Who: Sally-Anne Perks. Where: Her living room When: Tuesday night (backdated) What: Trying to understand and failing Rating: Low
After Justin left, Sally found herself slumping into the sofa. She couldn’t believe that he had just come in there and told her that. Had he lost his mind? Sally never really understood why Justin had fancied her in the first place and she had assumed whatever silly emotions he had harbored had faded away once he starting dating Megan. Sally had never expected him to confess that not only that he still had feelings for her, but that they were causing an obvious rift in his new relationship.
Underneath the anger that she obviously felt, Sally was torn by guilt. Megan was going to assume that Sally had done this deliberately to break the two of them up. But she hadn’t. In fact, Sally had been avoiding Justin for weeks now. One because it hurt too much to see him and the other because she didn’t want to cause any trouble. She and Megan might not be friends, but Sally wasn’t spiteful. Only her own family’s actions had ever caused Sally to be truly vindictive. Megan deserved no punishment for being a better partner for Justin than Sally could be.
But when that thought entered her mind, Sally was surprised by the urge to fight back tears. She had never expected to start caring about Justin when they first starting hanging out four months ago. When he wanted to pursue things, to see where things might go, she had rejected him. But what had he expected from her? People don’t change in a day. The notion of dating someone like him…or anyone at all, really…was something she needed to get used to. Sally was a very closed off person. Trusting was a learned skill.
So yes, for a moment Sally had wanted him. But she had also accepted that it had been too late. For her, for them. Once he started dating Megan, she knew she could never pursue those feelings any further. She also knew his relationship with Megan might damage his friendship with Sally irrevocably. And it had. But now he had complicated the other side as well.
What was he going to do? Break up with her? And if he did, was he going to expect something from Sally? Something she couldn’t provide? And even if she could, would she want to? Would she ever be able to explore anything, without constantly thinking about how it would affect Megan? And even if they tried, was there any chance it would actually work? Unlikely, since in the back of his mind, he would be thinking of Megan too.
And that’s when a sob escaped Sally’s lips. She didn’t want this. She never wanted this.