October 2013




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Oct. 3rd, 2013


Who knew being a "lawman" would be so easy. There's a talking cat around here, right? Can you get stuck up a tree so I have something to do?

Oct. 2nd, 2013


Well, it's good to know there's some sort of police force here. And aside from all the pumpkins, this place does remind me a bit of the old homestead. Except that it doesn't smell of lard. It's funny how you come to miss that.

In any case, hullo. My name is Salacia Delorisista Amanita Trigestrata Zeldana Malifee -- in the interest of brevity I'll skip ahead a bit -- Belladonna Eminencia Morticia Jane Zaraphola Margolise von Humpeding, of the Bonk von Humpedings. I am a vampire, but there's no need for alarm: I am a Black Ribboner and I will not harm you. I control the cravings, the red sticky stuff does not control me. These days I much prefer a nice bun and cocoa to bl blo the b-word. Yes.

And, as a newly deputised lawwoman of Halloweentown as well as a sworn officer of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch, I just have a few questions. Let me be clear that this is not an official investigation.

1) What precisely occurs on Halloween? From what I gather, it seems to be a religious ceremony of some significance to the people living and non-living here, but I'd like to know the details.

2) Is anyone here a user of wizardry, witchery, thaumaturgy, hexomancy, or sourcery? Or, er, quantum?

3) Where were you on the night of Thursday the 32nd of Spune, and can anyone verify your whereabouts?

Oct. 1st, 2013


All of this panic is giving me a migraine. I would appreciate it if everyone would calm down so I can think.

Oct. 2nd, 2013


Oh, dear. Where am I, please? This doth not looke like Ankh-Morpork.

Aug. 30th, 2013