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Tweak says, "And the mome raths outgrabe."

The Porn Santa (smutmas_mod) wrote in merry_smutmas,
@ 2007-12-14 08:00:00

Entry tags:

fic, ron/draco

Merry Smutmas, kangeiko!

To: kangeiko
From: synn

Title: Air Pockets
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Ron/Draco
Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling and Warner Brothers own the Harry Potter characters and universe, I'm just borrowing them.
Summary: PWP -- A regular Tuesday night for Ron and Draco. Almost.
Warnings: Dirty talk and mild breathplay.
Author's notes: Merry Smutmas, Kangeiko! I really, really hope you like it. Many thanks, as always, to my beta, and those others who were patient and endured my angst with the utmost patience.

Air Pockets

(Post a new comment)

	secretsolitaire 2007-12-14 01:46 pm UTC (link)
	Mmm, lovely porn! I like that they're clearly happy with each other, but there's those undercurrents of sadness because they don't feel that they can come out to their families. The scarf was a nice reminder of that even during the smut. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 03:33 am UTC (link)
	Thank you! I'm glad the use of the scarf specifically came through (and I like that particular icon of yours in conjunction with the comment). Glad you enjoyed the story! : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	snegurochka_lee 2007-12-14 03:30 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, fabulous! The pairing was enough to make me click quickly, but the warnings really clinched the deal. Dirty talk and breathplay! Two of my favourite things! Ron's filthy mouth was wonderful, nnnnnng, and I loved the whispers of their dedication to each other even though their relationship is a secret. Lovely. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 03:35 am UTC (link)
	Thank you! Dirty talk and breathplay are two of my own favorites, though this is the first time I've written either -- I'm happy you liked it! : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

entrenous88
2007-12-14 03:34 pm UTC (link)

*flails* Ron is so domineering with his dirty talk and tugging on Draco's scarf. Hotness, but with sadness infusing the story throughout: Draco's pathetic apartment, the scarf that's been created in girlish colors for Ron's new "bird", the surety that neither family will accept this. But their closeness at the end, and the way they respond to one another, gives a little spark of hope as well.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 03:43 am UTC (link)
	Thank you! All I can say it that it was definitely a trip, figuring out how to make Ron talk dirty and top in a way that seemed believable to me... Glad it worked for you! : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	kangeiko 2007-12-14 06:02 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, this is perfect!! "My father would have called having a drink with you slumming it. He'd have no word for this." And it's so true! g Thank you so much for this, it is lovely & unbelievably hot. purrs (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 03:45 am UTC (link)
	Hi! I saw your post to your yuletide author about hoping for happier stories after I'd written it, so I'm sorry it wasn't more upbeat, but really happy you liked it anyway! : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	rickey_a 2007-12-15 01:23 am UTC (link)
	Gorgeous, absolutely goreous and so f'ing hotttt! This is really the heart of an R/D I think. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 03:48 am UTC (link)
	Thanks! and Thank you, too, for reccing it on your fic report card. I get anxious about explicit scenes because I can't ever tell if they're 'hot' to the reader, so I really appreciate hearing when it works. Glad you enjoyed the story : ) (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rickey_a 2008-02-04 05:01 pm UTC (link)
	Hi, just letting you know that I rec'd this on crack_broom today cheers, Rickey http://community.livejournal.com/crack_broom/599662.html (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	synn 2008-02-06 04:30 am UTC (link)
	Wow, that's awesome! Thank you so much! : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	kaalee 2007-12-15 03:50 am UTC (link)
	Oh, I liked this one a lot! I loved the mixed uncertainty balanced with their clear desire that they both have for each other. Nice job! :) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 03:49 am UTC (link)
	Glad you enjoyed it, Thank you! : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	snarry_fan7 2007-12-15 03:57 am UTC (link)
	Lovely work and they work so well together. I love Ron's dirty talking and the atmosphere.~Sophia (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 03:58 am UTC (link)
	Thank you : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	stuckinsea 2007-12-15 05:36 am UTC (link)
	Very nice. I like the fact that these two are still guarded around each other, that they're still so unsure of their feelings, though they can still lose their inhibitions when they're together and of course loved the smut...XD A perfect x-mas gift. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:02 am UTC (link)
	Thank you! I couldn't picture them 100% comfortable with each other, so had to work around that -- I'm glad it worked for you : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	dancetomato 2007-12-15 05:39 am UTC (link)
	Dirty-talking Ron = ded dancetomato. It's all the hotter and more lovely because of the care that is underneath it. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:04 am UTC (link)
	That's practically the only way to go with dirty talk, in my book, precisely b/c it's hotter that way : ) Thank you! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	lesyeuxverts 2007-12-15 07:56 pm UTC (link)
	Mmm, beautiful! This is so well written, and you've just caught the boys perfectly here. Great characterization and lovely smut! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:07 am UTC (link)
	Thank you! I've never read Ron/Draco before, let alone written it, so getting a grip on the characters was probably the hardest part. So it's really nice to hear it worked. Glad you enjoyed it : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	moshesque 2007-12-16 12:27 am UTC (link)
	Delicious - I thoroughly enjoyed this. ________ (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:07 am UTC (link)
	Thank you! : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	celandineb 2007-12-16 05:37 am UTC (link)
	For PWP this has a lot of underlying emotion... very, very nicely done. "I didn't think you'd be here, tonight." "It's Tuesday," Ron answers. "It's Christmas." "Yes." That just sums it all up so well... (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:21 am UTC (link)
	Thank you - it was a definite challenge, getting the emotions of a much longer story I'd wanted to write in to a PWP, and I take my writing very seriously, so it's really nice to know that it worked. Glad you enjoyed it : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

r_grayjoy
2007-12-16 06:56 am UTC (link)

Ooh, really lovely; intriguing blend of comfortable and bleak. Which perhaps this pairing should be. There's no way they'd have an easy time of it, at least not in the beginning.

I like that there's so much unspoken understanding between them: "Draco chuckles, and his smile calls Ron a liar" and "He catches the glitter of mischief in gray eyes a second before Draco sweeps his tongue out, curving it beneath the head of Ron's cock." Ron watches Draco so attentively throughout this scene. It's really the actions, not the words, that speak the loudest here. Short, subtle, and poignant.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

synn
2008-01-06 04:29 am UTC (link)

Which perhaps this pairing should be.
oh good : ) I honestly didn't know what I was doing with the pairing, since I've never read Ron/Draco and hardly ever read anything w/ Ron as the main character, even.
And I figured the understanding had to be unspoken, b/c I can't picture either of them willing to admit their feelings aloud. Not, as you said, at the beginning at least.

Thank you for commenting, and I'm glad you liked it!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	envinyatar15 2007-12-16 03:43 pm UTC (link)
	Somehow this feels very realistic - there's awkwardness and insecurity, and your language just beautifully emphasises that. Also that they care for each other. It's just... lovely, really. This story touches my heart :) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:31 am UTC (link)
	This story touches my heart :) That's a huge compliment in my book (in any writer's, I would think). Thank you very much! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	brandil 2007-12-18 07:03 pm UTC (link)
	Yummy. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:32 am UTC (link)
	Thanks : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	glockgal 2007-12-24 06:05 pm UTC (link)
	Mmm, this is as calm and tranquil as sipping hot spiced tea on a cold winterday - the perfect bit of smutty delight for the holidays! Something I didn't expect from a Ron/Draco fic, and yet you made their dynamics work well. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:37 am UTC (link)
	Thank you, always happy to provide a little warmth for the holidays. I'm glad you enjoyed it : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

kennahijja
2007-12-29 08:28 pm UTC (link)

What a wonderful read! I loved the atmosphere of the story immensely, so well characterised by Draco's bare flat, and the way that Ron and Draco manage to bring it to life together. And I enjoyed the sex immensely - the dirty talk (not something I usually enjoy, but it worked very well here) and the breath-play felt perfectly natural and un-forced and un-dramatic here - just a perfect addition to heighten pleasure.

The ending has a touch of bitter-sweetness, because the story shows how well Ron and Draco fit together, but it's sad to see them having to keep their relationship secret. Which again, perfectly fits the atmosphere. I read Draco's flat as a symbol for their wider surroundings here, which looks pretty bleak except for the, well, heat generated inside :). Awesome! Thanks for writing and sharing this!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

synn
2008-01-06 04:45 am UTC (link)

Thank you!
the way that Ron and Draco manage to bring it to life together

That was the idea behind the title, in a way -- the little pocket of air they create for themselves to 'breathe', within the more depressing reality of their lives. So, you're interpretation of Draco's flat is absolutely what I was aiming for : ) It's so nice to know it came across as intended! I'm really glad you liked it, and thanks again for commenting.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	lalaith_niniel 2007-12-30 06:12 am UTC (link)
	This was so hot, and yet heartbreaking at the same time. There's a sense of desperation and desolation here, that this isn't the perfect life, but it's what Draco and Ron have, so they might as well get what they can from it. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:47 am UTC (link)
	Thank you, I'm sorry you found it heartbreaking; everything I write seems to turn out sad, lol. But I'm glad you found it hot, too : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	no_mad_skillz 2008-01-01 02:50 am UTC (link)
	This is lovely and sexy and melancholy. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	synn 2008-01-06 04:48 am UTC (link)
	Thank you : ) (Reply to this) (Parent)

	ships_harry 2008-01-01 08:22 pm UTC (link)
	Breathplay. mph. Hot. Something about the language here is really lovely, too; I'm a sucker for present tense, but there was something elegant about a lot of your phrasing. And contrasted against Ron's rough dirty talk. Ohh, yes. (Reply to this) (Thread)

synn
2008-01-06 04:55 am UTC (link)

Breathplay. mph. Hot.
Oh good, I was afraid it was too mild to really qualify. It's one of my favorite kinks, though rarely used I think...

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<i>Breathplay. mph. Hot.</i>
Oh good, I was afraid it was too mild to really qualify. It's one of my favorite kinks, though rarely used I think...

<I'm a sucker for present tense, but there was something elegant about a lot of your phrasing. And contrasted against Ron's rough dirty talk. Ohh, yes.>

Present tense is the easiest to connect with, it draws us in more (imho), though maybe I've just made that up because I'm a sucker for it too. : )
It was really difficult finding the right tone for this story, balancing how I imagine Ron's voice with my own voice and the dirty talk -- it's really nice to know it worked, Thank you!

(Reply to this) (Parent)

InsaneJournal

To: kangeikoFrom: synn

To: kangeiko
From: synn