How I Met Your Father
(95500 words) by dracogotgame
Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Ginny Weasley/Blaise Zabini, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Harry Potter/OMC
Characters: Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, Ginny Weasley, Blaise Zabini, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, James Sirius Potter, Albus Severus Potter, Lily Luna Potter, Scorpius Malfoy
Additional Tags: Crossover, Adopted Children, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Flashbacks
Harry sits his kids down and tells them a story. A very long story.
The Price of ValorAuthor:
former lj user weasleywenchStatus:
What happens when someone you hate needs you more than anything else? When it's life or death, either battle to the end, or die trying.Warnings:
DH compliant, but ignores the Epilogue. Invasive medical procedures. Angst, Language, Lemon, Lime, OOC, Original Character(s), Smut, Violence, SlashAuthor's note:
Rating for later chapters: For the avoidance of any and all possible doubt, this story features a lot of plot and character development. The smut is quite a long way off.It seems that the author has disappeared from the fandom and has deleted all her fics, including any fic archives she was a member of. I asked around and someone was kind enough to share their copy with me. I have disabled comments to this post. If you want a copy of this fic, Click Here to Download PDF.
The Man In Draco's Bed & [Sequel] Grandpa's Little AngelAuthor:
former lj user cyanesnapeStatus:
NC17Summaries: The Man In Draco's Bed:
Lucius is hysterical…actually he would rather be dead. Draco has arrived at Malfoy Manor just in time for the Christmas Holidays…with his new husband, Harry Potter-Malfoy. The Malfoy Code of Honor™ demands that Lucius protect his new son-in-law and Voldemort is coming for Christmas dinner! Grandpa's Little Angel:
No one should have to suffer through two meltdowns, but Lucius Malfoy’s luck has run from bad to worse for the last four years. It all began when Harry Potter became his son-in-law.Warnings:
Angst, Language, Lemon, Lime, OOC, Smut, Violence, SlashThis is another one of my favorites that has disappeared from fanfic. I have disabled comments to this post. If you want a copy of this fic, Click Here to Download PDF.
Title: Inspected by No. 13
Archived @: FanficAuthors.net
Timeline: The Triwiz Tourney
Summary: The night before the first task, Harry discovers that his plan to out fly the dragon is doomed to failure. With no other choice, he makes a desperate play that actually works. Sometimes, escaping can be a trap of it's own.
Lady B's Observations: Had me laughing from beginning to end.
Excerpt from "Enough is Enough
" Chapter 21: The Goblins have decided enough is enough and help Harry overcome Dumbledore's manipulations. This is going to be fun.Fudge had had enough. The Aurors hadn't been able to get to the boy because of some shied of sorts. It was time to call in the help.
'POTTER I SHALL SEE YOU KISSED FOR YOUR CRIMES! DEMENTORS!'
The air started to get chilly as the creatures answered the call. Some students began to panic and flee as far away from the doors as possible, making the teacher's table very crowded. The ones Harry taught had drawn their wands. Harry quickly had Lady Hogwarts place a shield over the student body. She wasn't all that happy to allow these creatures in but he's asked so nicely. He planned on showing Fudge just who he was dealing with.
The six remaining dementors closed in on him. He smirked.
Prongs had a grand old time scaring away the buggers. Prancing around it tossed them around and gave a couple a good kicking. The dementors knew they were beat. All but one fled the scene, the remaining one backed into a corner.
With Prongs at the ready Harry approached the last one.
What happened next would go down in history.
'Hey buddy, want a hug?'
'Aww come on gimme a hug. You know you wanna'.
'I'll be your best friend'.
His joke backfired when he suddenly had an armful of sobbing, he thought it was sobbing, dementor. Prongs jerked towards him, before realising Harry wasn't in danger and faded away. The dementor was letting out wails and other such noises that Harry couldn't understand, but he was pretty sure the dementor was talking. And he'd be right. If he were able to understand dementor speech, he'd hear:
'You called me buddy! *sniff* No one's ever *sniff* called me buddy before! *sniff* No one's ever even *sniff* hugged me before! I just want a *sniff* friend! Everyone runs away *sniff* from me! I'll be your best buddy for ever and ever! *sniff* I won't steal your soul or *sniff* make it all cold! I'll be good *sniff* I promise!'
The entire school population stood in astonishment as Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, stood soothing a wailing creature of darkness.
It would appear that Potter manor would be having another house mate.
Fudge and the Aurors began to back away slowly until they reached the corridor, where they proceeded to run all the way to the gates and apparate to the ministry.
Arrest Harry Potter, not bloody likely!
Piper JulianArchived @:
Voldemort avoided death as a spirit for 13 years. Strangely, he couldn't avoid a bus. One Shot.Lady B's Observations:
Do not be reading or drinking anything when you read this. I laughed for 5 minutes straight while I was eating M&M's and nearly choked. My stomach is pleasantly sore. ^_^
Title: Rumor Has It
Summary: There are a lot of strange rumours floating around about Potter and Malfoy. Rated T for swearing and excessive references to cherries.
Archived @: Fanfiction.net
My observations: You know how it works; Person A tells Person B a secret then Person B tells Person C only Person B gets the words mixed up and by the time the secret reaches Person Z, the whole story has changed. Yeah, this is one of those. And it's funny. :-)
It's been quite some time since I rec'd a story. Came across this one in a fic rec community and gave it a read...it's pretty good!Title: Poison PenAuthor:
No pairings - Harry Potter, Albus Dumbledore, Filius Flitwick, Ragnok, The Goblins of Gringotts, et alRating:
Harry has had enough of seeing his reputation shredded in the Daily Prophet and decides to do something about it. Only he decides to embrace his Slytherin side to rectify matters.Status:
WIP with 25 chapters, last updated March, 26, 2010
Title: You Had Me From...
Author: La Nuit
Archived @: HPFandom.net
Status: WIP @ 7 Chapters, last update July, 5, 2009
Genre: Post-War, Romance, Humor, H/C
Summary: Post-war and a lot has changed at Hogwarts. The Golden Trio return for their seventh year and Harry learns just how very powerful words are...Lady B's Observations:
Harry doesn't think he's gay, especially gay for one Draco Malfoy, and he sets out to prove it...but the rest of the student body can clearly see that he is. The river of De Nile is long and paved with good intentions.
You'll definitely laugh at this one. Updates are slow but worth the wait.
Title: Broken Wings
Archived @: Fanfiction.net
Characters: Severus/Harry father/son relationship
Summary: Desperate to escape his guilt and nightmares after the third task,Harry transforms into a hawk by accident and ends up breaking both wings and suffering partial memory loss. He is found by Snape, who helps him and discovers the truth about his professor.
Status: WIP @ 6 chapters, last updated March 30, 2009 - updates once a week.
Lady B's notes: An animagus story with a twist. From what I've read so far, it's very good. And you must bear witness to a whiny, bitchy "Please don't tell daddy on me" Draco. It's amusing to watch.