herself_nyc (herself_nyc) wrote in herself_nyc_fic, @ 2008-05-26 21:19:00 |
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She was in his arms, a lady with smooth fragrant skin, giving herself to him, warm body pressed in close, hair falling across his face as he took her throat with a deep and voluptuous bite, at the same time thrusting into her slick pussy. Starting awake, he shuddered, pushing the sensations aside. It was a dream he'd had for decades, sometimes frequently, at other periods more rare. It always disquieted him, because it was bloodthirsty, and because it made him feel unfaithful to Xander, who he thoroughly loved when he was awake and yet somehow had the trick of excluding this way in sleep, when the source of satisfaction became female, and compliant in a way he'd never wanted from Xander. Spike reached for him now, certain of feeling him there, but the arm that his hand fell on was too narrow, and then the aroma that came on his indrawn breath wasn't Xander's at all. Xander was dead. That reality crashed in on him, with the force of something heavy dropped on his head from a great height. It wasn't the first time he'd awakened into the illusion that their time together was still ongoing, that he was in their particular bed that was no more, in a particular room he'd sold away some years back now. Another trick of his mind he'd have liked to suppress. Buffy stirred when he touched her, and put a hand up to cup his jaw. "Hi," she whispered. Spike pulled her in close. Like the lady in the dreamhe'd never before considered that the lady was anyone realher hair fell on his face, and she pressed herself against him, sliding a leg across to rub her wet cunt against his hip. Without a word, he shifted towards her, and she guided his erect cock inside. He let her set the pace; she moved with a languid rhythm, like a vocalist singing just behind the beat. He wondered if she'd been having some kind of dream as well, to be as ready as he was. Xander was still there, hovering in his mind, with the sense that he was playing him false. But Buffy kissed him then, and whispered in his ear, "Sweet, sweet cock, sweet Spike," and the small weight of her bearing down on him, covering him, diffused the past and left him with the right now, the curtain of her hair falling around his face, and her heated breath on his mouth. He returned her kisses, stirred up into her languorous downthrusts. A warm sensation, not romantic, but deeply friendly, came over him; she was a generous sweet woman, she was being good to him. She whispered again. "What shall we do, Spike? Stay here and see the babies some more? Go to St Petersburg? Or" "Or?" She slowed her movements further, down to a soft flexing of her inner muscles around his cock, as if she was breathing him. She didn't speak right away, but he felt her flush, the heat spreading down from her cheeks and neck, through her body clasped in his arms. Her heartbeat picked up. He was curious now. "Or?" She laughed a little. "This is good. I like this." He knew it wasn't what she'd meant to say, but he agreed, and kissed her, caressing her with his hands, running the curve of her back into the swell of the buttocks. She flushed anew. He waited, and then she said, "I'd like to make you happy." What was this? "Ah, would you?" "Could I? How would I do that?" "Dunno." "Really?" It was hard to think when he was getting laid. "What're you sayin', pet?" "I want to give you what you want. Do you want a home again? Something settled and solid? Do you want ... do you want a child? I'll have a child for you, Spike." "Don't talk nonsense." "I'm not." He rolled her beneath him, gave her kisses to stop her mouth as he fucked her. He thought she'd be angry, but she gave way willingly, holding him close, and he could tell by how she breathed and moved that she was excited, that he was pleasing her. Little by little she panted harder, and then began to cry out. When they were finished, and she lay still and slick-skinned beneath him, she cleared her throat. "I meant what I just said. Why is it nonsense?" "Because it is." "You had a life with Xander. You had ... before that you had one with Drusilla. Why can't you have another one with me?" He made his voice as gentle as hers. "Because it's bollocks." "We should still talk about it, Spike." He sighed. "You're a good girl, slayer." "You being all frustrated is what's bollocks." "I'm not frustrated." "You are. You're frustrated and sad, don't you think I know it when I see it? I'm an expert in frustrated and sad. I could write a dissertation on frustrated and sad." "Well, an' if I am, it'll pass." "It probably will. But I want to give you what you want. I know you're not in love with me like you once were, but we're good friends, aren't we? Spike, if you want a home I will make us a home. If you want a wife, I'll marry you. If you want a child" He cut her off. This was becoming excruciating. "I can't give you a bloody child." "True. but I can give you one." "You're just talking a lot of bloody nonsense! You had an abortion a little while agoyou don't want any more truck with bringin' up brats." "I would with you. I will for you." "I don't want anything done for me." She stiffened, and started to pull away. "Buffy. Know I'm makin' a hash of this. What you're offeringdon't mean to discount it. Does you credit. But you know it's not on." "I know nothing of the sort." "No. You're bein' so kind to me. But I know where it's comin' from, yeah? You're just turnin' it around, what I offered you back in Iceland. You didn't want it then an' you don't want it now. Neither do I." "I don't believe you." He was amazed at her truculence. "You little pestyou have to believe me." "I don't. You're trying to be heroic and self-effacing and I'm not buying it. There are things you want, but you're not allowing yourself to want them. And as for me ... I haven't been very happy either. I could use a change." "Playin' house with a vampire is not what you need." "Was it playing house when you lived with Xander for almost seventy years?" She sat up, and even as he reached for her, slipped out of bed. "Okay, okay. Don't get angry at me. We can drop it for now. But think about it."
The action of this story picks up immediately from the conclusion of Some Scenes From The Later Life of Two Heroes. If you haven't read that one, it was a sequel to a longer pair of Spike/Xander stories, which can be read here. The low-down: since her resurrection, Buffy has never aged, and has grown increasingly distant from her surviving adult children and their families. In this far-future fic, after a long lifetime partnered with Xander, Spike has buried him and is at a loose end. He and Buffy have a series of encounters spread out over months, and after averting an apocalypse together, return to London for what might be the beginning of a long-postponed affair. But the past casts long shadows into the present, and the future ....
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