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pre_raphaelite1 (pre_raphaelite1) wrote in daily_deviant,
@ 2007-12-10 06:08:00

Entry tags:

*kinky kristmas 2007, artist: cnary_crem_dght, author: pre_raphaelite1, author: snapelike, character: arthur, character: ginny, character: moony, character: regulus, character: sirius, character: wormtail, content: adultery, content: anal, content: bestiality, content: blowjobs, content: chan, content: corsets, content: crossdressing, content: incest, content: necrophilia, content: non-con, content: rimming, content: sounding, content: voyeurism

Fic and Art: "A Christmas Tale as Sung by Wormtail..." (Moony/Arthur/Ginny/Sirius/et al)
Title: A Christmas Tale as Sung by Wormtail the Rat, or Something Like That...
Authors: pre_raphaelite1 and snapelike
Artist: cnary_crem_dght
Characters: Arthur, Ginny, Moony, Wormtail, Sirius, Regulus, Crookshanks, Mrs Norris
Rating: NC-17 and NWS
Warnings: Songfic (sort of), crack (definitely), incest, chan, bestiality, cannibalism, snuff, cross-dressing, rimming, snowballing, sounding, necrophilia, gang bang, non-con, dub-con, scat, prostitution and adultery, a bit of blasphemy- and generally yuckiness!
Themes/kinks chosen: Kinky Kristmas 2007. And kinks? What kinks?
Word Count: 460. Yes. Not 4,600. Or 46,000. It's Christmas and people are busy!
Media: Photoshop
Summary: You know those 'Shakespeare's Complete in 30 minutes?' Yeah? Okay. They are a complete waste of time. We have everything that he has, and much faster. Now with pictures. Eat your heart out, Bill, old chap!
A/N: *cnary and lysa1 point at pre_raphaelite* 'It is all her fault!!!' OI! What? Am I the ONLY pervert around here? *cnary & lysa, nodding* Yes! *sighs theatrically* Alright.

A Christmas Tale as Sung by Wormtail the Rat, or Something Like That...
- turn on the Karaoke and sing-along to the tune of It Came Upon a Midnight Clear!

I came upon a orgy queer
A perverted sight to see
Arthur's cock inside his daughter
Her arse squeaking wetly
"Jesus, Daddy, fuck me harder"
was Ginny's breathless cry.
But Arthur's speed was constrained
by Moony humping his thigh.

"Stop whining and suck my cock"
Sirius told the twelve year old
And Ginny opened her eager mouth
To do as she was told.
Even with his face in Regulus' arse,
His moans were loud and long.
All went well until the time
he sounded his brother's schlong.

Regulus had long been dead
But here just for the night
His skin was peeling all around
But his slit was nicely tight.
Sirius worked in the rod
Down the length of cock
But then when he tugged it back
The whole dick pulled right off.

This drew a yelp from Regulus
Who was fingering feline twat.
"What the fuck, you broke my zombie cock!
I need that to rape the cat."
But anything more I didn't catch
because something ate my ears.
I screamed and squealed to no avail,
and shat out all my fears.

Below me, Crookshanks gave a jump,
As rat crap fell upon his head
In one step Moony was over him,
then the corseted cat was dead.
"Stop this instant!'"Arthur cried,
"I want to suck you now."
Moony whined and soon obliged,
using his cock as a plough.

I swung my Christmas hat in cheer,
as Arthur swallowed the prick,
And Moony growled and panted loud,
he came, oh, far too quick.
Arthur licked it eagerly up
then spit it onto Ginnys' tongue.
"Oi, that is my Moony's come!"
So to Sirius it was flung.

"Hey what about my zombie cock!?
You've still got it on a stick."
Regulus was petulant.
Werewolf come on said prick
And Sirius shoved it in Reg's arse
Stuffing him with his own knob.
Again and again he shoved it in
Until it was a mangled blob.

But when Regulus finally came
Instead of creamy spunk
Something else flew from his cock
And it really stunk.
The splatters were white and moving;
The bastard spurted maggots
All over Ginny's sloppy cunt
"Wriggle, filthy faggots!

"Wriggle into her loose fanny!"
Sirius' cry was nearly a howl;
Then he thrust his cock deep into
That buggy hole moste foul.
Jealous of where his prick was,
I wished could climb inside;
Warm and wet and with tasty snacks,
Perfect for my furry hide.

Arthur was too tired to fuck:
"Enough! I can't stand any more!
Our holy maid is no more a maid,
Don't forget to pay the whore!"
I try to wriggle my way out of that,
A rat never pays the price.
I hear Moony's ragged breath over me,
And try to run aw-

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(Post a new comment)

r_grayjoy
2007-12-10 02:29 pm UTC (link)

Oh, dear GOD. ::eyes fall out of head and roll around the desk top::

What the fuck, you broke my zombie cock!

...And that was when I lost it. I'm still giggling at the UTTER WRONG, and I sincerely hope no one asks me what's so funny, because it's UTTERLY WRONG and I can't tell anyone what I'm laughing about and... oh, damn, I'm so ashamed of myself.

I'm going to hell just for existing on the same planet as this! LMFAO

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	pre_raphaelite1 2007-12-10 02:33 pm UTC (link)
	cackles The line is even better when it's sung! Well don't worry- all of us ~~perverts~~ cool people will be there! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kabal42 2007-12-10 03:58 pm UTC (link)
	Goodness gracious! I haven't laughed this hard in ages! There's this point (and you lot, thankfully, manage to hit that almost right away) where squick becomes so weird that it's just funny. So I laughed. And laughed. All the way through. (And yet, part of me still curses my vivid imagination. Ew.) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	letoutthetiger 2007-12-10 04:14 pm UTC (link)
	Honestly, PreR managed to squick herself at some point. I had to scrub my brain with bleach. I am still in a state of denial. I promise! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	joiedumonde 2007-12-10 05:45 pm UTC (link)
	Totally agreeing with the previous comment. There are some squicks that are only readable when written in crack!fic. And you all managed to hit almost every single one of them. I really shouldn't have read this while I was waiting for my pizza to arrive, because I answered the door humming it, and cracking myself up. The pizza guy was quite confused. -joie (Reply to this) (Thread)

	pre_raphaelite1 2007-12-10 05:48 pm UTC (link)
	Almost? Oh no, what did we miss? giggles snorts You could have shared with him! He might have enjoyed it! tries to resist urge to make joke about chopped olives on cheese resembling Wormtail droppings on Crookshanks mostly succeeds (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)