Logan's movement had Rogue adjusting under the covers to keep the sheet between them where it needed to be and her hair doing a good portion of covering the most dangerous areas. If she was going to lay there she was going to stay there for awhile. He wanted to tear down her walls and if anyone could do it, it would be Logan. Yet despite the tenderness she felt for him, for him to want to be that much closer to her, Rogue could already feel the mental defenses rising. It's for his own good. You'll only hurt him if you let him in. Then you'll lose him just like you've lost everyone else. She snuggled closer to him, managing a returning smile to his wink. He wanted into her mind and she wanted out of it. Oh, the irony.
"I wasn't tryin' to replace you," she assured. "I just knew you'd always be outta my reach. Bobby was the first person my age who ever paid me any real attention, made it a point to get to now me. John liked to flirt with me, Kitty and Jubes were always cordial enough to me, but Bobby was the one who made me feel like I might actually belong there. Everyone else...just kinda felt like they were just shy of bein' afraid of me. Course then the whole thing with me drainin' you happened and people never looked at me right again." She wasn't hurt by it anymore. Getting older gave her perspective, and she knew if she'd been one of the other kids there would have been fear in her. It wasn't their fault, it was just human nature. You fear what you don't understand. Everyone heard it all the time in the mutant community. It was just rare for a mutant to realize it happened even among their own kind.
She thought back to the night they'd met. She was on the run, going everywhere and nowhere. How she ended up in that bar was anyone's guess, especially since it was so far from home. When she left her parents she had given no real thought as to where she wanted to end up. She just knew she had to get away so as not to hurt them. If she believed in God, maybe Rogue could have believed she'd been led there by divine providence. All she knew was there was something about Logan that made her feel connected. Even before she knew what or who he was. She'd tried to protect him from the first when that man came out with a shotgun. She knew she hadn't saved his life or anything, but that was the moment something began. "I think it's because we're so much alike. I couldn't help but fall for you when you gave me a ride, but it was more to it than that. You represented strength and independence. And fearlessness. I wanted to be those things."
So they were alone then, huh? As much as she wanted to stay right where she was, fall asleep there, there was something she needed to share with Logan. "Okay, will you humor me for a sec?" She got up without his answer, knowing he would. Leaving the bedroom, she crossed the hall into the spare room that still housed unpacked boxes, a desk, and full keyboard. It wasn't her baby grand sitting in wait back home or the beautiful black grand at the mansion, but it would do. She pulled a chair up and sat down before it. "Couple years ago I started writin' songs. It helped me get stuff out when I needed to, especially since I had no one to talk to. Course then music started effectin' me differently. Every song I wrote, every one I heard on the radio reminded me of someone or some memory linked to another person from my past."
She licked her lips and looked down at the black and white keys. "There's a song that came out a couple months back. I don't know how you feel about country music..." She gave a little nervous laugh. "But every time I heard it I thought of you. An' I wasn't even gonna tell you this because it's...I don't know. I just wasn't. But I feel like you need to hear it now." She didn't sing in front of anyone. Playing was one thing, singing was another. When Bobby walked in on her at the mansion, the only reason she hadn't died of embarrassment was because she'd had a fair amount of wine in her. Still, this was something she felt like she had to do. Right now. So Rogue lifted her hands and began to play, singing him I Won't Let Go by Rascal Flatts.