Are Ya Achin'...For Some Bacon? (tag: Iris)
There were many great things about owning his own private island in the Pacific. The weather, for starters, and the constant view of the ocean. As a god who hailed from a land that was mostly sand, Bes could appreciate the abundance of water. There was no one who could tell him how he had to behave or what he could or couldn't do, none of which Bes would really have paid much attention to anyway. And there was something to be said for owning his own private paradise. The downside was, unless he was throwing one of his own parties, there was nothing really going on there. Fortunately, Hawaii was just a hop, skip, and a jump away. Less than that for a god.

As luaus went, the Old Lahaina Luau on Maui was reputed to be the best the islands had to offer. Bes had to agree. The incredible shows and amazing food put it a notch above the rest. It was also the most upscale luau of those he had ever attended. It was exactly the type of luau he would take Tauret to, if he could ever get her away from their homeland for an evening. Which meant, naturally, that when Bes decided it was party time, that was not the one he was going to see. He felt like participating, not sitting back and watching.

Such a mood called for a more inviting atmosphere, which was why he opted for the Island Breeze Hawaiian Lu'au at King Kamehameha's Kona Beach Hotel. The Big Island was known for being more touristy, which meant they were used to people like Bes bopping around. Later, like all the other luaus, he could sit back and eat and enjoy the marvelous show. In the meantime, he was going to have fun, drinking one Mai Tai after another and mingling with the other attendees. He'd also spent the afternoon getting to know some of the dancers, who viewed him as a boisterous tourist with deep tipping pockets and an infectious mood. So when the time finally came around for the hula lessons, they didn't think twice about the short, pudgy man sporting a grass skirt.

It might be corny, or even a bit ridiculous, but Bes wasn't going to go half way. So there he was, in his traditional lei, grass skirt and bare feet, following along as they taught the group of attendees the various moves. He loved watching the beautiful women moving, using their grace and curves to their advantage. It was a pity this particular luau didn't actually put the women in coconut bras, but it was a disappointment he could live with.