InsaneJournal

Current mood:

depressed

It's getting bad again
Actually, today is the best day I've had this week. At least today I can write about how I feel. The first part of the week I got nothing done. I still feel like I have no friends I can count on to support me when I'm really in trouble. I am stuck on a project here, and don't know how to move forward. It would help if I knew where to get ahold of a small amount of construction-grade explosives, but I don't.

My wife is upset. She can see me sliding back into depression, and she is worried about me and about herself. She has a lot going on at work as well. This really isn't a good time for me to need lots of help from her.

Gee, wouldn't it be cool if I could mix some of my medicines into explosives?

The kids are fighting more, probably because they are worried about the increasing instability here at home. That doesn't make it any easier on me, either, but since it's my fault, I guess I shouldn't complain.

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent, and pretending to listen. I'll talk to you again the next time I want to kill myself and no one cares.