Natalie Godfrey (bornincrossfire) wrote in nevermore_logs, @ 2011-08-07 13:42:00 |
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Entry tags: | natalie godfrey, the red baron |
WHO: Natalie & the Red Baron
WHEN: Saturday afternoon (2011-08-08)
WHERE: Natalie's apartment
WHAT: Happy birthday, my old friend.
Natalie had to admit that she was feeling a little less than overwhelmed with today. On the plus side she had been given free cake that morning when she arrived in from Dallas back to the airport, but on the minus side it was for the big 3-0.
30 didn't feel as old as she thought it was when she'd been twenty, but it still felt older than Natalie would like to be. She'd hoped at thirty she'd be... what exactly? Married with kids and a house in the suburbs? No, that had never been the dream. Maybe what she wanted was to have led a more adventurous life but when she looked back on the last ten years there had been plenty of adventure. She hadn't exactly been hiding away in a closet somewhere, and the last two years especially had been beyond explanation.
Gods and immortals went and made everything seem a little less everyday even though they now were everyday.
She'd been fielding phonecalls (and a few visits) all day, family and friends wishing her well and gods filling up her apartment with presents from their own little segment of belief. (She now owned the entire back catalog of Green Lantern comics and was going to have to find time to actually read them.)
The person she most wished would wish her happy birthday wasn't around though and his absence ached. She and Conrad had spent every one of their birthdays together since they'd met four years ago. But she had began to accept that she had to move on from her mistakes, and that Conrad truly did deserve more than she'd given him. (Her own stupid self-fulfilling prophesy was laughing in her face there.)
So when she answered the door, hair still damp from the shower, she didn't think that it would be Con standing there and the shock must have been clear on her face. After a moment she managed, "hi," and a surprised smile.
He'd had months to heal, and yet he was still dumbfounded that he would come to her door now after she'd nailed his heart to the wall. He'd been so angry, but in seeing her just a month before cleaned up, in much better shape than she had been it instilled some hope within him.
The brutal fact was he still cared for her. Loved her. He was putting his heart out on the line again by just showing up. He even had brought a gift in tow for her birthday.
There was the awkward silence when she'd answered the door. "Good afternoon, Miss Natalie." He'd managed to revert back to his old ways when they'd just been friends, it seemed to hurt a little less than saying her name plainly.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-08 02:52 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"I didn't expect to see you," Natalie admitted and then realised that they were just standing there in the doorway awkwardly. "Oh, come in, sorry." She drew back from the door so he could enter if he wanted.
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-08 03:03 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
If he was going to be honest with her, he hadn't expected to show. He may have been sitting on that gift for weeks, but it still stung to see her face. He'd hoped to put that behind them, at least to some degree as he found he missed her more than hated her these days.
"I didn't expect to come," he said handing her the little box.
He stepped inside at her instruction closing the door behind him.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-08 03:19 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"I'm glad you did," Natalie told him quietly as she took the box, unwrapping it carefully. When she opened the box to look at the pin she stared at it in slight amazement. "Con, this is... so beautiful." She looked up at him. "Thank you."
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-08 03:27 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
He didn't smile as much as he used to, though he had moved on from their situation as best as he was able. The simple fact was he missed her.
"You are quite welcome, dear." There was a sadness in his voice.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-08 03:31 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
They were standing there like idiots and Natalie missed her friend so much. She shouldn't tell him that though. It would seem like she was forcing him into admitting the same.
And yet: "I've missed you." She said it quietly and there was sadness in her voice as well.
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-08 03:39 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
He wanted to reach out and accept what this was now, but he couldn't. Conrad swallowed heavily, his hand taking hold of her own even without his consent. It was instinct and he wanted as much as her to get past this.
Had he forgiven her? Not quite. But, this was a start.
"I've missed you as well."
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-08 03:51 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Natalie gave him a small smile, rubbing her thumb across his as they held each other's hand. "I hope," she said quietly, "that one you'll let me your friend again. I know that I don't deserve it after what I did, but I do care about you and you've always been my best friend."
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-08 04:01 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
She seemed to have grown since their time apart.
He swallowed heavily, that insatiable pound in his chest as he kept his hand within hers. He placed is other hand atop hers giving her a heartfelt look. "I will always be your friend Miss Natalie." That had never changed though it for a time had broken more than just his heart. His trust wasn't quite there yet, but he couldn't deny that he didn't want to care for her again. To be with her again. To love her again.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-08 04:05 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Natalie felt a little tearful suddenly, so glad that he might find a way to forgive her for what she'd done and move past it. She smiled at him and then had to steal back her hand for a moment to wipe the tear under her ear. "God, I might turn into a mess here," she joked, looking up at him. then, more seriously, she said, "thank you, Con."
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-08 04:13 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
He nodded again as if to reassure her that he wasn't going to go back on his word. She had been a part of his life for the last four years, and while that was such a small margin for the ninety he had actually been around, it meant something to him. He couldn't just throw away the unseen connection that had brought them together in the first place.
He held a soft hand to her cheek, rubbing a thumb against it.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-08 04:49 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Again she smiled at him, grateful that he was there as she turned her cheek a little more into his hand. When she straightened up again she asked, "can you stay a while? I can put the kettle on, or would you like a scotch?"
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-10 06:57 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
There was some sort of relief there that she was alright. That he didnt feel like he had to pick up the pieces. She looked well.
He gave her a small smile. "I can, if you wish. Tea would be fine." He didn't feel like a scotch in the middle of the day.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-11 09:30 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"Good," Natalie nodded once, a small smile on her lips. "Good."
She headed through to the kitchen to put the kettle on and then she turned back to look at Con. "How have you been?" she asked.
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-13 04:19 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Conrad had shuffled slowly into her kitchen, refamiliarizing himself with her apartment, which hadn't looked this put together in years. It looked as well as she did.
"I've been keeping myself busy. More time with Moritz, reading and taking notes for my exam ." He still intended to reapply for his license. There were things he'd be questioned and tested on. It wad the part he hated the most. He'd never been big on tests and evaluations.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-14 04:37 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Natalie smiled more brightly at the mention of studying for his exam. "That's brilliant, Connie," Natalie told him warmly. "I'm so glad you're going for it again. The sky without you in it is all wrong."
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-17 05:15 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
He was glad to see this side of her. It was vibrant again, made his old heart tick. Part of him was regretful that it still pounded so hard for her, that even in his anger and hurt he couldn't let her go.
He leaned against the kitchen counter while she made the tea hands braced on either side of him and grasping the edge. "It's good to hear you say that," he said softly. "I've missed it." He couldn't beat himself up anymore.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-17 06:05 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"When are you going for it?" Natalie asked as she put everything onto a tray for them. She wanted to offer to buy him dinner afterwards but that felt a little forward at this point.
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-17 08:05 pm UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
Conrad took a seat on the couch once she was finished. "September I hope. I'm not big on tests, I hardly remember the last one," he said with a big laugh. In truth he had only had to do this a few times, but this was the first time he'd had to for such a careless mistake on his part.
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[info]bornincrossfire
2011-08-22 08:22 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"I know you'll do great," Natalie told him, her voice filled with warmth and adoration. How could she doubt him, after all? The man sitting across from her had been her childhood hero, her very reason for taking to the skies herself.
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[info]the_red_knight
2011-08-25 12:36 am UTC (link) DeleteFreezeScreenTrack This Select
"Let's hope," he said with a slight laugh. "Driving isn't my specialty." His own joke for the mistakes he'd made, it was a step into the right direction or he'd waste another three years beating himself up.