|wanking_mods (wanking_mods) wrote in hp_wankfest,|
@ 2008-05-23 00:01:00
|Entry tags:||2008 fic|
Teddy Lupin in a Hidden Passageway with the Marauders' Map
Character: Teddy Lupin
Location: hidden passageway
Object: Marauder's Map
Other Characters: Harry, Neville
Word Count: 1165
Disclaimer: Not mine, not making money, not condoning anything illegal.
Author's Notes: Slightly ridiculous. Thanks to beta K; any remaining mistakes are mine.
Teddy Lupin has always been prone to violent, painful hiccups. He gets them at least once a week, though more often around the full moon. After a thorough examination by Madame Pomfrey in Teddy’s first year, it is decided that the spasms are caused more by nerves than any trace of genetic lycanthropy. This does explain why, during exams, he gets such drastic attacks that he has to be sent from the room so as not to disturb the other students.
It’s not really a bad condition, Teddy tells himself. It’s certainly not as bad as losing one’s mind once a month. It doesn’t hurt that much—if anything, Teddy mostly hates the feeling of not being able to control his body. It’s similar to when his hair changes colours without his permission, or when his voice suddenly shoots up two octaves before dropping down with a crackle.
By third year, though, Teddy has pretty much figured out how to handle the hiccups. Water doesn’t help, and the entirety of Slytherin house at one point took it upon themselves to scare him cured (it didn’t work, but he had nightmares for a month). Madame Pomfrey doesn’t have any potions for him, and holding his breath only makes it worse. There are really only two things to do: try not to think about them—they always go away after an hour or so, usually when he’s not paying attention—or… well. The other, more immediate solution is not something he can do in class or in the Hospital Wing. It’s a rare treat, really—if the hiccups are bad enough to get him excused from class (or kicked out, if they’re that disruptive, and they sometimes are), Teddy won’t bother going to Pomfrey, but skips straight back to his empty dorms and flings himself on his bed, not even bothering to shut the curtains because he knows perfectly well that no fellow Ravenclaw would dare skive off.
It’s not that the act of wanking itself helps, but nothing can stop the hiccups in their tracks quite like a hot, fast orgasm.
Early into his third year, Teddy finds out that while he can’t be scared out of his hiccups, he can be scared into them. On his way from Transfiguration to Charms, he’s grabbed by a pair of sweaty palms, one over his mouth, the other tight on his elbow. He is dragged backwards into a cramped broom closet and his first hiccup is so big his whole body jerks with it.
"It's me." Harry's voice is hot in his ear, and Teddy immediately relaxes even as the next hiccup jerks through. Harry lets go and Teddy turns to see that he is grinning ear to ear. Harry reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of very battered, very old parchment. "I thought you should receive this the same way I did," Harry says, low and wicked. Teddy hiccups loudly.
"A bit of old parchment? I’m touched," he chuckles. "You came all the way here for this?"
"Merlin, you're even getting the lines right," Harry breathes, looking weirdly misty for a moment. It clears quickly. "After you graduate, you ask George about this. For now—tap it, and say, I solemnly swear I am up to no good. After, you tap it and say mischief managed."
Teddy stares at Harry, who looks a little more manic than Teddy has seen him. "Right," he says, and hiccups. "And…. What?"
Harry leans in—way in—and murmurs, "Trust me. And get to class, you’re late."
With that, Teddy’s tumbling out of the closet and Harry’s already striding down the hall.
It’s only two weeks later, but Teddy’s a quick boy, and it took him about this long to figure out how to get in and out of the castle through the two passages still left open. It’s also full moon in the middle of the afternoon, and Teddy’s got a terrible case of the hiccups.
"Lupin!" Professor Longbottom looks close to despair, which may have something to do with the fact that Teddy's hiccups have disturbed the Venemous Tentacula into attempting to eat him. "Teddy," Professor Longbottom starts again, softening somewhat once he's beaten off the fanged vines, "For the love of—please go take care of that, would you? You can make up the work later." Teddy nods frantically, and is already half-hard with anticipation as he rushes out of the greenhouse.
He doesn't even bother to pretend to go back up to the castle. No one is out at this hour of the afternoon, and no one ever bothers to patrol the grounds for wayward students. He makes a beeline for the Whomping Willow, pulling out the Marauder’s Map as he goes.
Teddy freezes the tree with a spell to the knot, so that he doesn’t have to put away the map to find a branch, and he slips quickly into the roots and down into the tunnel. The air down here is dry and musty, the sort of smell that comes from ancient dirt and roots. He barely manages to get halfway through the tunnel, bent down low, and finally stops, flings himself to the dry dirt floor, already fumbling to open his robes and trousers.
He hiccups, hard, and the hiccup only increases his need for the cure for the hiccups, and, Marauder’s Map still clutched in one hand, he drops his wand and grabs his cock. His moan is damped down by the tunnel, and his own breathing sounds too loud, and Teddy thinks of who else may have done this, may have used the Map to find someplace quiet to wank because they really, really needed it. Harry, surely, must have figured this out—Uncles Fred and George—maybe even his father. Maybe he was wanking in the same place all of them had wanked, a long line of desperate boys yanking their pants open, not caring where their wands fall, groaning aloud when they wrap their hands around their cocks, secure in the knowledge that no one will find them, no one can hear them.
He thinks of Harry doing this, and then he thinks of how he got the Map—how Harry got the Map, too. Teddy thinks of Harry’s hand on his mouth, Harry’s breath on him. Harry has big hands, and hot breath, and Teddy almost thinks he could remember tasting the metallic tang of Harry’s wedding ring, when Harry dragged him into the cupboard—his hand’s moving fast, and his toes are curling in his shoes. Teddy groans low, and the noise is cut off by an explosive hiccup. He comes.
Teddy emphatically does not go back to Herbology, but he’s muddy enough that he could pass for having spent the whole afternoon fighting off carnivorous plants with Professor Longbottom. It’s not 'til he's made it back up to Ravenclaw, still flushed and pink and a little shaky, that he remembers to wipe the map.