WHO: Diego and Grace Rojas, Finn Solmon WHEN: Evening of July 22 WHERE: Their home SUMMARY: After literally years of thinking about it, Finn asks Diego to adopt him. WARNINGS: :')
In his almost nineteen years of life, Finn had never met his biological father. Given how early Diego had entered his life and his having known Mehdi since birth, he had never particularly felt like he was lacking in that department. Mehdi had always felt like an uncle of sorts, while Diego was his step-father; the two of them, especially when combined with his mother, more than filled the Father Figure void that had been left in his life when his father had skipped town before his mother had even given birth to him. He knew that there were some people who might have wanted to find him, to have questions answered and perhaps bring closure to the abandonment, but that had never been his case. Jack Clarkson had made the decision to leave nineteen years before and in those years he had never tried to re-enter their lives. That seemed like answer enough to Finn.
Still, there had always been one thing that he did want, but had never had the courage to ask for. The thought had first really occurred to him when he went to the hospital to visit his mother and his brand new baby sister. It wasn't until he was there and spied the little label that boasted Molly Rojas that it clicked in his mind that, though they were undoubtedly a family unit and he'd never question that, he wouldn't have the same last name as his sister and any other siblings that came after her. He had been young enough not to realize it as his mother went from Grace Solomon to Grace Rojas after she and Diego were married, but in that moment he couldn't not notice it. The distraction of getting to hold Molly was a good one, but the thought stayed in the back of his mind nonetheless.
As the years went on, the idea of adoption would take hold in Finn every so often, but he never knew how to bring it up. He didn't think that it was a question of Diego being against it; there wasn't a doubt in his mind that his step-father loved him as though he was his own flesh and blood. For himself, Finn knew he had gotten the lottery when it came to step-parentage. The slips of calling him Dad instead of Diego became more frequent and less noticed to him. He was his father in all ways -- except, to be technical, legally.
After Finn turned eighteen, he tried to put it out of his mind. He was an adult and, as far as he knew, that was more or less that. But as the year wound down and he heard the name "Finn William Solomon" spoken by his principal at graduation, it started to fester yet again. This time the distractions around him wouldn't let it go, even when they had to do with his girlfriend having to go to the ER or finding out that his entire support system of people were having the same crazy dreams that he had been having for months. Though he didn't talk about it with anyone, not even his girlfriend who he talked about literally everything else with, the thoughts wouldn't go away.
And that was what had led him to his computer. A simple Google search told him that adult adoption was something that could actually happen and that was enough to steel his resolve. Sitting back in his computer chair, Finn looked up toward the ceiling of his bedroom. It was pretty quiet upstairs, which he wasn't too surprised by. Molly had come down the stairs not long before to give him a hug goodnight (which he would happily accept for as long as she was willing to give them, even if he knew that it was part an attempt at prolonging bedtime), which told him that Hannah was likewise probably in bed. This was a good time, he realized. He could catch them in that bit of time between the littles going to bed and his parents going to bed themselves.
Getting to his feet, Finn paused in front of his mirror to check his hair, as though his parents hadn't seen the rumpled mess that was his hair on most occasions only a short while before when he had been helping clean the kitchen after dinner, and then went upstairs. He hesitated at the top of the stairs just a moment, then barreled forward to the door of their bedroom -- where he again hesitated for a moment before forcing himself to talk. "Hey, Mom. Diego." He paused, shifting his weight in a bit of a fidget as he looked from one to the other. "Can I talk to you guys about something?"
The hesitation in Finn’s body language and in his voice forced Diego to pay attention — after all the years of living together, he thought he was decent at being able to distinguish Finn’s moods and needs, and right then, it seemed like something was wrong. Or, at least, there was something weighing on Finn’s mind.
He set his book aside and glanced at Grace, quickly, before looking back at their teenager. He’d grown up so fast, Diego thought. And he’d missed half of that as it was, but he still thought it’d gone by fast. “Yeah, of course. What’s up?”
Finn and Diego speaking in the bedroom wasn’t something she considered out of the ordinary. There were plenty of times that they had, as a family, piled into the bed to watch movies. And a chat could really take place anywhere. But this seemed late (late for their older boy to venture up the stairs, to wait for his sisters to be asleep) and with everything that had been happening, Grace spit her toothpaste into the sink and came out wiping her lips against the back of her hand.
She caught the anxiety in her son’s frame and the sort of rigid way he stood in the doorway. Something was up. Senses sharp, she narrowed her eyes to consider her son’s frame. He didn’t seem injured. Sparing a glance for Diego, she nodded. “Come and sit down, Finn.”
Now that he had their attention, Finn realized that he had no idea how to really approach the topic. That had been the reason he hadn't brought it up in the years that has passed since the idea first took root, after all. He hadn't been expecting one trip up the stairs to give him sudden inspiration on how to not stumble his way through it all, but there wasn't much he could do about it now.
Finn took a few steps into the room, his arms crossing a bit loosely in front of him. He didn't sit, though, simply because he wasn't sure if he could just yet, not until he'd spoke his piece. Public speaking had never been his strong suit and while talking to his parents wasn't exactly public speaking, it suddenly felt like he was in front of his junior year Oral Communications class, trying to persuade people on some topic he didn't even care about. Of course, this was a topic he did care about and he was delivering it to two of the most important people in his life. And so, he took a breath, looked from his mother to Diego, and then gave it a shot.
"I've been thinking about this for a while," he started, reaching up with one of his hands to scratch at the back of his neck nervously. His gaze dropped, not quite able to look either of his parents in the eye as he started to ramble. "Since, I don't know... I was around thirteen. I never brought it up, because I wasn't sure if it was -- " He hesitated, then shrugged one of his shoulders. "I don't know. I just never did. And I know that I'm technically an adult now and all, so maybe it isn't even my place to want it anymore, but..." His words trailed off as he again paused. It didn't seem like there was any reason to beat around the bush, not when he knew he was probably worrying them both. With that resolve, his gaze rose, landing squarely on Diego. "You've been my dad since I first met you and, um. I was still wondering if maybe you'd want to adopt me."
Grace sat down on the edge of the bed. Solomon had been a shield and rampart for them in the days and months after the other man’s disappearance from their lives. It had encapsulated them so thoroughly that upon making Diego a part of their family, she had wanted to share Rojas with Finn. But she didn’t know if it was an identity he wanted and trusted him to say it when he did.
And now, with tears gleaming in her eyes, she smiled. Now it was time.
As soon as Finn finally got what he wanted to say out, all of Diego’s words flew right out the window. He’d always thought he was good with those - words - but this rendered him speechless in a way he didn’t usually feel. In fact, he was sure he’d only felt that way a few times in his life.
Tears sprang to his eyes immediately. What Finn was asking for was something Diego had wanted, too, only he hadn’t known if he should ask. He entered Finn’s life when he was old enough to know Diego wasn’t his biological father, and he was old enough to have an opinion about who his father was or should be. At the time, it had felt like enough that Finn even approved of Diego marrying Grace at all.
He pushed himself to his feet and closed the remaining space between himself and Finn, gathering the boy up in a tight hug. “I’d be honored, yes.”
As Diego wrapped him in a hug, Finn felt the tension that he hadn't even realized had been building in his body leave him. It hadn't really been that he'd thought Diego would say no. Had that been the case, he wouldn't have felt comfortable enough to even consider it in the first place. Still, if there was one thing that Finn didn't like and struggled with, it was allowing himself to be vulnerable. It had only been in the last couple of years that he'd realized it wasn't necessarily a bad position to be in. Feeling vulnerable just meant that whatever he was doing was important to him -- and this was surely important.
His arms tightened around Diego, completing the embrace and feeling his own eyes fill with tears. He was lucky and he knew it. There were others that didn't have a family unit like he did, Charlie being a prime example. But as he experienced more of Han's past, both in his mind and on the theater screen, it seemed to hit home even more than usual. And so, though his instinct was to make some sort of joke to break the tension that heightened emotions always seemed to bring, he fought it down. "I love you guys," he said instead, looking past Diego's shoulder to his mother.
Grace waited a beat, then walked up behind her boys and wrapped her arms around them both. She held tightly, kissing Finn’s cheek before she spoke. “You are so thoroughly loved, Finn. And you are a part of this family, no matter your last name. But I’m glad we’ll all share the same one.” She loosened her hold on them and kept one hand on each man’s shoulder. Finn had to be brave to ask for this and Diego, as usual, so open.
Grace’s love for them overflowed. “You’re going to like Rojas,” she said.
Although Diego had always felt like a name was just a name, and that what was more important was their actions and how well they loved each other, but the thought of Finn being his -- theirs -- in a tangible way like that got the best of him. He hadn’t realized how it might have made Finn feel, or that he might want to be more included.
“We love you too,” he said, gruffly, his voice thick with emotion. “But you know that. You’ve always -- you’ve always been my family, both of you.”
Finn pulled back from Diego, raising a hand to wipe one of his eyes with the back of it in what he had hoped wasn't an obvious removal of tears, but really was. "Yeah," he agreed, trying not to look too sheepish. "I know. And -- it's like I said. You've been my dad since Mom had us meet." He spared a look at his mother at that, his mouth forming a small smile as he looked at Diego again. "It doesn't have to be written down to be real, but I think -- I guess I figure it'd feel pretty great to have it be written down anyway."
That was an understatement if ever there was one, but Finn had never been very good at expressing his emotions, a fact he assumed both of his parents were well aware of by then. Still, he felt his smile warm as he added, "So... thank you. For being okay with it."
Touching the crystal that had been hanging round her neck for months now, Grace smiled at her boys and sat, letting the moment wash over her. She wanted to remember these two and their unshakeable bond borne not of blood, but of the experiences shared between them. She wanted to remember all of Diego’s generous heart. She wanted to remember Finn’s warmth and his openness.
“We’ll help you with the paperwork. I have the next couple days off. We can go get things started.”
“I don’t even…” Diego was honestly at a loss. He’d never given the idea enough thought that he’d already figured out what papers to get, and how filing would work. He had no idea what to do. It was overwhelming and exciting all at once. “We can sort it out in the morning,” he suggested. “Right now, I’m just -” He exhaled slowly, a bit shaky. “Really happy.” He’d never needed the formality to feel like Finn was his son, but it felt right.
Finn didn't bother trying to stifle his smile. It made him happy as well, but Diego's reaction really put him over the top in that department. Having an answer felt good on its own, especially as it let him move from being anxious about asking and how the request might be taken to relieved and excited. There had been a time not that long ago where Finn hadn't been all too excited about the future and what it might bring, but lately it seemed like everything pointed to good things.
"Cool," Finn replied, reaching up again with his hand to rub the back of the neck bashfully, somehow different than the nervous gesture from before. "We'll figure it out. It'll be -- it'll be awesome." He took a tentative step back toward the door of the bedroom, shrugging one of his shoulders. "I'll let you guys go to bed or whatever. Thanks for -- " His words stopped short and he looked a bit curious, as though trying to decide just what he was thankful for. What wasn't he thankful for at that moment? "Thanks for everything."
The fact that Finn felt the need to thank them for anything at all made Diego’s throat feel a little tight, just as his heart was swelling again. It had always been a no-brainer that he would always be there for Finn, no matter what. He’d never questioned it, never had any doubts. It had always been his job to provide stability in their budding relationship. He didn’t think he needed to be thanked for that; it was what someone was supposed to do. It was the right thing, and he was so, so grateful.
It also made him want to cry again, and Diego tried to smile, though it looked weak and wobbly. He clutched Grace’s hand. “Good night, mijo.” Although he’d used that word with Finn before, it took on a deeper meaning now. His son. Diego still couldn’t believe it. Mijo. He couldn’t help comparing his life now to that of Cassian’s. It was vastly different, and Diego felt more compelled to hold onto what he had now than ever before. He didn’t want to lose this.