Kristmas Wish Fulfilled for: ozma_katiebellFrom: leela_catTitle:
Wound Up In KnotsCharacters/Pairings:
Bondage, Dom/sub relationshipOther Warnings/Content:
It takes the unconditional trust of another for Tonks to learn to trust herself again.Author's Notes:
My thanks to R and E for their beta work and brainstorming.
Harry's kind, pitying expression when he stepped into the Floo, taking Teddy away for the weekend, hit Tonks like a Bludger. As soon as the green flames subsided and she was sure Teddy was safe, she threw a curse at the hearth. The embers sputtered and flared up, but it didn't help her feel better.
She just didn't understand what they all expected her to do. How could she bring someone else into Teddy's life, trust them with his well-being, after he'd lost two parental figures? He hadn't known Remus, but he still asked for reassurance that his Daddy had loved him. And then there had been the disastrous relationship with Angelina, who'd dumped both of them to move in with George Weasley.
Then again, she thought, remembering Teddy's pleading look and his parting admonition to, "have fun and be happy, Mummy," she had a feeling Teddy might be more ready to have someone else in their lives than she was.
With a dispirited sigh, she swung her cloak over her shoulders and headed for the back garden so she could Apparate to Pansy's house for their -- she halted, shocked by the realisation that this was their fifth not-quite-date. Had she slipped into a relationship without noticing?o0O0o
The front door opened as soon as Tonks's knuckles touched the wood. She stepped into the darkened hallway and frowned, fighting an urge to leave and accept that she'd been mistaken and Pansy wasn't expecting her. But then she heard a whisper of sound from up the stairs and the former Auror in her felt compelled to check it out.
Carefully removing her cloak and placing it in a heap near the door, where someone running would be bound to trip over it, she pulled her wand from its holster, cast a Silencing Spell on her feet and a Creak Avoidance Charm on the steps, and began to move up the stairs. She placed her feet carefully, paying attention to everything, as she'd been taught in Auror training, to ensure that she neither tripped nor fell nor did anything that might alert whoever was upstairs.
She passed two portraits. The woman hung on the landing placed a finger over her carefully painted red lips and pointed towards the back of the house. The two little boys in the frame on the upper hallway giggled and waved frantically at her, and their mother and father made gestures ushering her towards a closed door.
A faint light was visible from beneath the door. Tonks paused to listen and realised that the sound she'd been hearing was a whimper. It tore at her, drew her, made her want to take care of Pansy in ways that she hadn't taken care of anyone since Remus.o0O0o
Pansy was ensconced on top of her bedcovers, propped up by a mound of pillows. Her hair hung loose, free for once of the grooming spells and potions that Tonks hated, her face was bare of make-up, and she was wearing black silk boxers and a worn cotton t-shirt. Tonks's attention, however, was riveted to the length of twisted hemp rope that Pansy was holding.
"Do you trust yourself?" Pansy spread her legs and began to draw the piece of rope over the thin silk covering her clit -- the damp
, thin silk. Up and down, the coarse texture of the hemp hissing against the smooth material.
"What--" Disconcerted by the intensity of Pansy's gaze and by her own instant arousal, Tonks cleared her throat and tried again. "What's going on? Everything was dark downstairs, and the portraits are all acting strangely."
"I asked," Pansy said, arching her hips and releasing a whimpering noise, before continuing in a much huskier voice, "whether you trust yourself."
"It depends, I suppose, on the circumstances."
Wrapping some of the excess around her left forearm, Pansy pulled the rope so taut that the spiky fibres pierced the silk and pressed into her flesh. Into her vulva, her clit
. Tonks's breath caught, the back of her mouth dried and opened up, and feelings, wants, needs
began flickering to life. Her fingers flexed with the desire to take that hemp and show Pansy how it could be, how it should be done.
She focussed inwards, tried to control her breathing and push away that part of her life. The part she'd locked up and sealed away after waking up from a curse-induced coma to find herself a single mother.
"I trust you." Pansy's words were soft, sultry, and closer.
Tonks opened her eyes to see Pansy on her knees at the end of the bed, swaying slightly. The hemp was a wet, dark spiral against the white bedcovers next to her.
"I trust you," Pansy repeated. "And I know that you can do this for me. I need
you to do this for me. Please."
The last word jolted through Tonks like a bolt of spellfire aimed directly at her clit. She licked her lips and croaked, "Why?"
Settling back on her haunches and resting her hands on her bare thighs, Pansy bent her head. "I don't... I can't..." She took a deep breath. "Control. I can't do it myself. I've tried. Salazar knows I've tried. But it doesn't work. I lose control. I start doing things, saying things. Stupid things. Crazy things. Because I want, I need someone to bring me back down, to enforce limits, to... I don't even know. I just know that I can't do it for myself."
Tonks moved, drawn to Pansy by the way her hair fell forwards, exposing the nape of her neck, by the yearning in her words and her body. Reaching out, she grasped Pansy's chin and lifted her head to see her expression. She kept hold of her wand, though, just in case.
However, it was all there in Pansy's eyes: defiance, vulnerability, arousal, and entreaty. It wasn't a prank or a way to humiliate Tonks. It was real.
"I'm not good at begging," Pansy murmured. "But I'll do it if that's what you want."
Pansy flushed, points of colour developing high on her cheekbones. She tried to duck her head again, to break eye contact, but Tonks tightened her grip, digging her fingers lightly into Pansy's skin, and Pansy stopped.
"You said you trusted me," Tonks said, "and I require an explanation."
A sigh shuddered through Pansy, and her muscles relaxed. "Last month. You sent me to get the boxes of Teddy's old toys and clothes from the spare room. I accidentally knocked over another box when I was Summoning those, and its contents spilled all over." The tip of Pansy's tongue came out and dug into the centre of her top lip. "There were toys, some pictures of... of Lupin. He was bound."
A memory of the day that she and Remus had first tried Shibari rose in Tonks's memory. She pushed it away and focussed on the present, on the way Pansy's eyes darted down to one side.
Realising what must have happened, Tonks asked, "The rope?"
Defiance sparked in Pansy, and she said, "You'd locked it all away. I didn't think you'd notice it was gone."
"I didn't," Tonks replied, silently adding, and I probably wouldn't have
. "But that's hardly the point. You say you trust me, but I have to be able to trust you if we do what you want."
Pansy's tongue crept out again, sweeping over her lips and wetting them. "I'm sorry."
And she was, Tonks could see that. But she also wasn't. Because Pansy was Slytherin, and Tonks had been raised by one, which meant she understood, that she couldn't expect Pansy to be too apologetic if her subterfuge worked. So, she changed the subject just a little. "How often have you masturbated with it?"
Pansy twitched. Her pupils dilated, her mouth parted, her hips jerked, and she released a tiny, incoherent noise. The kind of noise that Tonks wanted to drag from her again and again and again.
"Shall I use it on you?" Tonks asked, keeping a tight grip on her own arousal even as she watched Pansy shift and sway. "Shall I wrap it around your wrists and tie you to the bed posts? Or shall I knot it and bind you with it? Using my fingers to press a knot into your vagina and against your clit? Roughness against your nipples, rubbing, twisting--"
"Ah!" Pansy rose up, her hips undulating, her legs opening, and she came, falling forwards. Trusting Tonks to catch her.
And Tonks was lost. Arousal was thick and heavy between her legs, and she wanted, needed, was going to have Pansy for her own.
She pushed Pansy back to sprawl over the bed and flicked her wand, activating the charms in the rope to ensure she could guide it with her hands. Just to be sure, she placed her wand on the bed and gestured.
The rope uncurled, slid across the bed and over Pansy's hips, trapping her in place and drawing another moan out of her. A snap of Tonks's fingers caused the rope to duplicate itself. The second length slithered up Pansy's body and circled her breasts.
Pansy shuddered and gasped, "Please?"
Taking her time, Tonks undressed. She folded her trousers and shirt, carefully placing her clothes on the dressing table and lining up her boots on the floor next to it. Then, aware that Pansy had lifted her head and was watching her every move, she sauntered over to the bed and crawled between Pansy's spread legs, pushing them up and farther apart.
She gazed down, at the still-swollen, reddened nub that was just visible between the folds of Pansy's vulva, at the quivering muscles, and felt an answering flutter in herself. Reaching down and hooking the tip of her thumb into Pansy's vagina, she met Pansy's eyes.
"We'll have to talk," she said, her voice low and threaded with desire. "We'll need to discuss limits and safe words, what you like and don't like, and what you aren't even aware that you like yet."
"Later." Pansy twisted her hips, clearly trying to get Tonks to push in further. "Can't think now."
With a sharp movement, Tonks drove her thumb into Pansy and watched in satisfaction as Pansy's head fell back and her entire body arched into Tonks.
"Later it is, then," Tonks said, pulling out of Pansy and raising her hands. "But there won't be another time until we do."
After Pansy agreed, Tonks snapped her fingers to create another length of rope. Another series of hand movements had the ropes moving. The upper one lengthened, narrowed, smoothed enough to ensure her skin would be sensitised rather than abraded, and began spiralling around Pansy's breasts, moving constantly and slowly.
The single knot on the middle rope went into Pansy's belly button, and it tightened enough to press into her skin.
Tonks picked up the last piece, ensuring that it was tied appropriately. "Ask for what you want," she said, dangling it between Pansy's legs. "I don't read minds. I won't use Legilimency on you. Not for this." She swung it just enough to rap a knot against Pansy's vulva.
"Merlin, yes." Pansy clutched at the covers. "More. Need more. Not enough."
Tonks smiled. "Good."
Leaving the rope to tap an irregular rhythm against Pansy, she moved up, her own breasts hanging down so that her nipples were stroked by the same bit of hemp that was caressing Pansy', and she kissed her. Tasting her, testing her, sucking her tongue, nibbling her lips, until Pansy was writhing beneath her and her own need had risen to a near unbearable pitch.
Then she turned around, curving herself over Pansy so that her own crotch was in Pansy's face and her face was between Pansy's legs. A couple of adjustments, and she was supported on her elbows in such as way that she could touch Pansy.
The rope dropped into place, and she pushed a knotted end inside Pansy, twisting it to ensure that Pansy could feel the coarse fibres against her inner walls.
"Lick me," she ordered.
Pansy gripped Tonks's hips and pulled herself up. Tentatively at first, awkwardly, she obeyed.
Bracing herself to bear Pansy's weight, enjoying the quiver of her own muscles, Tonks began to play. Moving her fingers and the rope in and out of Pansy. Rubbing the knot over and around Pansy's clit. Rocking, back and forth, she pressed herself against Pansy's face. Pansy's shuddering breaths and the irregular swirling of her tongue took Tonks higher and higher.
Faster and faster, until Pansy was pleading and begging in incoherent noises, barely holding on, no longer able to do more than allow Tonks to rub against her face. Pansy's body jerked uncontrollably as she attempted to grind herself onto Tonks's fingers, twisting her hips, digging her toes into the bed and trying to spread her legs wider and wider.
Almost crossing her eyes as she forced herself to focus, Tonks lengthened her tongue so that it could reach Pansy. She lapped and flicked, moving around her own fingers and the rope. Faster and faster, praying that Pansy would come before she ran out of energy.
Then Pansy arched and moaned. Her hips juddered, and her vagina clenched around Tonks's fingers. And waves of want, of need, of completion crashed through Tonks, leaving her shaking and barely able to find the strength to remove the ropes, turn herself around, and draw Pansy into her arms.
Pansy wrapped herself around Tonks, and Tonks held her tight. She ran a hand down Pansy's back, showing her appreciation and enjoying the aftershocks that still trembled through Pansy's muscles.
She could do this, Tonks thought, as she drifted towards sleep. She could trust herself, and she could trust Pansy. With everything.