Roxanna Fielding (bang_a_drum) wrote in nevermore_logs, @ 2014-09-03 19:55:00 |
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Current mood: | hungry |
Current music: | Of Monsters And Men - Little Talks |
Who: Roxanna & Jamie (Could be open to Thomas or Lena, but can also stand alone)
What: Just chillin'
When: Sunday afternoon
Where: Kemp house
Warnings: Wee bit of underage drinking
Roxanna knew she really ought to be packing, but she couldn't bring herself to. That meant she was really leaving, that made it real. So she'd pulled up her syllabi online, her earbuds firmly lodged into her ears, as though to block out the world. From her position on her bed, she could see several partially-packed boxes with clothes and possessions draped in and around them, but every time her gaze landed on one, she'd look away quickly. They just made her feel sad.
The combination of deliberate avoidance, and the music in her ears, combined to help her efficiently tune out the world around her, so she was definitely startled when one of her earbuds was tugged out. She jerked, dislodging the headphone jack from the laptop. Of Monsters and Men filled the air, and she scrambled to pause the song. Jamie was standing there, an amused look on his face. "I've been trying to get your attention for the past few minutes," he told her. "Gone deep in your head?"
Roxanna made a noncommital noise in the back of her throat, then sighed. "I'm putting off packing. Don't give me that look, I'm aware I start on Tuesday. I'm trying to forget that part."
"You're making it sound like you'll never get to come back, when in fact, Lena would probably go and find you on campus if you didn't come back," Jamie pointed out (fairly reasonably, he thought).
"Shut up," Roxanna sighed, throwing a sock at him. "I'm aware of that. The couch in the living room is practically my second bed. But that doesn't mean I want to go back to living in a room slightly smaller than your average apartment, surrounded by people who can't adhere to the quiet hours, and who think running up and down the halls at all hours is just so much fun."
Jamie sat down on the end of her bed. "You know there's always a place here for you, right?" he asked. "Whenever you need to get away, or focus, or something. It's not like we're going to kick you out into the cold. You can always come back."
For a child who'd bounced around the foster system since she was small, that was the thing Roxanna had wanted the most. It was also the sentiment she trusted the least. 6 homes in 6 years, it was a terrible track record, and by the time she'd turned 12, no one could really blame her for still thinking she was always halfway out the door.
And, Jamie was willing to concede, no one could blame her for thinking that the good situation she'd found herself in would suddenly vanish. It was probably going to take her a while to feel totally comfortable, all the way down to her bones, no matter how much she presented a content, happy front. And he knew how that felt, he knew how it felt to be left behind by someone who was supposd to take care of you. He also knew how hard it was to try and move on from that. He'd spent ages 6-14 being angry and hurt by Serenity's leaving, and it was only because he'd truly made peace with his past that he could try and help Roxanna like he was.
"Yeah, I know," she sighed. "And I mean, I know it's stupid, but it feels like leaving home all over again. It was bad enough when I left for college."
"One, how you are feeling is never stupid," Jamie said. "Two, I don't anyone would ever blame you for how you're feeling. Three, you'll have to come back, because who else is going to finish your cake vodka with me?" He poked one of the boxes with his toe, producing a clinking sound of glass.
"You're so weird," Roxanna laughed. "Actually, give me that, it sounds really good right now." Jamie handed her the bottle, and she took a slug from it, before passing it to him. Jamie took his own drink and replaced the bottle in its box. "You know," he said. "When I was little and feeling down, Dad would turn on the radio, and we'd just dance around the apartment. It makes you feel better, even if it's just for a little while."
Roxanna couldn't hold back the slight smile. "And hey, we can practice for your dad's wedding," she said. "Yeah, OK." She turned 'Little Talks' back on, and Jamie gave her a hand up off the bed, before spinning her around and then across the room. It made her laugh as she spun, her dark hair flying out around her head.
The pair of them quickly found a rhythm, falling into step and moving around the room. There was no real flow to it, but it made the both of them laugh, and the gloomy mood was quickly leaving the room. Later on, they'd head to the kitchen and forage for dinner. Later, Jamie would come back and help her pack the rest of her boxes. But for right now, there was nothing else to think about but the lightness they felt right now.