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Bellatrix Isabelle Black Lestrange ([info]darkest_belle) wrote in [info]houseofgaunt,
@ 2008-09-13 02:01:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:bellatrix lestrange, rodolphus lestrange

Who: Bella and Rod
What: Fighting over whats happened, but this time their fighting goes too far.
Where: Bella's flat
When: Late Friday night.
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: This thread is not for the faint of heart. If you have an issue with rape, DO NOT GO PAST THE CUT.
Status: Closed/Complete.





Bella just stared down at her journal and the few words he had written. This was fucking ridiculous. How much longer was he going to pout over what happened? It was driving her mad the way they were tip toeing around each other and avoiding the other. She would much rather just fight like they normally did, get it done and over with and move on. Or not. Depending on what he wanted. She knew he had a right to upset and angry, and she wasn't denying him that. But this was enough. Either fight with her about it or decide that their relationship could no longer work after what had happened.

She hoped he wouldn't take the second option. Even though she had strayed, she still loved him, more than was probably healthy for a person to do, but this was too much. Bella wasn't one to just sit around and wait for things to happen. Growling in frustration she threw her journal at the wall and got up from the couch.

Heading into her...their...bedroom she grabbed her wand off of the table and pocketed it before heading for the door. Perhaps a walk would help to clear her head. If not, well it couldn't get much worse in there than it already was. Checking to make sure the wards around her flat were working properly she made sure everything was in place before heading for the door, thinking that Hyde Park would be a good place for her to clear her head.


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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 02:31 am UTC (link)
This wasn't the firt time Rodolphus had been pacing up and down Knockturn Alley. He wanted to confront her, wanted to hear her speak the truth and yell at her for it. But he wasn't sure exactly what he was going to say to her. The rage was building up so badly he wasn't sure how much control he had over himself. Sure he was very pissed about what had happened, but some part still didn't want to say the wrong thing and hurt her feelings. By this point, he didn't know what he was capable of.

By the look on Rod's face, any passer by wouldn't notice a thing. He was pretty good at keeping everything bottled up. But he was running out of strength to keep it all inside. How could she do that to him?! Even in their first life he never strayed from her. Maybe it was a sign of how pathetic and in love he was...No. It was devotion. Plain and simple. Was it too much to ask for that same devotion?!

Rodolphus felt his heart tighten as he finally made a decision subconsciously. His mind was on such a rant, it only paused when he realized he was standing right outside the door to Bella's flat. As if she heard him coming the door swung open and there she stood. The engines were running strong in Rodolphus, but even seeing her again made air catch in his throat. Without any thought he pushed passed her into the flat, walking a few feet away then spinning back around to stare at the love of his life.

With his eyes burning and his jaw locked, he didn't utter a word. His mind was racing and he was trying to decide what he wanted to say first. Questions, accusations, name calling, he didn't know where to start.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 02:43 am UTC (link)
So lost in thought she had been, Bella didn't even notice him standing on the other side of the door. It wasn't until he brushed past her that she glanced up, confusion on her face at first but it was quickly replaced with a blank as she stared at him, frozen on the outside but inside her heart and her mind were racing. She wanted to apologize to him and beg for him to forgive her but Bella was tired of begging and pleading with people. Tired of having to always apologize for her actions and try to make everything.

She knew what she had done went beyond anything that had happened between them before and that on some level she knew that there was possibly no way to fix this, but she loved him far too much to give up without a fight. To just let things end like they were currently between them. Bella wanted to explain, to try and make him understand that it would never happen again. That it was never going to happen again. She had walked away from Julian, turned her back on him and everything he had offered to her in that one afternoon, and all for the man standing in front of her. The moment he had shown back up, regardless of the reasons and circumstances surrounding his being gone for as long as he had been, everything had changed.

A thousand different comments ran through her mind and a thousand other things but her brain and her mouth did not want to cooperate. So instead she simply stood there, staring at him, waiting for something to happen.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 02:58 am UTC (link)
Rodolphus was surprised by Bella's silence. Especially when somebody just randomly showed up at her house. Typically she was more demanding about why they where there. This time there was no reason for her to ask. The minutes passed by in utter silence as they stared at each other. Rodolphus had barely noticed the time. His mind was far too wrapped up in itself.

Finally his lips took control, "Why the hell didn't you look for me? Didn't you think it odd that in the middle of a romantic getaway, I just randomly vanished?" As he spoke the volume of his voice continued to increase as the emotion leaked. Just after speaking he could feel the anger intensify within in him. Speaking his thoughts was only fuel to the fire.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 03:08 am UTC (link)
She remained impassive and cool on the outside, refusing to react to his words or the anger laced behind them. But inside was a completely different story. She flinched at the anger in his voice, something she had hoped to never to have to hear again. Flashes of the last time they had fought where he had sounded like that ran through her mind, the end result sounding loud and clear.

Whore.

"What do you want me to say Rodolphus? How many times have we done this song and dance before? How many times have we done the whole fight and then make up and then go away together dance only to have it dissolve in a couple of days? What the hell was I supposed to think? As much as I didn't want for life to be like it had been before it was turning out to be just that.

Its not like it was the first time you had just upped and disappeared during a romantic holiday for us. How the fuck was I supposed to know that this time was any different than all of the others?"

Her tone was icy and cold as she refused to back down, refused to give in, her gaze locked with his as she dared to tell her otherwise. Dared him to tell her it was all a lie. They had done this dance a thousand times before, but she idly wondered, if this was going to be the last time for it.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 03:18 am UTC (link)
"That was in our first life! Our last little dance, if you recall, was us spilling the truth about that first life and how we had always loved each other through all the bullshit. We both said we'd never cheated! Why would this time suddenly be different if I really had left by choice?"

Rod's thoughts were similar to hers, wondering if they made up if something similar would happen all over again. Even through all the fighting, he trusted her at least to stay faithful. Now he didn't know what to think. If they made up, would she run off to another guy as soon as they bickered about him leaving the toilet seat up?

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 03:28 am UTC (link)
"AND I NEVER HAD," she screamed at him as she turned away from him, her frustration reaching an all new level as she paced away from him. This was not helping. At least not that she could see.

Spinning back around after she had gone but a few feet she stared at him, the icy mask slipping back into place once more.

"I didn't plan for it to happen Rodolphus. I never once set out to deliberately hurt you or cheat on you. Gods do you honestly think, after everything that has happened, after everything I told you that my intentions would be that?

It happened. But it will never happen again."

She didn't know what else to say to him. What else she could do to convince him that what she said was true. It never would happen again. The only person who had ever appealed to her, other than Rodolphus, wanted nothing to do with her after what she had done. Even if it were possible, her actions had ruined any chance she may have had with Julian.

But she didn't want it. She wanted what was standing right in front of her, but Bella was at a loss as to how to convince him of that.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 03:39 am UTC (link)
"I believe that you didn't intend to sleep with either of them, but try some fucking self control! When it got down to it, all you had to do was walk away! But no, you gave in. Hubby went poof, no rules now! Did you ever once think I could be in trouble?"

Rodolphus took a breath at this point, but he took it in quick before she could even answer his question. At this point his brain was no longer in control of his mouth. His temper was slowly taking over everything.

"When you disappeared, I searched for you high and low. I was worried to death! I didn't assume you had just up and left because I thought things had changed. Did you not think I had changed? I used to leave randomly because I couldn't stand to watch you ignore me! That changed, so why wouldn't I?"

Through all of his pacing he had been trying to come up with a speech or something to get all of his feelings out on the table so they could talk through it all. But now that he was in the moment, all the planning had gone out the window. There had never been a set plan, but what he had before was better than what he was doing.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 02:23 pm UTC (link)
Bella visibly flinched at that, the first emotion or reaction she had shown since he had shown up. He might as well have called her a whore with those words. Her eyes narrowed into dark slits as she glared at him, her temper rearing its ugly head at his next set of words.

"That was different," she hissed, her eyes flashing dangerously as she took a step back, trying to put some distance between before she did something she would regret. "You knew I was missing and that I had been taken. I had nothing from you. Nothing. No answer from any of the owls I sent, no answers to any of my journal entries, nothing except like it had been before when you would ignore me. So you tell me how I was supposed react. What I was supposed to think of the whole thing.

If I had known, if there had been any hint to me that you were in danger or trouble do you think I would not have done the same thing? That I wouldn't have done everything possible that I was able to to bring you home?"

Frustrated she turned away from him her hand coming up to pinch the bridge of her nose as she attempted to keep some check and control over her emotions.

"Our history is always repeating itself. Why would this time be any different?" She hadn't meant to say the words out loud but they had slipped out anyhow. It didn't matter though perhaps it would be a good thing for them to get everything out and into the open between them.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 03:30 pm UTC (link)
Though her words would have made sense to anyone, they evaded Rodolphus completely. At this point there was very little that could penetrate his one track mind. It was like he could see a bright neon sign above Bella's head with an arrow pointing down saying, "Cheater!"

Her question hindered him for a second as he was struck with disbelief. "I thought we were completely different! After that first argument we had when I returned, it seemed everything was going change. If I expected this life to be like the first one, I wouldn't have stayed with you! If I knew you were going to fucking other men-not even men! Come on! Fenrir?! Are you fucking kidding me? Anyone who has sex with him is actually in an orgy with his fleas!"

Rodolphus's face was turning red. He was obviously at boiling point. As the words spilled from his mouth he started to visualize Fenrir fucking Bella. Without thought he suddenly closed the distance between them and had a hand firmly gripping Bella's upper arm. His voice lowered in volume, but the tone was just as harsh and full of pain. "What could they give you that I can't?"

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 03:39 pm UTC (link)
The blood drained from her face at his words and she took a step back as though he had actually hit her. His verbal assult might as well have been a physical one the way it cut through her. They had fought before, but never had it been anything like this. And for once, it truly frightened her that they may not be able to make it back from this. That perhaps she truly had pushed too far.

"Let go of me," she stated softly, her voice never rising any higher but the threat laced behind it was loud and clear. Let go or she would force him to let go..

"I told you it was never about that. The wolf was a moment of insanity on my part. You can join the club in being disgusted about that for I am as well." She paused though as thoughts of Julian made their way into her head and for once she was at a loss for words. Unable to explain that one away, for she couldn't. Fenrir had never even compared to Rodolphus and what he could do to her, but Julian...that was a completely different story.

And it bothered her that there was another person in this world, other than Rodolphus, who could do those things to her. Who could make her feel like that and not make her feel ashamed of her body and the way it reacted. It had always been like that with Rodolphus and she had never expected it to be like that with anyone else, until Julian had approached her like he had.

"It was never about them or you, Rodolphus. And it was never about my needing to look some place else because I was dissatisfied with anything here or with you. That has never been the case and that will never be the case." Her words trailed off as frustration showed itself on her face once more. Frustrated that she didn't know how to get through to him or how to make this better.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 03:57 pm UTC (link)
Rodolphus made no move to release her arm. If he let her go, he felt she may run to yet another man. How the hell was he supposed to keep her all to himself? She was devoted up until he was abducted. That hadn't even been his fault of course, so there was nothing he could do to stop her. He just trusted that never in a million different lives would she betray him.

"Of course, it was all about you, Bella. You needed a good fuck and they just happened to be around. Funny, I noticed all you talk about is Fenrir. What about the other man? Is he just too good to talk about?" Rodolphus's voice was eerily low with hints of anger. Most of the rage was etched on his face. He was acting like he did when his bloodlust was strong. Like it did back when they killed innocents for the Dark Lord. It was the calm before the storm. He seemed almost relaxed right before he would snap.

His face was a mere two inches from hers, his hot breath on her skin. He could feel the tension radiating from her, and even felt her skin pulse from his tight grip on her arm. Rodolphus was one of the few people who truly knew how powerful Bella was. Suicidal or homicidal, he was ready for anything and didn't give a damn about how it ended.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 04:06 pm UTC (link)
"Don't," she said quietly, the fear seeping into her voice in that one word. Never once, in all the time they had been together had she ever been afraid of Rodolphus. Never had she been afraid of him and his reactions, but this, this was a side of him she had never seen directed at her before and honestly, it scared her.

Summoning up as much strength as she could she tried to pull her arm away from him, tried to put some space between them so that the both of them could think more clearly and possibly more level headed but where Bella was the stronger of the two magically Rodolphus was stronger than her physically, as well as bigger than her and all her struggles did was make the skin under his hand hurt more than it already did.

"Let go of me Rodolphus, now." There was an icy edge to her voice, but the panic and fear were seeping into it quickly the longer she tried to get away from him and found that she couldn't. This needed to stop and they both needed to take a step back before something happened that they would both regret.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 04:24 pm UTC (link)
"What? No answer? Seems Julian was better than I thought. What did he do that was so great?" His voice was getting louder again and he shook her arm a bit as he spoke. "Was it the greatest screw of your life?! Tell me what he did that was so damn great!" The grip was tightening. At this rate he'd probably leave a few bruises without even trying.

Each time she addressed the grip on her arm Rodolphus was deaf to it. No matter how she answered his questions the words would never sink in. Anything she said just sounded like excuses. All of it was just an attempt to rid herself of the blame. Maybe one day he would understand her thinking for his disappearance, but it all came down to her choices and how she made the wrong ones. And then to escape the consequences she turned to death. Rodolphus firmly believed suicide was the chicken shit way out of life. She made her choices and had to deal with the result of them.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 04:31 pm UTC (link)
"Rodolphus don't, please. I'm sorry." The fear was now evident in her voice as she struggled harder to get away from him. She would not have this discussion with him while he was like this. There was no point in trying to reason with him when he couldn't even see what reason was.

"Your hurting me, let go." Once more she tried to pull her arm out of his grasp, only succeeding in pulling them closer, the last thing she wanted in that moment. She didn't think he would ever physically hurt but then again she had never seen this side of before so anything she normally thought didn't apply.

Her mind began to shut down as she continued to struggle, her thoughts turning to the past few weeks and how she had fucked up royally. Some part of her knew that she deserved this, that she deserved the accusations and the anger coming from him, but that didn't make it any better. It didn't make the pain, both physically and mentally ease up any less.

"Rodolphus, let go of me, I'm begging you, let go of me."

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 04:43 pm UTC (link)
"Again! You refuse to answer my questions! Is he that important to you?" Rodolphus's hand jumped from her arm to the back of her neck, gripping it tight enough that she couldn't pull free. He put his lips close to her ear and spoke softly, "I gave you everything. I've always been by your side, even when you didn't want me there. Apparently I'm just not enough."

Without unfastening them, Rodolphus shoved his free hand down the front of Bella's pants. His large hand cupped her groin and his fingers began to maneuver the underwear out of the way. "Ah, familiar territory. Though now it's been invaded by others. Did he touch you first? Or did he skip the foreplay entirely?" He slipped a finger inside her and rubbed her clit with his thumb. "This is what you want right? To get off and move on."

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 04:57 pm UTC (link)
"No." Panic was now racing through her as his hand moved and she was no longer able to move to try and get away from him. This had reached a new level, one Bella was not comfortable with, at all. And it scared the hell out of her that they were in this position.

"Please don't," she begged quietly at his words, trying not to cry in front of him. "Rodolphus, please, stop. Don't do this. I'm sorry. Gods you have no idea how sorry I am."

She froze when he moved, her body unable to pull away, unable to get away from what her mind was screaming was going to happen. He wouldn't. She flinched at the burn that came with his touch, her body rebelling against it all.

"Stop. Gods Rodolphus, please stop." Her eyes darted around quickly as she tried to find some way out of this, but none presented themselves to her.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 05:13 pm UTC (link)
Bella's words went in one ear and out the other. Nothing was getting through to him. The world was his to toy with and Bella was in it. She was always in it. Hell, the woman haunted him. Bella was always his world and she'd squashed it like a bug.

Rodolphus slowly pulled his hand out of her pants. It seemed as if he'd heard her pleas, but really he was just taking his time. Adrenaline was pulsing through him with the anger and it created a drug-like effect. The world was slightly blurred and he could only focus on the thing in front of him.

Rodolphus summoned his wand and it was in his hand in a second. With one hand still on Bella's neck, he used it to push her toward the side of the couch and bent her forward over the arm. With a flick of the wand her clothes were gone. Another flick and his skin was bare along with hers. He could see old bruises and scars along her body, but she'd always had some sort of blemish, so it hardly phased him. No doubt she was still weak from the most recent event that hurt her. Rodolphus was still recovering as well, but all the adrenaline blocked out the bit of protest coming from his healing injuries.

He leaned over Bella, his bare chest on her back. With his cheek to hers he murmured, "Seems I haven't been enough for you in the past. Let's see if I can surpass the great Julian Derrick." Rodolphus stood straight and penetrated his wife. There honestly wasn't a single bit of sexual pleasure in it for him. It was all just pure grief and hatred.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 05:34 pm UTC (link)
A small sigh of relief escaped from her lips as his hands left her body and her mouth opened, words to suggest that they both just take a step back for a moment so as to be able to think clearly but the words died instantly as she watched his wand appear in his hand, her eyes widening as her body froze in fear.

Wordless cries came from her lips as he grabbed her and all but dragged her towards the couch, her cries raising in volume as she found herself forced over the arm.

"RODOLPHUS STOP! PLEASE I'M BEGGING YOU STOP!" Her mind was on over load, panicking over what was happening. He wouldn't, he couldn't. He loved her, he would never go that far with her.

But when her clothes disappeared and she felt his do the same as well her mind blanked, the panic reaching an all new high as she felt his body on hers, the tremors racing through her as she silently begged him to stop, unable to do so verbally as the tears she had been fighting spilled over and slid down her cheeks.

Her scream echoed loudly in the room as he forced himself into her, the pain unlike anything she had ever felt before. Her cries and pleas for him to stop and to listen to her fell upon dear ears and after a moment she became quiet, and still. Her head hung low, her hair falling over her face as she shut down, retreated to some dark corner in her mind, all the while praying it would be over soon and that her husband would return to her. For the man doing this to her was not the man she loved, nor was it the man she had married.

"I'm sorry love, I never meant for this to happen," she whispered - her words coming out in stutters as she tried to fight past the pain and the tears. Her eyes slipped closed and her body went limp as she waited for it to be over, waited for whatever they had once had to come to end. For even though she loved him, this was not something she could ever forgive.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 05:50 pm UTC (link)
His hips thrust into her over and over again. Her words meant nothing. An image of her and Julian was all that was in his mind. That boy fucking his wife and her smiling with pleasure. For all he knew they'd done it on his and Bella's own bed. The thoughts made him thrust harder, taking out all his aggression through the one action. His hand was no longer gripping her neck. With his wand on the floor, both hands were pushing down on Bella's lower back. He wasn't pushing hard, but it was enough force to let her know he had no intention of letting her up.

If this was normal intercourse for them he'd be bent over and probably kissing her neck with intimacy. It'd be rough but love would be evident. This was nothing but forceful and rough. He still loved her, but there was no sign of it.

Though he hadn't heard her screaming, it was her whisper that seemed louder than anything else said. His body was disconnected from his brain. While he continued to thrust his mind went into high gear, careening on multiple paths trying to compute everything that was going on. It was as if during the fight his brain had taken a mini-coma nap. Finally his brain made connection with his body and he stopped moving entirely. He stared a the back of Bella's head. He was in shock. It was that one word, love. Even while he was violating her she referred to him as her love.

Rodolphus pulled out and took a step back, just staring at his wife's body strewn over the couch. No words came past his lips, he'd forgotten how to speak. The rage was still pumping through his veins, but it felt as if he'd suddenly died and his blood was thickening to a dead stop.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 06:02 pm UTC (link)
Bella's hands gripped the couch tightly as she tried to retreat further into her mind, tried to pretend that it wasn't happening, that it wasn't Rodolphus doing this to her but the harder she tried the more it rang true in his mind. Even under circumstances such as these his touch was still familiar, his body still melded with hers.

But that was the only similarities. The pain that raced through her, both physically and mentally told her that it wasn't like any other time they were together and it only made the tears fall faster. Some part of her mind whispered to her that she deserved it. That he had every right to treat as he was and to be as upset as he was. After all she had crossed the ultimate line not once, but twice.

It didn't help though. It hurt more than she could admit for she loved him more than she ever thought was possible with another person. And yet he was still doing this to her.

It took a few moments after he pulled out and moved away from her for her to realize that the pain had eased up some and that she could no longer feel him. She was afraid to open her eyes, afraid to see what would lie in front of her, or the look that would be on his face if he were in front of her so instead she remained as still as she could, her eyes still clenched shut tightly.

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[info]rodo_l
2008-09-13 06:19 pm UTC (link)
Rodolphus couldn't speak, couldn't move. Multiple voices in his head were screaming different things. I'm sorry! You deserve it! What did I just do? How coud I? We're even! Rodolphus shook his head and gripped his hair tightly, almost pulling it out by the roots.

Bella was still motionless. No doubt she was afraid of him. That was something he'd never wanted, not truly. The vengeful side had, but it was gone now, right? She had cheated on him twice, but now he felt like he was by far the most disgusting person. What could he say to her? Absolutely nothing. Just like she couldn't repair what she'd done, there was no way for him to fix this.

Rodolphus began to glance around the room. He had to leave. Had to flee, had to get out. Still feeling a bit paralyzed, he summoned his wand off the floor. A quick flick at himself and he was clothed again. A new face of grief was now on his features. Any other time he had to comfort her would involve him holding her and letting her cry or talk about what was wrong. There wasn't a chance he'd touch her now. If he did she may curse him. He wanted a curse though.

He could stare no longer. He was a monster and he knew it. "I-" His throat locked up and he choked. There was nothing he could say, and he didn't know what to say. Rodolphus stole one last look at Bella's form, unable to see her face. He didn't want to see her face, didn't want to see what he'd done to her. On autopilot he turned and flew out the door, slamming it behind him.

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[info]darkest_belle
2008-09-13 06:35 pm UTC (link)
Bella didn't move again until the sound of the door slamming echoed loudly in her ears. Slowly she opened her eyes, her vision cloudy from the tears that still fell.

"Oh gods," she muttered as she sank to the floor, ignoring the pain that flared through as she did. Her tears fell faster as she drew her knees in against her chest and buried her face in them, rocking back and forth as her sobs echoed loudly in her ears.

What had she done? She had never dreamed that things would get this bad between the two of them, that it would lead to this or that he would ever leave her. And yet they had and he had for the quiet emptiness of her flat told her just that.

"I'm sorry, gods Rodolphus I'm sorry." She sat curled up on the floor for a little while longer, her knees still drawn in tight against her chest as she cried, wondering if this was truly the end of them. That thought alone caused a new level of hysteria to peak inside of her and in an instant she was on her feet. She couldn't stay there, not after. Quickly she moved into her bedroom, the bag appearing on her bed as she pulled on the first clothes she could find, the large sweat shirt swallowing her frame whole as she pulled up the hood on it, hiding her face even more. Glancing in the mirror once, she flinched at the reflection that stared back at her, mocking her with what had just had happened.

Turning she headed back out into the living room, staring at a wall blankly as she summoned her wand, trying to ignore what had just taken place. She couldn't think on it, not now, not so soon.

Bella had no idea where she would go, all she knew was she couldn't stay in the flat any more. And she hoped that where ever she was going, she wouldn't splinch herself along the way.

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