InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Bust out the white dragon!"

Benjamin J. Montague (benjamming) wrote in dalton_rpg,
@ 2011-05-12 03:22:00

Entry tags:

! thread, @ character: benjamin montague, @ character: blaine jackson

Who: Ben & Blaine
What: Pre-Nationals check up, leading up to snuggling and a long-pondered question
Where: Johnson #401
When: Late night, May 11th
Rating: SFW

After being Blaine's friend for a while, Ben liked to think that he knew his fellow senior well enough by now. With being his best friend (amongst other things), Ben had picked up on several things about Blaine that other people perhaps might not have noticed. Such as the way he tugged at one particular curl when he was anxious or the offhanded way in which he rubbed at his scarred thigh when he was deep in thought. Right now, with only a few days until Nationals, Ben would bet both his money and his life that Blaine was stressing quietly on the inside whilst trying his best to keep everything together.

Since neither of them were on RA duty that evening, Ben waited until the halls were quiet before leaving his room and making his way upstairs. Upon reaching room 401, he stopped and knocked quietly on the door before waiting for an answer, hoping that his friend was awake and that his knocking hadn't woken Jude up.

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blackson
2011-05-12 02:44 am UTC (link)

Blaine was lying in his bed in the dark room, staring blankly at the bottom of Jude's bed. What were they doing!? They hadn't qualified for Nationals. Why the hell did they think they were good enough? The Warblers hadn't made it this far in years...

Blaine's thoughts were interrupted by the knock on his door. Frowning a little, he rolled out of bed and opened the locked door, blinking in the bright light from the hall.

"Ben? Is everything all right?"

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benjamming
2011-05-12 02:52 am UTC (link)

Stepping back a little as the door opened, Ben smiled and nodded. "Everything is fine with me," he replied, taking in Blaine's appearance. Just boxers due to the heat, the intricate scar poking out from under the hem of his shorts. That one curl had obviously been pulled on because it was sticking up slightly. The crease of worry between his eyebrows. So predictable.

"It's you who isn't fine," he continued, moving a hand up to the front pocket of his hoodie. Pulling out a box, he handed it over to Blaine before resting a hand on his friend's shoulder. Nudging him back inside, Ben followed and closed the door quietly behind himself. Lowering his voice to a whisper as he spotted Jude's sleeping form, he smiled. "You're stressing out, I can tell."

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blackson
2011-05-12 02:54 am UTC (link)

"What are you talking about?" Blaine asked, smiling a little at the Junior Mints before putting the candy on his bedside table (he loved them, yes, but not after he had brushed his teeth for the night and was trying to drift off). "I'm fine..." He moved back to his bed, where his comforter was thrown to the foot of his bed and just his thin sheet pulled up near his pillows.

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benjamming
2011-05-12 02:58 am UTC (link)

Arching one eyebrow, Ben's smile remained as he followed Blaine. Extending a hand, he gently tugged on the tell-tale strand of hair. "You play with this when you're stressed," he muttered, letting it spring back after a moment. His eyes then caught one of Blaine's numerous pillows and he nodded towards it, "You've been hugging that to yourself since Jude went to sleep, perhaps longer."

Sitting down on Blaine's bed, the Brit continued to look at him. "I know you almost as well as you know yourself," he said, "Don't think I don't know that you're worrying about the weekend."

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	blackson 2011-05-12 03:00 am UTC (link)
	Blaine glanced at the pillow and ducked his head guiltily. "So what if I have?" he asked, his fingers drifting to his leg, picking at the scar tissue there. "It's not a crime to cuddle a pillow in the absence of a lover..." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 03:05 am UTC (link)

With a small sigh, Ben shrugged. "I'm not saying that you're not allowed to," he replied, "Just stating that you had. It's something you do when you're worried."

Licking his lips slightly, he regarded his friend with a sad smile. "Are you still having trouble sleeping?" he asked curiously, knowing about Blaine's history of insomnia since the events that occurred during Christmas. Adding stress onto that initial anxiety definitely couldn't be a good thing and if Blaine needed to sleep at all, the run up to the biggest show choir competition of his life thus far was the most important time to be getting the rest.

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	blackson 2011-05-12 03:06 am UTC (link)
	Blaine sighed, giving a slight nod as he flipped his pillow over for the cool side and flopped down again. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 03:10 am UTC (link)

Watching as Blaine lay down, Ben frowned. A moment later and he was on his hands and knees, crawling up the bed so that he was next to his friend. Laying down beside him, Ben tentatively rested his head on the pillow and brought one hand up to nudge Blaine's face towards him.

"Want me to stay here tonight?" he asked quietly, one of his arms coming up so that he could brush at Blaine's hair gently. He knew that the other boy tended to sleep better when he wasn't alone and if Ben could help in any way, he would.

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	blackson 2011-05-12 03:14 am UTC (link)
	"Won't Raf miss you?" Blaine murmured back, reaching up to smooth his fingers over Ben's cheek. He would like Ben to stay with him, but he didn't want to take Ben from his boyfriend either. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 03:27 am UTC (link)

Trying not to let his frown show, Ben shook his head slightly so that he didn't disturb Blaine's touch. "He's on RA duty tonight," he replied, sighing softly to himself as he let his eyes flicker closed for a moment. Upon opening them again, he smiled at his friend before shuffling a little closer.

"Is it okay for me to take this off?" he asked then, pulling at the front of his hoodie with his fingers. He didn't want to overstep any unspoken boundaries that still might be in place between the pair of them.

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	blackson 2011-05-12 03:28 am UTC (link)
	"Yeah, go ahead," Blaine said. "Make yourself comfortable. Too hot to be anything else..." He let his eyes drift mostly-closed, watching Ben, though. The other boy was hot, and Blaine had no rules about eye-candy after brushing his teeth. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 03:32 am UTC (link)

With a small nod, Ben sat up for a moment and removed his hoodie. Folding it half-heartedly, he tossed it down towards the end of the bed before laying back down and resting one arm over Blaine's waist. "It's been forever since we did this," he commented, his eyes sweeping the other boy's face as he once against rested his head down on the pillow. "You do know that if you have trouble sleeping, I don't mind doing this. Right?" Okay, so maybe he couldn't be there every night but he would be there as often as he was able. Blaine was still his best friend, after all.

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	blackson 2011-05-12 03:34 am UTC (link)
	"You have a boyfriend, Jammers," Blaine pointed out, even as he shifted a little closer to Ben. Really, it was too hot for full-on snuggling, but just having Ben's company there helped him relax. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	benjamming 2011-05-12 03:36 am UTC (link)
	"I know that," Ben replied, knowing that this would be an issue. He didn't exactly want to talk about Raf in that moment though, but it seemed inevitable. "But we aren't doing anything wrong. If it helps you then it's okay. I want to help you and you need to sleep. Raf will understand." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	blackson 2011-05-12 03:36 am UTC (link)
	Blaine just gave another sigh and closed his eyes, bumping his forehead lightly against Ben's shoulder. "... thanks." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 03:44 am UTC (link)

Sliding his hand up to bury in the back of Blaine's curls, Ben leaned down in order to place a kiss to his friend's forehead. "It's okay," he replied, "Anything for you."

After a few moments of quietness in which he simply listened to the pair of them (and Jude) breathing, Ben let his other hand move down to rest gently on Blaine's thigh. It seemed like a natural, comfortable spot in which to set his palm, so he didn't feel that he was overstepping his place. It just so happened that he brushed Blaine's scar, the skin slightly bumped under his hand. Almost automatically, he let his index finger trace over the lines, watching Blaine's face as he did so.

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	blackson 2011-05-12 03:47 am UTC (link)
	Blaine let his arm slip down to rest over Ben's side, his expression giving the slightest twitch of tightness before it smoothed out again as Ben stroked over his leg. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	benjamming 2011-05-12 03:52 am UTC (link)
	Ben was observant enough to notice the slight and brief change in Blaine's expression. It made him stop as he paused momentarily before returning his hand up to rest on the other boy's waist as he muttered a slightly shameful apology: "Sorry, I didn't mean to." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	blackson 2011-05-12 03:53 am UTC (link)
	"It's okay," Blaine said. "I don't mind you doing that..." Ben had gotten a close look at that scar many times over the past year, after all. If he hadn't noticed the hidden word by now, Blaine doubted he would. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 03:59 am UTC (link)

With a slight nod, Ben hesitantly returned his hand down to cover Blaine's scar. He pondered upon it for a moment, wondering whether or not this was an appropriate discussion to have. He'd wondered many times since he'd first been made aware of the scar why it was there, yet he'd never asked. He'd been curious, of course. He wasn't sure how bad the memories associated with it were though, for he'd spotted the word and figured that the tiger was in place to hide it.

Licking his lips nervously, Ben moved his other hand to rest on Blaine's cheek. Urging the other boy to look at him, Ben give him a compassionate look before tentatively speaking. "What happened?" he whispered, wondering if Blaine would want to answer. "I've never asked before and it's okay if you don't want to tallk about it..."

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	blackson 2011-05-12 04:00 am UTC (link)
	"My first boyfriend was a guy named Gary," Blaine said, letting his eyes drift open lazily. "He runs a tattoo/piercing shop, does scarifications and stuff. He talked me into it..." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 04:04 am UTC (link)

With a small nod, Ben waited for a moment as he looked at Blaine sadly. Inclining his head towards the other boy, he gently pecked at his lips before muttering. "I know what it says underneath," he confided, his eyes moving down to the scar as the tip of his finger traced over the word. A moment later and his palm was covering it again, his eyes fixed on Blaine's as he waited for his friend to continue.

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	blackson 2011-05-12 04:06 am UTC (link)
	Blaine closed his eyes, pressing his lips together into a thin line before he spoke again, his voice a bare whisper. "Eighth grade. Got caught by a psychopath in the locker room showers after a swim class. Parents sued the school, got a lovely settlement that paid for relocation to Ohio and my tuition here." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 04:11 am UTC (link)

Upon hearing that, it suddenly made so much sense. It was the reason why Blaine would always wait for him after swim practice outside of the locker room and refused to go inside, despite the offers to make it worth his while. It stemmed from this, such a traumatic event that had clearly changed Blaine's life.

"I'm so sorry," Ben muttered, once again kissing Blaine lightly before resting their foreheads together. His free hand moved up to affectionately brush at his friend's hair, his own bottom lip being nibbled for a moment as he pondered on what to say next.

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	blackson 2011-05-12 04:13 am UTC (link)
	Blaine heaved a deep sigh, pressing close against Ben, heat be damned. "How long have you known about... the word?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 04:18 am UTC (link)

"I thought I saw it the first time you ever showed it to me, but then I assumed I was imagining it," Ben whispered back, his hold on Blaine tightening as the other boy cuddled closer. "I mean, I was still struggling with coming to terms with myself so I thought I was just being self-depreciating and seeing things that weren't really there."

Pausing for a moment, he sighed and closed his eyes. "When I looked more intently the next few times, I noticed that it was still there. So pretty much from the first time you ever showed it to me."

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	blackson 2011-05-12 04:23 am UTC (link)
	"That obvious still, huh?" Blaine sighed again. "It's why I ran from Gary the first time he tried to have sex. I couldn't actually bring myself to take my pants off." He smiled weakly against Ben's shoulder. "Say all you want about my older guys, Gary was a winner." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 04:26 am UTC (link)

"I don't think it's obvious," Ben replied, "I think I just looked too hard. I wanted to memorise every single inch of you, so I studied you harder than I probably normally would have anyone else."

Sliding his hand up and down Blaine's back, Ben rolled his eyes slightly at the mention of older guys. "I'm sure some of them had to have been. I mean, they were dating you and you only deserve the best."

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	blackson 2011-05-12 04:28 am UTC (link)
	"I just wanted no one else to ever see it," Blaine admitted. "I'd never forget it was there, but... that didn't have to mean everyone else would know." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	benjamming 2011-05-12 04:30 am UTC (link)
	"We never have to talk about it again," Ben said after a moment. Kissing Blaine's forehead, he forced a weak smile. "That's why I never brought it up until now. I didn't want to upset you. But I guess curiosity finally won out." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	blackson 2011-05-12 04:32 am UTC (link)
	"I told Noah," Blaine said. "No one else here. Just Noah, and now you." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	benjamming 2011-05-12 04:35 am UTC (link)
	keeping his expression neutral, Ben nodded. Okay, so he was a little ~~jealous~~ disconcerted that Noah had found out before him, but it wasn't some major issue. Besides, he knew now. "I love you," he whispered after a moment. He just hoped that by now, Blaine could appreciate the sentiment and believe what he was saying. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	blackson 2011-05-12 04:39 am UTC (link)
	"I love you too," Blaine murmured, tipping his head back to press a soft kiss to Ben's mouth. "So much." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

benjamming
2011-05-12 10:58 am UTC (link)

Smiling at the warm feeling such words gave him, Ben hugged Blaine loosely and rested his cheek against the other boy's curls. He was increasingly glad that whatever problems they'd been having lately seemed to have dissipated at least a little. In fact, it sort of felt a little like old times.

"I know you do," he muttered back, giving Blaine a little squeeze of recognition. "Thank you."

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