InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Ive got a luvly buncha coconut"

smokenmirrors (smokenmirrors) wrote in halcyon_houses,
@ 2008-09-25 13:18:00

Entry tags:

cassandra, max

Week Eighteen: Tuesday
Who: Max and Cassandra
When: Evening
Where: Cassandra’s room

Max was concerned for a number of reasons. First and probably foremost, Cassandra was downplaying whatever was bothering her and that worried him. Clearly she wasn’t the type of person to talk about her problems for fear of the other making a big deal out of them or becoming burdened with trying to find the solution. So really, he had no idea if he was just overreacting to her words or she was not being as forthcoming as she should have been. Either way, he was going to seek out the answer and work to remedy whatever it was that was plaguing her.

Quickly shutting his laptop, Max hurried to slip on some shoes and a t-shirt before hurrying out the door. A few peculiar looks were sent his way, but that was to be expected since he was walking like a man on a mission. For a guy who usually stuck to casually strolling through the halls, the accelerated pace was definitely out of character for him. Not that he cared. All he was concerned with at the moment was getting to Cassandra and finding out what was wrong. Silently he hoped that he was the one overreacting and that whatever it was, really wasn’t a huge deal.

Arriving at the entrance to her house’s common room, he called upon the shadows to conceal his form before slipping through the door. Unfortunately, he had a slight dilemma as he entered what he hoped was the girls’ wing. Since he hadn’t ever been to Cassandra’s room, he had to figure out which it was without knocking on every door or calling out to her. It was in times like these that he could actually appreciate being a demon. Or at least his supernatural sense of smell anyway.

Closing his eyes, he pulled a breath into his lungs and sought out the scent that was uniquely hers. It wasn’t as strong as he would have liked, but there was enough of it to follow down the hall and to her door where it was much more apparent. Raising a hand to knock, he glanced to either side before tapping lightly on the door. Once he was given the cue to enter, he pushed opened the door, the shadows falling away from him the second he was safely inside. “So tell me what has you upset.”

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with_hope_again
2008-09-25 07:38 pm UTC (link)

Was she downplaying? Perhaps. Was she completely unsure of how she ought to be feeling? Definitely. Cassandra had always thought that if she ever saw Jack again that she'd have the simple emotion of hate flowing through her veins. She also thought it would be years down the road and if anything she'd be a much stronger person, much farther removed from the haunting of her past. Neither of those things were the case when it happened though. At first she'd been too surprised by the sight of him in the one place she thought she'd never see him again.

But there he was, like it was nothing. Merely doing his job, checking books in and checking books out. It was that... normalcy to it that had bothered Cassandra the most. A personal nightmare that appeared to be just the opposite.

And then there had been his words. She wished she could have plugged her ears and ignored it all. But she hadn't and she couldn't. While there was a part of her that only wanted to hate him forever there was another part of her that wanted to know why more. Why was proving to be more convoluted though. Had he really been trying to do right for her? That just couldn't... it didn't mesh with her memories of her life. Made her question far too many things and ultimately reminded her of the blame that went hand in hand with her past. If she'd been smarter about it all, if she'd... just done something differently and now if she had just seen what he said he was trying to do... maybe it would have all been better. It was all rather silly considering the past was the past and couldn't be undone she was just tired of it effecting the future so much.

Cassandra had holed herself up in her room after she'd made her escape from the library. Closing the window shut tight and triple checking that her door was locked. She'd subsisted off the stash of food she always kept in her room but it was getting low and she knew that sitting on her bed for 24 straight hours was a bit ridiculous, she just couldn't get herself to step outside just yet. It was almost funny how she trapped herself as much as Jack had trapped her all those years. Well perhas ironic... not funny.

Max was on his way over and in preparation she'd managed to throw away the ziplock back that had held some banana brea and somewhat unrumple her comforter. Her clothes remained the same, soft blue pajama pants paired with a white sweatshirt. The room was a little too warm for that much clothing but she just felt the need to be covered, like it added some invisible layer of protection. Anything to feel safe. At the sound of a knock on the door, Cassandra pushed up from her spot on the bed and unlocked the door, letting him inside. Her mouth had been open to ask him if it had been alright getting over there, aka she hoped he hadn't got into trouble but the look of concern on his face followed promptly by his question stopped her.

She blinked for a moment, clasping her hands together tightly, knuckles standing out white. "It's..." She crosesd back over the room and returned to her spot on the bed, knees drawn up to her chest. "It's complicated. So I'm sorry if it takes a while to get out." She began. "Sit down, please. The bed's fine or the chair if you want." but truthfully she already felt safer with someone else in the room. Well maybe it was because that someone was Max. "I just need a second." her heart was still pounding over the surprise of the knock at the door. She had known he was coming but to say her nerves were on high alert was something of an understatement. "Tell me something about your day." She couldn't help but ask that, something about his voice calmed her.

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smokenmirrors
2008-09-25 10:51 pm UTC (link)

When Max entered her room, he didn't exactly like what he saw. It was still fairly earlier and Cassandra looked as if she was either ready for bed or, his first guess, that she hadn't left her room for quite some time. In fact, he couldn't recall seeing her in between classes at all now that he thought about it. That didn't exactly sit well with him. Then of course there was the frumpy state of her bed and the wastebasket that obviously hadn't been emptied for a while. Add onto all of that the unneeded extra layer she was sporting and his deductive reasoning skills told him that she had been hiding out or at least avoiding going out. Not good.

His face fell as he watched her cross the room and hug her knees after taking a seat. If someone had done something to her, he was going to reach down their throat and rip out their spine. Giving a nod that he understood and that he would be patient with her, even if that was the last thing he really wanted to do, he moved over to the chair and took a seat. She looked spooked and if this had anything to do with her powers, then the last thing he wanted to do was encroach on her personal space. Or if she had been hurt...feeling his fists curl into tight balls, he dismissed that thought and willed himself to calm down.

"My day?" Apparently by needing a minute she meant that it was up to him to carrying on the conversation for a while. Not exactly an easy feat when he was awaiting instruction on which guy he needed to pummel into the ground. Slightly overprotective? Maybe, but the way she seemed to fear the world was enough to have him fired up and ready to go. No one should ever make another person feel so small and helpless.

Willing himself to relax so that he could be of some comfort and offer her some normalcy, he leaned back against the chair and sighed. "Overall it was pretty uneventful. I had breakfast, went to class, had lunch, went to more class and then headed back to my room to finish a paper and do some reading." Reaching up, he scratched at the back of his neck as he tried to figure out what else to say that would help him keep from focusing on the problem at hand. "Oh, I spoke with my mother earlier. I was told to warn you that she and my sister would eventually like to meet the woman who has captivated me during my time here." Ecstatic was the word he believed she had used.

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with_hope_again
2008-09-26 02:16 am UTC (link)

Cassandra could see the tension that pulled his entire frame tight. Her intention hadn't been to cause that sort of distress in him, that reason as much as her confusion was what contributed to her desire to downplay it all. Simply put, she wasn't used to having someone react to things like people she had met at Halcyon did. She had spent years perfecting not being a burden under Jack's watchful eye. To lay all her worries out for others to help her sort through was still... a new thing for her.

Her fingers toyed with a few wayward bits of thread that hung down from her sweatshirt sleeve. She watched as he settled down into the seat at her desk, Milo the cat immediately made a figure eight between his legs, rubbing his gray fur along Max's pant legs. Well at least her cat approved of him, that almost brought a smile to her wan features. He didn't want to sit and have normal conversation that Cassandra had requested, that was obvious with just a look at his features. But he humored her and for that Cassandra was grateful. Those few minutes, those simple things that he told her about his day meant a great deal. It reminded her that she was at Halcyon and that she wasn't alone in her room no matter how she had closed herself off from the world for the day. "Your mother wants to meet me?" Cassandra asked with a bit of surprise lighting her eyes. "I hope she likes me." And there was more truth to those words than she cared for.

Her fingers finally dropped the thread that she'd kept such a strong hold on and Cassandra forced her shoulders a little farther up the wall. She tried to let go of the stranglehold she had on her knees but that was a lost cause. Even Milo had stopped trying to crawl into her lap. "Thank you Max. I'll tell you now. I... just needed that second. I've... never really had to talk about any of this, when my sister didn't ask, I wasn't sure if I ever would." She admitted truthfully. It was one thing to hold the thoughts but another to push them into words.

Cassandra settled her chin onto her knees. "I am okay though, no one hurt me." She had to assure him from the start. "I guess I should start at the beginning though. Not much makes sense without that." Bare toes curled into her comforter. "When I was little and my abilities first started... my family was, is, really religious. My mom didn't understand and my dad was gone. She... she was convinced that I had- well that I had a you in me?" She tried for a brief second to smile with that response. "Whatever was wrong with me, she could fix with enough prayer and enough tries to remove whatever Satan had left on my soul. I- I well it didn't work and when I was ten decided that running was better than staying. So I did. It really wasn't a better idea but I don't know if I thought I had any other choice."

Cassandra paused and took a much needed breath though it did little to calm her ragged nerves. "Someone picked me up as I was trying to make it God knows where in the rain. He told me his name was Jack and... I thought he was just going to take me back to my mother or maybe to the town and the police. But, he didn't. I think I wish he had though." Cassandra's eyes darted down to her toes, unable to hold their gaze forward anymore. "He knew who or rather what I was. He needed questions answered and I never could but it didn't stop and other people always wanted to know things and..." Cassandra felt her fingers tighten around the loose thread painfully and she stopped. "I didn't think it ever would so I tried to stop it. I ended up here instead, a scout found me in the hospital which I will always be glad for. And I wish I could have made this story shorter but he's.. he's here and just here. Like it's nothing and I-" She finally looked up and over at Max. "I don't know if I can take that."

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smokenmirrors
2008-09-26 04:06 pm UTC (link)

When the cat was felt brushing against his legs, he reached down and scratched the animal on the top of the head. It was more of an unconscious effort on his part, but that was probably to be expected considering his thoughts were currently focused on more pressing matters. "And my sister," he said with a nod. "Though I'm not sure which you should worry about more." There was a teasing grin on his lips and he forced out a laugh. "I am sure they will both love you." As long as she was okay with eventually reproducing at some point. His mother entertained the idea of grandchildren far too much for his tastes.

Her sister? Had he known that she had had a sister here? No, it wasn't ringing any bells. Obviously she hadn't been a huge presence in Cassandra's life if she wasn't asking questions. "Take your time." The last thing that he wanted to do was rush her while she was struggling with opening up with him. Though the effort alone on her part meant a great deal to him.

An audible sigh fell past his lips when she assured him that she had been unharmed. The amount of relief he felt was somewhat surprising and only proved to cement his belief that even though he barely knew her, that she was something special for him. A frightening yet intriguing turn of events all at the same time. The rest of her story however, did not sit well with him. Religious fanatics weren't his favorite people anyway and how anyone could treat their own child like a leper? Well, he just couldn't understand.

As her story continued, he found his fists balling once again. "He used you." It came out a bit more harshly than the had intended but it was what it was in the end. Wait, she had tried to stop it and was in the hospital? His eyes went wide and he couldn't fight back the feeling to destroy whoever had pushed her to such extremes. Suddenly the thought of ripping the man's spine out seemed tame compared to what he was now considering.

Pushing to his feet, he crossed the space between them and took a careful seat next to her. Reaching out, he pulled her into his arms and pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head. "I won't let anything happen to you," he promised. "Tell me who he is and I'll make sure of that."

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with_hope_again
2008-09-27 01:46 am UTC (link)

It was a struggle, it had surprised her almost how much. Years of bottled up memories and hurts all forced to come out at once, in one attempt at a succinct telling. The pieces had to be told though, coming out to fit like a puzzle to explain how it had all come to pass, one not happening without the other. But none of it truly made sense, that was something Cassandra had long ago accepted.

"I-" Cassandra's mouth opened and closed. Words struggled to make it past the confusing thoughts that had taken control of her mind. "I guess he did. I-I know that it could have been worse. He didn't hurt me, not on purpose." Why she felt the need to try and lessen Jack's action she couldn't rightly say. Mostly though, it just hurt something in her to say it all, to spell it all out so clear. She'd been the one foolish enough to walk into the situation, her mother had loved her for all her misguided ways. Maybe if she'd have stayed there she would have wound up at Halcyon faster, maybe a scout would have found her. But wishing for things like that was pointless and Cassandra knew that.

In an unconscious gesture, Cassandra wrapped the sleeves of her sweatshirt tighter around her wrists as she watched his eyes widen. She didn't move a muscle as he stood up from his seat and cross the short space between them. Her body held stalk still as the mattress shifted with the addition of another person. The embrace wasn't resisted though it took a moment for a pent up sigh to escape her lungs letting her body finally relax into the circle of his arms. It was more than she could have hoped for to have that one small moment where she felt like nothing could ever happen to her so long as she stayed right where she was.

The moment couldn't last forever and she knew it, there was a reality to the situation. "He... He said he's not going to take me away from here." She spoke into the soft fabric of his shirt, letting it muffle her words. "I-If that's true." Cassandra couldn't help but add. There had been too many words spoken by Jack for her to know what to believe anymore. "I don't know what's the truth though. He said he's the reason I'm here... like he'd helped me." Her lashes fell and Cassandra squeezed her eyes shut. "W-what if that's true? Can I hate him still?" That was what ate at her, could those thoughts be reconcilable.

She wedged an arm up to her face, using the cuff of her sweatshirt to wipe at her cheeks. "W-what are you going to do?" She had to ask pulling her chin up to better see his face. "I don't even know what he is. I don't... you can't get hurt." It wasn't meant as a slight on his abilities, she simply didn't know any other way to put it. There was just no way she could stand it if he was hurt by any of this.

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smokenmirrors
2008-09-28 04:44 pm UTC (link)

"Don't." The last thing he wanted to hear her say was that somehow she had been the one to bring this upon herself and that the other man was innocent. She was sounding like a victim and he didn't like that one bit. "He used you, don't try to make that sound any less than it really is." The fact that she seemed convinced that it wasn't entirely the other party's fault had his blood boiling. Whoever the guy was, he had done a number on her and needed to pay.

Even though if felt right to have her in his arms, he couldn't ignore the complexity of the situation. They weren't down by the waterfall anymore and this wasn't a time to be carefree and happy. His spine went stiff when she spoke and he unconsciously held her tighter. "He won't," he said with a determination in his voice. "Regardless of his plans, I won't allow him take you away." It was becoming quite clear that Max was going to have to have a word with this guy and then possibly put a call into some family friends.

"Does it matter if he tried to help you in the end? That doesn't make up for what he did to you in the beginning." While Max wasn't exactly a big condoner of holding grudges, he was willing to make an exception in this case. Especially since he had a feeling that this guy was probably lying through his teeth as a means to get to her. Too bad that just wasn't going to happen.

When she shifted to look up at him, he reached out and cupped her cheek with his palm. "I won't," he replied as he brushed the pad of his thumb over her soft skin. "For now, I'll just have a few words with him. You just need to give me his name." A few words while he looked into what exactly he was going up against and then he could make his move. Funny, all these years he had been trying to escape the path his father had laid before him and right now, he had a feeling that his father would have been quite proud.

"I promise that I will take care of this...take care of you. Okay?" Any other details and well, she didn't really need to know.

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with_hope_again
2008-09-30 02:00 am UTC (link)

Cassandra could be entirely comfortable with herself, she was fine with the things she liked and who she was now that she was at Halcyon. But the years before that represented one long string of insecurity. She tried to move past it and for the most part she was successful... what she hadn't been prepared for though was the sudden onslaught of what seeing Jack again did to her. Cassandra's mouth shut with a nearly audible sound. "I-" she started and failed. "I know he did. There's... I know there's no real excuse for that." She took in a deep breath reminding herself of the truth of that statement.

The vehemence behind Max's words surprised Cassandra. There wasn't a doubt in her that he meant exactly what he said, that no matter what Jack might have thought to do, he wasn't going to take her anywhere. Whether he would be able to do that if push came to shove... wasn't what mattered in the moment. Not at all. Cassandra's eyes widened slightly as she stared up at him. "You... you won't let him will you," she repeated back slowly, letting the words soak into her. They wrapped right around her in a feeling of safety that logically she knew she should question more than she was capable of. It was the kind of safety she should have felt from her family all those years ago but had lost all too quickly.

Her lower lip tugged tightly between her teeth as she contemplated his words. "I... I think it just makes me angry." She finally admitted. "Angry that he could say all that to confuse me, that he knows I don't... that I don't want to hate or feel that suspicion towards people and it makes me angry that I let his words have that effect on me." She finally admitted with a slight drop of her chin. "I just... It doesn't matter." That Cassandra could finally see through all the confusion that his words created in her mind. It didn't change any of what had happened before.

She was silent for a moment as she felt the swipe of his finger over her cheek. The touch was always cherished. She'd feared that as unstable as she was at the moment that, she wouldn't be able to control anything but she was surprisingly successful. "Jack. That's all I ever knew him by. He's... in the library." Cassandra finally divulged the information that he'd been seeking from the start. "Just..." Cassandra started and stopped before snaking her arms around his middle and tightening her hold on his form. "Thank you Max." She said simply. "For as many times as I wished that I was stronger to stop it all I wished that there was someone who could help me just the same."

Her arms didn't release him yet, "do you have to go?"

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smokenmirrors
2008-10-01 10:04 pm UTC (link)

As much as it pained him to witness the struggle, he had to remind himself that this was natural and something that she had to go through in order to come out stronger in the end. If she missed the step of overcoming, then she would never truly be able to heal. He just had to keep that in mind while he forced his rage back down. There would be time to deal with those emotions later.

"Jack," he repeated with a nod. A Jack in the library wasn't ringing any bells but they would be soon, he would see to that. What little information she was able to give him was burned into brain and stored for later use. He would definitely be making a few calls and sending some emails before he paid this "Jack" a visit. Had to be prepared and all that after all. Something else that his father had tried to instill in him over the years.

As Cassandra thanked him, he looked down at her with a slight smile tugging at one corner of his mouth. "You're welcome." Dropping his hand from her cheek, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tighter against his chest. "Thank you for allowing me to be that person." If she hadn't, he probably would have taken care of matters all the same, but it felt good to have her trust and faith. It meant a lot to him.

"No," he answered as he settled back against the headboard. "I can stay as long as you'd like." Slowly, he reached up and ran a hand over her silken hair, the strands moving through his fingers like water. "Just say the word."

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with_hope_again
2008-10-03 12:46 am UTC (link)

Was that what it all was? Healing? Working through all of it? It probably was but it wasn't anything that Cassandra ever wanted to go through again. No thanks. If anything every made her feel this insecure or foolish again it would be too soon. Maybe some day down the road it would be easier to look back on it all as some kind of growing experience.

"He's... well I guess he's no taller than I am." Shorter actual but she had grown like a weed for too many years, she hadn't even really noticed that she was actually taller than him now. "Dark hair.. he's the librarian I guess." Cassandra gave as much explanation of him as she could. Well could without having to think too deeply on him. the very last thing she wanted was even more of him etched into her mind at the moment. She worried though, worried about the look that was on his face as she gave the description. She'd never... well that wasn't a look she was used to... he would be alright though. He had to be.

It was a heady feeling that his arms wrapped so tightly around her brought. Made that worry for what could come in the future melt away. She couldn't help but want to hold onto that for as long as she could. "I don't know how anyone could not let you be," Cassandra said with complete sincerity as her fingers curled into his shirt. She knew that she should ease away, before anything happened but her body no made no move. Instead it seemed to think she needed the closeness more than anything else. Maybe it was right.

Her hips shifted, wiggling to get the comforter that was beneath her settled. "Do I need to know a special word? Or does please work?" She asked angling her chin up slightly to look at him, the hint of a smile just starting to work over her features. "Whenever you need to go though... unless it's for food then you have to bring me back some." She had to add hoping her stomach wouldn't punctuate the point with a grumble, not when she was settled in so cozy next to him.

Though if she'd stay awake that long was a whole other story.

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smokenmirrors
2008-10-03 01:45 pm UTC (link)

The librarian? Did this school not do background checks or something? Making sure that every detail she gave him was committed to memory, he added a few mental notes of his own before allowing his focus to shift back to her. It was rather difficult not to focus on her what with the soft scent of her hair and those gorgeous eyes of hers.

As her hips wiggled, he had to think of chaste things but ended up settling on biting down on his tongue instead. He hadn't lied when he had told her that he was in it for the long run, but that didn't mean that it wasn't going to be torture in the mean time. It really was fortunate that he wasn't the kind of guy who was ruled completely by his crotch. "Please works just fine," he smirked as he ducked his head and stole a quick kiss from her lips.

"All right." His hand worked over her hair as she snuggled up against him, his own back settling against the bed as he just stared off across the room. He couldn't help but wonder as her breathing became shallow just how long it had been since she had slept but at the moment it didn't matter. All that did was that he was able to provide her enough comfort to catch up on whatever hours she had missed. Once he was sure she was out, he adjusted them enough so that he could could lay back and settle in for the night.

Hopefully she wouldn't mind waking up with him there.

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