Maddie Johnson (returninspades) wrote in immune_ic, @ 2013-03-04 00:03:00 |
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Entry tags: | # 2013 [03] march, dillon, maddie |
WHO: Maddie and DJ
WHEN: March 4, 2020; evening
WHERE: Maddie and Caitie's room
WHAT: Bonding over music/poetry things.
RATING: Low/Medium.
Guilt was a funny thing. Maddie wasn't a stranger to it, but she didn't like allowing guilty feelings to get in the way of having a good time. Life was supposed to be lived to the fullest, wasn't it? Especially now. Drowning in guilt wasn't how she wanted to spend her time. Most days, she used her humor (or, in some cases, her spitefulness) to push those negative feelings away from herself. It was entirely selfish and entirely Maddie's default. When it was finally acknowledged, it was as crushing as depression. Lately, Maddie hadn't been a very good sister to her younger brother. Actually, if she was completely honest with herself, it had been several years since she'd actually been kind and decent to him. Part of it was due to lingering resentment for his being a recluse for so long. She didn't understand his methods for coping. To her, it was cowardly. For whatever reason, it was more cowardly than Zach's coping methods. Drinking himself stupid. Maddie had found it in herself to completely forgive her oldest brother. Now, she decided, it was time she found a way to reconcile things with the youngest. DJ said that it was enough that she tried to understand him, but... it really wasn't. So, she'd taken one of his poems – the most recent one about trees or whatever – and started studying it, trying to come up with a melody that fit. She wasn't a music expert by any means, but with their dad having been in the music business, it was inevitable, really, that she'd garnered some knowledge from it. The more she worked with the poem, the more she realized that it wasn't even really about trees at all. She knew DJ had some sort of whatever thing going on with Luke's sister. It only made sense that it was something about her. Maddie could somewhat relate, in a vague way, because of whatever feelings she was developing for Caitie. She'd sent a quick text to DJ, asking if he was free tonight and if he wanted to come hang out for a while. There was a very good chance this plan of hers could blow up in her face and make things even worse between the two of them, but with one of her favorite holidays upcoming, she was in a good enough mood to try. If things went well, maybe she'd even ask him to dye his hair green. |