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Jazz ([info]silverknight) wrote in [info]chaosunraveled,
@ 2008-07-05 20:02:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:finished thread, jazz, midvalley, rating: r, setting: niflheim

De-glitching's the game...
Who: Jazz, Midvalley
Where: the garage i.e. the room Jazz shares with Gin
When: directly after this.
Rating: R, maybe...
Warnings: sex...? (I'm really bad with the warning-giving)
Summary: After Sal leaves the garage, Jazz and Midvalley have some alone time.



Jazz cannot help but be happy that Sal left the room, as it gave him the chance to have Midvalley as to himself alone.

To make do with a good plan, he stands up and turns to go to his recharge berth. But, looking at the cold metal that is his 'bed' he is not sure that this is where he wants to be, as his human almost-third deserves better than a hard surface beneath his soft body. Much better.

He does not move one milimetre. With a humble mien he asks Midvalley: "Do you want to stay here or find a more comfortable place?"


(Post a new comment)


[info]hornfreak
2008-07-05 11:06 pm UTC (link)
"This is fine, as long you don't mind," says Midvalley. "The company is more important than the place..."

They had had their first time on a roof-top after all, and he certainly had no complaints about that.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-05 11:19 pm UTC (link)
"Why should I mind?"

Like in a trance he walks backwards until he arrives at the berth. There he sits down, providing an arm for Midvalley to use as a way up to him.

"Company makes even anihilation sound like paradise."

There is a light in the ocean-like crystals of Jazz' eyes, twinning the soft glow that starts to seep out of tiny cracks in his torso. His spark yearns for contact, a connection that he fears will only harm the man he more and more starts to think of as a third.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-05 11:25 pm UTC (link)
"Yes, it does," says Midvalley with a smile.

Midvalley grasps Jazz's arm and uses it to get up to the berth. So, this is where he "sleeps," to the extent that he sleeps at all.

He looks at Jazz, still needing to crane his neck upward to see the robot's face. Once again he reminds himself that this, not a holo, is the reality of his friend... his lover.



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[info]silverknight
2008-07-05 11:39 pm UTC (link)
The berth is not large for a Cybertronian bed, but as Midvalley now shares its space with him he is more than ever aware how... liberating it can be.

With a bit of awkwardness, Jazz lies down. At the same time he tries to lift his friend into his arms, as he really does not want to hurt the other with his weight.

"You..." is proclaimed with all the dignity that a heir to the Lord Protector can produce. "... are cute."

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-05 11:46 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley finds himself stretched out over Jazz, still looking at his face, acutely aware how much shorter he is than his partner.

"Why, thank you," he says in a light tone. "You're--" he hesitates here, as Jazz deserves a more dignified word than 'cute.' "quite... dashing, yourself."

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 12:03 am UTC (link)
His first reaction to the compliment is to say that 'really I'm more than short'. This thought has festered in his mind for some time now, as he's come to realize that everyone in his family is taller than him. Even the kid, he thinks as he manages to successfully not speak what wanted to be spoken.

Instead he leads his partner into a hug and finds himself kissing the so intriguing kind of dead dermal cells that only organics seem to produce. Hair is such a calming thing to touch.

"You have a way with words, my dear."

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 12:06 am UTC (link)
Midvalley shivers as Jazz kisses his hair. He runs his own hands over the robot's arms and torso, exploring the texture of the metal. Is he at all capable of pleasing Jazz in his true form? Is he even supposed to try?

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 12:23 am UTC (link)
Midvalley's hands, so soft and enthralling to him, give power to instincts that should only be allowed to run free when in a triade. The backlash energy being far too destructive if not chackled through a third.

Thus Jazz is both not surprized and dreadfully afraid as the miniscule cracks in his armour, those fine lines leading to his spark, open more and more. The pale glow of a million generations of nanites swimming in life giving energon paints the human skin like a nova sucked into the void of a black hole.

Were he able to do it, his breath would be taken away by the beauty before him. Beauty and danger of mortal consequence.

"You don't know what you do to me..." is whispered, a last scream for freedom from a prisoner that's already used to the weight of his chains.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 12:30 am UTC (link)
When Midvalley lowers his head to kiss Jazz's chest, he can see the light seeping from the cracks in Midvalley's shining skin.

"You do the same to me, you know," he says, and it's true.

The light scares him a little, especially when it intensifies. But he doesn't move away just yet, trusting Jazz to keep him safe -- safe from Jazz himself.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 12:50 am UTC (link)
It happens so fast that, for a moment as short as an imagined thought, Jazz does not realize what he's done.

The cracks have opened fully, giving room to hundreds of nanite-powered needles that have only one function: creating a connection to a third. They thrust upwards, seeking to impale Midvalley on their sharp tips.

No, he thinks, screams it as loud as he's able to.

Within the next nanosecond Jazz is on the other side of the room, crouched down and hands cramped into the fuel lines of his legs. He cannot look up, cannot bring himself to see what he obviously must have done.

To bring pain to a third is...

... unthinkable.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 01:02 am UTC (link)
Jazz wrenches himself away so fast that most of the needles don't hit Midvalley. The few that do mostly hit his suit, though a couple scratch the skin of his face or his arms through his shirt.

"I'm sorry, Jazz," he says a bit sadly. "I should have thought... we aren't compatible when you're in your real form. But I'm OK."

Realizing the robot is still hunched over on himself, he says, "You can look at me. I'm OK, Jazz."

[OOC: I hope I got that right as far as what they would/could do.]

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 01:18 am UTC (link)
[OOC: That's ok. We're pretty much entering AU here anyway, as far as TF canon goes.]


He hears the voice, sad words that seek to comfort him. He hears but does not hear. There is a barrier between himself and the outside that is defined by Midvalley, a barrier that to breath through Jazz lacks the power just now.

Again and again, repeated ad absurdum, he mubles words from his youth. Old phrases taken from long forgotten poetry and third declarations, a mantra of 'I'm sorry's and 'Please forgive me's.

The complex clicks and whirrs of his native language create a cocoon of noise around him. So dense is this cocoon that Jazz never is consciously aware of the glittering holo-mass leaving his body, the dripping fluid stretching over the expanse that is keeping two lovers apart.

The holo, when it finally completes, is no likeness of simulated flesh. It is Jazz as he is and always was, naked without the armour of his current body.

A protoform made fragile by the hopeless look on its face.

"You're bleeding," it stammers while the true-body convulses into painful fits of grief.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 01:28 am UTC (link)
Midvalley knows Jazz means for him to deal with the holo, but he approaches Jazz's true body instead. He has to prove he's not afraid, that he knows Jazz would never do that on purpose. He stands as near as he can, touches Jazz's leg slightly. "A few tiny scratches. I've had worse from shaving. I'm fine. And I'm sorry. I pushed you over the edge and I'm sorry."

He then approaches the holo, which is so very different from the one Jazz used before. He touches its face. "You don't need to cry, Jazz" he says in a soothing tone he hasn't used, hasn't had a need to use, in a very long time.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 01:41 am UTC (link)
True-body does not react to the well meaning touch if the small organic. It only keeps on doing what is already does, trying to apologize for an transgression as terrible as nothing else ever imagined.

The naked form shudders when Midvalley's hand makes contact. It makes an aborted move to excape. But instead of running as fast as he can, Jazz only collapses. A puppet with its strings cut, lifeless and empty.

"You're bleeding," he repeats. "One is supposed to protect a third, not hurt him. Never hurt." His words are clipped, hollow sounding like an echo that cannot be heard. "I'd rather die than damage a third."

An unsure hand tries to touch one of the wounds, stops and returns to his side without making contact.

"I don't want to hurt you," Jazz pleads. "You have to believe me. I never wanted to hurt you."

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 01:45 am UTC (link)
[OOC: I'm getting slightly confused... which form collapsed and which is talking now? Sorry about that...]

"I know you didn't mean to hurt me, Jazz. It's been a long time since I trusted anyone but I do trust you. I know you never wanted to hurt me."

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 01:54 am UTC (link)
[OOC: the naked form, the holo I mean. Sorry for the confusion. I didn't want to make it so for you.]

"I know that here," he replies. The shivering construct hands indicating his head.

"But here..." Now both hands fold over his chest, as if to protect the very spark lying dormant behind metal flesh. Deadly thing that is presents for Midvalley.

"... here all I want it to turn back time and unmake what I've done to you."

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 02:16 am UTC (link)
Midvalley nods, still holding his hands out to the construct but unsure if his touch is welcome.

"I wish for your sake you could do that. Or I wish... I wish I could do what a robot could, with you." He says the last part almost silently.

"But now you're in pain over this, and I don't want you to be."

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 02:24 am UTC (link)
"But you're hurt," comes in a voice as innocent as a small child's laugh.

Hesitatingly, he tries to hug Midvalley. It seems to him as if he is afraid the human will break apart and leave nothing but fast evaporating dust coating his fingers.

"I don't know how to make it better."

On the other side of the room, Jazz' real body begins to calm down. In the end, only the soft rhythmic breath of cooling pumps can be heard.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 02:33 am UTC (link)
Midvalley puts his arms around the holo and stroke its head as if he is comforting a child, something he is wholly unused to. "It's really nothing, Jazz. It's not even bleeding anymore."

He's tempted to say "Kiss it and make it better," but Jazz might not be in the mood for jokes, or kisses anymore.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 02:47 am UTC (link)
This is what this whole ordeal was supposed to be from the beginning on. Comfort given because of a heart-given urge.

No pain. No danger. Just a third on the way to healing.

Jazz - he is not sure what produces the sound, hologram or true body - whispers a promise to the air. Words that hide their meaning behind the walls of language. All to make sure that Midvalley does not 'hear'.

For these words cannot, must not be spoken. If they were understood, everything would change.

"Third of my line," he speaks these forbidden words to a lover that he cannot touch. "Most cherished part of my self."

It does no longer matter if someone understands his language. The only thing that matters is saying the words.

Even if they threaten to rip open his very spark.


[OOC: It's near to midnight here. I'll go to bed. Til tomorrow then.]

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 03:03 am UTC (link)
Midvalley hears a voice, but doesn't understand the words. They don't even really sound like words, to him, but he thinks they must be Jazz's language. He doesn't ask what they mean, just kisses the holo gently on the mouth and stands, breathing softly and waiting for a reaction.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 01:55 pm UTC (link)
The kiss is... enchanting. Effulgent in its perfection.

For a moment's breath there is no reaction, then Jazz' avatar stands as well. He looks at Midvalley for a long time, listening to the sounds of life the human body produces.

The low gurgling of blood running through veins. The thud-thud-thud of a heart beating time away in a rhythm as old as the universe. The more felt than heard sound of a eye blinking.

He looks and listens and waits for the right moment.

Now, he thinks. Do it now, or it will all break apart like cluster of G'br Vq'yz.

He kisses Midvalley. A kiss filled with everything that was and always will be.

When it's over, the holo is using the form that shared a pleasant time on a roof top with the musician.

There is a bittersweet smile on Jazz' now human features.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 09:42 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley savors the kiss, draws himself into it.

When he sees that the holo has changed, he smiles also, though he notes the slight sadness Jazz still carries. He almost speaks, but this isn't a time for words. He puts his arms around the holo and draws it close, running his hands down its back.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 11:00 pm UTC (link)
[OOC: continued here.]

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-06 10:59 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley's hands on his back are feeling nice, bringing him back into a reality that for a short time he feared to have lost. He tries to banish the sadness from his face, but...

... it will not work.

Instead he allows himself to be pulled closer, to fall into the embrace that stands between himself and all those things he does not want to remember now.

"I want to be human for you."

On the other side of the romm, a safe distance away from his dear friend, the eyes of his true form alight with recognition. The words were spoken, the promise made.

There is no coming back.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-06 11:56 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley pulls back slightly, looking into Jazz's holo's eyes. He considers brushing the statement off as being in the heat of passion, but he is sure his companion considers his words carefully even then.

"Jazz... even if it were possible... could you really be happy that way?"

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 12:06 am UTC (link)
"I don't know."

His gaze leaves Midvalley and finds the silver reflection of a mech's body. Constructed eyes look into crystalline blue. Both the real thing and the avatar nod.

"I can't hurt you again. I must not allow it."

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 12:39 am UTC (link)
Midvalley is confused. It's not even possible for Jazz to be human, so is this his way of saying good-bye?

"You didn't mean to hurt me. I just should have remembered that I'm not... physically compatible with a giant robot. That's why you make holos, right?"

He strokes the holo's face and tries to smile.

"I know it's not the same as... being with your thirds. I can't do anything about that either, being only human. But I can promise not to do anything to set off that reaction again, can't I?"

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 12:54 am UTC (link)
"There's nothing you can do," he replies, his eyes closing while a cherished hand touches his face.

"Because something inside of me sees you as compatible. I can play all I want, create facsimiles as perfect as they can get, and you'll still feel like a third to me."

He mimics Midvalley's touch, his fingers moving over endearingly perfect skin. His thoughts drown in subjectivity.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 01:00 am UTC (link)
Midvalley isn't certain what to say, now. It doesn't sound like good-bye; in fact it sounds like Jazz is more attached to him than before. And he has to admit to being attached himself.

"I understand you, I think. I wish... well, is there any point in wishing things were different?" He presses his body close to the holo's. "Can you be with me, at least, in the way we do have? Because... I do care about you, Jazz, and I don't want-- I don't want to lose even this?"

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 01:16 am UTC (link)
[OOC: Just wanted to tell you that one of the fic writers I know likes the plot we have going here.]


"Shh," Jazz whispers. His head pressing into the hollow between Midvalley's head and shoulder. He kisses the neck.

"I won't leave you alone." There is desperation in his voice, a kind of scared undertone that is all to aware that he'll be very lucky to have even half a vorn with his human.

Half a vorn. It's such a short time. Such a dreadfully short time.

"I won't leave you alone."


[OOC2: A vorn is roughly 83 human years. It's something of a year on Cybertron.]

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 01:21 am UTC (link)
[OOC: That's great! Thanks for telling me.]

Midvalley cradles Jazz's head against his shoulder. No one in his life has ever said that to him, because no one could, epecially back in the Gung-ho Guns. Even his mother had been gone so early, when he was so young... but he isn't going to think about Sylvia now. He's going to think about Jazz.

"That's good... because I'm going to be here, Jazz, OK? I'm... not going anywhere."

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 01:39 am UTC (link)
What a nice way to lie, Jazz cannot help to think but in the end only borrows deeper into the embrace. He knows that such promises cannot be kept, that time is their greatest enemy here.

"That's a promise?"

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 01:44 am UTC (link)
"I can't promise forever, Jazz. Especially not your version of forever. But I'm not going anywhere... that I can say, for truth."

He wonders if he should add "Unless the other side gets me," but Jazz has been a soldier, and he must know the score on that.

[OOC: On that note I have to get going for now. See you later, I hope?]

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 02:02 am UTC (link)
"That's all I need to know."

While they're talking, Jazz' real body moves closer until it is close enough to touch but still away enough to not present a danger to Midvalley.

"Look at me," the holo says, meaning the true form.

The bot's chest opens, revealing pale blue fluid which swirls around in what for a human would be a heart. For his people it is only a storage unit, this little thing that contains everything a child of Cybertron can ever be. This is his spark chanber.

"Look at me," he repeats.

The nanite filled liquid they call energon for simplicity's sake seems to move on it's own accord. As if it were a living thing... and that is what it is.

This mass of deadly 'slime' is what Jazz is. Everything that makes Jazz the individual he is now is stored in these swimming memory cells.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 10:52 am UTC (link)
Midvalley turns his had and stares at what Jazz is showing him. He wonders if this is his heart, but his words seem to indicate that it's more.

"This is ... your essence?" he asks. He is still touching the holo, but not looking at it now.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 01:13 pm UTC (link)
"My spark," Jazz' replies. "What gives me life."

The metal body stands still, like a statue frozen in a moment's blink.

With a final hug, the avatar steps away from Midvalley and closer to the open spark chamber. Slim fingers move to touch the liquid and take a handful away from the greater mass.

It seems as if the liquid drips down his fingers, but it is only the pale blue nanites trying to understand new surroundings.

"This is me," he says again. "Everything else..."

Here he indicates the metal of his true-form's armour, even the holo.

"... is just an add-on."

He knows he is over-simplifying. There is a huge part of the rules of nanite symbiosis he doesn't even attempt to explain, as these tiny cells can be found everywhere in his body, be it armour, fuel lines or everything else.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 10:23 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley looks at the shimmering liquid, at Jazz, and at the holo. His knowledge of even his home world's technology is limited, but he thinks he knows what Jazz is showing him.

"That's... you," he says. "I think I understand."

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 10:33 pm UTC (link)
Both avatar and Jazz smile.

The spark chamber closes until not even tiny lines in the armour are a reminder of what is hidden inside.

"Good," Jazz replies, then a soft "Let me hold you," follows. He opens his arms, as if he needed to reassure himself that his true form will not damage Midvalley in any way.

"Please..."

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 10:38 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley walks forward. He trusts Jazz, and if Jazz wants to embrace him with his real arms, he will let him do it. He stands inches away from the robot and nods. "It's all right."

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 10:47 pm UTC (link)
These short words of permission are all that Jazz has needed. With a sound that can only be described as a sob leaving his voice modulator, he takes Midvalley into his arms.

"My third, my beautiful third." he murmurs in the sibilant tones of his home.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 11:06 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley doesn't understand the words in Jazz's native language, but he feels comforted all the same. He knows and always knew that Jazz didn't mean to hurt him, and he lays his head against Jazz's armored chest and murmurs "It's all right."

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-07 11:20 pm UTC (link)
For a moment, surrounded by Midvalley's warm breath on his chest, he thinks: I could stay like this forever.

Jazz lowers his head, so that it now creates a shadow over Midvalley. An onlooker would see it as a protective gesture, the body of the smaller being nearly hidden in total from the eyes of others.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-07 11:28 pm UTC (link)
Midvalley stands in the circle of Jazz's arms. He hopes now that the robot feels assured that he trusts him, that he isn't upset. It's a strange feeling, being encircled by metal, but he relaxes and thinks of Jazz.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-08 01:28 am UTC (link)
This is what it means to be third: Safety found in the presense of another. Silence that need not be disturbed. Reality that is not a dream.

This is what it means to be alive: Being able to feel a third's proximity. Being able to protect a third. Hope in the shadow of pain.

Jazz is sure that sometime in the future everything will make sense, that he will understand why he was compelled to choose this fragile individual as his... dearest companion.

For now though, he is content to just be allowed to hold Midvalley.

Without being conscious of it, he begins to hum an old melody, a lullaby his little 'Bee always wanted to hear when the young one was plagued by bad dreams in recharge time.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-08 01:51 am UTC (link)
Midvalley is surprised at how much his own heart has been touched by all of this, after the roughness of his past life, but the only good way he has to express such feelings is his music. Notes are much easier for him than words.

Then he hears Jazz start to hum. So Jazz does make music of his own. That seems extremely charming right now. The melody is soothing, and Midvalley closes his eyes.

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-08 11:34 am UTC (link)
The melody calms him, brings his thoughts into a long gone past and allows him to remember the good thing before everything broke apart.

Slow, oh so slow, his systems fall inot recharge mode. And though his energy levels are not so much depleted that there really is a need for it, he does not fight sleep.

With his third in his arms, Jazz begins to sleep.

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[info]hornfreak
2008-07-09 03:59 am UTC (link)
Midvalley soon realizes that Jazz is in his version of sleep now. At least he had relaxed and calmed down from his earlier agitation about the accident. And it was... pleasant... being in his arms, actually.

Sparing a brief thought to wonder what Jazz's roommate might think finding them here like this, he closed his own eyes and hummed the same tune as he fell asleep.

[[OOC: End thread? Though it will be funny if the roommate does find them... XD]]

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[info]silverknight
2008-07-09 05:12 pm UTC (link)
[OOC: Denial thy friend is Delilah. I'm trying to avoid thinking about what happened today, so...

OOC2: End sounds ok. And yes it would be funny.]

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