Cissie Jones Merlyn (herownway) wrote in newalliance, @ 2014-07-31 17:18:00 |
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Current music: | Skyscraper - John Barrowman |
Entry tags: | arrowette, green arrow i |
Who: Cissie and Ollie
What: Yoga, catching up, checking in, planting doubt and name changes
When: July 30, 2014
Where: Casa de Arrow, Brooklyn, NY
Status: Incomplete
Rating: Low to medium.
Warning: Starter is REALLLLY Long.
The music echoed off the walls of the basement training area, emanating from a smartphone sitting on the floor next to the yoga mat Cissie currently occupied. Inhaling and slowly breathing out through her mouth, she pushed herself up into the sunbird position, raising her upper body from the mat, lifting a leg and one of her arms, reminding herself what Connor had taught her. The yoga was a new addition to her regimen, one that she had been iffy about at first, but now that she was doing it she had to admit that it really was as everyone said.
As recent an addition as it was, she found that it helped calm her down, helped clear her head. And given how stressed and cluttered her head had been the last three months (longer if she was honest with herself), she found it a welcome change and a little bit miraculous. She still had a few weeks till classes started, the last vestiges of summer were already starting to be felt, in spite of the 80-degree heat. But it was Wednesday, training day. She'd taken the train into Brooklyn, choosing a time when she knew that Ollie, Roy and Connor would all be out and the brownstone would be quiet. She started with this and then would move on to shooting, her bow was sitting in its' case against the wall.
Cissie breathed again and pushed herself up into a plank position. The music playing softly - easy listening music with lyrics. It really was in these moments that she could relax. The stress seemed to fall away. The hectic life that came with heroing fell to the back burner and she was just in the moment. It was moments like these that she could reflect; the song playing bringing up some thoughts that she hadn't quite been able to truly process yet.
She felt was calm. Relaxed in a way she couldn't really remember having been before. It was almost like things were just falling into place. After the longest time where she felt like she was being pulled in too many directions, where she wasn't in control of where she was going, in this moment all that was different. She felt... Settled was a good word for it. Happy was a better one.
Happy. Was actually accurate. She was graduated, she had a family that cared about her, friends. Hell she'd been calling Malcolm dad in her head for months and had finally found that balance in her own conscience where she wasn't betraying her father by accepting Malcolm for what he was. All that shit that she'd been through up to this point, all of it mattered, but it wasn't who she was. Not anymore. And knowing that was extremely freeing. Admittedly the music was probably what was spurring this realization, but this was a new beginning. At the age of 18 she could be herself. In all aspects.
'But you're not yet,' she said to herself. It wasn't self doubt speaking. Doing it meant making some changes. Things she needed to do. Cutting the strings, choosing who to be, in and out of costume. Choosing who she wanted to be in the most literal sense. This thought made her smile as she flattened her body on the mat before pushing her upper body up with her arms, her back arching into cobra. She'd need a bit of help and maybe a bit of paperwork, but if she was doing this then she might as well grab all of it.
Content... She really had missed feeling like this. Maybe it was the music spurring her on but sometimes the right song and the right mindset caused epiphanies. She was focused on what she was doing and didn't hear the footsteps upstairs making note that someone had either come home or down from the second level.