What's the Joke (Harley/Eddie/Jonathan)
Harley twirled one of her blond pigtails around her finger as she looked at the buildings and streets around her. The area was unfamiliar to her, but she hadn’t been everywhere in Gotham, so that fact was easily dismissed. She worried at her lip before shrugging, pushing off so that she was skating down the street, humming as she sucked on the bright red lollipop in her mouth.
She was heading towards the Asylum, using that as a measure of where the shelter was, most familiar with that route home. She gave a little twirl as she skated, ignoring the distractions around her, and thus ignoring the fact this wasn’t her city.
-- Eddie was feeling cooped up inside of Arkham, like a bird trapped in a cage, and though he was still recovering from his gun fight, that didn't make the prospect of going stir crazy any less. He just couldn't stay in one place for too long, but it hurt to get up and move around.
Willing to take the pain, Eddie hobbled out of the asylum, needing to get outside if only for a moment, to clear his head and get it to stop nagging him about being indoors. He pushed through the doors to the asylum, crossing the threshold, standing in the shadows for a moment in the shade from the overhang if the porch, before hearing a noise he hadn't heard in quite a long time.
It sounded like roller skates on the pavement. He knew that sound, but it was probably just his crazy mind spinning out of control from not being properly worked and wound, so he dismissed the sound. He wasn't too worried about anyone skating if they really were, children skated all the time and god knew how many were in this city. He just sighed and stood there, hating everything in that moment, in pain and still irritated.
What else could go wrong today?
--
Harley squealed as she hit a rock, pinwheeling her arms, trying to regain her balance, that failing, she threw herself forward into a handspring...and promptly smacked into Edward, sending them both crashing to the ground. She held her forehead for a moment, before looking down at the man she had ran into and giving another squeal, hugging him tight enough to cut off his circulation. “Eddie! They let ya out!”
--
It had taken him by complete surprise, the squeal and the fall, which sent pain up the side of his leg, looking up at the girl that had pretty much tackled him, before realizing who she was. His eyes narrowed at her and he almost shoved her off of him before feeling her arms slide around him like a vice grip of death.
"Harley....yeah.." Eddie replied, before using his hands to pry her arms from around him, breathing out softly. He glared at her, before looking her over as she was basically sitting on him, not remembering her looking so good. Damn.
He cleared his throat and looked up at her, offering a playful grin, "So good to see you. We should go tell Jonathan. I'm sure he'll be just as thrilled to see you as I am." He said, but that was a lie. Jonathan was never really excited to see anyone.
--
“They let Professor Crane out too?!” She tilted her head in though, absently shifting on him. “Huh, they’re gettin’ worse and worse,” she mused, not noticing that she was still straddling the criminal beneath her.
--
Eddie nodded, grinning at her, "He runs this place, sweetie, he walks around a free man." He replied, letting her sit on him. Oh this day was getting better and better.
"Are you going to sit there like a stump or do you want to go inside? As much as I’d like for you to keep sitting on me like that, this is a respectable place. Nobody says we can't resume this charade inside, however." He said with a smirk, totally hitting on her. She was hot and not related to him, who was going to care?
He did know, however, that they needed to get off of the street before people started wondering why they were in such a promising position outside if the asylum.
--
She tilted her head for a moment, before promptly smacking his chest and climbing off of him. “Not nice, Eddie, a girl has standards, ya know,” she said, giving him a look that was eerily like his daughter’s.
--
Eddie only laughed at her, shrugging his shoulders before sighing softly, "So you have standards now?" He smirked, before getting up slowly when she was off of him, using his crutches to stand up.
He looked at Harley, making a face at the look she was giving him, finding it too familiar. "Come on freak show, lets go find Spooky." He said, turning around to go back into the asylum, now on a mission.
--
“I’ve always had standards, thank you,” she said, sniffing, picking a piece of lint front her shirt before skating after him. “And I’m not a freak show, ya riddle obsessed little...” She cut off, distracted by the difference in this Arkham to their own. “Wow, Spooky’s really done a number on this place...he even re-planted Ivy’s gardens that Doctor A keeps ripping out,” she said, pausing to sniff a rose.
--
He nodded at her, just amused by the way she was so opinionated, however that accent was starting to get to him. He knew there was some duct tape around the asylum somewhere and a room he could throw her in if she got too annoying, but he would save that for later.
"Have you always had standards?" Eddie asked her, teasing her mostly, "When did that start? As far as I can recall you pick real winners to hang out with." He said mostly speaking about Jack, not himself and Jonathan.
He reached out and grabbed one of her hands, after throwing one of his crutches onto the floor for later, dragging her to Jonathan's office. "Here we are!"
--
“Of course I have,” she said, sticking her tongue out at him, before yelping as she was dragged into the office, tripping and falling against him again.
--
“Take the skates off, Harleen,” Jonathan called without even looking up from his book.
--
Her falling onto him was starting to get a little old, but he slung an arm around her to keep her standing on her skates so she wouldn't pull him down again. He wasn't sure he could get up again without busting a stitch.
He dragged Harley into the office and guided her to a seat in front of Jonathan's desk where she could sit to remove her skates.
"I like the skates. Just the right amount of childish."
--
Jonathan raised his head, staring intently at Edward without comment, trying to pry the man’s skull open and peer inside.
--
“It’s not childish, it’s exercise,” Harley protested, pulling off the skates and setting them on Jonathan’s desk, wiggling her painted toenails now that they were free of the boots before looking between the men. “Uh, somethin’ I said?”
--
Eddie caught Jonathan's glance and arched his eyebrows at the other man, almost innocently, wondering what he said to earn a look like that from the other man. Oh well.
"Skates are childish, you don't see grown ups skating. You see children skating." He explained, not caring what Jonathan was picking up on.
"Now that we're all here, we should do something fun!"
--
“I see adults skatin; all the time!” Harley protested, leaning back in her chair. She then yelped, loudly as Jonathan’s foot lashed out, knocking it to the floor.
--
“Your legs should have stayed on the ground,” he said, smirking. It was a familiar argument that the pair had had many a time in the Arkham cafeteria and rec rooms. “Maybe now you’ll remember how to sit properly.
--
Eddie laughed as Harley spilled to the floor, and sighed softly, remembering the days before they all arrived here. Oh what good times. He was glad to see her, however, and now the sight around here would be quite excellent.
Eddie moved further into the room, leaning mostly on his crutch, settling down in a seat near Jonathan, his usual spot, watching Harley. God he'd missed her, and she hadn't changed much at all, which was a bonus.
--
“So what happened ta ya?” Harley asked as she got up and kicked Jonathan in the shin, before righting the chair and sitting down in it, looking at Edward. “Ya get hit by a bus or somethin’?”
--
Eddie rolled his eyes at her, "Does it look like I got hit by a bus?" He asked her, annoyed by the question. He had forgotten how annoying she could be and how dumb he thought she was too. She had great qualities, and she was super hot, but Eddie had forgotten a few things in the time they'd been apart.
Oh well, he could get over that.
"I was shot, dummy." He said, shaking his head at her.
--
“Ooo...who’ja piss off this time? Was it Jarvis again, because he doesn’t mean to be so obsessed...or Pam? Because really, Eddie, ya should stop staring at her breasts all the time. Oh! Was it Victor? Or Zsasz...no, wait, he usually poses people when he kills them, uh...Rat guy..”
--
“Rat Catcher,” Jonathan said absently, having already returned to his work.
--
"A scientist...." He replied, definitely not happy about it, and there was no way that Edward was going to stop looking at anyone's breasts. It just wasn't going to happen like that. He didn't care who knew it.
He glanced over at Jonathan then back at Harley, "So, where are you staying, hottie?" He inquired, meaning if course to say Harley, but his brain said basically what he was thinking. Why he even asked that, he wasn't sure because it wasn't like he had anywhere to offer to let her stay, he was just curious.
--
“Professah Crane shot ya?!” She said, looking between them, shocked. “And ya know where I’m staying, Eddie! At the animal shelter with Pam and Selina!” She titled her hair, grinning. “Did Spooky hit ya in the head too?”
--
Jonathan raised his head from his work again, staring at Edward. While most of the man’s words were going right over Harley’s head, adorable ditz that she was, and the rest being blatantly ignored, the good doctor wasn’t missing it, and getting rather annoyed.
--
Eddie sighed, lifting a hand and putting it over his face in effort to show exasperation, removing his hand from his face after a moment, "No, idiot. He didn't shoot me." He said, knowing that Jonathan probably wanted to from time to time. "You're in a completely different world Harley, there probably isn't an animal shelter here and Pam and Selina aren't here either." He replied, reeling himself back in a little.
He couldn't help hitting on her but Jonathan was sitting right there and of course it was all in good fun, Eddie wouldn't try anything with her. However, if she did come on to him, then it was fair game.
--
“I’m..what?” she asked, confused, her head titling, before she burst into laughing. “Your so silly, Eddie! I can’t be in a different world, you’re here and so is Professah Crane and Arkham!”
--
“It’s true, Harl, you’re in The City, a conglomeration of worlds, including ours.” Jonathan said softly.
--
“Oh...” she said, her face falling.
--
"We're here too, no worries. We can all be trapped here together." Edward said, reaching out a hand, placing it on Jonathan's arm, trying to be affectionate. He knew he was behaving quite badly, but Jonathan was his number one and Eddie wasn't going to let him forget it.
"There are a ton of people here Harley, you have to be careful. The Bat is here and he's not like our bat back home, this one can really hurt you. And we wouldn't want that, would we?"
--
“But I have no where to stay,” she said softly, frowning. “And all my stuff is gone, and the babies...”
--
“You are free to stay with us, Harley,” Jonathan said, reaching out to gently take her hand, giving Edward a warning look at the same time to keep his lover in line. He cared for Harley, but he would not hesitate to kill her if she got in his way.
-- Eddie nodded, finding her staying with them here at the asylum to be a great idea! That way, at least, they could keep her in line.
When Jonathan shot him a look, Eddie rolled his eyes and sat back in his seat, folding his arms over his chest like a child. No fair. It wasn't like anything was ever going to happen so what did Jonathan have to worry about?
Probably a lot.
--
“Okay,” she said, sniffling softly. “Can I have my old office for a room?”
“Of course, you can even have it for an office if you desire, Doctor Quinzel.”
--
Harley squeeled, throwing herself onto Jonathan, squeezing him tight enough that the good doctor started to turn purple.
--
Eddie smiled a little at her happiness, glad she was willing to stay with them here. It was going to be fun having her around, and they could at least update her on what's been going on, who to avoid and whatnot.
If she would even be smart enough to listen and follow their advice.
"So, what should we do first?"
--
“Re-decorate the office!” Harley cried, cheering.
--
“Actually, I wanted to speak with you privately, Edward,” Jonathan said softly.
--
Eddie nodded at Jonathan, glancing over at Harley the next moment. "That's your cue to scram." He said to her, playful of course.
He sat back in his seat and looked at Jonathan expectantly. "What's on your mind?"
--
“I know!” She said, sticking her tongue out before dashing off to go track down her office.
--
Jonathan stood, waiting until Harley had left before gripping Edward by the front of his shirt, slamming their mouths together hard, a hand burying itself in Edwards hair, keeping him there.
--
Eddie groaned at the action of Jonathan slamming their mouths together, lifting his own hand up to let his fingers slide into Jonathan's hair, closing his eyes.
God he loved this man.
--
Jonathan bit and sucked his way to Edward’s neck, before dropping to his knees in front of the man, looking up at him as he pulled of his glasses, setting them aside. Edward was the only man who could ever have the God of Fear kneeling before him. He smirked, leaning in and kissing Edward’s neck again, right over his pulse point, long fingers pushing his jacket from his shoulders.
He then bit down, hard on Edward’s neck, possessively marking him.
--
Eddie shivered, as Jonathan's lips found his neck, tilting his frame to accommodate Jonathan's shift in position, eyes opening for a moment. "Mm, spooky." He breathed out, letting Jonathan push away the jacket he was wearing.
When Jonathan bit his neck, Eddie made a face, but he let Jonathan stake his claim, glad he was. He wouldn't have it any other way.
--
Jonathan smirked, pulling away from Edward’s neck, as he ripped open the man’s shirt, sliding down his body a bit, nails raking red lines down Edward’s chest. He leaned in, latching onto the flesh of Edward’s stomach, sucking softly on it as his fingers gently stroked over the man’s nipples, teasing them.