|Fred Burkle (brillianttexan) wrote in dark_will,|
@ 2008-01-16 10:09:00
Fred did as Rupert instructed and closed her eyes. She didn't look around the room so she could memorize what she could've had. Getting what you always wanted, only to have it torn away was hard. And it hurt to know she would never get it back. Fred knew she would never experience any of this again, unless she turned her back on Rupert and walked out of his life. But she didn't know if that was possible.
There was a tug and the hair on her arms prickled. Soon she heard Rupert's voice and could feel the surface of a bed underneath her. Fred opened her eyes but refused to look at him. Instead, she looked around the bedroom. It was so different from the one she'd just been in; it wasn't warm or inviting. The walls held no pictures of a happy family and the room seemed dank and dark compared to the other one. The bed even felt cold.
She pushed herself up to a sitting position, her eyes never falling upon Rupert. The door opened and a woman came in, Fred studied her for a long moment, wondering who she was.
"Are you all right, Fred?" the woman asked.
Fred's lips twitched a little and she almost felt like laughing. It was a loaded question with a long answer but she decided not to bore them with the details. "No," she finally answered. The woman moved closer and went to touch Fred's arm. "Don't touch me."
Without saying another word, or looking at Rupert, Fred slipped out of the of bed and left the room. She made her way down the stairs and to the main part of the penthouse. Fred stood there and looked at the decor of the room. It was so neat and straight. The coffee table had sharp edges and there were knickknacks on the bottom shelves. Certainly not a place for children. It was too cold and empty there to have a child.
Maybe Rupert had brought out darkness in her but she was still Fred. She was still the girl who'd dreamed of having a family. Fred knew he didn't want that and she was all right with it until now. It hurt because she had always promised herself she would never give up her dreams unless it was necessary. Was being with Rupert a good enough reason?
The silence of the room was broken when Brahms suddenly meowed. Fred looked down at him as the cat rubbed against her legs and purred. She let out a small laugh at the irony of the situation. A cat would be the closest thing she ever got to a child, even then she practically had to beg Rupert to let her keep it. It was becoming clear to Fred that the man she was with had serious control issues - it seemed Rupert didn't like what he couldn't control.
Fred picked up Brahms and carried him to the couch. Sitting down, she cradled him close and looked toward the stairs. She couldn't help but to wonder if Rupert only wanted her because he thought she was easy to control. Maybe their relationship was more about control than it was about love and compromise.
Suddenly, Fred wished she was at home in Texas and not there.