Thomas Julian Kemp (asterismos) wrote in nevermore_logs, @ 2013-03-14 18:16:00 |
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Entry tags: | jameson kemp, thomas kemp |
WHO: Thomas and Jamie Kemp
WHAT: And some more results...
WHEN: Thursday afternoon
WHERE: Mostly their home
NOTES: Sorry for spamming, we are excited/upset
When Jamie had been declared negative for Huntington's, the testing centre had passed that news on by phone. Thomas had known their results were likely to be released at different times, and he hadn't really been worried that he hadn't been told his tests came out negative at the same time as Jamie was. Apprehension grew though when he received a call that he should stop by the testing centre because there was something they wanted to discuss with him.
The call had come just after eleven and, unable to concentrate on anything else, he had explained the situation to the principal and been told to take a few days off. He didn't even stop to eat lunch, he just headed straight there. Then all he had to do was sit in a waiting room, wringing his hands for an hour and a half while butterflies warred in his belly.
Even while he sat on the plastic chair and stared hard at his hands, he hoped he had been called in to discuss something other than a positive result on his test. It was possible, wasn't it? He had to believe it was. Maybe there was a problem and it was inconclusive? Perhaps he would have to try again, which would be okay. Or...it could be something else. It could be that the tests revealed Jamie wasn't biologically his.
A year after Jamie was born and his mother had left, Thomas' mother had suggested he get a DNA test done to prove paternity. She only suggested it for medical reasons (which didn't seem so silly now), but Thomas had refused. He was 99.9% sure Jamie's mother hadn't been with anyone else anyway, but on the off-chance she had been, Thomas didn't want to know. His name was on the birth certificate and he was legally and emotionally Jamie's father and that was enough. But what if this test had revealed that Jamie wasn't his? He was fairly sure if that was the case he still wouldn't want to know. Jamie was his in all the important ways!
They finally called his name and Thomas made his way into a small offce, feeling like he was heading to face a firing squad. He sat uneasily, facing the geneticist who was offering a benign smile he recognised well. It was bad news. Oh god it was bad news. The moment she started talking, he missed most of what she said as he sat in shock. He did, however, understand the gist of what she was saying.
The test was positive and he would develop Huntington's. He would have to undergo more testing to see if the symptoms had started yet. He was going to have to sign contracts to continue to attend post-results counselling which included attending groups for people with terminal illnesses. That was when it really hit him.
Terminal Illnesses.
The rest of what she said went by in a blur and he signed his name to a few contracts before leaving the centre in a daze. He arrived home well before Jamie, which meant he was alone with his thoughts. The door closed behind him and Thomas felt the sound echo through him.
He had Huntington's. He was unlikely to live past the age of 60 even if he was lucky, unless he developed the disease later in life like his father had, but that was rare; and he was already more than half-way to 60. This couldn't be real.
It was hitting him now. He was home and he had to face telling his son and he didn't know how or where to begin. He didn't even know where to begin dealing with it himself. He pushed his bedroom door open with a creak and he was suddenly overwhelmed by a wave of nausea. He rushed to his ensuite bathroom to vomit the pithy contents of his stomach. He rose and washed his mouth out and brushed his teeth before raising his eyes to take a good look at himself.
He looked fine. He looked healthy. It was all lies.
Even after voiding his stomach, he still felt sick. Leaving the bathroom, all he could do was sink to the floor and crawl towards his bed. Once there, he curled up with his back against his mattress. Pulling his legs towards him he wrapped his arms around them while he leaned his forehead to rest against his knees. Unable to stop himself, Thomas burst into tears. He worried Jamie might find him, but he was too lost in his own grief to halt his tears.
He sat there, crying and horrified, until Jamie came home.