InsaneJournal

Current mood:	cynical
Entry tags:	penguins in space verse, penguins: brian/margo, penguins: matt/jared

For MonroeNell (Penguins, gen, 13/15ish)



title: Why Do We Let Uncle Batshit Babysit?
author: lisa roquin
rating: 15ish
verse: Penguins
characters/pairings: Jared(/Matt), Brian/Margo, Corie, Bree, MattyJay(/Vincent)
word count: 955


"Why do we leave the kids with your Uncles again?" Brian muttered entering the house. The fresh tattoo on Corie's upper arm was the first thing he noticed. Still covered in a clear derma-seal. He had to wonder if leaving the kids at home alone for a week wouldn't have been smarter. The girls were seventeen, MattyJay was fifteen. It wasn't like they couldn't take care of themselves, and only likely to trash the house, the police would call if they got arrested or something.

Margo ignored him, she was already three steps past him and squealing at the twins matching tattoos. Of course she would think they were cute. His daughters had matching fricken penguins with pink scarves around their necks and the Mars Glyphs on the damn scarves.

"Do you have a tatt, too?" Brian asked his son.

"Nope. Uncle Matt said I had to wait til I was done growing. It'd get messed up and end up looking like shit if it stretched. Better to wait til I'm about twenty."

"Language," Brian said reflexively. He was shocked MattyJay was taking the fact he wasn't getting upset at tatts being put out of his reach for a while so well. Matt had a point, and the twins were basically the same height now they had been at friggin thirteen.

"Where is Matt?"

"Airport. Aunt Dessie is taking Annie and Ruby to Abuelo and Abuelita's early."

Brian winced. Yeah. He remembered that. How could he forget that? They were all supposed to be in New Jersey next week.

He'd rather have a root canal without novacain.

He hadn't recovered from Bree and Corie's quinceanera yet. Or Annie and Ruby's.

There was no way they were missing Daniela's though. She was Brad and Debbie's youngest, and just as damn pushy and talkative as her mother. Maybe worse. Daniela was the youngest of eight. Somehow also one of MattyJay's best friends. How the hell that happened with them growing up on seperate coasts was beyond Brian, but he'd learned long ago not to argue with any of the crazy his wife's family came up with, including the somewhat saner Santiago and Cortez clans.

He gritted his teeth as the girls started babbling. Studio time. Yeah. Goddamned studio time. Gracie this and Rayray that and Vincent...

"JaredMatthew..." Brian frowned and tugged at the collar of his son's shirt. Since when the hell did MattyJay wear turtlenecks? "Nice hickey," He muttered drolly. "She got a name?"

"Vince."

"Vince?" Brian raised an eyebrow. No. His son could not mean...

Brian turned an arch look on his wife's batshit Uncle suddenly there and hovering like some rabid deranged broody hen. He should know. He spent enough time listening to Gerard going on about his goddamned hen house and chickens and the ones that laid the best eggs--Elvira, Hazel and Mystique--and Frank having fits about the freaking maharaja's palace of a chicken coop.

Refereeing the battle that erupted when Gerard pointed out his chickens lived in more luxury than Frank's dogs and weren't forced to wear stupid clothes....Brian still hadn't quite forgiven Gerard for sticking him with referreeing that mess eight months later. And his son said...

MattyJay crossed his arms over his chest and set his jaw, looking every bit as insane and dangerous as his great uncles. Hereditary traits by osmosis. He never should have let Margo name the kid after her Uncles. Neither were all that sane and had tempers straight from hell. That MattyJay's temper was every bit as bad as his Great-Uncle Matt or Great-Uncle Batshit's wasn't news. That MattyJay was as insane as his great-uncles was.

"Vincent...Way" Brian whispered.

"Yeah." MattyJay bit out.

Jared loomed closer.

"Goddamn. You couldn't go for Rayray at least? Rayray's fairly sane."

"Gracie'd kill me!" MattyJay snorted. "And Ray's straight."

Grace was dating Rayray? Jesus. He was stuck managing a band that he didn't want to manage at all ever, or at least not until there were college diplomas all around because there was no way he could get out of managing them not when it was his daughters, Grace and Vincent Way and Rayray Toro making up the band, and hell if they weren't his daughters, Gracie, Vince and Rayray he'd kill to manage them. They were that good.

A band he didn't want to manage though. And it seemed a band that there was the worry of the lead guitarist and the bassist splitting up or the lead guitarist knocking up the bassist--and if that ever happened he just knew he was going to be the one stuck breaking it to their parents. He made a mental note to jump Alicia about making sure Grace was on some kind of birth control.

"Vincent?" Brian whined.

MattyJay glared.

"What's wrong?" Margo looked at him.

"Uncle Batshit's the worlds worst babysitter. Why do we leave the kids with him again? Your son has a hickey from his boyfriend and your daughters have tattoos."

Margo's look almost made MattyJay back down. "Boyfriend?"

"Vincent."

"The boy is as batshit as his uncles. It's your fault. I--hell. Shannon's supposed to call Gerard about goats," Brian muttered as he remembered that bit of insanity. "He's thinking about getting one for Toni."

"What would Toni do with a goat?" MattyJay frowned.

"Fucked if I know, but Vincent's almost as bad as his father and you're the one dating him." Brian muttered. "You come home with someone that acts like Uncle Batshit I'm disowning you."

Jared glared. The expression the not lethal, amused but still trying to look pissed one now. He'd been around his wife's crazy family too long--that he knew the difference in the crazy-glares was proof.

MattyJay rolled his eyes.

Margo just laughed.