Bobbi Morse is mocking you (ex_agentnine95) wrote in jurassiccitynet, @ 2015-11-05 12:17:00 |
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Entry tags: | bobbi morse / mockingbird |
When I was undercover in HYDRA, I had choices that I had to make. I had to keep myself in, make them believe that I was one of them. So, I gave them safe houses. I let them believe that I was turning over agents for the cause. I purposely gave up the ones that I knew probably wouldn't have any agents in them. The ones that I knew had agents in them, I didn't give up. I told them that those were one duds, they were better off checking the ones that I secretly knew for a fact would be empty.
Except one of them wasn't empty. One of them had one agent in it. I didn't know. I gave up that safe house, because the other one that I could've given up had over a dozen SHIELD agents in it. Agents that if I had given up that safe house, all of their blood would've been on my hands. The lives of over a dozen agents outweighed the chance of a safe house that was probably empty. Except it wasn't empty. It had someone in it. That someone did get taken in by HYDRA, her mind was mutilated and broken. That was on my hands.
I was wrong for not owning up to it. I felt guilty that had had happened to Kara. But at the same time, I didn't feel guilty. I still don't feel guilty. I wouldn't change the choice I made. I made a choice, and I chose to save the house where I knew that there would be agents who had a chance to get out, over the house that might or might not have someone in it.
I don't care if it makes an awful person. I know I've made a lot of choices that other people look down on me for. I did what I thought was right. I'll always do what I think is right, even if other people might look down on me. In my line of work, that's a risk I have to take.