topazlily (topazlily) wrote in crow_syndrome, @ 2008-03-06 23:29:00 |
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Current mood: | aggravated |
MELODY KARI STARLIGHT, DEMON-SLAYING RPG SUE
Part One
Story Or Series Title: The Warrior and the Demon Slayer
Fandom: Lord of the Munchkins.
Culprit Author's Name: Melody Kari Starlight
What follows is not my write-up, but the Suethor’s. It’s how she starts the story.
Think this looks suspiciously like an RGB profile? Give yourself a cookie (But don’t harass her, PLEASE. It’ll just get me into trouble.)
Name: Melody Kari Starlight Also– The Slayer.
Gender: Female.
Species: Half-Demon and half Angel (but looks human)
Home world: The Other Realm but was sent to earth.
Age: Unknown but looks to be in her teens yet she can look 20 to 25 years of age.
Height: 6"0
Weight: 8 stone
Build: Slim yet Muscular
Skin colour: white (But on earth it is a light peach)
Eye Colour: Crystal Blue with grey that makes it seem as if her eyes are swirling.
Hair Colour: Dark Brown with light brown highlights naturally.
Clothing: Black jeans and a black No Angel's top. The top has no sleeves and has a sliver chain that goes a cross the top. She also wears a black jacket
Additional Physical Information: Her hairstyle is long and at times she ties it up. And other times she has it lose. Her shoe size is 4 and she has thin eyebrows. She has a tattoo on her arm it is three lines going across and one going down with three dot's at the side of the one line. She also has a birthmark that looks like the crest of light. (From Digimon)
And now, let’s return to our usual programming–
Annoying Special Abilities: Magik!111! 733t fighting skillz !!!eleventy-one!!! Is virtually impossible to kill (worse luck).
Other Annoying Traits: Has an unbelievably long, complex and wangsty backstory which happens to include elements from just about every fandom ever (just in case the Digimon birthmark didn’t tip you off). Is a “very gentle”, “kind”, “caring”, and “sensitive” SERIAL KILLER. I’m not making that up. Is headed for Middle-earth.
Prologue: Evening Falls Clunk!
It was raining hard as Melody left the club. She owned it here on Earth
Which is as detailed a location as we’ll get. Maybe this is in the future, and there aren’t any countires any more.
but it was her night off. In an hour it was going to open and she knew it would be packed. It was always packed.
If Mary Sue owns a nightcub, that club will be always packed. Always. Even at lunchtime.
She smiled as she wondered how long it would last. This was her life. She was strong and had gained a lot of friends here.
And killed them.
Two felt more like sisters to her. Her friend’s names on earth are Anna and Dee.
Uh... what are their names when they’re not on Earth?
Dee is a fun girl from Hawaii and Anna is a girl from Japan.
And where is Melody, then? Japan and Hawaii were on Earth, last time I checked. I’m not even why these people get mentioned, since they play no part whatever in the story.
Both are her friends and she is happy that she has them.
Not to mention lucky she has them.
Incidentally, how many times do we have to be told that Melody’s friends are her friends?
But they also live under the same roof.
*sepulchral tone* Not for long...
And yet on top of that Melody had taken in a little boy named Alex.
They let HER adopt a kid? I have just lost all faith in the government.
...The government of Earth, that is.
She saw him more as a son then anything. She got into the car where Alex was. She had come by the club to get a few things and had picked Alex up on the way. He had just done football and was upset about having to leave his football class without changing clothes again. They had argued about it when she picked him up.
Alex, here’s a word of advice: do not argue with this woman. EVER.
Melody heard an audible click
As opposed to an inaudible click.
above the music that was playing. Looking back, she saw that Alex had taken off his seatbelt. Melody was horrified at what she had seen.
The plot!
There was ice on the roads. These icy conditions scared her. She always worried that something bad would happen; today was no different . . . The slippery road and the icy rain still coming down were making driving more treacherous.
"You get that back on, young man," she yelled. "The road is too slick for you to do . . . " Melody had not been paying much to the young boy in the back.
Sounds like she’s making up for it now. Here’s a suggestion, Melody: how about watching the road?
Just as she said it, the tires slipped on the ice and the van lurched sideways.
See?
Melody’s breath caught in her throat. Fear thrilled though her as she turned the wheel, attempting to keep the car on the treacherous road. They were travelling at a snail’s pace anyway, but she knew that it wouldn’t matter once they really started to slip. Eventually the car stopped fighting her, allowing the van to roll to a precarious halt.
"Put the seat belt back on, please," Melody ground out angrily. She took a breath once she heard Alex put his seatbelt back on. “Sorry” The boy said. He had blonde hair and big deep green eyes. She had no love in her life.
It had been a difficult choice for Melody. Love, or serial killing? In the end her career of senseless violence had won out.
Melody only cared about Alex but the boy was still getting use to her. They drove for a few miles more. They were coming to the long bridge. On the other side of it was a small town that Melody had been living in. She lived with Alex and Dee as well as Anna. But Anna was always doing something and at times it seemed she was never home.
This would provide an excellent cover for her absence when Melody got around to burying her in a shallow grave in the woods.
Suddenly Alex screamed as something like a large white owl flew straight at the windshield.
Good Lord! Hedwig’s joined the PPC!
Melody yanked the steering wheel, trying to avoid hitting the creature, feeling the car slip sideways as she did so. A scream caught in her throat when the car didn’t respond regardless of which way she spun the wheel. The wheels slid and skidded on the icy pavement as Melody desperately fought for control, to no avail. The wheels had locked up. They were in a fast spin headed who knew where
Middle-earth, of course, like all the other car crash victims.
Once, when I was young and naive, I thought people actually died in those things!
until the jolt of the impact against the door screech of metal against metal told her that the van had careened off one of the guard rails near the bridge; bouncing off into another spin and through the other guard rail.
“Mother” Alex called out and Melody wondered if she had heard him right. More screaming metal assaulted her hearing. Then there was silence, as the car seemed to hang for a moment in mid air. For a fleeting moment Melody could swear she saw an image of a young man, tall and proud like a slender aspen tree, holding out his arms in welcome as a gentle breeze toyed with strands of his golden hair. His clear blue eyes seemed to call to her, a tender, good-natured smile tugging at his lips in invitation.
"Legolas?" she whispered in confusion. Why would he . . .
...have a tender, good-natured smile at the sight of Mary Sue #78,906? I don’t know, Suethor. Maybe he’s hoping to pass on the nasty venereal disease he picked up from the last Sue.
I mean, hey, you’re the one telling the story.
Suddenly her had slammed against the steering wheel disorienting her.
If she’d hit any other part of her body she might have got REALLY hurt.
Melody shook her head to clear the stars that swam before her eyes. She gathered her scattered wits as she breathed a shaky sigh of relief. They had landed in a tree. One of the limbs had smashed through the windshield and Melody could hear the murky water of the swollen creek rushing below her suspended car.
Melody... sweetheart... I don’t want to upset you or anything, but don’t you think that sigh of relief might have been a trifle premature?
Something flashed blue-white outside in the gloom. As Melody looked up she saw that there was a black hole with white and blue lighting going round it. It looked like one of those big black holes.
Oh, right. Yeah, we’ve got a few round where I live, too.
She held a look of fear. Alex seemed to be scared as he was shaking a little.
No, really?
Melody felt bad for the boy. She knew his mom and dad had died and that is why she took him in. She had felt like a mother to him but he never said mother to her. And when she had heard him say it she felt a ping in her heart.
That’s right, people– her heart went “PING!”
Fear raced through her. She had to get to him.
"Alex!" she cried, forcing down the panic that had started to rise. “Listen to me it will be all right” She said to the boy. "Oh Valar, save us! Save Alex please I implore you" she whispered. That was the last thing that went through her mind before the car door gave way.
For some reason that reminds me of one of those sick celebrity-death jokes.
And both Melody and Alex went into the big black hole with the white and blue lighting going round in it. Melody hit her head as she fell blood started to come out. She then slipped into unconsciousness.
Not that she’d been particularly conscious before.
Be sure to tune into the next thrilling installment, when we finally get to Chapter One...