Zach might’ve laughed if he were in chipper spirits, but he inhaled sharply instead. Can you forgive me? she asked.

Both of his hands touched her face, trying to brush away tracks of tears with his thumbs. Was he the reason she looked this way? Why she had been hidden, missing? Biting his lip, he held back the tremble he felt wanting to build up again. He hadn’t meant to. He hadn’t meant to . . .

“I’m sorry,” Zach said again, feeling really vulnerable at this time with her. His wall wasn’t there anymore, just this honesty again. “I was going to ask you Saturday,” he continued, rambling once more, “to meet me. I wanted . . . I wanted to ask you if you . . . wanted to be a couple — be my girlfriend. You know, official. Because we hadn’t said it, but I’ve been thinking it . . . ” And then you told me about what happened with Rafe. But Zach didn’t say that part out loud. It was hard enough to say all of this right now when he was looking straight at Adrienne. The words wanted to freeze up in his throat. He wasn’t good at this talking about feelings thing.

“ . . . Is it too late?” he asked, for some reason his heart still pounding fiercely in his chest over what her response would be.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 01:23 pm UTC (link)
Zach's presence calmed Adrienne's tumultuous feelings, his touch was able to calm the destructive flames that ate at her soul. How could she not want Zach? How could anyone else ever compare to him? They couldn't, and even if they tried they would only fail. Zach was the epitome of everything that Adrienne ever wanted in a man. It was a prospect that scared her and excited her all at the same time. From the moment she saw him, a part of her knew that he was the one for her, but it was blocked by the logical part of her mind and by the fear that fueled the paranoia she often had concerning relationships. But as they grew closer, the paranoia fled leaving that feeling of "he's the one" free to grow and develop in Adrienne's heart.

His apology did not fall upon deaf ears. She heard it as she laid her head against his shoulder, her tears staining the shirt that he was wearing. She couldn't respond to him just yet... no. Any words that left her at that moment would be incoherent and so she remained silent. The only thing she could do in response was to grip onto his shirt just a little more tightly than before. She wasn't mad at him... how could she ever be angry with him? He meant everything to her. She needed to know that he forgave her, and so she asked.

Adrienne didn't know what Zach was thinking when he cradled her face. His thumbs ran gently over her cheeks to wipe away the tears that had fallen there. She sniffled and noticed him biting his lower lip. Her brow furrowed in worry and she dragged her fingers slowly over his warm skin, a silent question asking if he was okay. And then he spoke, his words slow and deliberate, words that made Adrienne's heart almost stop in her chest because of the unexpectedness of it all. Zach wanted to be with her, wanted Adrienne to be his girlfriend.

"...Is it to late?" His voice was barely above a whisper and Adrienne could hear his heart beating fiercely in his chest. It was the same type of sound that spoke of fear and anxiety. Why was Zach afraid? Adrienne smiled softly as her fingers made way for her palm to cup his cheek gently. Her head shook from side to side as she answered.

"No... it's not too late. I was afraid that..." she bit her lower lip and averted her eyes for a moment. She swallowed the lump in her throat and then looked up at him. "That you didn't want that with me. To be a couple..." Adrienne had thought a lot about being official with him, but she had told herself that she was going to wait for Zach to say the words, and now that he was she felt herself becoming overwhelmed with emotion. "I really want... want to be your girlfriend, Zach. More than anything."

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 01:29 pm UTC (link)
With a creased brow, he watched as Adrienne looked away and bit her bottom lip. Their eyes met again, though, and the unfinished answer came out at last. Confusion marked his features at Adrienne’s words. Not much sense could be made out of them from what Zach previously understood of their relationship. Why would she think he didn’t want that with her? He did everything with her, and it also seemed like he cut off plans with others just to spend more time with her.

No, he didn’t have the assurance and courage so far to ask her if she had wanted that with him. Perhaps in his own ways he thought the same of Adrienne. Zach doubted at times that she wanted anything real or serious out of whatever they had together. Maybe it was just a casual thing for her. Exclusive, he had believed until Rafe came into the picture and ruined Zach’s perception, but not anything from which they could build something like he saw with his parents.

He felt like a fish out of water, not knowing how these things were even supposed to go. Was he supposed to say something? Take steps and plan it out with Adrienne? How did relationships even work? How often did you date? Did you get presents on certain dates? When was it okay to take it a step further with the physical? His organizing mind wanted to put everything into a neat little schedule, and yet relationships didn’t work like that from what he’d seen from others. So, what was he supposed to do if there wasn’t a guidebook?

“ . . . Not even after what happened Friday night?” he asked quietly, thinking that had been a clear sign if anything that he wanted to be with her. However, Zach thought in terms of himself. He forgot about all of the guys that wanted everything but the relationship. There was so much Zach hadn’t told her about himself. So much that Adrienne didn’t know about how he was the way he was today, and what was he? Adrienne didn’t know. He hadn’t told her.

The hesitations. The holding back. How he ran away from everything. How could she understand if he didn’t tell her?

Glancing down almost shyly, he stared at a point on her shoulder before his eyes lifted back to hers. This was tougher than he thought it would be a few minutes ago. The words were in his head, but it was so hard to say them. Even now, when Adrienne had admitted her own feelings. Only ten days, but Zach had missed being around her so much. He leaned forward to place a chaste kiss to her lips and rested his forehead against hers. Finally, the words came out.

“I want us to be together,” he said in a soft voice, one of his hands taking hers and his thumb running along her fingers.

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[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 01:31 pm UTC (link)
She shook her head slowly at Zach's question. "Friday night was wonderful," she said with a smile. Her tongue ran across her lips to wet them before she continued to speak. "Just after Saturday. I thought that you'd never want to have anything to do with me... " She blushed, embarrassed by her own insecurities and fears. It wasn't like she was an expert at relationships or dating. Sure, she had experience but what did one serious relationship count for when it ended in disaster? And all of her dates? Most of them were just reasons to go out and have fun with no hopes of a relationship at all. So the questions that Zach had were some of the very same that riddled Adrienne's mind.

If only there was a guidebook things would be so much easier! "Turn to page 59 if you've had your first fight"; "Insecurities got you down? Turn to page 126 for quick fixes!"; "Demystifying the first date. More on page 82." You wouldn't have to think for yourself with a guidebook or worry about doing something wrong, it would lead you through all of the twists and turns of a relationship so you could come out triumphant in the end. But life didn't work like that. It wasn't simple or organized, even though we wanted it to be.

The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.

Her eyes glanced up to meet his again, just as he brought them back from staring at her shoulder. There was so much about him she didn't know as there were things about herself that Zach had yet to learn. Adrienne wanted to share those details of her life and personality with him - she wanted to learn about him as he learned about her. She wanted to travel down whatever path she was on with him by her side.

"I want us to be together," he whispered to her after placing a kiss upon her lips. Tears rolled down her cheeks out of happiness and she rested her free hand against his neck. She smiled at him and let her thumb run along part of his jawline. "That's all I want, too. That's all I've ever wanted..." She pulled herself close to him and kissed him softly, letting her lips linger there against his. Adrienne missed the feel of his lips against hers and she didn't pull back until several moments had passed.

"I missed you..." she added quietly with a shy smile. She kept her forehead pressed against his and closed her eyes, letting the moment sink into her soul.

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[info]coalintodiamond
2008-05-01 01:39 pm UTC (link)
Her kiss to him was the final knit in the patchwork, and he returned it with a slight part in his lips. His hand came up to hold the side of her face, the touch solidifying her presence. This was all he wanted — to be with her. It was simple without any hidden strings or ties to it. Adrienne was the bottom line and the only line, and that was all that mattered. He knew how strong she was and yet still he wanted to protect her, though. He wanted to keep Rafe away from her.

Now that he had heard her side of the story, it wasn’t about jealousy anymore. There was still a part of him inside that reeled against the idea of someone drinking her blood of all things and, yes, he was angry and upset for that. Adrienne had felt attacked in a way, though, and Rafe had brought forth the wolf inside of her. Rafe had taken from her and had hurt her, and that’s where the chip would fall with him. Didn’t matter if she asked. Didn’t matter if she’d already forgiven Rafe.

The only thing Zach cared about was making sure she was safe. If that meant confronting the vampire, Zach would do it in a heartbeat.

“I’ve missed you, too,” he whispered back to her. He did, too. So much. Zach wanted nothing more than to gather her in his arms and hold her, and so he did. He just wanted to hold her, and he just wanted to make things right again. That wasn’t too much to ask for, was it? It wasn’t too little? He didn’t care what a single damn person in this place thought of him as long as Adrienne was with him — as long as she wanted and enjoyed being with him. It didn’t matter what they thought or said. Zach could care less.

Only Adrienne’s opinion mattered to him, and he had found it mattered so much. More than he expected or thought so himself. Zach couldn’t say how it happened or where it began or if it even had a beginning. It could have been as simple as the two of them were just right for each other. They fit together, connecting pieces that combined as if they were made for that. Hell, he thought with a smile, they were even the same height. They looked right together. They felt right together. They were right together.

It was all Zach needed to know.

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Fin.
[info]cursedwithfur
2008-05-01 01:41 pm UTC (link)
Zach's words washed over Adrienne like a blanket of relief. She felt as if she could finally collapse under the weight of the stress that had been building upon her because she knew that Zach would be there for her. He'd support her and more importantly, he'd protect her if she couldn't handle it all. While Adrienne was a strong and independent woman, she needed to know that she could be vulnerable with someone; and the person that Adrienne wanted that with was Zach and no one else.

Adrienne could give herself to him fully and never worry about him hurting her or judging her. She was safe with Zach, and as that realization hit her, her knees buckled beneath her and she sank to the ground slowly. She pulled him with her, not wanting to let him go as her body let gravity do its work. When they reached the ground Adrienne smiled at Zach and leaned in for another kiss. God she missed him and she never wanted to be apart from him like that again. Her hand cupped his cheek as she kissed him before she pulled back.

"Can we stay here for a little bit?" She asked quietly as she lowered her body to lie on her side. The grass was cool beneath her as she lay down. Zach followed her, his arm resting across her shoulder as he pulled himself closer to her. He was warm against her body... comforting... her haven. Adrienne nuzzled herself against him, her head resting beneath his chin. It had been a couple of days since she had a good rest, and now that she was finally relaxing all she wanted to do was sleep. Her eyes fluttered close as she breathed in Zach's scent. The sound of his heart beat in her ears, drowning out anything else around her. Adrienne felt safe with Zach there, but most of all she felt as if she had finally returned home.

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