Final Fantasy VII 100 Word Challenge

Title: Walked In On
Author: jlsigman
Rating: R
Team: Avalanche
Word count: 100

( Walked In On )

Ah, the fine art of the pick-up line! Avalanche has mastered it for the win with 40 points - would you like to go badck to their place and see the trophy? The Turks aren't so bad at the pick-up themselves with 30 points - you know, Reno's not a genie, but he can make your dreams come true. Even SOLDIER managed to score 20 points with their lines - but coming in third place, they know they don't have a chance with you, but they just wanted to hear an angel talk.

This week's prompt is #117 - Masturbation

Oh yes, from the pick-up to the going home alone...show us some of that alone time.

Is Rufus having a little "me-time" in his office? Is Sephiroth taking care of what those dreams left behind? Is Tifa shopping for a new toy? Is Yuffie embarrassed when it comes to discussing it? Who uses gadgets, who uses spit, who likes to be watched? Does Rude prefer to let Reno give him a hand?

Whatever the setting, who ever the individual...get them off in just 100 words.

Do I even need to remind anyone that if your drabble isn't worksafe put it behind a cut?

Title: Innuendo, Serendipity's Glib Companion
Pairing/Characters:  Cloud/Tifa
Team: SOLDIER
Rating:  PG-13
Word Count: 100
Author's Note:  Inspired by a single sentence ficlet by freakyhobbins.  Remember, she's the clever one.

Sitting at the bar, Cloud internally rehearsed what he planned to say to Tifa.  The subject of their relationship was likely to be a touchy one, thanks to what Yuffie succinctly termed his ‘Geostigma Stupidity’.  Finesse was required.  Unfortunately, he’d never been a smooth-talker, not even when he’d thought he was Zack.

He was going to be sleeping alone for months.

Or so he thought, until closing time revealed that Tifa had plans of her own.

“Give me something hard,” she breathed in his ear, and he all but choked on a combination of eagerness, surprise, and whiskey.

Title: Yes Sir Ma'am Sir
Pairing/Characters: Sephiroth, Cloud, Zack/Aeris
Team: Avalanche
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 100
Author's Note: I had a little too much fun with these. ^_^;;; This one is a bit AU.

( By the time her boys were settled... )






Title: You Either Got It Or You Don't
Pairing/Characters: Reno, Rude, Rufus/OC
Team: Avalanche
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 100

( This party sucks. )





Title: Mechanically Inclined
Pairing/Characters: Cid/Vincent
Team: Avalanche
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 100

( Though he was no slouch... )





Title: ...*And* I'm Happy To See You
Pairing/Characters: Zack/Cloud
Team: Avalanche
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 100

( Cloud shifted his bag of groceries... )

Title: Mama’s Boys
Challenge: Pick-up Lines
Characters: Cloud & SHM
Team: SOLDIER
Word count: 100
 


Cloud scowled as the two leather-clad bikers closed in on him. His mind whirled.

Were these guys at that bar the other night?

The larger of the two veered his bike right up next to Cloud’s, almost close enough to touch.

Whoa, not bad! Big, very big – that’s definitely not padding, either!

In a rough and angry voice, the strange biker growled, “Where’s Mother?”

Cloud blinked. “What the –?”

The other stranger crowded his bike on the opposite side. “We know you hid her, brother.”

Oooh, get OUTTA here, Strife! With lines like that, these guys are WAY too kinky!

Title: ...
Characters: Reno, Tifa, Rude
Team: Turks
Rating: PG
Word Count: 100.
Author's Notes: ^_^

The redhead was blathering on for almost three quarters of an hour - nonstop. His partner just sat, sipping his drink with an occasional shift in his seat.

Reno's babbling became a background noise, an unwanted one albeit, but still something in the background. Sadly for Rude, it wasn't the same.

"Then, you ask 'em if they's an angel and if it hurt when they fell from Heaven."

"..."

"You's never gonna get chicks with that pick up line!"

"..."

"Don't give me that!"

"Reno, shut up." Rude said.

Tifa wandered over with another drink in her hand. "Best words I've heard all night."


Title: Gimp Mask?
Characters: Zack, Sephiroth
Team: Turks
Rating: PG at least
Word Count: 100.
Author's Notes: got the line from 229 Things Sephiroth Never Thought He'd Say On The Phone

"No, I don't want a gimp mask, even if they're having a two for one sale."

He hoped for all things Holy that this was a joke. He never understood why he would be the one to get random phone calls with the oddest topics; in all of ShinRa tower he couldn't be the only one, right?

Why did Zack call and ask him or tell him the weird things that was happening to him? It did however make him thankful that he wasn't actually there, sometimes.

"Zack, that wasn't a pick up line was it?" Sephiroth asked, ready to disconnect.


Title: Sixty Ninth Floor
Characters: Sephiroth, Zack and Reno (sorta)
Team: Turks
Rating: PG
Word Count: 100.
Author's Notes: um, yes.

"So, Reno is dangling out a sixty ninth floor window. Yes, yes, I caught the significance of the floor number."

The General twirled his pen, closed his eyes. He even bit his lip to stop from laughing.

"Get Reno back in the building. I don't care how long... Or how long you two plotted..."

Sephiroth didn't know why he bothered answering his phone anymore - wait, he did. His voice mail would be flooded.

"Zack. Worst. Pick up line. Ever. No, I'm not kidding. The idea of Reno dangling out of the sixty ninth floor does nothing for me. No. Really."

You would think that Genesis or Sephiroth would have booked the library for a long leisurely read. You would think, but you'd be wrong. The Turks, in a surprising takeover, grabbed 20 points worth of reading material for the win last week. Now, if only Reno would stop doodling in the reference books.

This week's prompt is #116 - Pick-up Lines

Zack is out on the town. He sees a hottie in the corner of a bar. What does he say to her/him? Is Aerith really an angel from heaven? Is Tifa tired of hearing the same old cliched lines being used at the Seventh Heaven? Is Vincent teaching some of the good old pick-ups to Cloud? Are really there magic words that get anyone back to Reno's apartment? Does Hojo use science related lines to get all the hotties?

So, give us your worst, or your best, pick-up line in just 100 words.

Title: Records Retention 1 & 2
Characters: President Shinra & The Librarian
Team: Turks
Challenge: Library
Word Count: 100 x 2

“President Shinra, I don’t think you quite comprehend the importance of a records retention policy.”

“I don’t think you understand the importance of my morning tea.”

“Sir, I’ve studied under the company’s records manager and it’s imperative that we discard of old records. Not only are we running out of space, but you don’t want your enemies to undercover something you don’t want them to see when in fact you should have thrown it out ages ago.”

“Are you suggesting I have enemies?”

“I only work in the basement library, I don’t live there. Surely anyone can surmise as much.”

___

The Librarian sighed at the remnant of the basement library. Research notes and reports that should have been discarded years ago littered the floor.

“I told him about implementing a records retention policy.”

When he smelled burning, the Librarian ran to the safe to rescue the backup copies of the records. Fleeing the mansion on the outskirts of Nibelheim, he was determined to preserve the information.

Fumbling in his pocket, he located a hastily scribbled phone number.

Taking out his cell phone, he dialed. “Hello, Rufus? Oh, hello Tseng. May I speak to Rufus, please? I have what he wants.”

Who would have thought that Avalanche would have a bigger kink for leather than SOLDIER? They take away the trophy this week for 20 points. The Turks only have leather shoes and leather belts to obsess over. We can only speculate what SOLDIER has been up to this week.

This week's prompt is #115 - Library

All about the library this week.

Is Genesis sneaking into the library after hours to read in peace and quiet? What did Sephiroth read in the library that pushed him over the edge? Is Marlene getting her first library card? Has Reno been kicked out of the library for looking at inappropriate material on the internet? Is Hojo doing a little late night research? Does Tseng secretly rip artwork out of the books to decorate his gym room locker? Does Zack still have an outstanding library fine for a book that he never returned?

Go to the library, reading library books...make it all about the library in just 100 words.

Title: A Study in Contrasts
Pairing/Characters: Cid/Vincent
Team: Avalanche
Rating: PG-13, sexual themes
Word Count: 100
Author's Note: *perv perv perv*

( Cid. Are you...? )

Title: Bitter Over Sweet
Pairing/Characters: Rude/Tifa
Team: Avalanche
Rating: R, sexual themes
Word Count: 100

( Tifa leaned back with a sigh... )

Urban legends - every society has them. Last week, Avalanche was their own urban legend with 20 points and the trophy. SOLDIER managed to deal with some of the legendary monsters that the urban environment encounters for 10 points. The Turks spend a bit of time dealing with the scientist and therefore don't believe in all that stuff - the lab is stranger than urban fiction.

This week's prompt (straight from raisedbymoogles is #114 - Leather

What is it about the smell of leather? Hell, forget the smell and focus on the feel!

Does Cid take fastidious care of his leather boots? Does Genesis love the feel of his leather gloves? Is Zack attracted to black leather? Does Tifa love to hunker down in Cloud's leather desk chair? Does Sephiroth just look good in leather? What about the Triplets - leather fetish or Sephiroth remnant hand-me-down?

And just for some inspiration:



So, whether it is dressing in it, feeling it, smelling it...well, you get the idea...leather it out in just 100 words.

Title: A Plethora of Pushpins
Pairing/Characters: The Silver Angels, Midgar's premier Sephiroth fanclub
Team: Avalanche
Rating: G
Word Count: 100

The Weekly Gaia News's article claimed that Sephiroth had been sighted flipping burgers in Mideel; a website claimed he'd been kidnapped by Wutaians as a love slave for their princess. Val frowned, unconvinced, but gamely stuck two pushpins in the appropriate places on her giant wall map. From the floor, Jeanne silently passed up another printout: a grainy photo of a snow-veiled, long-haired ghost.

Val stabbed the Northern Continent through the heart with another pushpin, then stepped back to count them all. "Let's face it," she told Jeanne. "If even half these reports are true, Sephiroth has a hundred clones."






Title: The Healer
Pairing/Characters: Aeris, two OCs
Team: Avalanche
Rating: G
Word Count: 100

Hope is rare in the slums. For the young mother soft-footing it up to a quiet house in the early morning hours, her toddler clutched in her arms, hope is a painful thing, clawing at her throat and heart.

"Please," she whispers to the girl at the door. "I've heard the rumors- everyone has- but I wouldn't ask for myself. My baby's so sick, and nothing's helped..."

"Come inside," Aeris tells her, and ushers woman and ill child past her; as she closes the door, she looks out into the garden, green eyes sad and worried and much too old.

Title: The Wrong Car
Challenge: Urban Legends
Characters: Angeal and Genesis
Team: SOLDIER
Word count: 100
A/N: He never knew what hit him.



“This is kinky, even for you.”

Genesis laughed brightly. “Stolen car, Midgar Point, I don’t see what’s so kinky about it.”

Angeal pinned his lover to the plush leather seat. “It’s Lazard’s car.”

“I couldn’t resist! I –” Genesis fell silent, listening. “Do you hear scratching?”

Angeal nodded, moving toward the driver’s seat.

“No, I’ll get it,” Genesis said with a grin, opening his door and vanishing into the night.

Brief panicked screams cut through the stillness.

“That was easy,” Genesis murmured as he slid back into his seat, twirling a metal hook around one finger. “Now, where were we?”

Wow! The first lines prompt was one of the best challenges we have had in a while. We may need to reprise that one in a future challenge.

As for who took the trophy last week, well the SOLDIER racked up 110 points for first place. The Turks gave them a run for their money though, gathering 90 points for their team. Avalanche lagged behind quite a bit, but fought the good fight with 30 points.

This week's prompt is #113 - Urban Legends

Is a killer with a hook for a hand waiting for his next victim and watching Genesis and his date make out? Is Yuffie babysitting Marlene and Denzel when she gets a call from somewhere inside the house? Has Cloud just had a run-in with a vanishing hitchhiker? Are there really alligators in the Midgar sewer system or is that just Deepground?

More urban legends can be found at Snopes.

Whatever the urban legend, give it a Final Fantasy VII twist in just 100 words!

Title: Roving
Characters: Vincent
Team: Turks
Word Count: 100
Note: "The Coral Island" by R.M. Ballantyne.

Roving has always been, and still is, my ruling passion, the joy of my heart, the very sunshine of my existence.

There is freedom in not being tied down. I go where I please and without being too committed, I am able to go where I am needed.

Relationships complicate things.

Yet, I still find myself drawn to them.

When I seek the solitude, I am never truly alone. It is in my wandering when I uncover warmth within the depths of my soul. If I stop in one place too long I lose touch and I need to reconnect.

I am fortunate that there are people who understand - Even if they did force me to buy a cell phone.

I apologize for the multiple entries (as opposed to posting in one batch); I didn't know Zack was going to camp out in my brain.


Title:  Intelligent Design
Characters/Pairings: Hojo
Team: SOLDIER
Word Count: 110
Author's Notes: First line from Shadows of Existence.  "Earth" has been changed to "Gaia".

Life has existed on Gaia for over three billion years.

In that time, one-celled organisms that had their start in the primordial ooze expanded, became more complex, and colonized the oceans from the shallows to the depths. In time, some species began to take advantage of the terrestrial habitats. Over millions of years, creeping amphibians would eventually become warm blooded and evolve into mammals, and certain primate lines would show very interesting developments indeed. And so now here we are, the human species, viewing ourselves as the pinnacle of evolution.

But I have found a way to improve even our own kind. Using material that had a very different origin.

Title: The Chosen Sacrifice
Characters/Pairings: Zack, Genesis, Angeal
Team: SOLDIER
Rating: PG, I guess?
Word Count: 110
Author's Notes: First line from the short story "The Chosen Maiden" by Raul Reyes.  "Stephanie" has been changed to "Zack."

“But I don't want to be a virgin!” Zack cried.

“I can help you with that.”

“Gen, be quiet. Puppy, the play is The Chosen Sacrifice and you're just the....”

“Perfect example of wide-eyed innocence ready to be deflowered?”

“Gen, shut up. Zack, I'm sorry, but the casting is done.” Angeal said.

“I'm gonna be teased about this for the rest of my life,” Zack grumbled.

“Genesis, step away from the door and let go of Zack, he's scheduled for a costume fitting.”

“C...costume fitting?” Zack spied the Third Class coming in with an armload of material. “Oh Gaia, it's purple!”

 

Title: Death
Characters/Pairings: Zack
Team: SOLDIER
Word Count: 108
Author's Notes: First line from On a Pale Horse.  Also, the Crisis Core guide is love; the materia description is taken from there.

“Death,” the proprietor said clearly, showing the stone.

“Uh....death?”, Zack asked, warily eying the green materia.

The woman nodded. “Once equipped, it enables magic that will defeat your enemies with a single blow. If you land a successful hit, well, you won't have to worry about that monster anymore. And you can fuse it with Cure to obtain Curaga. Or with any power attack or ATK Up to obtain Death Blade, a very useful sword skill for any SOLDIER. It's quite the rarity; the traveler who brought it in for trade said he stole it from a Pumpkin.”

“I'll take it,” Zack said eagerly.

 

Title: By the Sea
Characters/Pairings: Zack
Team: SOLDIER
Word Count: 106
Author's Notes: First line from Sea Change

 

Suppose the oceans dried up tomorrow.

I mean, yeah, that would suck. All of those sea creatures wouldn't have a home. And that would mean no more sushi, and man, I love sushi, especially amaebi, and all the people who work in the sushi bars and seafood restaurants and fish markets would be out of a job. And since the oceans are such an essential part of the planet's overall biological and meteorological systems (see, I can pay attention in class), without them Gaia would be just be a lifeless hunk of rock.

But, I wouldn't be fighting sea worms with a friggin' beach umbrella, either.

 

Title: The Warning
Characters: Sephiroth
Team: Turks
Rating: G
Word Count: 100
Challenge: First Lines
Author's Notes: The book is Phantoms, by Dean Koontz
( The scream )


Title: Abducted
Characters: Tifa, Vincent
Team: Turks
Rating: G
Author's Notes: The Snow Queen, by Mercedes Lackey for this one. I changed the name and the gender of the speaker on my line.
( Fairy Godmother? )


Title: Catfight
Characters: Scarlet
Team: Turks
Rating: G
Author's Notes: The House On Olive Street, by Robyn Carr. Only the name was changed.
( Scarlet sensed something )


Title: Not a Princess
Characters: Hojo
Team: Turks
Rating: G
Author's Notes: The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty by A.N. Roquelaure. Changed the word Prince to Scientist.
( The Scientist )


Title: Magick
Characters: Aeris
Team: Turks
Rating: G
Author's Notes: The first line of the series introduction in Practical Candleburning Rituals by Raymond Buckland. (the series intro is by Carl Weschcke)
( To some people... )

Title: Overload
Characters: Reeve
Team: Turks
Rating: G
Author's Notes: The Thief of Always by Clive Barker. Changed the name.
( The great gray beast )

Title: Primroses
Characters/Pairings: Aerith
Team: SOLDIER
Word Count: 104.
Author's Notes:  Love this challenge idea!  First line is from Watership Down.

The primroses were over.

The fluted gold and white lilies bloomed throughout the year, even surviving the mild winter beneath the insulating Plates. The primroses, however, had a definite growing season. They were the only flowers in the old church that withered and died every year. As spring warmed into summer, Aerith lovingly harvested the small seeds for the next year's planting, the leaves for tea, and the young flowers for wine. It was part of marking the seasons, of keeping time with the Planet, of listening to the whispers in the Lifestream.

Of counting the years since she had last heard Zack's voice.