Mary Magdalene (gospel_of_mary) wrote in nevermore_logs, @ 2012-10-05 08:33:00 |
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Entry tags: | judas iscariot, mary magdalene |
WHO: Mary Magdalene & Judas Iscariot
WHEN: Tuesday night
WHERE: Some dive bar in Manhattan
WHAT: The wife and the betrayer. Yeah, this'll go real well.
WARNINGS: Violence, language, creepy sexuality.
Living with Huitzilopochtli felt strangely natural. Mary had kept her own apartment because sometimes she did need the time alone, but most nights she was with her Hummingbird. It should have been messed up because they were, in some ways, messed up, but it felt... good. Mary had spent her eternal life drowning in self-imposed loneliness without love but Huitzilopochtli had somehow given her exactly what she needed. She sometimes wondered how much of it was just because he'd been so hard to get.
But the nature of immortals never really changed and so Mary kept her difficult moods and her argumentative nature and (although she'd prefer it gone) her desire for the attentions of men. Some nights she went out to bars and flirted with the men there, reveling in their attention, but so far she'd forced herself to remain faithful. There had been a few close calls but so far even she was impressed by how much she was managing not to be a big whore.
The bar tonight was a little rundown but enough eyes turned to her when she came in (in her leather pants, in her low-cut top) that Mary knew she'd stay. She made her way to the bar and ordered two shots of tequila to start the night.
Judas was well on his way to getting trolleyed. He was two drinks in already, but he'd misjudged slightly and had to break the seal early. As he stood at the urinal, he stared apathetically at the cracks in the tiles. Meeting Delilah had been refreshing, and he kept going back to it. Immortals weren't all completely bad then, he surmised, also wondering idly if Shaz was as good as the scrawled message on the wall insisted she was.
He zipped up and washed his hands. His face looked back at him, grey and listless. He'd never liked the look of himself, and even less when he was drinking. Nothing seemed to matter. He wandered back out to head to the bar, hands in pockets.
"One more thanks Joe," he said to the barman, and sat down on the bar stool. It took a second for him to follow his instinct and glance down the bar towards the hot piece of ass sitting by the door. Ice stabbed his gut, the first proper intense feeling he'd had in years. "Mary."
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 01:00 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Mary had the empty shot glass to her lips when she felt that tingle and heard someone say her name. For a moment she didn't recognize the voice, but even as she turned to look she knew who it was.
"You," said Mary, her voice low and dark.
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 01:08 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"Shit!" Judas wasn't ashamed to say that the thrill of terror that went through him was part of what made him move so fast. As soon as they made eye contact, he went pale and almost fell off the stool in his haste, his new drink accidentally spilling over the lap of the man next him when he knocked it over. Mary had promised dire things if they ever met again, and Judas did not want to see if she was being serious. Since she was between him and the front door, he headed towards the fire escape at the back, bumping between pool tables and confused men who'd never seen the skinny, whey-faced guy move so fast.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 01:12 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Mary wasn't letting him get away again that easily. They'd run into each other in the sixties and she'd slapped him then, promising that if she ever saw him again she'd kill him. It had been something of an empty threat then, all anger and pain and nothing more. But these days it wasn't so empty.
So forgetting her second shot, Mary took off after him, shoving past the men at the pool tables and bursting through the door to the alley. "I told you," she told him, feeling the rage bubbling inside of her. "I told you that if I saw you again- you have no right to be in this city!" Judas had no right to be alive, to be here as a part of her life when she wasn't allowed to see Jesus again.
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 01:18 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"I didn't know you'd be here!" Judas replied, skidding to a halt when faced with the dead end of the alley, and turning around to face Mary, trying to keep a healthy distance between them. "How many times do I have to apologise to you? You know I regret it every second of every day!" He held his hands up in a defensive gesture, open palms out to try and subdue her. She'd got angrier, that was for sure.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 01:22 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"You regret it?" Mary demanded, stalking forward, shoving his shoulder roughly. "You regret it? Oh, well that's fine!" Again she shoved him. "I regret that I ever met you, that I ever thought you were the sort of person who-"
But words were hard and stupid and so instead she drew back her fist and punched him, the crack of her knuckles barely registering through the adrenalin.
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 01:26 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Judas reeled back, seeing stars for a few seconds. When had she learned to hit like that!? He shook his head, dabbing at his nose to see if she'd made him bleed. "I'm punished for it every moment that I continue to exist," he moaned, face throbbing. "It wasn't my fault, not entirely. He wanted it to happen!" He was a little afraid of Mary, but he could feel his heart beating in his chest and waking him up. Even the pain was welcomed.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 01:29 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
She'd hit him, but Judas' own words - He wanted it to happen were harder than any physical blow he could have delivered. She visibly flinched against them because, on some level, she knew that it was true. Jesus had left her, his role bigger and more important than anyone, even his own wife.
"Shut up," Mary snapped. "You don't even deserve to think about him."
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 01:36 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"How can help thinking of Him? He who betrayed me even more than I betrayed him?" Judas snarled, bitterness writ clear on his face. "I loved him too, Mary. I was there too. I wasn't Peter or Mark or Matthew, but I was there too, and I deserve more respect than this." He spat on the ground, anger overtaking repentence for a moment.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 01:38 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"You didn't love him!" Mary couldn't even let that idea stand because how could anyone who loved Jesus (as she had loved Jesus, so painfully and desperately and completely) have betrayed him as Judas had.
"You sold him, you betrayed all of us." Her voice was a low hiss now, but still as furious as before.
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 01:45 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"I did love him! I loved him more than all of you, which is why I was the only one of us who could do what had to be done- I sacrificed myself, I died on that cross with him, you don't have any idea of what I've gone through-" Judas see-sawed between hate and love for Jesus, and though he'd much rather run away from Mary, the words were just falling out of his mouth, in hope that something would stick with her. Every story he'd told himself, every justification could and would be used until she felt sympathy.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 01:48 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"You disgust me," Mary said, shoving him again, this time into the brick wall behind them, her hands wrapping around his throat. "Your every filthy lie." She wanted to choke the life out of him, wanted to see him hang again for that crime, over and over.
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 01:55 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Judas could have tried to fight her off, but he didn't. Instead he gripped her wrists, face contorted as his windpipe was crushed. The wall hurt, his throat hurt, she was staring at him with such intense hatred, and he'd never felt more alive. Blood pounded in his ears and through his body as his heart tried to compensate for the lack of air. He met her eyes, his own bloodshot, hers bright with emotion, and remembered that he'd once cared for her a great deal.
"We were friends once," he managed to croak out, his head going giddy and faint.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 01:59 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Mary had thought so clearly that if she saw Judas again she would murder him. She didn't care that it would be a sin - Mary sinned every single day - and she didn't care what anyone would think of her. But now here he was and Mary found that she couldn't do it. She couldn't kill him. Between the two of them was some undercurrent she hadn't counted on.
Her fingers loosened, just a little, and she shook her head. "Not any more." She swallowed the hard lump in her throat but didn't remove her hands. "You destroyed what we had."
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 02:06 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"I know," Judas replied, gasping in a little bit of air through the loosening of her fingers, which kept him from passing out. "I hate myself for it every God-forsaken moment of my life." He didn't want Mary to stop punishing him, because punishing himself was a tricky operation that involved ropes and ceiling fans and on a couple of instances a gag. "We were all pawns for the greater good."
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 02:10 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Mary glared at him and then, with a hiss of irritation she tore her hands away from his throat, squeezing her eyes tightly shut. "I hate you," she told him, promising herself that if she dared cry she'd punish herself for the weakness later. But Mary was always remembered as the tender woman who wept at the foot of the cross, her own name coming into English as melancholy. She could hardly help her displays of emotion.
But when she opened her eyes and looked at him the anger was still there. "I've dreamed of murdering you, over and over and over, in so many different ways. I want nothing more than to hang you from another fucking tree."
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 02:18 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Judas sagged against the wall, watching Mary through hooded eyes. She was as regretful as he, with the added advantage of someone to blame for it. He rubbed his throat. "I want the same thing, but I can't. Die. I've tried." Well, sort of, by accident, a couple of times, but he'd come right back. He suddenly lunged to take Mary by the wrists, holding them up between them and tugging her closer. "I want you to do it," he hissed, teeth gritted.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 02:21 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
He smelled like sweat and stale booze at this distance and Mary wrinkled her nose in distaste. They'd been so close once. She'd adored Judas like a brother, but that love was long dead now. And yet what he wante, Mary didn't think she could give.
"You want death and release?" Mary asked, her voice pitched low, her face close to his. "No. Why should you get that when all the rest of us have to remain?"
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 02:27 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"I won't get it. Ever." Judas's voice was soft. Mary seemed stained by the world she walked through, but the goodness Jesus had seen in her still shone through from beneath. Perhaps that was what still drew people to her. Without warning, Judas lunged forward and kissed her, hands loosening on her wrists. He kissed her like he'd kissed Jesus, only this time there were no soldiers waiting to take anyone away.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 02:31 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Judas' lips met hers and Mary felt herself suddenly gag in horror and surprise. Her hand (now free of his) shot to Judas' throat again and she slammed him against the bricks hard. Her body tingled but the disgust there mingled with something that shouldn't have been there and that had never been there before: lust.
It was only seconds after pushing him away that Mary shoved herself against Judas to kiss him hungrily, the fingers of one hand still wrapped around his throat.
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[info]faithtraitor
2011-10-04 02:46 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Judas felt the wind knocked out of him, but a moment later Mary was back, kissing him hard. He wasn't sure exactly how far she was going to let him go, but he knew next time they met he wouldn't be running away. Her fingers weren't as savage as before, but she held him firmly and anything he could get from an actual woman at this point was a bonus, let alone from Mary Magdalene. He kissed her back as forcefully as she'd let him, one hand holding the hand at his throat, the other flat on the wall behind him.
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[info]gospel_of_mary
2011-10-04 02:48 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Against his body, Mary shuddered. What was she doing? This was wrong and disgusting and this wasn't her at all. She was a slut, she knew that, but she didn't fuck people she hated, and there was no one she hated more than this man she was currently trying to unbuckle the pants on. All she could think right then was that she wanted this. It didn't matter how sick or messed up it might have been, she needed this.