InsaneJournal

"Waiting", Tales of the Abyss
Title: Waiting
Author: Cephy
Fandom: Tales of the Abyss
Characters: Guy, Van
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Character backstory spoilers
Prompt/challenge: Guy and Van - "Things will get better. I promise."

He heard the footsteps behind him but couldn't seem to bring himself to stand, which was stupid, really, because it could have been one of the maids come to try and "cure" him– their new favourite game. Or Pere with his well-meaning but really sometimes annoying concern, or even the Duke, and wouldn't that just be the perfect thing to happen while he was sitting outside Luke's room with a knife in his hand--

Only none of them had that particular tread, did they, quiet and deliberate and stopping one measured step behind and to the left. "Gailardia."

"Don't call me that," he muttered automatically. He took a deep breath, let it out, turned. "I didn't know you were going to be here today."

"It wasn't planned." Sweeping his uniform out of the way, Van came around the bench and-- and knelt in front of him, making Guy look around automatically for anyone who could have seen, though he knew Van wouldn't have done it if there were. Certainly wouldn't have reached out and touched the knife still clutched loosely against Guy's thigh. "Did something happen?"

Guy shook his head wearily. "No. Almost-- I thought, maybe--" I saw him looking at the sword today, he didn't say. And for just that moment, just then, it was enough. Only then I came here, and it just-- stopped.

"It's been almost five years now," is what came out in the face of Van’s continued silence, "and I just keep telling myself I'm waiting for the right time, waiting-- but how long is it going to be before the right time comes? How long can--"

Can I keep making myself believe that it's coming at all?

"Gailardia--"

"Don't call me that," he snapped, then grimaced. "I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I don't-- I don't know what I want--"

Long, calloused fingers touched his face, cupped his cheeks, made him lift his eyes and meet Van's calm, determined gaze. "It's only natural to feel doubt-- anyone would. I'm proud of how you've held on to yourself so far." He smiled, and Guy was embarrassed to feel his cheeks warming. "We are close," Van went on, "so very close, just remember your purpose. Remember why you are here. And-- remember yourself, son of Gardios."

It was hard to meet the intensity of Van's stare, bright and sharp and sure, but he did. He took a deep breath, let it out. Closed his eyes, opened them again, and nodded.